Classic Chat-Up Lines.

by Swanseadabber Thu 31 Mar 2011, 9:43 pm

Whats the best one you've heard?

by User Name Fri 01 Apr 2011, 7:40 am

At Christmas time, i asked a bird for her photo, she asked why?, I said it was so i could show Santa what i wanted for christmas, it worked.

8)

by Stealth Maestro Agro Love Fri 01 Apr 2011, 7:58 am

Hehe.... my friend somehow picked up a friend like this:

Friend: Hey, Kate! (Big hug). I haven't seen you forEVER!! (huge kiss) Wow, you've really changed!

Kate: I'm not Kate

Friend: What? Oh my God, you even changed your name!

I have little to no idea how it worked, it just did. Shocked

by **Pr4wn** Fri 01 Apr 2011, 12:08 pm

You don't sweat much for a fat bird.

by President Trump Fri 01 Apr 2011, 12:12 pm

Get your coat......Ive got a knife, works 100% of the time

by Guest Fri 01 Apr 2011, 11:14 pm

How'd you like your eggs in the morning ?

Un-fertilised thank you

by Solerina Sat 02 Apr 2011, 3:34 pm

Jubbahey wrote:How'd you like your eggs in the morning ?

Un-fertilised thank you

ROFL!

Solerina

by Perfect Jack Sat 02 Apr 2011, 5:56 pm

Hi.

Get's em everytime 8)

by TipToes88 Tue 05 Apr 2011, 11:31 am

does this smell like chlorofilm?

sorry that was a bad one

long one but it has worked although its more of a finisher than a ice breaker. Start a convo with a girl until you get comfy with her. Once you have her interested keep staring at your watch, lots. Eventually she'll ask if your bored/late etc then comes the line.

Guy- "oh I'm really sorry. My dad got me a psychic watch for my birthday, it tells me all sorts. Right now its telling me your not wearing any underwear"
Girl- "I am wearing underwear"
Guy- *taps watch annoyed* "Damn it not again....damn things running an hour fast again Smile

"

cheesy, lame and sightly seedy but i was 3 for 3 on that till i met my mrs.

by **Enforcer** Tue 05 Apr 2011, 4:34 pm

There's a party in my boxers....and you're invited!

by David Tails Tue 05 Apr 2011, 4:51 pm

You've got eyes like spanners.

Everytime I look in to them, my nuts get tighter.

by User Name Tue 05 Apr 2011, 11:07 pm

If you were a door, id bang you all night long.

by TipToes88 Wed 06 Apr 2011, 10:17 am

Were both your parents retarded? because your pretty damn special

by Kay Fabe Wed 06 Apr 2011, 10:48 am

Did you just fart there? coz you blew me away

by Kay Fabe Wed 06 Apr 2011, 10:50 am

If you where a solero I'd be licking you all night!

by Kay Fabe Wed 06 Apr 2011, 10:50 am

I may not be the best looking lad here, but hey I'm the only one talking to you!

by Guest Wed 06 Apr 2011, 10:55 am

Get in the van.

by Guest Wed 06 Apr 2011, 7:39 pm

Somewhere in the Appalachian hills.....

Hi beautiful.....with your 11 fingers and my 9 toes we could make great music together.

by Solerina Wed 06 Apr 2011, 9:06 pm

I think most of you lot must be single!

Solerina

by Marsh Wed 06 Apr 2011, 9:13 pm

I'm not fred flintstone but i'll make your bedrock

by **Enforcer** Wed 06 Apr 2011, 9:43 pm

Sol, I'm married and I actually sent the line I posted to my wife in work on Monday!!

Before you ask...no it didn't work!

by Solerina Wed 06 Apr 2011, 10:33 pm

Enforcer wrote:Sol, I'm married and I actually sent the line I posted to my wife in work on Monday!!

Before you ask...no it didn't work!

Lol.......I'm not surprised!

Loving this thread.....do keep your chat up lines coming : )

Solerina

by Dexter Morgan Wed 06 Apr 2011, 11:07 pm

King Beer wrote:Get in the van.

I might try this one.

by Legend Thu 07 Apr 2011, 7:08 am

I'm a freelance gynocologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?

You are just truly absolutely beautiful! Can you cook and clean also?

by Stealth Maestro Agro Love Thu 07 Apr 2011, 7:55 am

King Beer wrote:Get in the van.

I like this one. 8)

by theundisputedY2D2 Thu 07 Apr 2011, 1:39 pm

You are a horrible, horrible human being. You're ugly and you smell. No-one will ever love you. Fancy going for a coffee?

by TipToes88 Thu 07 Apr 2011, 4:00 pm

Eurgh, can you come back in 3 pints time?

by SugarRayRussell (PBK) Sun 10 Apr 2011, 7:30 pm

You're in luck I'm really drunk

by Gaelic-Warrior Sun 10 Apr 2011, 10:41 pm

Two that have worked for me before-

"...want to see my loch ness monster"?

"I've lost my teddy bear.....can I sleep with you instead tonight"?

by **Enforcer** Mon 11 Apr 2011, 11:45 am

The first one worked? Unless she was a Scottish scientist searching for the Loch Ness Monster and you duped her into saying yes!

by Scottrf Thu 14 Apr 2011, 3:54 pm

Doesn't count if the chat up line is accompanied by a knife.

by Adam D Thu 14 Apr 2011, 4:52 pm

or Rahypnol

by MR. scotland27 Thu 14 Apr 2011, 6:32 pm

Do you like Chocolate? Then drop your snickers and ill give you a boost...

by User Name Fri 15 Apr 2011, 7:55 am

Does this chloroform smell funny to you?

by GG Sat 16 Apr 2011, 11:52 pm

I've got some sweets in my truck...

by Luke Sun 17 Apr 2011, 6:08 am

If i could re-arrange the alphabet, i would put u and i together.

by Guest Sun 17 Apr 2011, 1:07 pm

Are you tired? You've been running through my mind all day!

by User Name Sun 17 Apr 2011, 5:09 pm

There's a party in my pant's and your invited.

or...

Fancy a ride.

by Blunderbuss Mon 09 May 2011, 12:00 pm

How much??

or.......

Kip with me and will give you an intro to my goodlooking mate!!

by TipToes88 Tue 10 May 2011, 11:40 am

get totally legless, grab a girl and scream "Here Saraaah, I reeeaaally fancy you so hoooo abowwwt it eh?"

for people who did'nt live in Scotland in the 90's

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DgTK_xJK_hg

classic ad

by AquaArab Tue 10 May 2011, 5:24 pm

"get totally legless, grab a girl and scream "Here Saraaah, I reeeaaally fancy you so hoooo abowwwt it eh?"
That was the same chat up line and technique I always used. Probably explains why I'm still a virgin. Sad

by TipToes88 Wed 11 May 2011, 12:50 pm

dunno, I'm sure it worked for that guy. Did you not see her walk away from him...she was getting her coat Smile

by AquaArab Wed 11 May 2011, 1:50 pm

Maybe it is just because I'm fricken ugly then.

by TipToes88 Wed 11 May 2011, 3:32 pm

I'm sure that is not the case. Maybe they just don't like United fans?

by AquaArab Wed 11 May 2011, 5:00 pm

Maybe I should put a bag over my head and wear a Barcelona top. Then I could use the chat up line, "Hey there I'm Messi. But if you swallow quick enough it shouldn't be a problem."

by Liam_Main Wed 11 May 2011, 6:22 pm

I know Charlie Sheen.Gets them straight away.

by theundisputedY2D2 Thu 12 May 2011, 1:22 pm

"Did it hurt when you fell down from heaven?"

Then when she rolls her eyes, punch her in the face and say:

"Well, how about that then?"

60% of the time, it works EVERY time.

by camerajuan Fri 13 May 2011, 2:21 pm

"Aaaawww, you're alone in a foreign country and its too hot even with the window open? Fancy a maasive game of hide & seek in Morocco?"

Still looking............best line ever.

by TipToes88 Mon 16 May 2011, 9:47 am

wow, I'm fairly up for dark jokes but that was shocking

by camerajuan Mon 16 May 2011, 5:04 pm

I refer you to the "jokes" thread on this page which makes light of paedophilia (Gary Glitter) and suicide (Chris Benoit).

Two things I regard worse than kidnapping. Assisted kidnapping to be brutally honest.

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