Glasgow and Edinburgh: Ongoing Banter Thread X-rated

[funnyExiledScot]

First topic message reminder :

Previously by the same artist:

https://www.606v2.com/t48240-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread
https://www.606v2.com/t51313-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-ii
https://www.606v2.com/t53119-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-iii
https://www.606v2.com/t54519-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-iv
https://www.606v2.com/t55409-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-v-the-fun-continues
https://www.606v2.com/t56913p950-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-vi-banter-boogaloo
https://www.606v2.com/t57946-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-vii
https://www.606v2.com/t58659-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-viii
https://www.606v2.com/t59409p1000-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-ix

Edinburgh

1872 Champions

Glasgow

1872 Runners-up

[George Carlin]

A mate was asking me about the nicknames for the Glasgow team. Could anyone send me a link to an updated 'teamsheet' please ?

I'm not sure that there is one any more. I did one ages ago and then someone accused us of being pretentious for having it in the first place, so it was taken down.

Off the top of my head (and the great unwashed will chip in with any I've forgotton):

Bane - Ryan Grant
Batman - Ryan Wilson
Big Bad Boab - Rob Harley
Big Eck - Alex Dunbar
Big Naka - Leone Nakarawa
Big Tacky - Taqele Naiyaravoro
Bluto - Josh Strauss
Boab - Rob Harley
Bomber - Nathan Bombrys
Buffy's Mate - Zander Fagerson
Dancer - Finn Russell
Didier Hoggba - Stuart Hogg
Flagball - Leone Nakarawa
Fozzy - Chris Fusaro
Furra - Peter Horne
Ginger Tackle Monster - Rob Harley
Henners/Henners Piecrust - Henry Pyrgos
Horney Furra Lineee - Peter Horne
Huge - Hugh Blake
Ickle Jonny - Jonny Gray
Jedi - James Eddie
Jeff Peterson - Greg Peterson
Jerry - Jerry Yanuyanutawa
LittleJon - Jonny Gray
Mister Attitude Problem/Mr AP - Stuart Hogg
Mister Darcy - D'Arcy Rae
New O'Driscoll - Richie Vernon
Schlong - Sean Lamont
Sherlock - Tyrone Holmes
Shrek - Gordon Reid
Suspiciously Old Scott - Scott Wight
Tennessee Tam - Tommy Seymour
The Coo - Michael Cusack
The Centre - Richie Vernon
The Meatball - Duncan Weir
The Messiah - Mark Bennett
The Mighty Coo - Michael Cusack
The Ruck Inspector - Alastair Kellock
The Selkirk Pixie - Lee Jones
Tiny Tim - Tim Swinson
Toonie - Gregor Peter John Townsend
Wee Pee - Pat MacArthur

[jimbopip]

A mate was asking me about the nicknames for the Glasgow team. Could anyone send me a link to an updated 'teamsheet' please ?

I'm not sure that there is one any more. I did one ages ago and then someone accused us of being pretentious for having it in the first place, so it was taken down.

Off the top of my head (and the great unwashed will chip in with any I've forgotton):

Bane - Ryan Grant
Batman - Ryan Wilson
Big Bad Boab - Rob Harley
Big Eck - Alex Dunbar
Big Naka - Leone Nakarawa
Big Tacky - Taqele Naiyaravoro
Bluto - Josh Strauss
Boab - Rob Harley
Bomber - Nathan Bombrys
Buffy's Mate - Zander Fagerson
Dancer - Finn Russell
Didier Hoggba - Stuart Hogg
Flagball - Leone Nakarawa
Fozzy - Chris Fusaro
Furra - Peter Horne
Ginger Tackle Monster - Rob Harley
Henners/Henners Piecrust - Henry Pyrgos
Horney Furra Lineee - Peter Horne
Huge - Hugh Blake
Ickle Jonny - Jonny Gray
Jedi - James Eddie
Jeff Peterson - Greg Peterson
Jerry - Jerry Yanuyanutawa
LittleJon - Jonny Gray
Mister Attitude Problem/Mr AP - Stuart Hogg
Mister Darcy - D'Arcy Rae
New O'Driscoll - Richie Vernon
Schlong - Sean Lamont
Sherlock - Tyrone Holmes
Shrek - Gordon Reid
Suspiciously Old Scott - Scott Wight
Tennessee Tam - Tommy Seymour
The Coo - Michael Cusack
The Centre - Richie Vernon
The Meatball - Duncan Weir
The Messiah - Mark Bennett
The Mighty Coo - Michael Cusack
The Ruck Inspector - Alastair Kellock
The Selkirk Pixie - Lee Jones
Tiny Tim - Tim Swinson
Toonie - Gregor Peter John Townsend
Wee Pee - Pat MacArthur

Aye, but who is the Giant Red Crayon?
also Oscar Peterson, Sandy Lyle,Arthur Ashe, Shuggie B (our favourite hoodie).

Apparently Michael Blair esq calls himself Blade. This is obviously an east coast affectation and is not to be encouraged.
As our favourite clergymen would say, "Down with that sort of thing".

[RDW]

A mate was asking me about the nicknames for the Glasgow team. Could anyone send me a link to an updated 'teamsheet' please ?

I'm not sure that there is one any more. I did one ages ago and then someone accused us of being pretentious for having it in the first place, so it was taken down.

Off the top of my head (and the great unwashed will chip in with any I've forgotton):

Bane - Ryan Grant
Batman - Ryan Wilson
Big Bad Boab - Rob Harley
Big Eck - Alex Dunbar
Big Naka - Leone Nakarawa
Big Tacky - Taqele Naiyaravoro
Bluto - Josh Strauss
Boab - Rob Harley
Bomber - Nathan Bombrys
Buffy's Mate - Zander Fagerson
Dancer - Finn Russell
Didier Hoggba - Stuart Hogg
Flagball - Leone Nakarawa
Fozzy - Chris Fusaro
Furra - Peter Horne
Ginger Tackle Monster - Rob Harley
Henners/Henners Piecrust - Henry Pyrgos
Horney Furra Lineee - Peter Horne
Huge - Hugh Blake
Ickle Jonny - Jonny Gray
Jedi - James Eddie
Jeff Peterson - Greg Peterson
Jerry - Jerry Yanuyanutawa
LittleJon - Jonny Gray
Mister Attitude Problem/Mr AP - Stuart Hogg
Mister Darcy - D'Arcy Rae
New O'Driscoll - Richie Vernon
Schlong - Sean Lamont
Sherlock - Tyrone Holmes
Shrek - Gordon Reid
Suspiciously Old Scott - Scott Wight
Tennessee Tam - Tommy Seymour
The Coo - Michael Cusack
The Centre - Richie Vernon
The Meatball - Duncan Weir
The Messiah - Mark Bennett
The Mighty Coo - Michael Cusack
The Ruck Inspector - Alastair Kellock
The Selkirk Pixie - Lee Jones
Tiny Tim - Tim Swinson
Toonie - Gregor Peter John Townsend
Wee Pee - Pat MacArthur

Aye, but who is the Giant Red Crayon?
also Oscar Peterson, Sandy Lyle,Arthur Ashe, Shuggie B (our favourite hoodie).

Apparently Michael Blair esq calls himself Blade. This is obviously an east coast affectation and is not to be encouraged.
As our favourite clergymen would say, "Down with that sort of thing".

Careful now!

[George Carlin]

https://www.606v2.com/t61108-challenge-cup-pool-5-edinburgh-rugby-v-grenoble-13-november

https://www.606v2.com/t61106-champions-cup-pool-3-racing-92-v-glasgow-warriors-14-november

[RDW]

Good job GC, but we've got a round of Pro 12 games first!

On that note - who is going to step up to the plate and do an Edinburgh - Munster thread?

[George Carlin]

Good job GC, but we've got a round of Pro 12 games first!

On that note - who is going to step up to the plate and do an Edinburgh - Munster thread?

Hopefully we can have a willing volunteer - it's the only one not done this week.

[IanBru]

A mate was asking me about the nicknames for the Glasgow team. Could anyone send me a link to an updated 'teamsheet' please ?

I'm not sure that there is one any more. I did one ages ago and then someone accused us of being pretentious for having it in the first place, so it was taken down.

Off the top of my head (and the great unwashed will chip in with any I've forgotton):

Bane - Ryan Grant
Batman - Ryan Wilson
Big Bad Boab - Rob Harley
Big Eck - Alex Dunbar
Big Naka - Leone Nakarawa
Big Tacky - Taqele Naiyaravoro
Bluto - Josh Strauss
Boab - Rob Harley
Bomber - Nathan Bombrys
Buffy's Mate - Zander Fagerson
Dancer - Finn Russell
Didier Hoggba - Stuart Hogg
Flagball - Leone Nakarawa
Fozzy - Chris Fusaro
Furra - Peter Horne
Ginger Tackle Monster - Rob Harley
Henners/Henners Piecrust - Henry Pyrgos
Horney Furra Lineee - Peter Horne
Huge - Hugh Blake
Ickle Jonny - Jonny Gray
Jedi - James Eddie
Jeff Peterson - Greg Peterson
Jerry - Jerry Yanuyanutawa
LittleJon - Jonny Gray
Mister Attitude Problem/Mr AP - Stuart Hogg
Mister Darcy - D'Arcy Rae
New O'Driscoll - Richie Vernon
Schlong - Sean Lamont
Sherlock - Tyrone Holmes
Shrek - Gordon Reid
Suspiciously Old Scott - Scott Wight
Tennessee Tam - Tommy Seymour
The Coo - Michael Cusack
The Centre - Richie Vernon
The Meatball - Duncan Weir
The Messiah - Mark Bennett
The Mighty Coo - Michael Cusack
The Ruck Inspector - Alastair Kellock
The Selkirk Pixie - Lee Jones
Tiny Tim - Tim Swinson
Toonie - Gregor Peter John Townsend
Wee Pee - Pat MacArthur

Aye, but who is the Giant Red Crayon?
also Oscar Peterson, Sandy Lyle,Arthur Ashe, Shuggie B (our favourite hoodie).

Apparently Michael Blair esq calls himself Blade. This is obviously an east coast affectation and is not to be encouraged.
As our favourite clergymen would say, "Down with that sort of thing".

Careful now!

"Have you got any handcuffs?"
"Handcuffs? What do you need them for?"
"They're for me and Ted."
"You and Father Ted?"
"Yeah, we're just trying something out."

[George Carlin]

So this should be fairly comprehensive:

Arthur - Adam Ashe
Bane - Ryan Grant
Batman - Ryan Wilson
Big Bad Boab - Rob Harley
Big Eck - Alex Dunbar
Big Naka - Leone Nakarawa
Big Tacky - Taqele Naiyaravoro
Bluto - Josh Strauss
Boab - Rob Harley
Bomber - Nathan Bombrys
Buffy's Mate - Zander Fagerson
Dancer - Finn Russell
Didier Hoggba - Stuart Hogg
Flagball - Leone Nakarawa
Fozzy - Chris Fusaro
Furra - Peter Horne
Ginger Tackle Monster - Rob Harley
Henners/Henners Piecrust - Henry Pyrgos
Horney Furra Lineee - Peter Horne
Huge - Hugh Blake
Ickle Jonny - Jonny Gray
Jedi - James Eddie
Jeff Peterson - Greg Peterson
Jerry - Jerry Yanuyanutawa
LittleJon - Jonny Gray
Mister Attitude Problem/Mr AP - Stuart Hogg
Mister Darcy - D'Arcy Rae
New O'Driscoll - Richie Vernon
Oscar Peterson - Greg Peterson
Sandy - Fraser Lyle
Schlong - Sean Lamont
Sherlock - Tyrone Holmes
Shrek - Gordon Reid
Shuggie B - Hugh Blake
Suspiciously Old Scott - Scott Wight
Tennessee Tam - Tommy Seymour
The Coo - Michael Cusack
The Centre - Richie Vernon
The Meatball - Duncan Weir
The Messiah - Mark Bennett
The Mighty Coo - Michael Cusack
The Ruck Inspector - Alastair Kellock
The Selkirk Pixie - Lee Jones
Tiny Tim - Tim Swinson
Toonie - Gregor Peter John Townsend
Wee Pee - Pat MacArthur

[EWT Spoons]

Good job GC, but we've got a round of Pro 12 games first!

On that note - who is going to step up to the plate and do an Edinburgh - Munster thread?

Done

https://www.606v2.com/t61109-pro-12-edinburgh-rugby-vs-munster-7th-november#3196879

[Converter]

That was above and beyond the call, GC. Many thanks for putting that together.

[IanBru]

Excellent list!

Can I suggest a few others?
O.E.D - Sam Johnson
Sick-boy - Gregor Hunter
Centurion - Sean Lamont
Junior - Junior Bulumakau
Horne-dog - Peter Horne
Pythagoras - Henry Pyrgos
Bordello - Will Bordill
Gordie - Gordon Reid
Anagram - Scott Cummings
Sandy - Zander Fagerson (I've heard the players calling him that over the ref-mic)
Winnie the Pooh - Alex Allan

Admittedly, some of these may not be in common usage (we'll refer to Sam Johnson for clarification) except perhaps in my head.

[IanBru]

In other news...
Jonny Gray has just signed a new three-year deal with Glasgow Warriors!
https://twitter.com/GlasgowWarriors/status/661475649320824832

So, in his honour:

[nickj]

Cracking news. Delighted we're keeping our young Scots talent. Onwards and upwards.

[RDW]

Looks like he's planning on solving Glasgow's tighthead problems too!

[George Carlin]

Looks like he's planning on solving Glasgow's tighthead problems too!

That number apparently signifies the number of Edinburgh players Jonny eats for breakfast every morning.

[Tattie Scones RRN]

See FM's been banned for two weeks...

http://www.planetrugby.com/news/two-week-ban-for-mckenzie/

[IanBru]

I always love 'the conduct at the hearing' as a mitigating factor, as though Fraser McKenzie had made a value judgement between being respectful and professional at the hearing or turning up dressed as Heinrich Himmler.

[RDW]

It is a big statement to say it warranted a red card - wonder if there's any footage.

Sounds like a similar type of offence to Hooper's, which was pretty bad, and he only got a 1 week ban!

[Eejit]

So this should be fairly comprehensive:

Arthur - Adam Ashe
Bane - Ryan Grant
Batman - Ryan Wilson
Big Bad Boab - Rob Harley
Big Eck - Alex Dunbar
Big Naka - Leone Nakarawa
Big Tacky - Taqele Naiyaravoro
Bluto - Josh Strauss
Boab - Rob Harley
Bomber - Nathan Bombrys
Buffy's Mate - Zander Fagerson
Dancer - Finn Russell
Didier Hoggba - Stuart Hogg
Flagball - Leone Nakarawa
Fozzy - Chris Fusaro
Furra - Peter Horne
Ginger Tackle Monster - Rob Harley
Henners/Henners Piecrust - Henry Pyrgos
Horney Furra Lineee - Peter Horne
Huge - Hugh Blake
Ickle Jonny - Jonny Gray
Jedi - James Eddie
Jeff Peterson - Greg Peterson
Jerry - Jerry Yanuyanutawa
LittleJon - Jonny Gray
Mister Attitude Problem/Mr AP - Stuart Hogg
Mister Darcy - D'Arcy Rae
New O'Driscoll - Richie Vernon
Oscar Peterson - Greg Peterson
Sandy - Fraser Lyle
Schlong - Sean Lamont
Sherlock - Tyrone Holmes
Shrek - Gordon Reid
Shuggie B - Hugh Blake
Suspiciously Old Scott - Scott Wight
Tennessee Tam - Tommy Seymour
The Coo - Michael Cusack
The Centre - Richie Vernon
The Meatball - Duncan Weir
The Messiah - Mark Bennett
The Mighty Coo - Michael Cusack
The Ruck Inspector - Alastair Kellock
The Selkirk Pixie - Lee Jones
Tiny Tim - Tim Swinson
Toonie - Gregor Peter John Townsend
Wee Pee - Pat MacArthur

That list is cracking. Not pretentious in the slightest. Not sure why people feel the need to try to take part of the fun out of a sport that for us supporters revolves around drinking shed loads of beer and watching big chaps smash each other.

We got one for Big Simone yet? I'd suggest Nina.

[RDW]

Nina - brilliant!

[George Carlin]

Nina - brilliant!

Brilliant - sold.

[RDW]

Ickle Jonny is all grown up - he's been made club captain now too!

[George Carlin]

I get the feeling this might have been one of the key sweeteners for signing a new deal.

Wonder what Josh Strauss makes of that? There must be things in his beard older than Jonny Gray.

[RDW]

I hate to break it to you GC, but Strauss has lost the beard!

https://twitter.com/JoshStrauss1/status/659738278988546048

[George Carlin]

I hate to break it to you GC, but Strauss has lost the beard!

https://twitter.com/JoshStrauss1/status/659738278988546048

What's the world coming to? Hopefully GLove has kept his trainee leprechaun effort?

[IanBru]

Ickle Jonny is all grown up - he's been made club captain now too!

I remember when he was only [jumps up to touch the ceiling] this high...

Sunrise, sunset...

[funnyExiledScot]

I get the feeling this might have been one of the key sweeteners for signing a new deal.

Wonder what Josh Strauss makes of that? There must be things in his beard older than Jonny Gray.

Strauss needs to focus on his game. He can't have been pleased with not making the Scotland XV at the World Cup, especially watching Edinburgh's John Hardie steal the mantle of best "new" Scotsman.

Delighted for Jonny Gray. I thought he and his brother excelled at the World Cup and they have the potential to be one of the great lock pairings, certainly for Scotland. Wonderful that Cotter brought Hines on board to help them as well.

Glasgow and Scotland are just a much harder team to beat with Jonny Gray in the engine room.

[RDW]

Visser has got off to a good start in the Premiership!

https://youtu.be/Jl5Tn6RODDk

[IanBru]

Did Visser just step Matawalu? It's like that Simpsons episode where they go into Shelbyville to retrieve the stolen lemon tree.

[funnyExiledScot]

Nice run! It must be thrilling for him to be playing for a team which keeps the ball in hand and actually invites it's wingers to attack!

[RDW]

Visser's stats from that game pretty much some him up completely:

Attacking

Runs - 12 (probably more than in entire season under Solomons)

Meters made - 116

Clear breaks - 1

Defenders beaten - 5



But then....

Defending

Turnovers conceded - 2

Tackles made - 3

Tackles missed - 4

[George Carlin]

Apparently when the after-hours staff were cleaning out Visser's locker at Murrayfield, they found this:

[funnyExiledScot]

I wonder how long it'll take the Quins fans to realise what they've bought!!

[RDW]

Given that his barnstorming run, as opposed to his missed tackles, made the headlines they’ll probably be quite pleased with his debut!

[R!skysports]

Visser - McMisser

Please try to use his proper name (it is the only good thing I have ever brought to this board)

[R!skysports]

And isn't this exciting

6 Edinburgh 6 4 0 2 99 85 1 17
7 Glasgow 6 3 0 3 142 128 5 17


Might be the last time we see the Lavender smelling, soft skinned, coiffured, shandy drinking loviess ahead in the league

[Eejit]

Additional pitchside standing at Scotstoun for games against the Luvvies and the Saints.

[George Carlin]

Additional pitchside standing at Scotstoun for games against the Luvvies and the Saints.

So that means some of FES' staff are coming?

[funnyExiledScot]

Additional pitchside standing at Scotstoun for games against the Luvvies and the Saints.

So that means some of FES' staff are coming?

Annual day out. Cheap and cheerful!

[R!skysports]

Additional pitchside standing at Scotstoun for games against the Luvvies and the Saints.

So that means some of FES' staff are coming?

Annual Rugby appreciation day out. Cheap, as no prawns, and cheerful way to see how winning rugby is played!

Fixed

[jimbopip]

Risky
"Cheap, as no prawns" has just entered my lexicon.

[IanBru]

"Richie Vernon is a more successful centre-convert than Sam Burgess."

Discuss.

[jimbopip]

Bru,

"Richie Vernon, the most successful convert since St Paul."

Discuss, but not in a pub on the Byres Road.

[funnyExiledScot]

"Richie Vernon is a more successful centre-convert than Sam Burgess."

Discuss.

Well "Big" Sam Burgess is overrated, whereas no-one has ever rated "Big" Richie V. Tough one.

[jimbopip]

Fes, after the Pro-12 final there were lots of people in Belfast who rated Richie V. You should have been there it was cheap, as no prawns.

[BigGee]

Looks like Glasgow are brewing up a bit of a crisis at Hooker, with only two currently fit, one of whom Malcolm, is an EDP. Two more, who I presume must be Bryce and Scott may also need surgery. They are going to need some more cover and there is talk of it arriving soon before the Euros start. How many hookers do Edinburgh have, is there anyone we can borrow?

On a slightly different tack, I am just back from a trip to France, to go and visit my two daughters both of whom are students there at the moment. One in Bordeaux and one in Montpellier, neither of whom unfortunately are in Glasgow Euro group!

Both lovely cities and both, I feel I have to point out to those that live in Edinburgh, have fantastic tram systems that have been put in relatively recently. Multiple lines, cheap prices, the locals love them and use them and the centre of town is wonderfully free of traffic. It does make you wonder why the Edinburgh planners did not go and visit there counterparts over in France (it would hardly have been arduous!) and fine out how to do it properly. It really is very impressive.

If any of you ever get the chance to go and visit Saint-Emilion in the autumn don't pass up. It is stunningly beautiful and the vino is not bad either. 6000 hectres in rural France with a value probably similar to the centre of London!

[funnyExiledScot]

Nice info BigGee, I'm going to insist that BabyfES goes to uni somewhere cool like that!!

[George Carlin]

BigGee - would you ever consider retiring there?

My wife (French being first language) is currently obsessed with deciding where in France we should retire. Despite the fact that we are probably 20 years away from being able to.

[R!skysports]

Normal service resumed

6 Glasgow 7 4 0 3 177 158 6 22
7 Edinburgh 7 4 0 3 113 101 2 18

Unfortunately, as a slightly slow start from Glasgow - we might not be in a position to 'throw Edinburgh a bone' and allow them some ego boosting 1872 silverware this year

[RDW]

https://www.606v2.com/t61108-challenge-cup-pool-5-edinburgh-rugby-v-grenoble-13-november

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