Friday Fun - Boxing Limericks

First topic message reminder :

Windy, you got there first,son
In the moment I had rehearsed one
My, you're quick off the wrist
There's a long waiting list

Tyson Fury, the totemic gypsy
Complained that he was somewhat tipsy

Tyson Fury, the totemic gypsy
Complained that he was somewhat tipsy
You mean he is no fit state to tarmac my drive?

Tyson Fury, the totemic gypsy
Complained that he was somewhat tipsy
You mean he is no fit state to tarmac my drive?
Youl never get off his council estate alive

Tyson Fury, the totemic gypsy
Complained that he was somewhat tipsy
You mean he is no fit state to tarmac my drive?
Youl never get off his council estate alive
The third and fourth lines should have two feet of three syllables, dipsy.

Apologies Union I am only beginning,

Apologies Union I am only beginning,
Said sheng, while secretly grinning

Apologies Union I am only beginning,
Said sheng, while secretly grinning
I'm stealing this line

Apologies Union I am only beginning,
Said sheng, while secretly grinning
I'm stealing this line
I'm snorting mine

Apologies Union I am only beginning,
Said sheng, while secretly grinning
I'm stealing this line
I'm snorting mine
I'll forgive all this amphibrachic sinning

Remember the time Union said Harrison would beat Haye,

Remember the time Union said Harrison would beat Haye,
And we all wondered what he had been smoking that day,

Remember the time Union said Harrison would beat Haye,
And we all wondered what he had been smoking that day,
It was a rather curious pick and we were surprised to see him backing against the heavy favourite

Remember the time Union said Harrison would beat Haye,
And we all wondered what he had been smoking that day,
Wouldn't mind some of that

Remember the time Union said Harrison would beat Haye,
And we all wondered what he had been smoking that day,
It was a rather curious pick and we were surprised to see him backing against the heavy favourite.
Wouldn't mind some of that.
But if Audley'd have won I'd have been right, wouldn't I, hey?

The mystery of Imogen's bangers

The mystery of Imogen's bangers
Like two zeppelins let out of their hangars

The mystery of Imogen's bangers
Like two zeppelins let out of their hangars
Is hot on the street

The mystery of Imogen's bangers
Like two zeppelins let out of their hangars
Is hot on the street
and a well known treat

The mystery of Imogen's bangers
Like two zeppelins let out of their hangars
Is hot on the street
And a well known treat
Though Ryan is ashamed of his clangers

Have we now seen the last of Roy Jones?

Have we now seen the last of Roy Jones?
Unless someone produces some clones

Have we now seen the last of Roy Jones?
Unless someone produces some clones.
Gone is the speed.

Have we now seen the last of Roy Jones?
Unless someone produces some clones.
Gone is the speed.
Which, opponents agreed

Have we now seen the last of Roy Jones?
Unless someone produces some clones.
Gone is the speed.
Which, opponents agreed
helped them shake him down to the bones.....

'Generation' : not easily defined

'Generation' : not easily defined
Even for those so inclined

'Generation' : not easily defined
Even for those so inclined.
It all bored me senseless

'Generation' : not easily defined
Even for those so inclined.
It all bored me senseless
And left us defenceless

'Generation' : not easily defined
Even for those so inclined.
It all bored me senseless
And left us defenceless
To the joy of absurdity you're blind

So the end of the world didnt happen,

So the end of the world didnt happen,
I was scared, in my kegs I was crappin'

So the end of the world didnt happen,
I was scared, in my kegs I was crappin'
Wish i'd not sold my house

So the end of the world didnt happen,
I was scared, in my kegs I was crappin'
Wish i'd not sold my house
For a bottle of Famous Grouse

So the end of the world didnt happen,
I was scared, in my kegs I was crappin'
Wish i'd not sold my house
For a bottle of Famous Grouse
Or agreed for the missus to utilise a strap on

David Haye wont shake the magic hand,

David Haye wont shake the magic hand,
Or bow to a Klitschko demand,

David Haye wont shake the magic hand,
Or bow to a Klitschko demand,
All of which pains

David Haye wont shake the magic hand,
Or bow to a Klitschko demand,
All of which pains
The man from Ukraine's

David Haye wont shake the magic hand,
Or bow to a Klitschko demand,
All of which pains
The man from Ukraine's
Erstwhile Soviet land

Iron Mike man handles pigeons,

Iron Mike man handles pigeons,
And often changes religions

Iron Mike man handles pigeons,
And often changes religions
He has golden teeth,

Iron Mike man handles pigeons,
And often changes religions
He has golden teeth,
From a dentist called Keith

Iron Mike man handles pigeons,
And often changes religions
He has golden teeth,
From a dentist called Keith,
Who now fits modern integrated kitchens

Nathan Cleverly's headwear

Nathan Cleverly's headwear
Has put his neck in some despair,

Nathan Cleverly's headwear
Is perfect for those cursed with red hair

Nathan Cleverly's headwear
Has put his neck in some despair,
Two dangly bits

Nathan Cleverly's headwear
Has put his neck in some despair,
Two dangly bits
Mistaken for jubblies

Nathan Cleverly's headwear
Has put his neck in some despair,
Two dangly bits
Mistaken for t i t s
He looks like a prat, don't he care?