Glasgow and Edinburgh: Ongoing Banter Thread X-rated

[funnyExiledScot]

First topic message reminder :

Previously by the same artist:

https://www.606v2.com/t48240-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread
https://www.606v2.com/t51313-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-ii
https://www.606v2.com/t53119-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-iii
https://www.606v2.com/t54519-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-iv
https://www.606v2.com/t55409-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-v-the-fun-continues
https://www.606v2.com/t56913p950-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-vi-banter-boogaloo
https://www.606v2.com/t57946-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-vii
https://www.606v2.com/t58659-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-viii
https://www.606v2.com/t59409p1000-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-ix

Edinburgh

1872 Champions

Glasgow

1872 Runners-up

[funnyExiledScot]

Are you Tim Visser?

Yes, you've got me. That's why I tend to chat on here for 75 minutes of every Scotland and Edinburgh game. The rest of the time I'm reaching for an intercept that isn't on, so I can't reach the keyboard.

I'd highly recommend watching a Quins game when you get a chance. The look on Mike Brown's face everytime Visser manages to not be in a position to make the tackle is priceless.

[R!skysports]

Radge - do you and FES want to get a room?

They can use FES's West wing - it is closed for fumigation - I believe a yokel managed to sneak in and steal his quell eggs, rendering the place uninhabitable for Lord FESie

[funnyExiledScot]

Radge - do you and FES want to get a room?

They can use FES's West wing - it is closed for fumigation - I believe a yokel managed to sneak in and steal his quell eggs, rendering the place uninhabitable for Lord FESie

What's a quell egg?

[IanBru]

Radge - do you and FES want to get a room?

They can use FES's West wing - it is closed for fumigation - I believe a yokel managed to sneak in and steal his quell eggs, rendering the place uninhabitable for Lord FESie

What's a quell egg?

I assume it's a kind of Fabergé egg made to celebrate the successful quelling of a revolt.

[funnyExiledScot]

Radge - do you and FES want to get a room?

They can use FES's West wing - it is closed for fumigation - I believe a yokel managed to sneak in and steal his quell eggs, rendering the place uninhabitable for Lord FESie

What's a quell egg?

I assume it's a kind of Fabergé egg made to celebrate the successful quelling of a revolt.

Ah yes, Octopussy. There's a cultural reference I'm comfortable with.

Anyway, I always say that if the staff have time to revolt then they are "doing a Kellock" (i.e. not working hard enough).

[R!skysports]

Radge - do you and FES want to get a room?

They can use FES's West wing - it is closed for fumigation - I believe a yokel managed to sneak in and steal his quell eggs, rendering the place uninhabitable for Lord FESie

What's a quell egg?

It is like a quail egg, but made by Buddhist monks, rolled on the legs of virgin spiders in a secret cave in Alaska

[RDW]

Mrs RDW-to-be's parents used to have quail that gave them eggs - it is cheaper to buy an actual quail than 6 of it's eggs in the shops.

Remember that the next time you get Waitrose 'essentials' quail eggs Mr FES!

[funnyExiledScot]

Mrs RDW-to-be's parents used to have quail that gave them eggs - it is cheaper to buy an actual quail than 6 of it's eggs in the shops.

Remember that the next time you get Waitrose 'essentials' quail eggs Mr FES!

You have done well.

Sadly a local Waitrose hasn't made it to Trinity, so I now frequent Lord Sainsbury's shopping boutique in Craigleith. Whisper it quietly else I offend the gilet and Hunter wellies brigade, but it's actually much better.

[RDW]

Her dad is retired and is a gamekeeper so it is more the country lifestyle as opposed to marrying into landed gentry!

[jimbopip]

Mrs RDW-to-be's parents used to have quail that gave them eggs - it is cheaper to buy an actual quail than 6 of it's eggs in the shops.

Remember that the next time you get Waitrose 'essentials' quail eggs Mr FES!

You have done well.

Sadly a local Waitrose hasn't made it to Trinity, so I now frequent Lord Sainsbury's shopping boutique in Craigleith. Whisper it quietly else I offend the gilet and Hunter wellies brigade, but it's actually much better.

There's nothing to say....

[George Carlin]

Her dad is retired and is a gamekeeper so it is more the country lifestyle as opposed to marrying into landed gentry!

So just to be clear - your father in law has a gun?

[jimbopip]

Her dad is retired and is a gamekeeper so it is more the country lifestyle as opposed to marrying into landed gentry!

So just to be clear - your father in law has a gun?

George, you come from Ayr: didn't everyone's father have a gun?

[funnyExiledScot]

Mrs RDW-to-be's parents used to have quail that gave them eggs - it is cheaper to buy an actual quail than 6 of it's eggs in the shops.

Remember that the next time you get Waitrose 'essentials' quail eggs Mr FES!

You have done well.

Sadly a local Waitrose hasn't made it to Trinity, so I now frequent Lord Sainsbury's shopping boutique in Craigleith. Whisper it quietly else I offend the gilet and Hunter wellies brigade, but it's actually much better.

There's nothing to say....

Can I just say that is comfortably your most impressive use of the quotation function.

[RDW]

Her dad is retired and is a gamekeeper so it is more the country lifestyle as opposed to marrying into landed gentry!

So just to be clear - your father in law has a gun?

I can neither confirm nor deny.

What's more worrying is the mother-in-law knows how to shoot too!

[funnyExiledScot]

Her dad is retired and is a gamekeeper so it is more the country lifestyle as opposed to marrying into landed gentry!

So just to be clear - your father in law has a gun?

I can neither confirm nor deny.

What's more worrying is the mother-in-law knows how to shoot too!

I'd be far more worried about the gamekeeper's wife. The thought of what she'll have done to animals with a kitchen knife should certainly keep you on the straight and narrow. Perhaps stay clear of Mrs Coman......

[George Carlin]

Her dad is retired and is a gamekeeper so it is more the country lifestyle as opposed to marrying into landed gentry!

So just to be clear - your father in law has a gun?

George, you come from Ayr: didn't everyone's father have a gun?

Everyone's mother certainly had one.

[RuggerRadge2611]

Her dad is retired and is a gamekeeper so it is more the country lifestyle as opposed to marrying into landed gentry!

So just to be clear - your father in law has a gun?

George, you come from Ayr: didn't everyone's father have a gun?

Everyone's mother certainly had one.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ka5pedLmLs

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

GC - that reminds me of Ooor Gordy (Shrek) Reid's comments when he was selected for his debut, Scotland v Tonga, played at Kilmarnock. He said "The only time I have been to Kilmarnock was for a fight at the bus station" Gordy Reid is from Ayr !!!!!!!!

[George Carlin]

GC - that reminds me of Ooor Gordy (Shrek) Reid's comments when he was selected for his debut, Scotland v Tonga, played at Kilmarnock.   He said  "The only time I have been to Kilmarnock was for a fight at the bus station"   Gordy Reid is from Ayr !!!!!!!!

I passed my driving test in Killie.

There was an optional learning module if you wanted to practice ramraids, drive by shootings and tyre theft.

An absolute, unequivocal toilet of a place.

[funnyExiledScot]

GC - that reminds me of Ooor Gordy (Shrek) Reid's comments when he was selected for his debut, Scotland v Tonga, played at Kilmarnock.   He said  "The only time I have been to Kilmarnock was for a fight at the bus station"   Gordy Reid is from Ayr !!!!!!!!

How delightful. Lovely to actually travel somewhere "for a fight".

[EWT Spoons]

When I was at school we did the same thing. We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa. It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

[funnyExiledScot]

When I was at school we did the same thing.  We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa.  It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

Oh yes, I know where you're coming from. We exchanged some pretty heated words with our rival school when those exam result league tables got published. Trust funds were insulted, my Daddy has more non-exec directorships that your Daddy etc. etc. Pretty cutting stuff. Sometimes it got really nasty and spilled into the Eton Fives. Not for the faint hearted I tell you.

[EWT Spoons]

When I was at school we did the same thing.  We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa.  It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

Oh yes, I know where you're coming from. We exchanged some pretty heated words with our rival school when those exam result league tables got published. Trust funds were insulted, my Daddy has more non-exec directorships that your Daddy etc. etc. Pretty cutting stuff. Sometimes it got really nasty and spilled into the Eton Fives. Not for the faint hearted I tell you.

Wow, that put's things into perspective.  If you don't mind me asking, do you ever suffer from PTSD? It sounds like years of councilling would be needed after those harrowing experiences.  

[jimbopip]

GC - that reminds me of Ooor Gordy (Shrek) Reid's comments when he was selected for his debut, Scotland v Tonga, played at Kilmarnock.   He said  "The only time I have been to Kilmarnock was for a fight at the bus station"   Gordy Reid is from Ayr !!!!!!!!

I can just see the timetable;

9:00 A47 Ivine via Dreghorn
9:17 A39 Prestwick via Maybole and Annbank
9:21 CU Square go with all comers
9:42 Paddy Wagon Sherrif Court.

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

When I was at school we did the same thing.  We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa.  It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

Oh yes, I know where you're coming from. We exchanged some pretty heated words with our rival school when those exam result league tables got published. Trust funds were insulted, my Daddy has more non-exec directorships that your Daddy etc. etc. Pretty cutting stuff. Sometimes it got really nasty and spilled into the Eton Fives. Not for the faint hearted I tell you.

Wow, that put's things into perspective.  If you don't mind me asking, do you ever suffer from PTSD? It sounds like years of councilling would be needed after those harrowing experiences.  

Sarcasm at its best !

[jimbopip]

When I was at school we did the same thing.  We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa.  It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

Oh yes, I know where you're coming from. We exchanged some pretty heated words with our rival school when those exam result league tables got published. Trust funds were insulted, my Daddy has more non-exec directorships that your Daddy etc. etc. Pretty cutting stuff. Sometimes it got really nasty and spilled into the Eton Fives. Not for the faint hearted I tell you.

Wow, that put's things into perspective.  If you don't mind me asking, do you ever suffer from PTSD? It sounds like years of councilling would be needed after those harrowing experiences.  

Now you have traumatised him. We don't mention the fact that Fes was turned down from Harrow.

[George Carlin]

When I was at school we did the same thing.  We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa.  It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

Oh yes, I know where you're coming from. We exchanged some pretty heated words with our rival school when those exam result league tables got published. Trust funds were insulted, my Daddy has more non-exec directorships that your Daddy etc. etc. Pretty cutting stuff. Sometimes it got really nasty and spilled into the Eton Fives. Not for the faint hearted I tell you.

Hopefully you didn't get too much organic yoghurt spilled on your Brora cashmere school jumpers.

[funnyExiledScot]

When I was at school we did the same thing.  We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa.  It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

Oh yes, I know where you're coming from. We exchanged some pretty heated words with our rival school when those exam result league tables got published. Trust funds were insulted, my Daddy has more non-exec directorships that your Daddy etc. etc. Pretty cutting stuff. Sometimes it got really nasty and spilled into the Eton Fives. Not for the faint hearted I tell you.

Hopefully you didn't get too much organic yoghurt spilled on your Brora cashmere school jumpers.

Don't worry. I had a snappy little Barbour wastecoat to prevent such a catastrophe.

[jimbopip]

When I was at school we did the same thing.  We had a big rivalry with another school so we used to go and fight them and vice versa.  It was like a home and away fixture, with the final being held at a neutral venue (half way).

Oh yes, I know where you're coming from. We exchanged some pretty heated words with our rival school when those exam result league tables got published. Trust funds were insulted, my Daddy has more non-exec directorships that your Daddy etc. etc. Pretty cutting stuff. Sometimes it got really nasty and spilled into the Eton Fives. Not for the faint hearted I tell you.

Hopefully you didn't get too much organic yoghurt spilled on your Brora cashmere school jumpers.

Don't worry. I had a snappy little Barbour wastecoat to prevent such a catastrophe.

Now mater and pater will be traumatised: all that money on school fees and one's son still cannot spell waistcoat, what a waste.

[funnyExiledScot]

School isn't about spelling or learning. It's just a networking exercise. Who you know rather than what you know etc....

[George Carlin]

School isn't about spelling or learning. It's just a networking exercise. Who you know rather than what you know etc....

"Whom"

[jimbopip]

George, go easy on the Festering one.

To paraphrase your fellow Ayrshireman Bill Shankly,
"Never having had the benefit of an expensive education I had to use my brains to get on in life."

[funnyExiledScot]

George, go easy on the Festering one.

To paraphrase your fellow Ayrshireman Bill Shankly,
"Never having had the benefit of an expensive education I had to use my brains to get on in life."

Lukly fur mee eye haad tat pricy edoocashon.

[RuggerRadge2611]

George, go easy on the Festering one.

To paraphrase your fellow Ayrshireman Bill Shankly,
"Never having had the benefit of an expensive education I had to use my brains to get on in life."

Lukly fur mee eye haad tat pricy edoocashon.

That's what happens when FES has had one too many Bolly Grand Années on a work night.

[IanBru]

Genuinely, I think the only things I learned at my nice pricey school were that only one item in the suit-shirt-tie combo should have a pattern, and that a full Windsor knot is the preserve of pimps and bounders.

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

I'll have you know that a full Windsor knot was my preferred way of having my silk Armani tied. Anyway Bru did you and fES not have bowties and top hats and all that schieze ?

[George Carlin]

Always four in hand and a cutaway collar for me.
French cuffs mandatory for us citylawyerarsewipes.
Loakes shoes always, but never brogues. I'm not 50 years old.

[madmaccas]

This afternoon Glasgow Warriors ‘A’ will take on Edinburgh ‘A’ at Broadwood Stadium, kick-off 3pm.

You can really see the difference in the 2 squads based on those teams. Glasgow's isn't far off the team that was doing well in the PRO12 a couple of years ago, whereas Edinburgh's looks pretty unknown. I expect a drubbing will follow.

Edinburgh (A)

15. Jack Cuthbert
14. Ross McCann
13. Sam Beard
12. Andries Strauss (C)
11. Ruari Howarth
10. Tom Galbraith
9. Murdo McAndrew

1. Allan Dell
2. George Turner
3. Craig Bachurzewski
4. Lewis Carmichael
5. Fin Field
6. Luke Crosbie
7. Callum Reid
8. Ally Miller

16. Ross Graham 17. Grant Shiells 18. Murray McCallum 19. Hamish Bain 20. Charlie Shiel


Glasgow (A)

15. Nyle Godsmark (Melrose)
14. Junior Bulumakau
13. Nick Grigg
12. Sam Johnson
11. Rory Hughes
10. Duncan Weir
9. Ali Price
1. Alex Allan
2. James Malcolm
3. Mike Cusack
4. Greg Peterson
5. James Eddie
6. Tyrone Holmes
7. Chris Fusaro (Captain)
8. Bruce Flockhart.

Subs: Jerry Yanuyanutawa, Javan Sebastian, Cameron Fenton, Will Bordill, Matt Smith, Andy Redmayne (Glasgow Hawks), Patrick Nicol (Stirling County), Scott Bikerstaff (Marr), Gregor Hunter, Archie Russell (BT Sport Scottish Rugby Academy Stage 2 player).

[George Carlin]

I see that Exfoliators A play Soapdodgers A at Broadwood at 3pm this afternoon.

According to their respective websites, the teams are:

Edinburgh A
15 Jack Cuthbert
14 Ross McCann
13 Sam Beard
12 Andries Strauss (C)
11 Ruari Howarth
10 Tom Galbraith
9 Murdo McAndrew

1 Allan Dell
2 George Turner
3 Craig Bachurzewski
4 Lewis Carmichael
5 Fin Field
6 Luke Crosbie
7 Callum Reid
8 Ally Miller

16 Ross Graham
17 Grant Shiells
18 Murray McCallum
19 Hamish Bain
20 Charlie Shiel

Glasgow A
15. Nyle Godsmark (Melrose)
14. Junior Bulumakau
13. Nick Grigg
12. Sam Johnson
11. Rory Hughes
10. Duncan Weir
9. Ali Price

1. Alex Allan
2. James Malcolm
3. Mike Cusack
4. Greg Peterson
5. James Eddie
6. Tyrone Holmes
7. Chris Fusaro (Captain)
8. Bruce Flockhart.

Subs: Jerry Yanuyanutawa, Javan Sebastian, Cameron Fenton, Will Bordill, Matt Smith, Andy Redmayne (Glasgow Hawks), Patrick Nicol (Stirling County), Scott Bikerstaff (Marr), Gregor Hunter, Archie Russell (BT Sport Scottish Rugby Academy Stage 2 player).

I think that Glasgow will win because they seem to have far more players than Edinburgh.

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Nyle ( ) Godsmark ? Anyone know anything about this fella - apart from he plays for Melrose ? Bloody strong second string tbh. Is it a closed door game or I might head up to the wasteland that is Cumbernauld.

[funnyExiledScot]

This afternoon Glasgow Warriors ‘A’ will take on Edinburgh ‘A’ at Broadwood Stadium, kick-off 3pm.

You can really see the difference in the 2 squads based on those teams. Glasgow's isn't far off the team that was doing well in the PRO12 a couple of years ago, whereas Edinburgh's looks pretty unknown. I expect a drubbing will follow.

Edinburgh (A)

15. Jack Cuthbert
14. Ross McCann
13. Sam Beard
12. Andries Strauss (C)
11. Ruari Howarth
10. Tom Galbraith
9. Murdo McAndrew

1. Allan Dell
2. George Turner
3. Craig Bachurzewski
4. Lewis Carmichael
5. Fin Field
6. Luke Crosbie
7. Callum Reid
8. Ally Miller

16. Ross Graham 17. Grant Shiells 18. Murray McCallum 19. Hamish Bain 20. Charlie Shiel


Glasgow (A)

15. Nyle Godsmark (Melrose)
14. Junior Bulumakau
13. Nick Grigg
12. Sam Johnson
11. Rory Hughes
10. Duncan Weir
9. Ali Price
1. Alex Allan
2. James Malcolm
3. Mike Cusack
4. Greg Peterson
5. James Eddie
6. Tyrone Holmes
7. Chris Fusaro (Captain)
8. Bruce Flockhart.

Subs: Jerry Yanuyanutawa, Javan Sebastian, Cameron Fenton, Will Bordill, Matt Smith, Andy Redmayne (Glasgow Hawks), Patrick Nicol (Stirling County), Scott Bikerstaff (Marr), Gregor Hunter, Archie Russell (BT Sport Scottish Rugby Academy Stage 2 player).

I've highlighted in bold the starters I've never heard of!!

James Malcolm GP starts for Glasgow, so I can't see Edinburgh getting close.

[funnyExiledScot]

Nice to see Strauss captaining at this level. He'll slot in nicely.

[George Carlin]

Tom Galbraith is the Melrose lad? I think that he was well liked at U20s level.

He will almost certainly throw fewer intercept passes than his opposite number.

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Bet ya Junior crosses for at least one try during his time on the field. It is a 60 min game btw

[RDW]

On paper that does look a real mismatch. Edinburgh’s number 14 and 20 were in 6th year last year and played for my club last season – great to see them involved, but this is a massive step up.

Good thing we have a world class 12 leading the team!

[21st Century Schizoid Man]

Good for them RD. To get a run with/v pro players at that level is some achievement.

[funnyExiledScot]

On paper that does look a real mismatch. Edinburgh’s number 14 and 20 were in 6th year last year and played for my club last season – great to see them involved, but this is a massive step up.

Were you overlooked for this gig? Can you not dabble at 12? Just tell them you're an Administrator on 606v2 - that's real leadership.

[RDW]

Ross McMann plays for Stu Mel (Prem 2) and Charlie Shiel (ex internationalist Graeme Sheil’s son) has been getting some gametime for Currie in Prem 1 this season at 9.

[funnyExiledScot]

Ross McMann plays for Stu Mel (Prem 2) and Charlie Shiel (ex internationalist Graeme Sheil’s son) has been getting some gametime for Currie in Prem 1 this season.

Underrated player Graham Shiel. A proper centre who understood his craft, and made others around him look better than they were.

[George Carlin]

Now that I look at those sides, the tight 5 is a horrible mismatch.

Greg/Jeff/Oscar Peterson's right boot probably weighs more than Edinburgh's boiler room combined.

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