Friday Fun - Boxing Limericks

First topic message reminder :

Windy, you got there first,son
In the moment I had rehearsed one
My, you're quick off the wrist
There's a long waiting list

Guys ,I don't think my presence here
You have presence ?Your birthday?Three cheers!
Many happy returns
And some Chinese burns

Guys ,I don't think my presence here
You have presence ?Your birthday?Three cheers!
Many happy returns
And some Chinese burns
Some crackers, and maybe a beer

The "phantom punch", real or pretend?

The "phantom punch", real or pretend?
The second fight did nothing to mend

The "phantom punch", real or pretend?
The second fight did nothing to mend
The bruised reputation

The "phantom punch", real or pretend?
The second fight did nothing to mend
The bruised reputation
A skeptical nation

The "phantom punch", real or pretend?
The second fight did nothing to mend
The bruised reputation
A skeptical nation
Were far from convinced, at the end

A sensible on-topic effort

A sensible on-topic effort
Concerning the case of the ref hurt

A sensible on-topic effort
Concerning the case of the ref hurt
By the furore that followed

A sensible on-topic effort
Concerning the case of the ref hurt
By the furore that followed
'Bout his tongue, which he swallowed

......

A sensible on-topic effort
Concerning the case of the ref hurt
By the furore that followed
'Bout his tongue, which he swallowed
There was bedlam, such as even the deaf heard.

'Twas enquired of Mrs Froch, while at Twitter

'Twas enquired of Mrs Froch, while at Twitter
Whether Carl ever got annoyed and hit 'er

'Twas enquired of Mrs Froch, while at Twitter
Whether Carl ever got annoyed and hit 'er
Well done again

'Twas enquired of Mrs Froch, while at Twitter
Whether Carl ever got annoyed and hit 'er
Well done again
Her voice is a pain

Union Cane wrote:'Twas enquired of Mrs Froch, while at Twitter
Whether Carl ever got annoyed and hit 'er
Well done again
Her voice is a pain

But you know you'd still do'er up the shi...

So Ali reminds D4 of Manny

Union Cane wrote:So Ali reminds D4 of Manny

And so does my neighbour's friend's granny,

So Ali reminds D4 of Manny
And so does my neighbour's friend's granny,
it's like a wizards sleeve

So Ali reminds D4 of Manny
And so does my neighbour's friend's granny,
it's like a wizards sleeve,
must be seen to believe,

So Ali reminds D4 of Manny
And so does my neighbour's friend's granny,
it's like a wizards sleeve,
must be seen to believe,
her mange ridden wrinkly old fanny.

So Ali reminds D4 of Manny
And so does my neighbour's friend's granny,
it's like a wizards sleeve,
must be seen to believe,
Inside it she could hide a Pakistani

Which brings us to the subject of Bin Laden

Which brings us to the subject of Bin Laden
Who we're told is rather a bad 'un.

Which brings us to the subject of Bin Laden
Who we're told is rather a bad 'un
By 'is' you mean 'was'?

Which brings us to the subject of Bin Laden
Who we're told is rather a bad 'un
By 'is' you mean 'was'?
He's dead, is because

Which brings us to the subject of Bin Laden
Who we're told is rather a bad 'un
By 'is' you mean 'was'?
He's dead, is because
Shouldn't have burnt all his trash in the garden.

Which brings us to the subject of Bin Laden
Who we're told is rather a bad 'un
By 'is' you mean 'was'?
He's dead, is because
Wlad caught him scuttling Hayden

McCallum, the feared ' Body Snatcher '

McCallum, the feared ' Body Snatcher '
Underrated, even by boxing nut Maggie Thatcher

McCallum, the feared ' Body Snatcher '
Underrated, even by boxing nut Maggie Thatcher
While her husband, Denis

McCallum, the feared ' Body Snatcher '
Underrated, even by boxing nut Maggie Thatcher
While her husband, Denis
Spent the last of his pennies

McCallum, the feared ' Body Snatcher '
Underrated, even by boxing nut Maggie Thatcher
While her husband, Denis
Spent the last of his pennies
On a hitman, in a bid to dispatch her.

McCallum, the feared ' Body Snatcher '
Underrated, even by boxing nut Maggie Thatcher
While her husband, Denis
Spent the last of his pennies
Todays politicians just can't match 'er

How I yearn for the nineteen eighties

How I yearn for the nineteen eighties
When I used to go round to Katie's

How I yearn for the nineteen eighties
When I used to go round to Katie's
Watching Leonard/Duran and Hagler/Hearns

How I yearn for the nineteen eighties
When I used to go round to Katie's
Watching Leonard/Duran and Hagler/Hearns
All of the twists and the turns

How I yearn for the nineteen eighties
When I used to go round to Katie's
Watching Leonard/Duran and Hagler/Hearns
All of the twists and the turns
Enjoying the fights with me mateys!

In a public toilet I saw Junior Witter

In a public toilet I saw Junior Witter
Who was eating a pineapple fritter

In a public toilet I saw Junior Witter
Who was eating a pineapple fritter
Wait! It's one of those yellow urinal cubes!

In a public toilet I saw Junior Witter
Who was eating a pineapple fritter
Wait! It's urinal cubes!
Covered in pubes

In a public toilet I saw Junior Witter
Who was eating a pineapple fritter
Wait! It's urinal cubes!
Covered in pubes
Quick, take a picture and post it on Twitter!

Good lord, you should see this photo on Twitter!

Good lord, you should see this photo on Twitter!
Of a strange looking photon emitter

Good lord, you should see this photo on Twitter!
Of a strange looking photon emitter
I've been left behind

Good lord, you should see this photo on Twitter!
Of a strange looking photon emitter
I've been left behind
And so I'm inclined