The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by Alistair Wed Sep 09, 2015 3:00 pm

First topic message reminder :

Rowley wrote:Why yes, Alistair, upon reflection I do believe i have been somewhat ignorant and uneducated in my stance on JFK and it is possible there was more than one shooter.

Thanks.

by Adam D Fri Sep 18, 2015 4:58 pm

Done

by **ShahenshahG** Fri Sep 18, 2015 5:04 pm

Thanks I feel a part of the family now providing that everyone agrees that Sean is adopted.

by Guest Fri Sep 18, 2015 7:35 pm

Rowley wrote:Is Suicide Bummer offensive?

Also apt given his 2" long, 5 second fuse. L

by **ShahenshahG** Fri Sep 18, 2015 8:03 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Rowley wrote:Is Suicide Bummer offensive?
Also apt given his 2" long, 5 second fuse. L

If you hadn't bitten the other 8 inches off it would be a 25 second fuse.

by **Galted** Sat Sep 19, 2015 10:35 am

Not looking forward to the rest of the rugby world cup if last night was anything to go by.

John Inverdale to start with, then 40-50 minutes of Galtova complaining how boring it is, then 10 minutes of Jack the beardy f*ckface Whitehall trying to be funny with England has-beens, then another 40-50 minutes of Galtova complaining it's boring and poking me in the face and chest, all rounded off by John f*cking Inverdale.

The only highlight was going onto the rugby forum to read the continual whining and arguing about irrelevant moments and decisions and non-incidents.

by **seanmichaels** Sat Sep 19, 2015 10:27 pm

John inverdale has a potty mouth in real life

by **seanmichaels** Sat Sep 19, 2015 10:29 pm

I'd quite like to bum the European solheim cup team

by **Galted** Sat Sep 19, 2015 10:59 pm

There must be an available pun about getting it into the hole or about how they could form a 9-hole course themselves but I'm no Julius H Marx when it comes to such things.

by **seanmichaels** Sat Sep 19, 2015 11:29 pm

They could albatoss me off any day of the week.

by **JuliusHMarx** Sun Sep 20, 2015 10:58 am

Galted wrote:There must be an available pun about getting it into the hole or about how they could form a 9-hole course themselves but I'm no Julius H Marx when it comes to such things.

I'm sure you'll find a good golf pun Galted - just keep chipping away.

by **Galted** Sun Sep 20, 2015 11:20 am

Thanks for the support, Julius, but I'm still a fairway from my first good golf pun.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon Sep 21, 2015 8:27 am

What the fist?
Where is everyone?

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 8:33 am

I was thinking the same but didn't want to be fist.

by **JuliusHMarx** Mon Sep 21, 2015 8:35 am

Don't blame you sean. Being fist carries with it it's own unique pressure.

by Guest Mon Sep 21, 2015 8:39 am

Sean is cripplingly aware of the pressures of early morning fistings

by **superflyweight** Mon Sep 21, 2015 8:48 am

He's also acutely aware, just like Cameron, of what it feels like to put his Hampton in a ham.

P.S. on a more serious note - sorry to hear about your mum Dave.

by Guest Mon Sep 21, 2015 8:56 am

Cheers Super.

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:00 am

superflyweight wrote:He's also acutely aware, just like Cameron, of what it feels like to put his Hampton in a ham.

My hampton remains of little use after friday. Had a sniff with a blonde piece who was alright. She approached me at the bar and after a bit of small talk informed me that she had had a sh!t weekend. I said it is only friday? She replied her husband of 11 years had died last year and she had just found out that her new partner had been cheating since the start. Said my goodbyes after that. Also spoke to an ex work colleague who moaned about her bloke for 20 minutes. All in all it was not a night to convince me that women are not mental.

by Alistair Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:05 am

seanmichaels wrote:
superflyweight wrote:He's also acutely aware, just like Cameron, of what it feels like to put his Hampton in a ham.

My hampton remains of little use after friday. Had a sniff with a blonde piece who was alright. She approached me at the bar and after a bit of small talk informed me that she had had a sh!t weekend. I said it is only friday? She replied her husband of 11 years had died last year and she had just found out that her new partner had been cheating since the start. Said my goodbyes after that. Also spoke to an ex work colleague who moaned about her bloke for 20 minutes. All in all it was not a night to convince me that women are not mental.

You let that one go? That had pity f*ck written all over it. Not to mention her self esteem would be at an all time low so she probably would've let you call her 'Jeff' and not questioned it.

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:12 am

Alistair wrote:

You let that one go? That had pity f*ck written all over it. Not to mention her self esteem would be at an all time low so she probably would've let you call her 'Jeff' and not questioned it.

She ticked every box, tallish, blonde, sizeable artillery. There was just something worryingly psychotic about her.

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:13 am

It wouldn't surprise me if she did her husband in.

by Rowley Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:14 am

Morning all, if it makes you feel any better Sean, I got some this weekend.

by **superflyweight** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:15 am

Rowley wrote:Morning all, if it makes you feel any better Sean, I got some this weekend.

I had a terrific ham shank.

by Rowley Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:17 am

I had one of them as well Super. Quality weekend all round.

by Dr Shoe Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:18 am

Sounds like Sean was a Shoe in for some action.

Surprised you didnt go for it. Sleeping next to someone who might stab you must be similar to sleeping next to those Hobos in the local park?

by Dr Shoe Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:19 am

Are we talking food or a good old Jodrell?

by Alistair Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:19 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Alistair wrote:

You let that one go? That had pity f*ck written all over it. Not to mention her self esteem would be at an all time low so she probably would've let you call her 'Jeff' and not questioned it.

She ticked every box, tallish, blonde, sizeable artillery. There was just something worryingly psychotic about her.

I had you down as a risk taker, sean!

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:23 am

Alistair wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Alistair wrote:

You let that one go? That had pity f*ck written all over it. Not to mention her self esteem would be at an all time low so she probably would've let you call her 'Jeff' and not questioned it.

She ticked every box, tallish, blonde, sizeable artillery. There was just something worryingly psychotic about her.

I had you down as a risk taker, sean!

As Richard Ashcroft would say, I've been on the shelf too long. No form or match practice.

House warming party at mates this weekend and his bird wants to set me up with her work colleague. Her vitals look healthy but he warned me that she has mental issues.

by Rowley Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:26 am

seanmichaels wrote: Her vitals look healthy

How is this man still single? Baffling, truly baffling.

by Alistair Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:26 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Alistair wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Alistair wrote:

You let that one go? That had pity f*ck written all over it. Not to mention her self esteem would be at an all time low so she probably would've let you call her 'Jeff' and not questioned it.

She ticked every box, tallish, blonde, sizeable artillery. There was just something worryingly psychotic about her.

I had you down as a risk taker, sean!

As Richard Ashcroft would say, I've been on the shelf too long. No form or match practice.

House warming party at mates this weekend and his bird wants to set me up with her work colleague. Her vitals look healthy but he warned me that she has mental issues.

I think you need to go for this one, sean. Take a risk. Bareback, call her Jeff and say her sister was louder. You need to get back in the game.

by **Pal Joey** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:30 am

Yeah sean, just dive in. Forget about the John Cassavetes method I suggested last week.

If her name's Robin Finch... I always find a pocket of bird seed goes a long way.

by Guest Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:33 am

The Loaded Dog wrote:Yeah sean, just dive in. Forget about the John Cassavetes method I suggested last week.

If her name's Robin Finch... I always find a pocket of bird seed goes a long way.

Would Clarice Starling do?

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:38 am

Rowley wrote:
seanmichaels wrote: Her vitals look healthy

How is this man still single? Baffling, truly baffling.

Just because you got some at the weekend. No need to be condescending.

by Alistair Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:38 am

Rowley wrote:
seanmichaels wrote: Her vitals look healthy

How is this man still single? Baffling, truly baffling.

I had no idea he was a Doctor.

by Rowley Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:39 am

I'm trying to help Sean, genuinely believe eliminating such phrases from your vocabulary might assist you.

by Dr Shoe Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:40 am

Alistair wrote:
Rowley wrote:
seanmichaels wrote: Her vitals look healthy

How is this man still single? Baffling, truly baffling.

I had no idea he was a Doctor.

Only one doctor around these parts

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:42 am

Rowley wrote:I'm trying to help Sean, genuinely believe eliminating such phrases from your vocabulary might assist you.

I am very polite in real life. Helped a blind lady on a train yesterday.

by Alistair Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:44 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Rowley wrote:I'm trying to help Sean, genuinely believe eliminating such phrases from your vocabulary might assist you.

I am very polite in real life. Helped a blind lady on a train yesterday.

I can't help but imagine you as Rik from The Young Ones, being almost genuine, then sniggering 'Helped her get herself off'.

You should take Rowley's advice, sean. He got some this weekend.

by **seanmichaels** Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:45 am

Reckon my ex is getting some as well. Doesn't make her a sage.

by Dr Shoe Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:46 am

If it helps put your mind at rest, she definitely is getting some

by Rowley Mon Sep 21, 2015 9:48 am

Thread split is imminent. Anyone anything witty to offer?

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