Tennis Weekly Series- Edition 8 (Roger and Mirka special)

With one week of the USO gone this week I am launching a semi-serious edition, but the full categories will be covered next week, with the whole USO being analysed. For now I will have a 'Player of the Week' (so far) and a 'Comedy Sketch' which I hope you like (it is something a bit different anyway )

Player of the Week: Laura Robson
Irrelevant of her results against defending champion Stosur today evening Robson deserves a lot of credit for her incredible results this tournament. For once Murray is not the only singles player holding up the British flag as we are heading into the penultimate Sunday of the tournament.
First up Robson was up against Samantha Crawford, an American wild-card ranked outside the top 300. Robson eased the first set 6-3, but dropped her intensity in the second before eventually sealing it in a tie-break. Next up for Robson was 4 time Grand Slam Kim Cljisters, playing her final tournament. It was a hotly anticipated clash between the young rising star vs the older champion, and it lived up to its billing with both players playing stunning tennis. Both sets went to tie-breakers, and it was the British teenager who proved herself in the bigger moments- unleashing her huge forehand when needed to seal a 7-6 7-6 win!
But then it got even harder for her as she faced former French Open Champion Li Na. Both players were finding it difficult in the conditions, but it was Robson who was more consistent, breaking Na had 5-4 to take the first set. The second set was a topsy turvy battle- but it was the Chinese number 1 who clinched the tie-break to bring it into a decider. However the British youngster sensationally raced away in the 3rd set, sealing it 6-2 to advance into a 4th round of a Grand Slam for the first time.
A cracking effort from the Brit, and whatever happens today, we have seen she has the potential!

Sketch of The Week:
After last week's edition I did some research on Roger Federer, and was surprised to find out that Roger's Public Relations Manager is... Mirka. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mirka_Federer
I think this is a potentially a great advantage to the Federer family. I can imagine Mirka constantly drilling Federer on how to be as PR-savvy as possible, during breakfast, lunch and tea. Sometimes dinner. Maybe Federer only gets dinner if he behaves well and gets PR plus points in interviews
After doing even more investigating, I have uncovered fresh evidence, exclusive to 606v2, of a conversation between Mirka and Roger. The location and date is unknown.

Roger returns home.
Roger: 'Hey honey, how are you doing?
Mirka: (glares) You're not getting dinner tonight.
Roger: Why not? I was looking forward to your special chicken Vindaloo curry and everything. That's what we planned to have every-time I won against a left handed Spaniard, remember?
Mirka: Verdasco doesn't count.
Roger: I don't see why you're so upset. I played really well today, I was hitting my one-handed backhand perfectly all evening!
Mirka: Really? What about 3rd game 2nd set 30-40? What were you aiming for, my head? You nearly blasted Paul Annacone's cap off.
Roger: Oh yeah, that one. I remember that now. It was the wind.
Mirka: (under her breath) Always the wind isn't it.
Roger: Anyway even if I did accidentally strike Paul's 'RF' cap, there are always many spare available on the head of my statue in the living room.
Mirka: Come on Roger, that's not why I am annoyed. Take a look at this! (throws a copy of the Daily Mail in Federer's direction- the headline reads:
GAFFERER- Federer makes big gaffe in interview- Swiss embassy are said to be in shock

Federer: I don't understand. What gaffe.
Mirka: You told Simon Reed that you don't think this is a Golden Era.
Federer: So?
Mirka: Do you understand what you have done! You've destroyed Andrew Castle's livelihood for a month. And what random meaningless cliché is John Lloyd going to repeat now? You've rendered him useless. BBC producers are tearing their hair out.
Federer: Yes, but don't you know about the new rule. Only if Ljubicic is in the Top 10 it is golden era.
Mirka: But what about the great Juan Monaco?!? (points to a picture of Juan Monaco in the projection of ATP ranking page)
Federer: (under his breath) Who cares about Juan the weaponless?
Anyway we all know that now Nadal is absent, the path is clear. I don't have to tank MPs against Djokovic any-more, I am a free man!
(Baby twins start crying as soon as they hear the word 'Nadal')
Mirka: Roger, what have you done?
How many times do I have to tell you not to mention he-who-must-not-be-named in front of the kids?
(Stanislas Wawrinka, Federer's permanent babysitter rushes in, with a concerned look on his face)
Stan: What's going on? I put them to bed hours ago.
Mirka looks solemnly at Wawrinka, at points to a scar on Roger's knee which he obtained after falling over against Nadal in a gruelling 4 setter in the French Open 2006 final.
'The name of the Dark Lord has been spoken.'

Wawrinka nods in agreement, then takes out a photo from his purse.
Roger: OK, what is going on here?
The picture is a snap-shot of Andy Roddick fluffing a volley set point up in Set 2 of the Wimbledon 2009 final. Wawrinka shows it to the twins, who immediately stop crying.
Stan: OK, I have to go to sleep now. I have an early match against Dolgopolov, and if win that then I am just a sniff away of achieving my dream of losing to Roger in an US Open final!
Roger: (laughs) There's more chance of Nadal beating me on indoor hard than there is of you reaching the final here.
(Twins start crying again)
Mirka: Oh Roger, when will you learn?

IMBL

May i suggest that you add some comment regarding Tomic-Roddick in this conversation. It would be a good addition, IMO.

Roddick and Federer being good friends and Roddick retiring before Federer, and all that.

laverfan wrote:May i suggest that you add some comment regarding Tomic-Roddick in this conversation. It would be a good addition, IMO.

Roddick and Federer being good friends and Roddick retiring before Federer, and all that.

OK I'll try and think of something

I've read all your columns IMBL but I don't think I've ever said "Well done", so well done and a good read.

A great read as always IMBL

Thanks Carrieg, TSJ

I tried something a bit different this week, partly because we're half-way through a tournament, and partly because I have been reading Lydian's posts about how variety is essential in this day and age

Good article, not least the write-up on Laura's amazing week

Laura has done superbly well, even if she falls at the next, very difficult hurdle. It's great to see her 'coming of age' in the big bad world of the main tour after those heady days at junior Wimbledon, which all now seems such a long time ago. Not all junior champs make a successful transition of course, so here's hoping it's onwards & upwards for young Ms. Robson ......

Entertaining stuff re goings-on in the Federer household. I was going to say pity no mention of the (very sweet-looking) twins - but then again at such a tender age they have a right to privacy. I'm pretty certain they'll be targetted by the paparazzi in years to come, but happily that's some way off for now.

Something tells me that for a man of RF's tastes, his favourite dish is likely to be a little more sophisticated than chicken vindaloo curry. But that apart, I have absolutely no reason to doubt the authenticity of the conversation ; indeed the minute I saw mention of the Daily Mail .... well, that alone convinced me it was all totally reliable ......

Thanks Lags

I can confirm that the twins were playing in the playroom with Roddick bunnies.

Ditto from me up until the mockumentary mirka - roger chit-chat which didn't do it for me [just a personal opinion].

Yeah, good article IMBL but the Roger/Mirka bit just didn't do it for me either I'm afraid - not topical or satirical enough. Though did like the 'left handed Spaniard - not Verdasco' line.

Now, I forget who introduced me to PseudoFed on this forum, but even as a great TMF fan, this really is satire that makes me laugh, check the latest two offerings:

http://pseudofedblog.com/

tp : with so much rubbish to be found on the web these days (never from me of course .... ) I don't always bother to follow up unfamiliar links, but given your fine posting record I was tempted by this one.

That pseudofedblog really is very funny. So far I've just speed-read the latest piece on Andy R's retirement, but I'll go back and check out more later.

I think the author is overly harsh on Fed's standard of English, we all know it's way better than that ; but equally I can fully understand why they throw in the quirky expressions and minor linguistic 'mistakes' because it helps create a certain context.

Especially liked the line everybody looks young to the GOAT .....

Good stuff, many thanks

TP, NS: I have now changed the ending

It Must Be Love wrote:TP, NS: I have now changed the ending

Yes, thank you for your pms but I had seen. You really don't need my affirmation because, as I replied to you, humour is a subjective not objective thing and we don't always 'get' each others attempts.

I don't quite think you have understood how satire exaggerates perceived personality traits for comedic effect - I love your summing up of the week's tennis and the quote of the week etc, even if I might sometimes disagree with the odd thing, but I don't think being funny is necessarily your forte, but hey who am I to say? There are probably many on this forum who find it hysterically funny.

No worries TP

IMBL - I too have always (as I think you know) regarded your 'normal' weekly reviews as excellent - if fact I'd say outstanding. My thanks again for those, they are really well-written.

But although I did comment earlier that the fantasy Fed stuff was entertaining, I sense, like TP has said, that in general this sort of thing may not quite be your forte.

So if I were to describe the 'Weekly Series' as your 'day job' then I'm tempted to add a familiar bit of advice ; I think you might guess what that advice could be (!!), but given that you're always happy to take feedback, I'm sure you wouldn't be offended .....

Personally I thought it was really funny- especially the bit with Wawrinka's dream being reaching the final and losing to Roger!

I'd like to nominate foggy and Roddick for point of the week. After a 20 plus shot ralley foggy gets lobbed and pulls out a tweener from 10 feet behind the baseline and pulled wide as well. He nearly pulls off a ridiculous cross court pass that forced Roddick to make a nice stretch stab volley to save the point. Afterwards he jokingly launched the racquet and the balls towards his opponent. It was a great point he almost pulled off the best looking tweener I have ever seen. Credit to Roddick if like most players he just sauntered up there when Foggy had his back to net he would have gotten passed by a wonder shot.

Nice win for Kolshcreiber who played the perfect match in beating Isner and knocking him out. Kolby really exposed Isner's movement with a steady assault of angled chips, drop shots, and up the line shots off both wings. The match lasted 3 and half hours but Kolby made it feel like 5 hours. Stunned to hear that this was kolby's first top ten victory, very surprising for a player of his talent.

socal1976 wrote:I'd like to nominate foggy and Roddick for point of the week. After a 20 plus shot ralley foggy gets lobbed and pulls out a tweener from 10 feet behind the baseline and pulled wide as well. He nearly pulls off a ridiculous cross court pass that forced Roddick to make a nice stretch stab volley to save the point. Afterwards he jokingly launched the racquet and the balls towards his opponent. It was a great point he almost pulled off the best looking tweener I have ever seen. Credit to Roddick if like most players he just sauntered up there when Foggy had his back to net he would have gotten passed by a wonder shot.

Nice win for Kolshcreiber who played the perfect match in beating Isner and knocking him out. Kolby really exposed Isner's movement with a steady assault of angled chips, drop shots, and up the line shots off both wings. The match lasted 3 and half hours but Kolby made it feel like 5 hours. Stunned to hear that this was kolby's first top ten victory, very surprising for a player of his talent.

The 'point of the week' is a good idea. Perhaps I would be able to include it in future using Youtube links.

socal1976 wrote:Stunned to hear that this was kolby's first top ten victory, very surprising for a player of his talent.

He beat Nadal at Halle this year, so if it's his "first top ten victory" they must be referring to at the USO or something. I agree that he's a talented and thoughtful all-round player, he just does not have the weapons to lift him into the top echelons.

barrystar wrote:

socal1976 wrote:Stunned to hear that this was kolby's first top ten victory, very surprising for a player of his talent.

He beat Nadal at Halle this year, so if it's his "first top ten victory" they must be referring to at the USO or something. I agree that he's a talented and thoughtful all-round player, he just does not have the weapons to lift him into the top echelons.

Its weird though when I think about kolby he does seem to have a lot of weapons. He has a great one handed backhand, good volleys, and a very nice serve that for a little guy he can get into the high 120s. But I do agree with you on the forehand he lacks a little weight and pace on the forehand when compared to the guys that make up the ranks above him. He really schooled poor Isner in that match. He was yanking him up in the court and from side to side. That is what I meant by Kolby making John feel like he played 5 hours, his legs were gone as was his patience from side to side. I always love it when varied and guileful tennis beats the route 1 power servers and kolby put on a clinic.