The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by Guest Fri 06 Nov 2015, 12:22 pm

First topic message reminder :

The Loaded Dog wrote:I haven't seen Altar of Plagues but my dentist reckons they're OK.

It's disappointing on so many levels, LD.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:17 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Just been asked to stay until end of December. working out nicely....
Unless they just want a Xmas bumboy and have heard all about you

Been here 8 years son. First time at the Xmas party as a singleton though....

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:20 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Just been asked to stay until end of December. working out nicely....
Unless they just want a Xmas bumboy and have heard all about you

First time at the Xmas party as a singleton though....

I bet the girls are drooling at the gash at the thought of you being single this year?

by Alistair Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:21 pm

Or getting the polyfila out...

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:28 pm

It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:30 pm

Might not go. Only had about 5 colleagues I spoke to and they all left in September. It does take me to 8 years service though so i may be entitled to another week tax free...... The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy - Page 3 3559488474

The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy - Page 3 3559488474

by Guest Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:31 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Just been asked to stay until end of December. working out nicely....
Unless they just want a Xmas bumboy and have heard all about you

Been here 8 years son. First time at the Xmas party as a singleton though....

Apologies, your sketchy work history barely registers when set alongside the enormity of your sexual depravity. However, I still stand by the Xmas bumboy comment

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:32 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

by Guest Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:34 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Xmas party well and truly Michaelsed

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:46 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

I don't wear novelty jumpers. Perish the thought.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:50 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

I don't wear novelty jumpers. Perish the thought.

Do you ever get mistaken for Will Ferrell in Elf when you wear the spinach combo at Xmas?

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 09 Nov 2015, 3:52 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

I don't wear novelty jumpers. Perish the thought.

Do you ever get mistaken for Will Ferrell in Elf when you wear the spinach combo at Xmas?

I haven't seen Elf but I am aware of who Will Ferrell is. He is a c*nt. That is where our similarities end though. I have never been physically mistaken for him.

by Guest Mon 09 Nov 2015, 4:00 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

I don't wear novelty jumpers. Perish the thought.

Do you ever get mistaken for Will Ferrell in Elf when you wear the spinach combo at Xmas?

I haven't seen Elf but I am aware of who Will Ferrell is. He is a c*nt. That is where our similarities end though. I have never been physically mistaken for him.

I've tried to dislike Will Ferrell but occasionally he'll do something funny (usually with John C Reilly) unlike Adam Sandler who's a proper dyed in the wool, no additives, no e-numbers, full-on c***.

Sorry Tina, you're still my favourite if it helps

by Mind the windows Tino. Mon 09 Nov 2015, 4:03 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

I don't wear novelty jumpers. Perish the thought.

Do you ever get mistaken for Will Ferrell in Elf when you wear the spinach combo at Xmas?

I haven't seen Elf but I am aware of who Will Ferrell is. He is a c*nt. That is where our similarities end though. I have never been physically mistaken for him.
I've tried to dislike Will Ferrell but occasionally he'll do something funny (usually with John C Reilly) unlike Adam Sandler who's a proper dyed in the wool, no additives, no e-numbers, full-on c***.

Sorry Tina, you're still my favourite if it helps

It bloody well does help, Serial.

You're now my favourite as well.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 4:14 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

I don't wear novelty jumpers. Perish the thought.

Do you ever get mistaken for Will Ferrell in Elf when you wear the spinach combo at Xmas?

I haven't seen Elf but I am aware of who Will Ferrell is. He is a c*nt. That is where our similarities end though. I have never been physically mistaken for him.
I've tried to dislike Will Ferrell but occasionally he'll do something funny (usually with John C Reilly) unlike Adam Sandler who's a proper dyed in the wool, no additives, no e-numbers, full-on c***.

Sorry Tina, you're still my favourite if it helps

It bloody well does help, Serial.

You're now my favourite as well.

You're everything his son will never be, Dave...err hold on...

by 1GrumpyGolfer Mon 09 Nov 2015, 6:33 pm

seanmichaels wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Just been asked to stay until end of December. working out nicely....
Unless they just want a Xmas bumboy and have heard all about you

Been here 8 years son. First time at the Xmas party as a simpleton though....

Must admit I misread this the first time. I know the missus moving out was a blow but didn't realise the majority of the brains of the operation would be leaving too.

Anyway, I'm sure you'll enjoy the party

by **Galted** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 7:59 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:It will the most poorly attended Xmas do forever.

Speaking of Xmas do you just use work jerseys as your novelty Xmas jumper?

I don't wear novelty jumpers. Perish the thought.

Do you ever get mistaken for Will Ferrell in Elf when you wear the spinach combo at Xmas?

I haven't seen Elf but I am aware of who Will Ferrell is. He is a c*nt. That is where our similarities end though. I have never been physically mistaken for him.

Some superb posts on here today, insightful and scathing in just the right quantities (ie a lot). I was thinking of announcing that I'm leaving 606v2 in the hope of getting some attention but I'm not going to now as a mark of respect to the superb posting on here today which, not sure if I've mentioned this already, has been insightful and scathing in just the right quantities (ie a lot).

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 8:21 pm

Anthropod question on UC. Bet windows missed it.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 8:24 pm

Will Ferrell in step brothers is hilarious.

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 8:25 pm

But is beneath Jeff.

by **ShahenshahG** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 8:35 pm

seanmichaels wrote:But is beneath Jeff.

Does TSMR know?

by **seanmichaels** Mon 09 Nov 2015, 9:06 pm

Undoubtedly. These gps monitoring systems are fairly reliable

by **Pal Joey** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 6:39 am

Hey ho(s)!

A teridactor* shat on the passenger side of my car early last night.

I was driving around when I suddenly saw what I thought was some bodily parts from one of Dave's Latest Hits illuminated all down the side window and part of the windscreen. I did one of those silent screams (such was the shock) and almost drove into the latest group of recent immigrants who were busy doing nothing... sauntering by the side of the road at night. Most were wearing low-viz black garments of course. As they often do.

In the harsh light of day (this morning) I had to scrub it away with a now unusable scouring pad. It really took some effort to get the partially baked excrement off.

* it was probably some low flying ibis or stork.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 6:49 am

Morning TLD/Shah

Sounds like a bonza start to the day, I was sh1t free happily.

How has the rest of the day been?

by **Pal Joey** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 7:13 am

Hello Ricko
The day was good thanks.
I did a design & fee proposal for some crowd up the road. I always give clients 5 Options... from Option A - the full services one with 3D flythrough to Option E - the basic concept sketch with phuck all else. I'm quite a tricky Basteraud of the highest order you know.
I know they will probably go for one of Options B,C or D though.

How is your day travelling so far? Has the fog lifted?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 7:29 am

Morning all.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 7:33 am

Fog has lifted mate, and a fine, autumnal, if windy, morning lies ahead.

Also Fallout 4 is out today and this makes me happy.

Morning Tino.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 7:35 am

seanmichaels wrote:Anthropod question on UC. Bet windows missed it.

For the sake of f*ck. What was the question, Seany? And did you answer it correctly?

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 7:59 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Anthropod question on UC. Bet windows missed it.

For the sake of f*ck. What was the question, Seany? And did you answer it correctly?

It was something along the lines of a spider has x, y and z 'features', what family of species is it? The answer was anthropods.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 8:09 am

Ouch.... http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-34773280

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 8:32 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Anthropod question on UC. Bet windows missed it.

For the sake of f*ck. What was the question, Seany? And did you answer it correctly?

It was something along the lines of a spider has x, y and z 'features', what family of species is it? The answer was anthropods.

You been watching Autumnwatch?

Did you see the chap letting the false widow run all over his hands? Last episode I think.

Brave guy letting those killing machines run all over him. Surprised he didn't lose an arm.

The Daily Mail are going to run a story on irresponsible BBC journalists being reckless with dangerous beasts.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:06 am

Michaelsed by arthropods.

That actually makes me happy, so the jokes on you lot. You bunch of b*stards.

Oh, and Galted. I f*cking love you.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:09 am

You can all go and f*ck yourselves.

Apart from Galted. Who I am deeply fond of.

And Serial as he is my new favourite.

And riCK as we are practically brothers.

The rest of you who haven't even been on today? You can all f*ck off.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:10 am

W*nkers.

by Guest Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:12 am

Moring all (especially Tina), feeling lousy. Think I've picked up a bug/virus. Really don't feel well at all.
To make matters worse, Chris Evans is on the radio, I'd almost forgotten just how much I f*cking hate that c***

by Dr Shoe Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:32 am

I was in a coffee shop this morning. It took me ages to get served because everyone was ordering beer. grrrrrrr.....

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:33 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Anthropod question on UC. Bet windows missed it.

For the sake of f*ck. What was the question, Seany? And did you answer it correctly?

It was something along the lines of a spider has x, y and z 'features', what family of species is it? The answer was anthropods.

You been watching Autumnwatch?

Did you see the chap letting the false widow run all over his hands? Last episode I think.

Brave guy letting those killing machines run all over him. Surprised he didn't lose an arm.

The Daily Mail are going to run a story on irresponsible BBC journalists being reckless with dangerous beasts.

I only caught the first episode. Will hopefully catch up if BT finally get things sorted today.

I squashed a false widow in my porch last year. Nasty looking feckers.

by Dr Shoe Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:34 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Anthropod question on UC. Bet windows missed it.

For the sake of f*ck. What was the question, Seany? And did you answer it correctly?

It was something along the lines of a spider has x, y and z 'features', what family of species is it? The answer was anthropods.

You been watching Autumnwatch?

Did you see the chap letting the false widow run all over his hands? Last episode I think.

Brave guy letting those killing machines run all over him. Surprised he didn't lose an arm.

The Daily Mail are going to run a story on irresponsible BBC journalists being reckless with dangerous beasts.

I only caught the first episode. Will hopefully catch up if BT finally get things sorted today.

I squashed a false widow in my porch last year. Nasty looking feckers.

I thought you drove an Astra?

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:35 am

Dr Shoe wrote:I was in a coffee shop this morning. It took me ages to get served because everyone was ordering beer. grrrrrrr.....

The CAMRA Strikes Back.......

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:48 am

People at work are making me work, w*nkers, so apologies Tino my brother from another mother...

Also, I got some of the questions right on the charity version of only connect, happy days.

And yes DAVE, Chris Evans is a f*ckknuckle of the highest order.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:48 am

seanmichaels wrote:Nasty looking feckers.

They are about the size of a 50 pence.

You screaming girl.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 9:56 am

I wasn't scared. Just didn't want it there so I executed it.

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 10:23 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:The rest of you who haven't even been on today? You can all f*ck off.

I already have.

by Guest Tue 10 Nov 2015, 10:24 am

Whilst I'm aware there are different varieties of spider, I wouldn't know a dangerous one if it doffed its cap and bid me good morning. My wife is terrified of them (a real full on meltdown occurs when she sees them) so I'm tasked with catching and releasing back into the wild or, if it's massive, I have to kill it.

I've told her that, whilst she's sleeping, spiders rub their willies on her face.

by Guest Tue 10 Nov 2015, 10:25 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:The rest of you who haven't even been on today? You can all f*ck off.

I already have.

What? Been on or f*cked off?

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 10:40 am

DAVE667 wrote:Whilst I'm aware there are different varieties of spider, I wouldn't know a dangerous one if it doffed its cap and bid me good morning. My wife is terrified of them (a real full on meltdown occurs when she sees them) so I'm tasked with catching and releasing back into the wild or, if it's massive, I have to kill it.

I've told her that, whilst she's sleeping, spiders rub their willies on her face.

Simple answer is, Serial, there aren't any 'dangerous' ones in the UK. If you're allergic to them, then you might be in some minor bother but that's your own fault for being so f*cking soft. The sort of people (almost certainly Sean) who have eczema and carry an inhaler round with them for when they get out of breath walking down the stairs. Spiders don't want to bite people, it is only if they get trapped in your clothing they might have a nibble. Even then you wouldn't even notice in almost every case.

We have a female Chilean rose tarantula at home. Now she, if she wanted to, could give a pretty fearsome bite as she has very long fangs, but even that would only be the equivalent of a bee sting. But, she hasn't ever bitten any of us and we handle her all the time. They aren't interested in biting people, only eating crickets and other bugs.

Loaded Dog might have to be pretty watchful in Sydney but there is nothing in this country to worry about.

But the willy thing is true. They actually stick their willies in peoples mouths as they sleep. ~~FACT.~~ GOSPEL.

by **seanmichaels** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 10:47 am

Just the thought of Tarantulas sends shivers down my spine. I'd squash it for sure.

Youngster from the club who has gone to play cricket north of Sydney (Terragal) whatsapp'd us a picture of a spider in his flat. Massive fecker. Looked like a Huntsman to me.

by Guest Tue 10 Nov 2015, 10:51 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:Whilst I'm aware there are different varieties of spider, I wouldn't know a dangerous one if it doffed its cap and bid me good morning. My wife is terrified of them (a real full on meltdown occurs when she sees them) so I'm tasked with catching and releasing back into the wild or, if it's massive, I have to kill it.

I've told her that, whilst she's sleeping, spiders rub their willies on her face.

Simple answer is, Serial, there aren't any 'dangerous' ones in the UK. If you're allergic to them, then you might be in some minor bother but that's your own fault for being so f*cking soft. The sort of people (almost certainly Sean) who have eczema and carry an inhaler round with them for when they get out of breath walking down the stairs. Spiders don't want to bite people, it is only if they get trapped in your clothing they might have a nibble. Even then you wouldn't even notice in almost every case.

We have a female Chilean rose tarantula at home. Now she, if she wanted to, could give a pretty fearsome bite as she has very long fangs, but even that would only be the equivalent of a bee sting. But, she hasn't ever bitten any of us and we handle her all the time. They aren't interested in biting people, only eating crickets and other bugs.

Loaded Dog might have to be pretty watchful in Sydney but there is nothing in this country to worry about.

But the willy thing is true. They actually stick their willies in peoples mouths as they sleep. ~~FACT.~~ GOSPEL.

This is why Tina's my favourite, you other f*ckers would do well to follow his example

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 10 Nov 2015, 10:53 am

seanmichaels wrote:Just the thought of Tarantulas sends shivers down my spine. I'd squash it for sure.

Youngster from the club who has gone to play cricket north of Sydney (Terragal) whatsapp'd us a picture of a spider in his flat. Massive fecker. Looked like a Huntsman to me.

You're welcome to come round and have a hold (the spider, not Mrs Windows. I don't want to lose her to you). They are perfectly safe.

You're more likely to get savaged by a dog as walk to my house.

Huntsmans are big b*stards.

by Guest Tue 10 Nov 2015, 11:01 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Just the thought of Tarantulas sends shivers down my spine. I'd squash it for sure.

Youngster from the club who has gone to play cricket north of Sydney (Terragal) whatsapp'd us a picture of a spider in his flat. Massive fecker. Looked like a Huntsman to me.

You're welcome to come round and have a hold (the spider, not Mrs Windows. I don't want to lose her to you). They are perfectly safe.

You're more likely to enjoy getting bummed by a dog as you walk to my house.

Huntsmans are big b*stards.

by **Pal Joey** Tue 10 Nov 2015, 11:14 am

seanmichaels wrote:Just the thought of Tarantulas sends shivers down my spine. I'd squash it for sure.

Youngster from the club who has gone to play cricket north of Sydney (Terragal) whatsapp'd us a picture of a spider in his flat. Massive fecker. Looked like a Huntsman to me.

Terrigal

Saw a woman attack a bikie with a pool cue in the Florida Hotel in Terrigal about 20 years ago.
He was smiling at first but then copped it just above his eye. He soon stopped grinning I tell you! (maybe he sunk the cue ball by mistake?)
Blood everywhere.

I'm impressed with your pet tarantula, Tino. I wouldn't have a pet funnel web. They move quite quickly when you poke them with a toothpick.
So you or your other 'alf have to go out and buy crickets and assorted bugs on a regular basis?
Does it hibernate over winter?

sean, did you see the one of the black snake that looked as though it ate its way out of a brown snake? See if I can dig it up for you.

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