Friday Fun - Boxing Limericks

First topic message reminder :

Saw this idea on another board, thought it was a good idea.

How it hopefully works, I will give the first line of a limerick, and then all you need to do is copy that first line and add the second, then someone else can copy the first two and add the third etc etc

Even with the helpful “somebody has posted in the meantime” feature we should still get too much confusion and duplication.

That has got to be one of the worst explanations of an idea that I’ve ever done, but hopefully you get the gist of it.

Let us begin...


There once was a boxer named Tyson,

Zimbabwean heavy Jukebox Timebomb

Zimbabwean heavy Jukebox Timebomb
Looked for a box he could climb on

To eat his curd and way.

Zimbabwean heavy Jukebox Timebomb
Looked for a box he could climb on
To eat his curd and way
So some people say

Zimbabwean heavy Jukebox Timebomb
Looked for a box he could climb on
To eat his curd and way
So some people say
He's bought one off Harry Simon

When pronouncing the name Lucian Bute

When pronouncing the name Lucian Bute
It pays to remain quite astute

When pronouncing the name Lucian Bute
It pays to remain quite astute
I've heard its "Buh-Tay"

When pronouncing the name Lucian Bute
It pays to remain quite astute
I've heard its "Buh-Tay"
That's what you say !

When pronouncing the name Lucian Bute
It pays to remain quite astute
I've heard its "Buh-Tay
That's what you say
I'm too late with mine, aw shoot!

When pronouncing the name Lucian Bute
It pays to remain quite astute
I've heard its "Buh-Tay"
That's what you say !
But only if you want to be cute

"I was robbed" complained Henry Cooper

"I was robbed" complained Henry Cooper
Everything was going super
Bugner provided the test
But I was the best
Then Harry stuck me right in the pooper

"I was robbed" complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor

Blimey, that was quick, ( said the late one )

Got ahead of meself for a bit...I'll backtrack though

"I was robbed" complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor
He went Supernova

"I was robbed" complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor
He went Supernova
Knocked Cassius over

"I was robbed" complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor
He went Supernova
Worked George Cooper over

Really not my day for paying attention to the ' message already posted ' thingy, is it ?

I was robbed complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor
A rematch was due with some good old spice
But Joe said forget it we'll never fight twice!!

TRUSSMAN66 wrote:I was robbed complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor
A rematch was due with some good old spice
But Joe said forget it we'll never fight twice!!

The standard form of a limerick is a stanza of five lines, with the first, second and fifth usually rhyming with one another and having three feet of three syllables each; and the shorter third and fourth lines also rhyming with each other, but having only two feet of three syllables. The defining "foot" of a limerick's meter is usually the anapaest, (ta-ta-TUM), but limericks can also be considered amphibrachic (ta-TUM-ta).

Union Cane wrote:

TRUSSMAN66 wrote:I was robbed complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor
A rematch was due with some good old spice
But Joe said forget it we'll never fight twice!!

The standard form of a limerick is a stanza of five lines, with the first, second and fifth usually rhyming with one another and having three feet of three syllables each; and the shorter third and fourth lines also rhyming with each other, but having only two feet of three syllables. The defining "foot" of a limerick's meter is usually the anapaest, (ta-ta-TUM), but limericks can also be considered amphibrachic (ta-TUM-ta).

Dear good Union, you could suck the joy out of a Lottery win, lad!

I'm just throwing out ideas and that's what you get......

Try saying the third and fourth lines more quickly and pretend someone else wrote them..

So you could look at it more objectively.

I was robbed complained Henry Cooper
As he bored the whole world to a stupor
A rematch was due with some good old spice
But Joe said forget it we'll never fight twice
Lets go to the local disco and dance to my favourite Abba song, Super Trouper

I bought my degree from Keele Poly

I bought my degree from Keele Poly
With my Father-in-Law's lovely lolly

DAVE667 wrote:I bought my degree from Keele Poly
With my Father-in-Law's lovely lolly

But my buttocks are oiled

I bought my degree from Keele Poly
With my Father-in-Law's lovely lolly
But my buttocks are oiled
And my plan has been foiled

Legend wrote:I bought my degree from Keele Poly
With my Father-in-Law's lovely lolly
But my buttocks are oiled
And my plan has been foiled

But hey, least my milkman's quite jolly.

BALTIMORA wrote:

Legend wrote:I bought my degree from Keele Poly
With my Father-in-Law's lovely lolly
But my buttocks are oiled
And my plan has been foiled

But hey, least my milkman's quite jolly.

Balti, change that to "postman" and you've cracked it

Isn't that what his wife said when the kids asked what daddy did for a living..?

The best tomato cans

Never have any fans

They fall on the floor

The best tomato cans
Never have any fans
They fall on the floor
Get used like a whore

The best tomato cans
Never have any fans
They fall on the floor
Get used like a whore
Despite their best laid plans

Argentinian champ Carlos Monzon

Argentinian champ Carlos Monzon
Saw Atkinson on TV and said, "Big Ron's on!"

Argentinian champ Carlos Monzon
Had a cigarette lighter from Ronson

AGAIN !

Sorry, guys - I need to wake up and pay attention. Last time - promise.

Argentinian champ Carlos Monzon
Saw Atkinson on TV and said, "Big Ron's on!"
Famous for his hair trigger
Said, "He's a lazy devil"
And his pundit career was done!

HumanWindmill wrote:AGAIN !

Sorry, guys - I need to wake up and pay attention. Last time - promise.

You SAY that but I'm beginning to have my doubts..and I'm famous for my ability to see the best in just about everyone...even that git D4!

"I need to wake up and pay attention"
Yes you do, but I didn't like to mention

DAVE667 wrote:

HumanWindmill wrote:AGAIN !

Sorry, guys - I need to wake up and pay attention. Last time - promise.

You SAY that but I'm beginning to have my doubts..and I'm famous for my ability to see the best in just about everyone...even that git D4!

Suitably rebuked, Sire.

Must try harder.

"I need to wake up and pay attention"
Yes you do, but I didn't like to mention
It's not easy to do

"I need to wake up and pay attention"
Yes you do, but I didn't like to mention
It's not easy to do
When you're 102

"I need to wake up and pay attention"
Yes you do, but I didn't like to mention
It's not easy to do
When you're 102
And drawing an old person's pension

Yorkshiremen, known to be dour

Yorkshiremen, known to be dour
At a rate of three hundred an hour

HumanWindmill wrote:Yorkshiremen, known to be dour

Alas, cometh the man, cometh the hour