What's the worst thing you have done when drunk ?

whats the worst thing you have done when drunk , either something you remember doing or something someone has later told you you did ?


Mine was getting drunk on christmas eve 4 years ago and pissing allover the turkey to try and defrost it ! it really did seem like a good idea at the time .

Going swimming off a yacht when rat-faced.

Many years ago now - but the worst feeling is when you hit the water and then suddenly realise your arms, legs and body.... don't work. Never again.

I've probably done more worse and stupider things on dry land but I'm too ashamed to write it.

So how the the parents-in-law enjoy the bird, Kenny?

Linebreaker wrote:Going swimming off a yacht when rat-faced.

Many years ago now - but the worst feeling is when you hit the water and then suddenly realise your arms, legs and body.... don't work. Never again.

I've probably done more worse and stupider things on dry land but I'm too ashamed to write it.

So how the the parents-in-law enjoy the bird, Kenny?

We through the turkey away blaming the dog for eating it and ended up having a very small chicken for christmas dinner , the missus laughs about it now and everyone knows the truth now but she really lost at the time .

and I thought you were joking....

What's your crispy golden chicken like?

Linebreaker wrote:and I thought you were joking....

What's your crispy golden chicken like?

Very nice extra crispy , true story me and my brother in law cracked open a bottle of tequila and got steaming drunk , the wife asked if i had taken the turkey out of the freezer ( which i'd forgot to do) so us 2 drunken idiots were in the garage trying to defrost this turkey anyway we could when the idea hit me . Wife and her sister walked in to see me peeing on it while my brother in law was nearly choking laughing . We ended up with a small kitchen from sister in laws freezer instead .

that is why i no longer drink tequila !!!!

When I was about 15 me and my mates used to get someone's relative to buy us drink and we'd go down the bandstand on the river and one night me and another mate thought it would be a good idea to wake up all the Canada geese by giving them all a slap on the tail. Don't think I've run faster in my life.

Another time, I don't know if this is true but, as I was too far gone to go home without being noticed by Mum and Dad I stayed at a friends and when his Mum made me a coffee I apparently told her to put it down and f- off. It's been 5 years and to this day I still don't if it's true but I apologised a million times after my mates told me.

Mate, you have to say "Put it down and please f-off"
Good manners is paramount!

Yes. Where were my manners when telling the woman who's been like an aunt to me for 14 years to f-off? Lol

KingKenny7Heaven wrote:What says whats the worst thing you have done when drunk

I can't remember her name.

greybeard wrote:

KingKenny7Heaven wrote:Whats the worst thing you have done when drunk

I can't remember her name.

think we have all been there .

I've barred myself from going anywhere near ebay whilst under the influence.

Not bought anything too crazy but I find myself looking at clothes I might just possibly have worn 25 years ago. You're 42 not 17 Swanny, put the blydi ra-ra skirt down!!!

I think there should be a breathlyser for computers whereby it shuts itself down if you have over the legal limit. I could make a killing! You do the same with phones and boom!

But then how would you phone your taxi and order your kebab?

Remember telling my mate I'd slept with his bird a few weeks before he'd introduced us. I was really gutted and had been tearing my heart out about wether to tell him or not because theyd been going out for about 6 months and he was head over heels for her and I'd met her (without knowing who she was) on a night out. So I decided when drunk to tell him, and started mouthing off to her about how much of a poisonous bint she was in front of everyone. Me and my pal end up having a massive ruck that needs to get broken up by the police.

Turns out her and her older sister are each others double.

KingKenny7Heaven wrote:

greybeard wrote:

KingKenny7Heaven wrote:Whats the worst thing you have done when drunk

I can't remember her name.

think we have all been there .

Ah, you know her too? Doesn't surprise me.

KingKenny7Heaven wrote:
We ended up with a small kitchen from sister in laws freezer instead

Your sister in law must have a very big freezer

If I were Mrs KK I'd have sent you to the Salvation Army for your Christmas dinner, after you'd urinated on the turkey

Solerina wrote:

KingKenny7Heaven wrote:
We ended up with a small kitchen from sister in laws freezer instead

Your sister in law must have a very big freezer

If I were Mrs KK I'd have sent you to the Salvation Army for your Christmas dinner, after you'd urinated on the turkey

I didn't see that

I just noticed it too... you must have been absolutely plastered!

Plastered then Plastered when posting , im surprised there were not more mistakes .

Christ I have done so many in my younger days, but if I put them here I could still be arrested!
Funniest was probably dancing for hours with a girl in Jumping Jacks in Swansea, when she was on the stage and I was below on the dance floor, and she lifted her dress up to reveal she was naked underneath... I really should of made the effort to talk to her rather than just standing there with my jaw touching the floor!
What a wasted oppertunity that was, lol.

Another one in Jumping Jacks again and getting invited by 2 girls to their house in Dunvant, but I wouldn't leave my mate and insisted he joined us but they didn't like him, so I left it, as I didn't want to leave my friend behind.

Second worst thing was losing my temper and smashing through someone front door, after they cheap shoted me in the street. I was standing outside a chip shop and this guy hit me from behind, to show off to his mate, sadly he didnt finish the job and I chased him to his house. He slammed his front door as he run inside, but I went through it.
I punched through the glass on their front door so many times that the skin on my hand had peeled away and you could actually see the bone of my thumb and the ligaments around it, basically it was hanging on by the nail. I didn't feel it or notice it at the time because I was trying to get hold of the guy who hit me, though when I broke through his front door, he had a baseball bat in his hand, so I had to cut my losses to be honest.
I still have scars all over my hand to this day because of it, I guess I'm just lucky the doctor put it all back together properly. For years I had glass stuck in my hand, and when I made a fist the skin would tighten down on the glass causing pain, over time I have cut the glass pieces out though.
The funny thing was my girl friend was watching and simply said "why didnt you kick the door through, and save your hand?"
Womens logic!

Wow... what was the ''cheap shot"?

I've seen my achilles tendon and was shocked that it was a yellowish colour.

I'd been watching something and had left a beer glass on the floor next to the sofa. When I got up, my left leg swung through and completely 'caught' the glass between my other foot. (I was barefoot at the time). As with these these type of accidents - you don't feel much. Actually, it felt like nothing. However, when I looked down there was an amazing amount of blood... so dark red too!

That's when I saw the tendon. I put a band-aid on it initially... then went to the doctor's who put a few stitches in.

Just remembered another one. Quite a while ago, when I was a teenager, I was fiddling with a TV (whilst drunk) and got this massive electric shock which threw me about 2-3 meters across the room. I let out a guttural yelp... as you do... and I recall landing pretty hard against a bookcase - almost winding myself. It was an amazing feeling flying backwards... like being shot from a cannon.

I gambled and lost 500 quid on an Argentinian football match a few years ago. I remember waking up wondering whether I had dreamed it only to find the harsh reality when I logged onto my Betfair account!

Boxing day a couple of years back I got run over by a taxi I was trying to flag down. I think the laughing actually numbed the pain!

I once told a girl I loved her an hour after meeting her such was my desperation back then. I remember her calling me a weirdo when she saw me a few weeks after!

When I was 20 I was having dirty relations with this complete bimbo.....anyway whilst at a house party I was proper running her down telling everybody how dumb she was only to later find out that her sister was one of them persons I was speaking to!

I could go on for days!

FreekShow wrote:I gambled and lost 500 quid on an Argentinian football match a few years ago. I remember waking up wondering whether I had dreamed it only to find the harsh reality when I logged onto my Betfair account!

Boxing day a couple of years back I got run over by a taxi I was trying to flag down. I think the laughing actually numbed the pain!

I once told a girl I loved her an hour after meeting her such was my desperation back then. I remember her calling me a weirdo when she saw me a few weeks after!

When I was 20 I was having dirty relations with this complete bimbo.....anyway whilst at a house party I was proper running her down telling everybody how dumb she was only to later find out that her sister was one of them persons I was speaking to!

I could go on for days!

list them all im loving it .

Just for you Kenny.

I lived in a bedsit once and the guy above me would always play Drum n Bass really loud. One day it became too much so I knocked his door and as soon as it opened I swung the biggest fist of my life....and sparked his brother!

Me and a mate brought two girls back to my flat once where I had a dartboard. After throwing one of the girls was on her way to retrieve her darts when I let one go and put it into her left shoulder!

Once whilst smoking a cigarette I leaned too far out of a window and ended up falling onto a porch!

Did you ask him to turn it down first?

Linebreaker wrote: Did you ask him to turn it down first?

No! Back then I was an angry young man who acted first and thought later!

i wet myself

Great to see you again Pauline. Enjoyed the tennis?

Linebreaker wrote:Great to see you again Pauline. Enjoyed the tennis?

not really lol

I did, something new

Linebreaker wrote:I did, something new

2nd worse think i did was watch the news

whats happened... apart from nuclear spill in France?

Once got so drunk on a night out that i ended up going home with some girl i had just met , which doesnt seem so bad and in my younger days i did it a lot , but on this occasion i awoke to find myself in a strange house 72 miles from home ! that was an expensive taxi home .

The other week I was out and annoyed at something (not entirely sure what) so I kicked a lamppost as hard as I could. I remember it really hurting but I had to pretend it didn't, otherwise I'd look like (even more of) an idiot. Woke up the next day and could barely walk!

Woke up in a forest 4 miles from home one morning. No idea how I got there, and it was especially weird as I must have walked by my house to get into the forest in the first place! Also it's a spot where people take their dogs/kids/old people for walks, so needless to say I was getting some strange looks for being a flithy, staggering bum.

Wet the bed. At 22/23.

Pulled out some plants and chucked them across the road right in front of a police car. Policeman got out and pointed behind me saying "did you do all that?" I looked behind to see soil and plants scattered everywhere - it looked like a load of wild dogs were let loose in a flower bed. I think I managed to convince them in the end though.

So many more disgusting/illegal/immoral/embarrassing things that I couldn't mention on a public forum. Things that if I seen someone doing now, I'd think, "what a d!ck".