The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon 09 Feb 2015, 10:07 am

First topic message reminder :

Once I caught a fish alive.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:39 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Union Cane wrote:Johnson ain't camp, he has the manliest voice in the world.

Do you have the TV on at work or are you at home? I can't keep up...

His M*n-Bag is awful. It's just a massive holdall and he's given it a fancy name to sell it. "Performance Bag"? F*ck off, Johnson. He may have a manly voice but he is still camp.

At work. Do you think I sit watching Bloomberg when I'm at home? Jesus Christ, Union. Give me some credit.

That's the problem with you city spivs - always trying to get something on credit. It's people like you that caused the financial crisis.

Very good, Jules. Very good indeed.

Don't call me a spiv though. That hurts.

Fair enough.
Spiv (noun) - a man, typically a flashy dresser, who makes a living by disreputable dealings.

There's no way the middle part describes you.

You're right, I would say I am more a snazzy dresser rather than flashy. Flashy would be lurid watches and winklepicker shoes.

Not classy jumper and shirt combos.

by **Pal Joey** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:41 am

rick_dagless wrote:Morning Union, late start for everyone, not even a sign from the antipodes...

I can safely report another magic day in the Colonies.

This one was special though.

Think I saw a brief glimpse of the future where the trials of today were seen to be totally insignificant.
It's a great kind of feeling... getting it all in perspective and suddenly the abundance of opportunity arises and you can see a clear pathway ahead.
The key is not to worry about anything right now and to let it all go (although you still can worry about real things... and not let some things go).

It was like some unexpected burden lifted up off'of-a-me.

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:42 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:At work. Do you think I sit watching Bloomberg when I'm at home? Jesus Christ, Union. Give me some credit.

Sorry but if you're at work and the telly is on, it's not work. You're probably in a care home or something.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:44 am

Union Cane wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:At work. Do you think I sit watching Bloomberg when I'm at home? Jesus Christ, Union. Give me some credit.

Sorry but if you're at work and the telly is on, it's not work. You're probably in a care home or something.

There is no sound on.

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:47 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Union Cane wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:At work. Do you think I sit watching Bloomberg when I'm at home? Jesus Christ, Union. Give me some credit.

Sorry but if you're at work and the telly is on, it's not work. You're probably in a care home or something.

There is no sound on.

Perhaps you are deaf?

by kingraf Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:47 am

We've got like five telly's on at the moment. Bloomberg, CNN, Sky, ANN7 and Supersport.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:49 am

Union Cane wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Union Cane wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:At work. Do you think I sit watching Bloomberg when I'm at home? Jesus Christ, Union. Give me some credit.

Sorry but if you're at work and the telly is on, it's not work. You're probably in a care home or something.

There is no sound on.

Perhaps you are deaf?

Nope. I can hear lots of people shouting.

Old people asking for bedpans.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:50 am

kingraf wrote:We've got like five telly's on at the moment. Bloomberg, CNN, Sky, ANN7 and Supersport.

For the sake of f*ck.

Is it 5 or just like 5. What, 3? 4? What is it?

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:51 am

We have "Made in Leeds" the new local channel for the Aire Valley...

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 10:55 am

Turns out we're all actually in care homes, blissfully thinking that we have free will and are gainfully employed.

Apart from me, unless I'm in one where we're not allowed a telly.

by kingraf Tue 10 Feb 2015, 11:08 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
kingraf wrote:We've got like five telly's on at the moment. Bloomberg, CNN, Sky, ANN7 and Supersport.

For the sake of f*ck.

Is it 5 or just like 5. What, 3? 4? What is it?

Having had to count, we have seven in my workspace.

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 11:09 am

kingraf wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
kingraf wrote:We've got like five telly's on at the moment. Bloomberg, CNN, Sky, ANN7 and Supersport.

For the sake of f*ck.

Is it 5 or just like 5. What, 3? 4? What is it?

Having had to count, we have seven in my workspace.

Wow, you have like seven tellies dude.

by Guest Tue 10 Feb 2015, 11:16 am

Think I speak for Tina when he says PHUCK the lot of you.

You're being, like, totally mean to him and stuff?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 11:24 am

DAVE667 wrote:Think I speak for Tina when he says PHUCK the lot of you.

You're being, like, totally mean to him and stuff?

Water off a black headed gulls back, David.

by Rowley Tue 10 Feb 2015, 11:36 am

I just want it noting I have been particularly nice to Tina today. I said I would love to meet him, even moreso than I would Galted. I even failed to rise to his considerable baiting over man bags. I struggle to imagine what more I could do.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 11:39 am

Rowley wrote:I just want it noting I have been particularly nice to Tina today. I said I would love to meet him, even moreso than I would Galted. I even failed to rise to his considerable baiting over man bags. I struggle to imagine what more I could do.

You really did. It was impressive restraint as it was a sustained attack over many posts and including a direct insult. You did well.

You have, in the past, been one of the ringleaders though so lets not pretend you're an innocent party.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 11:42 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

You really did. It was impressive restraint as it was a sustained attack over many post and including a direct insult. You did well.

Or he realises that people (wearing sh!t jersey/shirt combos) in glasshouses shouldn't throw stones?

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:21 pm

Shall we have a Fantasy Football update?

I currently have 1094 points and am lining up as follows...

Begovic

Mertesacker
Ivanovic
Clyne

Di Maria
Cuadrado
Fabregas
Elia

Aguero
Kane (c)
Bony

Bench - Baird, Bruce, Albrighton

by **superflyweight** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:28 pm

That's a bit sh1t. I currently have 1095 points.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:30 pm

My line up is as follows:

Grobbelaar

Black headed gull
~~Tony Adams~~ Jimmy Nail
Bobby Moore

Darren Anderton
Sophie Anderton
Kenny Anderson
Angry Anderson

Ian Rush
Gary Lineker
Roald Dahl

Bench - press, mark and JuliusHMarx.

Zero points so far.

by **superflyweight** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:38 pm

Tina you idiot - Rush and Lineker could never have played together. They'd be getting in each other's way.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:40 pm

superflyweight wrote:Tina you idiot - Rush and Lineker could never have played together. They'd be getting in each other's way.

That's why I have no points.

I was hoping Dahl would drift into the hole and play some incisive through balls but it hasn't really worked out.

I might get Rush out and bring in Michelle Obama.

by **superflyweight** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:47 pm

Dahl was about 6 foot 6 - you'd be better sticking him up top and getting Eliane Page out wide to whip crosses in on top of the keeper.

by Guest Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:51 pm

You'd be better off with Sophie Dahl although her fitness couldn't be guaranteed (fat chick who went thin and back again I think)

Anyone removing Ian Rush from their team is dead to me...figuratively...at least until I track you down.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 12:55 pm

DAVE667 wrote:You'd be better off with Sophie Dahl although her fitness couldn't be guaranteed (fat chick who went thin and back again I think)

Anyone removing Ian Rush from their team is dead to me...figuratively...at least until I track you down.

I may have told you this before, DAVID, but Ian Rush came to my old school and addressed us in morning assembly.

by **superflyweight** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:04 pm

Does "address" mean the same thing as it did at sean's school?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:06 pm

superflyweight wrote:Does "address" mean the same thing as it did at sean's school?

We didn't have schools like Sean's in Runcorn.

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:14 pm

"Hello boys, I'm Ian Rush. Drink your milk, and don't move to Italy as it is like living in a foreign country."

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:14 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:Does "address" mean the same thing as it did at sean's school?

We didn't have schools in Runcorn.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:15 pm

Union Cane wrote:"Hello boys, I'm Ian Rush. Drink your milk, and don't move to Italy as it is like living in a foreign country."

There were girls at our school as well.

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:17 pm

"Hello boys and girls, I'm Ian Rush. Drink your milk, and don't move to Italy as it is like living in a foreign country."

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:20 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Union Cane wrote:"Hello boys, I'm Ian Rush. Drink your milk, and don't move to Italy as it is like living in a foreign country."

There were girls at our school as well.

We had birds in the 6th form. Nobbed 4 of them and snogged another 4. There was one that got away though, reckon i'd have married her if i hadn't got pi55ed at the founder's dinner. Was on a high though, had just put 4 past the biology teacher in our 5-1 victory over the staff.

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:24 pm

by Rowley Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:26 pm

Yeah well I went down there the first day it opened right, and I did a couple of laps, I pulled over, the bloke that runs the thing comes over and said - Oi no professionals. I took my helmet off, I said I'm not a professional. He said - you're not a profesional? I said - No, he said - well you should be, if I was you I'd take up Formula One, and if you drive like that you'd probably be the best in the country! I said - I'm not interested I'm making Poopie loads out of computers.

The above post is obviously beneath me.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:27 pm

Union Cane wrote:

True, first was a bit scrappy but the remaining 3 were good strikes.

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:30 pm

Scrappy, you say?

I'm convinced.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:31 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:Does "address" mean the same thing as it did at sean's school?

We didn't have schools in Runcorn.

I just had a look at my old school. It came 2150 out of 3079 in the Merseyside and Cheshire region in 2014. Comfortably in mid-table.

Although amusingly, I just looked on street view at my old road in the town. There is a blue van parked there that I think was there throughout the 90's. It doesn't look like it's moved since about 1985.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:36 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:Does "address" mean the same thing as it did at sean's school?

We didn't have schools in Runcorn.

I just had a look at my old school. It came 2150 out of 3079 in the Merseyside and Cheshire region in 2014. Comfortably in mid-table.

Although amusingly, I just looked on street view at my old road in the town. There is a blue van parked there that I think was there throughout the 90's. It doesn't look like it's moved since about 1985.

Mine came 200th in the National Independant Schools list.

by **superflyweight** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:39 pm

but top for latent homosexuality masquerading as rampant heterosexuality.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:39 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:Does "address" mean the same thing as it did at sean's school?

We didn't have schools in Runcorn.

I just had a look at my old school. It came 2150 out of 3079 in the Merseyside and Cheshire region in 2014. Comfortably in mid-table.

Although amusingly, I just looked on street view at my old road in the town. There is a blue van parked there that I think was there throughout the 90's. It doesn't look like it's moved since about 1985.

Mine came 200th in the National Independant Schools list.

Yeah but does your street have a blue van from 1985 on it?

by **superflyweight** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:43 pm

That van will have a blood stained mattress in the back

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:44 pm

superflyweight wrote:That van will have a blood stained mattress in the back

Not sure Dave has ever been to Runcorn.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:45 pm

It had a disused caravan parked in a spinney where we used go for a smoke. Legend had it that a bloke a few years older than us did one of the geek birds and she bled everywhere. Too much?

As an aside I have a tip for the 2pm at Southwell today. Dead cert according to the trainer.....

by **Union Cane** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:46 pm

Amusingly, I just street viewed the flats I used to live in and there is a bloke walking down the road with blue clothes on!

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@53.571249,-0.080898,3a,15y,99.02h,82.21t/data=!3m4!1e1!3m2!1sD2oXeStuPe7yS-EWKVQHCQ!2e0

by kingraf Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:47 pm

Actually afraid to see how well my school did last year. They started allowing proletarian kids a few years ago. Peasants are never good for overall results

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:48 pm

Union Cane wrote:Amusingly, I just street viewed the flats I used to live in and there is a bloke walking down the road with blue clothes on!

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@53.571249,-0.080898,3a,15y,99.02h,82.21t/data=!3m4!1e1!3m2!1sD2oXeStuPe7yS-EWKVQHCQ!2e0

Do you know him?

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 1:59 pm

Cool story...

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 2:15 pm

phucking hell. never believe a tipster

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 10 Feb 2015, 3:17 pm

I wrote a quiz which I presented last Friday
Round 1 - Hello
1. What is the world’s most populous city?
2. Who was the England cricket captain when they regained the Ashes in 2005, after 18 years?
3. Brown University, Columbia University, Cornell University, Dartmouth College, Harvard University, Princeton University, the University of Pennsylvania, and Yale University are collectively known as what?
4. Who played Bobby Ewing in Dallas?
5. What is 100 degrees Celsius in Fahrenheit?
6. In old money, how many shillings were in a crown?
7. Who wrote the plays ‘Man and Superman’ and ‘Pygmalion’?
8. For one point each, who held the world long jump record from 1968 to 1991 and who broke that record in 1991, and is still the world record holder?
9. In the National Lottery, how much do you win for 3 matching numbers?
10. Which member of Boyzone also starred in Coronation Street?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Feb 2015, 3:21 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:
2. Who was the England cricket captain when they regained the Ashes in 2005, after 18 years?

Michael Vaughan.

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