Glasgow and Edinburgh: Ongoing Banter Thread X-rated

[funnyExiledScot]

First topic message reminder :

Previously by the same artist:

https://www.606v2.com/t48240-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread
https://www.606v2.com/t51313-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-ii
https://www.606v2.com/t53119-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-iii
https://www.606v2.com/t54519-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-iv
https://www.606v2.com/t55409-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-v-the-fun-continues
https://www.606v2.com/t56913p950-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-vi-banter-boogaloo
https://www.606v2.com/t57946-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-vii
https://www.606v2.com/t58659-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-viii
https://www.606v2.com/t59409p1000-glasgow-and-edinburgh-ongoing-banter-thread-ix

Edinburgh

1872 Champions

Glasgow

1872 Runners-up

[RDW]

One thing occurred to me on hearing of Townsend's contract extension (OK, it has been a week, practically, but my brain tends to slow down in cold weather) - we've been talking about the rise in brand Gregor, and the question of whether he'll jump straight up to the Scotland job (considering his and Vern's contracts expire at the same time), or whether he'd be able to jump to a prestigious club in England or France (Bath, Toulouse or Montpellier would be my preferred options).

Perhaps a more interesting question is the rise in the brand of Glasgow Warriors, and whether there might be a quality coach looking to come here in 2017 - it's a guarantee of strong resources, international exposure and the opportunity to live in the greatest city on the Clyde.

Who could/should be taking over at Glasgow?

Do we promote from within the club - i.e. Matt Taylor
Do we promote from the Scottish Premier clubs - I hear Ayr are rather good...
Or do we look abroad for a genuine world-class candidate?

This also extends into another debate - do you have your best coaches at Edinburgh/Glasgow or Scotland?

The SRU does have limited money after all, so where do we prioritise?

[funnyExiledScot]

I like to think that there's a Scottish candidate out there who could take over the role should Toonie depart at the end of his current contract. I think it would be a shame should Glasgow, Edinburgh and Scotland all be supervised by foreign coaches. I'm hopeful that Steve Scott will assume control of Edinburgh once Solomons dies, and Toonie take over from Cotter once we've won back to back grand slams.

For Glasgow I'd assume Matt Taylor would be the front runner, and having played for Scotland A we can assume that his Aussie accent was entirely down to watching Neighbours as a child living in Paisley. Kenny Murray to continue as his assistant and sprinkle that Ayrshire magic in training.

For an external Scottish coach there aren't many with enough experience: there's Richie Gray (who is presumably out of work following Meyer's resignation), Toonie's old half back buddie Bryan Redpath (who hasn't had much success so far as a coach) and Alan Tait (who thus far has been a defence coach responsible for some dreadful defences).

Actually on the Richie Gray front I wonder if Cotter shouldn't be trying to tap him up for a coaching role with Scotland. I mean our breakdown skills have been completely awesome for years, but we shouldn't be complacent.

[BigGee]

I think that Toonie will eventually go into the Scotland job but my preference would be after the next WC. If Big Vern makes a good go of these next 2 years then he should be encouraged to carry on. Toonie is doing a fantastic job, but he is still relatively young in coaching terms.

I think we are kidding ourselves if we really think we will get a top rated world coach to come to Glasgow and we would be much better off continuing to grow our own. Alternatively we could be looking at trying to tempt back some scottish coaches that have already been exported. There are currently a few kicking around the English and French leagues.

I think though that it is more likely that we will see a more seemless handover, with Taylor and Murray both in the frame to step up. It is almost certain that Mike Blair will move into a coaching role as well during the next 12 months.

Edinburgh as ever is a bit more tricky. Is Steve Scott really head coach material? I think the jury is still out on that one. If the answer to that was yes, I think that Solly might not have had his contract extended as quickly as he did this year. I am sure though that they will be looking at a new head coach at the end of next season though one way or the other.

[funnyExiledScot]

I think you're right about Blair. If Taylor or Murray step up, I could easily see Blair slotting into an assistant role.

I agree on Scott, but if you overlook him it sets a difficult precedent (unless he's comfortable continuing in that assistant role).

[nickj]

Good point re Ritchie Gray being on the market. If we could afford him, he'd be a great specialist coach for both clubs and the national team

[IanBru]

So true on Mike Blair - in fact, I can see him taking over at Glasgow (or even Edinburgh) within five years.

I was really pleased when he came to Glasgow, but I think I saw this as the last death-rattle of his career, and that he'd be a liability if he actually ventured onto the pitch.

Instead, I've been reminded just how classy a player Blair has always been. In terms of pure half-back skills, he is probably the best number 9 currently playing in Scotland. Henry P is fantastic and is probably the closest to a Blair-esque player in the current Scotland set-up, but I'm just happy to have Blair on the right side at last.

[RDW]

We definitely need to get Gray involved, but on the other hand we already have numerous assistant coaches! If between Taylor, Humphries and Cotter our rucking is still a mess then you've got to question their abilities.

With regards to the long term plan it is worth remembering that 2 seasons is a very long time in rugby - we just have no idea how each respective candidate will be thought of by then and there may even be names that we would never consider currently.

Reckon Todd Blackadder would ever come back to Scotland?

[IanBru]

Todd Blackadder's an interesting choice, and when Big Vern is poached by the All Blacks after Scotland defeat them in the 2019 RWC final (thereafter known as the 'Takedown in Tokyo' [use Don King voice]), I wouldn't be surprised if Todd recognises that the Scotland job as the natural stepping stone to the All Blacks.

[BigGee]

After initially hoping that Toonie would have signed a longer contract, I am coming around to the idea that he may actually move on in 2017 and not necesserily to Scotland.

He will have been 5 years at Glasgow by then, which is a decent amount of time for any coach to stay with a team and he may feel that both he and the club need a freshen up at that stage.

If he was to go off to coach in England or France for 2 years, it might just test him that bit more and make him into a more rounded coach to take on the Scotland job in 4 years time. He just need to make sure he has the appropriate release clauses in his contract!

[funnyExiledScot]

Todd Blackadder's an interesting choice, and when Big Vern is poached by the All Blacks after Scotland defeat them in the 2019 RWC final (thereafter known as the 'Takedown in Tokyo' [use Don King voice]), I wouldn't be surprised if Todd recognises that the Scotland job as the natural stepping stone to the All Blacks.

I actually feel that the All Blacks is the natural stepping stone to the Edinburgh job. Just an opinion.

[Tattie Scones RRN]

Interesting interview with Lamont:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35112769

What's even more surprising is this:

"I've put in some good speed times and I'm fastest in the squad at the moment, believe it or not," Lamont commented.

Concerning that he's supposedly the fastest!!

[RDW]

Interesting interview with Lamont:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35112769

What's even more surprising is this:

"I've put in some good speed times and I'm fastest in the squad at the moment, believe it or not," Lamont commented.

Concerning that he's supposedly the fastest!!

[jimbopip]

RDW, I posted something similar, but not as funny, on the Scarlets-Glasgow thread.

[IanBru]

Todd Blackadder's an interesting choice, and when Big Vern is poached by the All Blacks after Scotland defeat them in the 2019 RWC final (thereafter known as the 'Takedown in Tokyo' [use Don King voice]), I wouldn't be surprised if Todd recognises that the Scotland job as the natural stepping stone to the All Blacks.

I actually feel that the All Blacks is the natural stepping stone to the Edinburgh job. Just an opinion.

Everyone needs a wind down, like those city traders who see the light and join the priesthood.

[George Carlin]

Interesting interview with Lamont:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35112769

What's even more surprising is this:

"I've put in some good speed times and I'm fastest in the squad at the moment, believe it or not," Lamont commented.

This can only refer to the recent after-hours hot dog eating tournament.

[funnyExiledScot]

Interesting interview with Lamont:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35112769

What's even more surprising is this:

"I've put in some good speed times and I'm fastest in the squad at the moment, believe it or not," Lamont commented.

Concerning that he's supposedly the fastest!!

We don't believe it Sean, because it isn't true. If Sean Lamont is quicker than Stuart Hogg then I'm a soap dodger.

[jimbopip]

By "priesthood" do you mean those who make the pilgrimage to Ayr and worship toast, by drinking their own body weight in Belhaven, the birth of ?

[jimbopip]

Interesting interview with Lamont:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35112769

What's even more surprising is this:

"I've put in some good speed times and I'm fastest in the squad at the moment, believe it or not," Lamont commented.

Concerning that he's supposedly the fastest!!

We don't believe it Sean, because it isn't true. If Sean Lamont is quicker than Stuart Hogg then I'm a soap dodger.

Fes, may I refer you to my comment on the Scarlets-Glasgow thread?

Also, when Schlong came on against the Scarlets on Saturday I was surprised by just how nippy he appeared. Not Carlin Isles but certainly way faster than Jack Cuthbert or yon Pie Eater Strauss chappie.

[funnyExiledScot]

We should have organised a 606v2 Nativity, with the following cast:

Messiah - The Messiah, aka Mark Bennett
Three Kings off to worship the Messiah - GC, Bru and Jimbo
John the Baptist (the one who foretold the Messiah) - ASBO
Virgin Mary - Schizoid

Nazareth - Ayr

[funnyExiledScot]

Interesting interview with Lamont:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35112769

What's even more surprising is this:

"I've put in some good speed times and I'm fastest in the squad at the moment, believe it or not," Lamont commented.

Concerning that he's supposedly the fastest!!

We don't believe it Sean, because it isn't true. If Sean Lamont is quicker than Stuart Hogg then I'm a soap dodger.

Fes, may I refer you to my comment on the Scarlets-Glasgow thread?

Also, when Schlong came on against the Scarlets on Saturday I was surprised by just how nippy he appeared. Not Carlin Isles but certainly way faster than Jack Cuthbert or yon Pie Eater Strauss chappie.

My bowels after an entire Dundee cake move faster than Jack Cuthbert.

[jimbopip]

but also

[George Carlin]

We should have organised a 606v2 Nativity, with the following cast:

Messiah - The Messiah, aka Mark Bennett
Three Kings off to worship the Messiah - GC, Bru and Jimbo
John the Baptist (the one who foretold the Messiah) - ASBO
Virgin Mary - Schizoid

Nazareth - Ayr

I am not confident that you'd find three wise men and a virgin in Ayr.

[RDW]

[jimbopip]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

[jimbopip]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

"You're certainly much quicker than you used to be" as MrsPip has been heard to remark, acidly.

[George Carlin]

[funnyExiledScot]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

"You're certainly much quicker than you used to be" as MrsPip has been heard to remark, acidly.

I feel your pain. I have a few grey hairs appearing at the front and sides, allegedly. When I say a few, I mean many, and when I say allegedly, I mean actually.

I pulled one out last night and Mrs fES' comment was: "I wouldn't bother, that looks like a losing battle".

[jimbopip]

We should have organised a 606v2 Nativity, with the following cast:

Messiah - The Messiah, aka Mark Bennett
Three Kings off to worship the Messiah - GC, Bru and Jimbo
John the Baptist (the one who foretold the Messiah) - ASBO
Virgin Mary - Schizoid

Nazareth - Ayr

The Three Kings- Fes, if he'd be willing to take a pay cut and the stable could be moved to a more salubrious postcode.

[George Carlin]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

"You're certainly much quicker than you used to be" as MrsPip has been heard to remark, acidly.

I feel your pain. I have a few grey hairs appearing at the front and sides, allegedly. When I say a few, I mean many, and when I say allegedly, I mean actually.

I pulled one out last night and Mrs fES' comment was: "I wouldn't bother, that looks like a losing battle".

 I sympathise. A lot of my facial stubble is now white.

I was hoping it would make me look like George Clooney.

In actual fact, after 2 days I tend to look homeless.

[IanBru]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

"You're certainly much quicker than you used to be" as MrsPip has been heard to remark, acidly.

I feel your pain. I have a few grey hairs appearing at the front and sides, allegedly. When I say a few, I mean many, and when I say allegedly, I mean actually.

I pulled one out last night and Mrs fES' comment was: "I wouldn't bother, that looks like a losing battle".

Yeah, me too. Strangely they all appeared when I was on the Legal Practice Course, and it hasn't got any worse since then. That year can kill you.

[RDW]

Jeezo, you'd think these two had taken over the forum!

[jimbopip]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

"You're certainly much quicker than you used to be" as MrsPip has been heard to remark, acidly.

I feel your pain. I have a few grey hairs appearing at the front and sides, allegedly. When I say a few, I mean many, and when I say allegedly, I mean actually.

I pulled one out last night and Mrs fES' comment was: "I wouldn't bother, that looks like a losing battle".

Yeah, me too. Strangely they all appeared when I was on the Legal Practice Course, and it hasn't got any worse since then. That year can kill you.

I laughed at this until I remembered that awful moment in the Fanzone after the Scotland-Boks match when one of Bru's groupies (yes he has them) asked,

"So are you Ian's dad then?"

[funnyExiledScot]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

"You're certainly much quicker than you used to be" as MrsPip has been heard to remark, acidly.

I feel your pain. I have a few grey hairs appearing at the front and sides, allegedly. When I say a few, I mean many, and when I say allegedly, I mean actually.

I pulled one out last night and Mrs fES' comment was: "I wouldn't bother, that looks like a losing battle".

Yeah, me too. Strangely they all appeared when I was on the Legal Practice Course, and it hasn't got any worse since then. That year can kill you.

The only thing that took a battering during my LPC year was my liver. What a complete waste of time!

[funnyExiledScot]

GC

The good ones never get old. As I keep saying to MrsPip, and Schlong says to Toonie.

"You're certainly much quicker than you used to be" as MrsPip has been heard to remark, acidly.

I feel your pain. I have a few grey hairs appearing at the front and sides, allegedly. When I say a few, I mean many, and when I say allegedly, I mean actually.

I pulled one out last night and Mrs fES' comment was: "I wouldn't bother, that looks like a losing battle".

Yeah, me too. Strangely they all appeared when I was on the Legal Practice Course, and it hasn't got any worse since then. That year can kill you.

I laughed at this until I remembered that awful moment in the Fanzone after the Scotland-Boks match when one of Bru's groupies (yes he has them) asked,

"So are you Ian's dad then?"

At least it wasn't grandpa.

[George Carlin]

Jeezo, you'd think these two had taken over the forum!

You've taken that too far

[madmaccas]

Just seen that Dr Cross has been loaned to London Scottish. Great to have 2 Scotland internationals in the starting team for this weekend!

[George Carlin]

Bring it biatches:
https://www.606v2.com/t61639-1872-cup-2015-round-1-edinburgh-v-glasgow

[RDW]

If anyone is needing a Christmas present for the rugby fan in their lives...

https://www.606v2.com/t61643-rugby-union-team-manager-2016-season-update-and-50-price-drop-hows-that-for-a-christmas-present

[funnyExiledScot]

I could see myself giving over years to that game! I'm pretty sure that whatever Mrs fES buys me for Christmas, it won't be something that facilitates more rugby in my life!!

Baby fES was awesome yesterday. Fell asleep on my lap for the entire duration of Leicester vs Munster so not only did I get to watch the entire game, I also stacked up some credit for looking after the wee one for the better part of the afternoon/evening. That counts as a victory in my life!

[RDW]

That counts as a victory in my life!

Well yesterday we went to Scran and Scallie for lunch on a whim (and had the most amazing burger I have ever eaten), got a hello from Tom Kitchin himself then went for a wander round Stockbridge. I then got home to watch all the rugby with a beer in hand and nothing else distracting my attention.

I'm definitely glad to be #teamnokids when comparing how our days were spent!

[funnyExiledScot]

That counts as a victory in my life!

Well yesterday we went to Scran and Scallie for lunch on a whim (and had the most amazing burger I have ever eaten), got a hello from Tom Kitchin himself then went for a wander round Stockbridge. I then got home to watch all the rugby with a beer in hand and nothing else distracting my attention.

I'm definitely glad to be #teamnokids when comparing how our days were spent!

#shouldhavebeenfixingthebridge

[George Carlin]

I didn't see anything over the weekend. I didn't do anything apart from alternate which children were hanging from which limb. My wife was working.

I selfishly attempted to carve out 5 minutes for myself in order to take a dump. Didn't happen. They found me.

I don't wish to dissuade anyone currently contemplating this endeavour but 2 toddlers are a lo of work.

[jimbopip]

You're just a novice George. Wait till one of them is 21 and asks you to pull on the boots "for a couple of games, just so we can have played together". Then when you have just survived two seasons of that and start thinking of burning all your kit, just to be sure, the 12 year old starts saying, "How long till I can play seniors with you?"

Be afraid, be very afraid.

[funnyExiledScot]

You're just a novice George. Wait till one of them is 21 and asks you to pull on the boots "for a couple of games, just so we can have played together". Then when you have just survived two seasons of that and start thinking of burning all your kit, just to be sure, the 12 year old starts saying, "How long till I can play seniors with you?"

Be afraid, be very afraid.

You'll be the "Alan Solomons" of your rugby club!

I hope you have private medical care.....

[RDW]

That counts as a victory in my life!

Well yesterday we went to Scran and Scallie for lunch on a whim (and had the most amazing burger I have ever eaten), got a hello from Tom Kitchin himself then went for a wander round Stockbridge. I then got home to watch all the rugby with a beer in hand and nothing else distracting my attention.

I'm definitely glad to be #teamnokids when comparing how our days were spent!

#shouldhavebeenfixingthebridge

Well it is time these jokes stop - the truth has been revealed!

https://twitter.com/chrisdeerin/status/678652851120439297

[cakeordeath]

Interesting story on the BBC about Big T.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35145358

[RDW]

Interesting story on the BBC about Big T.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/rugby-union/35145358

I hope it is true, but to be fair Toony is hardly going to say anything else!

[funnyExiledScot]

I personally don't think Big T will stay past the summer, and I expect Big Naka will leave at the end of the season as well.

That should hopefully free up some budget to pay the likes of Lee Jones and Richie Vernon more money, or perhaps give Sean Lamont a "speed bonus" for being the fastest player in the Glasgow squad.

[BigGee]

I see Edinburgh are finally getting round to signing up some players!

Ben Toolis for another 2 years and Al Dicko for another 3.

Both decent bits of business and if they can wrap up a few others in the front row, then the pack will be sorted for some time to come.

Still need a FH though!

[RDW]

Fantastic news, especially on Dickinson who must have been in demand.

Hopefully Toolis can regain last season's form now he's back from injury.

Hopefully the first of many!

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