The Last Film watched (CONTAINS STAR WARS SPOILERS!!)

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I watch two films over the last few days

Seventh Son: Absolute tosh, it felt like a bad D&D film from SyFy

The Wedding Ringer: It was a fun movie, predictable but fun, "Who the hell are these guys, it's like the Goonies grew up and became r@pists"

Yesterday I watched A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night. Followed it up with A Man Jumps Out From Behind a Tree and Hits Her With a Half-Brick.

DAVE667 wrote:Yeah, sounds sh!t even after reading your spoiler alert.

Haven't watched any films lately but next on my list is The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas.

Don't bother, it's f*cking dreadful.

Warm Bodies - bit of a twist on the zombie genre but was enjoyable although would prefer to see a follow up telling us the continuing story of what happens at the end.

War - Typical brainless Jason Statham fare which I normally like but couldn't get into this at all. Thought the 'ending' was absolute rubbish and made little to no sense.

I Believe in Miracles - is a documentary about Brian Clough and him taking over at Forest after getting sacked by Leeds after only 44 days. When he took over they were mid table in the first division, he got them promoted in his first season, won the league cup and title in his second season before winning the European Cup the season after, so it is fair to say he did pretty well.

The story is truly remarkable and the film does it justice. Every player who featured in the European Cup Final is featured and interviewed and all of them are warm, listenable and amusing to varying degrees. The old footage of Clough is also a welcome reminder of what actual charisma in a football manager actually looks like. I enjoyed the film enormously, the soundtrack is brilliant, the footage is everything you would want it to be and the story is truly remarkable.

Anybody who is old enough to remember a time before the Premier League and before players were all PR managed, sanitised dullards, when pitches were muddy, boots were black and you had to decapitate an opponent to get a yellow card will love this film. In a year when the summer blockbusters did not deliver, when Bond was disappointing and the Oscar winners were pretty uninspiring this is possibly my favourite film of the year.

Thanks for that review, Jeff.

I've been looking forward to seeing I Believe in Miracles since first reading about it but so far there have been no screenings in my neck of the woods. You make clear it's every bit as good as I was hoping it would be.

For those too young to remember Clough and his Forest team, worth emphasising that many of the players who enjoyed European success were looking more likely to end up on the bottle or in the clink before his arrival.

That is one of the amazing things about it Guildford, five of the team he won the European cup with were there when he took over, playing mid table 2nd division football. The director of the film was on Soccer Am the other week, he said they were in the same position as Huddersfield are currently when he took over. Beyond remarkable what they achieved there.

Can only hope the sequel is about Villa winning it a couple of seasons later, the current team gives me scant cause for celebration.

Jeff - not sure if it would be the basis for a film sequel but incredible to relate that when Villa won the league prior to their European success they only used 14 players the entire season. Definitely something that will never happen again.

Whilst were on useless Villa trivia from that era, Peter Withe was the last Villa forward to score 20 league goals in a season, which, as a fan, is worrying and remarkable in equal measures.

Football eh. Born in the 90s? Died, lad. You're too young to know real football ya nipper.

Would stay and chat with you Dolph but I'm busy working at getting funding for my film on Jimmy Dunne.

I watched Black Mass last week. Wasn't sure what to expect but was pleasantly surprised. It's a biopic of the notorious Boston Gangster-turned-FBI informer James "Whitey" Bulger with Johnny Depp in the main role. It's fascinating to finally see him in a role where he's not simply going through the motions. He really gets his teeth into it and is ably supported by a decent cast.

The film follows him through the 70s & 80s and is well-paced and well-written. Bulger's henchmen are very well cast and are well fleshed out without overshadowing the Bulger character in any way. Add into this the FBI agents who use Bulger for info (with a wonderful nod to the "Funny how?" line from Goodfellas at one point) and you have an excellent film.

One thing to note - if you or your better half think of Depp as "Sex on legs", you might take a different view after a certain scene in the film where he comes across as VERY frightening indeed. You'll know it when you see it.

Fascinating film, very interesting and superbly acted. As with any biopic there are certain bits of the true story edited out of the film for pacing reasons, but this is well worth watching. 9/10.

Will have to add that to the must see pile Mr Bounce cheers for that.

Watched 28 Days later again, find the last half hour uncomfortable as heck but is a really good film and I like the fact it plays on people breaking down rather than all out Hero's.

Went to watch Krampus, its one of those movies that its so terribly bad I actually enjoyed it

Its not gonna win any awards any time soon but it was good for a laugh

focus with will smith

beyond awful

I Am Love

A bit sh1t without being a total disgrace.

Worth watching the DVD extras just to hear how many times Tilda Swinton can say "milieu" in an interview.

Watched Spectre, thought it was better than Skyfall. I expected it to end differently - and the SPECTRE organisation weren't really what they've been talked up to be since Casino Royale. But yeah, a decent watch!

I thought Craig had signed on to be in one more Bond after this - after the way this movie ended I get the feeling this is the end of the Craig era; probably for the best as you can likely guess what the next one will be about.

Special Forces (Forces spéciales).

Good film. French cast, black chap off Gladiator in it. I actually preferred it to Lone Survivor which is the better known film of a similar ilk.

The Frozen Ground - Based on the true story of a Alaskan serial killer in the late 70/early 80's. Nicholas Cage plays a police officer tracking down this guy with the help of a 17 year prostitute who was the "one who got away". John Cusack plays the baddie. Formulaic and only bearable simply because it's true.

The Day - A post-apocalyptic survival film.  A group of people seek solace in an abandoned farmhouse before coming under attack from a bunch of baddies.

Pretty formulaic but did have some cracking moments.  A torture scene in particular was pretty brutal and the 'attack' scene had some decent aspects to it.

My main gripes were the characters were very one dimensional and it was shot in sepia which wound me up.  I get what they were trying to do but the attack scene was at night and with it being shot in sepia, it was almost impossible to tell exactly what was going on half the time.  It ruined what should have been a decent ending to a film.  Note to the producers - keep the w*nky film students out of the editing suite next time.  Film it in a proper light and let us revel in the throat slitting, torture and severed heads on sticks.

All in all, I was left feeling a little disappointed and thought it should have delivered more than it did.  Plus, the very final scene is a bloody joke.

Galted Scale of Cinematic Excellence - 5/10.  No where near pompous enough for Galted.  No subtitles and no long winded monologues from a desperately endearing lead actor as he pouts at the camera.  Plus it loses a mark on the GSoCE for not being directed by the Coen brothers.

Tino Scale of Cinematic Achievement - 6.1254/10.  Scores highly simply for being set in a post-apocalyptic landscape which I love.

HammersmithHarrier Scale of Accurate Titling - 1/10.  This is where the film really falls down.  It is clearly set over 2 days.  They find the farmhouse on day one.  Then the attack scene is through the night before the final scenes take place in the morning.  What a joke.  All they had to do was add an 's' to the end and call it The Days.  Lying b*stards.  Completely misleading title and for that alone, I urge you all to avoid it.

michaels scale of t1ts and violence?

rick_dagless wrote:michaels scale of t1ts and violence?

My apologies, riCK. How could I forget that.

Michaels Scale of T*ts and Violence - 8.5/10. Violence is aplenty. It has the lot from severed heads on sticks, slit throats, a child shot in the face, and Guantanamo Bay style 'enhanced interrogation' techniques of a poor young lady. Scores massively on the violence front.

There is a short scene when a girl gets her Bristols out and stands in the rain for an shower but seeing as the c*nts filmed it in sepia, it is hard to see what is nipple and what is dirt on her body. There is also a scene when a lady washes in the river but she is wearing massive pants and that puts me off. Do they not have thongs in post-apocalyptic worlds? But, she does then shoot someone in the chest with a shotgun whilst still wearing a bra and aforementioned massive pants so I am willing to cut them some slack for that scene. You also see a glimpse of knicker during the torture scene. All in all, a high score on the MSoTaV and plenty for Sean to get his teeth into.

I saw that was on last night on the Horror Channel but stumbled upon it late. Will check out the repeat.

I watched the first two Gremlins films with the kids. They have aged badly (the films and the kids)

Thanks Tino, I always like a well rounded view on my film scales, and this does that nicely.

MISSISSIPPI GRIND - Divorced father of one with dreadful gambling problem meets charismatic drifter Ryan Reynolds and the two embark on a road trip to take part in a high stakes poker game. Cracking little film with a nice soundtrack to boot. Ryan Reynolds does what he does best with hamming up too much...all in all, very good and kept my interest up to the very end.

Will also watch Tina's violent sepia toned film purely and simply because Tina said it was OK. He's my favourite and as such, pretty much whatever he likes is bound to be brilliant

DAVE667 wrote:

Will also watch Tina's violent sepia toned film purely and simply because Tina said it was OK. He's my favourite and as such, pretty much whatever he likes is bound to be brilliant

You'll love the violence, Serial. It might be a bit tame for you, but it will keep you going till you re-watch Driller Killer for the 109th time.

In fact, I spent much of the 2 hours and 4 minutes running time thinking of you. Firstly I was thinking how much you'd love the random acts of violence and disregard for human life, and secondly, I was hoping you'd hunt down the producer and dispense some of your own random acts of violence and disregard for human life to teach the simpering c*nt a lesson for filming it in sepia.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Will also watch Tina's violent sepia toned film purely and simply because Tina said it was OK. He's my favourite and as such, pretty much whatever he likes is bound to be brilliant

You'll love the violence, Serial.  It might be a bit tame for you, but it will keep you going till you re-watch Driller Killer for the 109th time.

In fact, I spent much of the 2 hours and 4 minutes running time thinking of you.  Firstly I was thinking how much you'd love the random acts of violence and disregard for human life, and secondly, I was hoping you'd hunt down the producer and dispense some of your own random acts of violence and disregard for human life to teach the simpering c*nt a lesson for filming it in sepia.

I'll see what I can do, Tina. It may be that I have to torture someone first until they admit to being the producer just to stop me setting fire to their innards, then I can get to work

anyone watched 'The physician' ? Good film, highly recommend it

Godzilla (2014)

Awful film with all-round awful acting (Ken Watanabe saying 'gojiya' anyone?), marginally remedied by the twist of the film (which I won't spoil in case you want to see it).

3/10.

Ex Machina - good film. Makes you think seriously about AI.

My b*starding YouView box failed to record "The Day" as recommended by the truly brilliant poster, Tina. Bloody livid I was (then the lass as Nursery jingled her Xmas breasts at me and I felt much better) Came home, searched online and found it. Will watch it (will watch the torture scenes repeatedly) then get back with a review.

Off to watch Star Wars later.

Dont go to the cinema much anymore, but my mates wife doesnt want to go, so ill happily take her place.

Looking forward to it, although dont know how an oap Han Solo will do.

I see...

1/ Han Solo shouting at all the Stormtroopers, "B*gger off back when you live or I'll tell your parents. Go on, get out of it." then flying the Falcon at 20mph with his indicators on whilst there a six light year tailback behind him.
2/ Chewbacca growling and him shouting "What?!?!?!?" every five seconds
3/ Han Solo refusing to go onto certain ships as there's no disabled access and disappearing every fifteen minutes for a wee and a nap

westisbest wrote:Off to watch Star Wars later.

Dont go to the cinema much anymore, but my mates wife doesnt want to go, so ill happily take her place.

Looking forward to it, although dont know how an oap Han Solo will do.

Was actually pretty good.
Watched it in 3D.

DAVE wrote:2/ Chewbacca growling and him shouting "What?!?!?!?" every five seconds

Leia: "I Love you"

Han: "Half past 5"

Gone Girl - 7/10. Based on what my wife says is an excellent book, and the story was very good even if the film itself could have been better made.

Also, watched a few minutes of a film called Zero Hour! on TCM last night. 1950s black and white film about an aircraft where both the pilot and co-pilot are struck down by food poisoning and a passenger is required to land the plane. Sound familiar? It should, as it formed rather more than the basis for Airplane, to the extent that it was almost a meta-parody: half the script is the same, to the extent that when Ted Straker (for it is he) says 'it's a different kind of flying altogether' you expect the doctor and stewardess to say 'it's a different kind of flying'...

Went to see star wars last night

I was so happy with what Abrams has created. This was empire strikes back good. I was surprised to find i didnt hate bb8, i expected it to be nothing more than quirky addition in order to shift a new toy and it wasnt

Well chuffed with it, will seee it a few more times i omagine with my cineworld card

Agreed Gazzy, just got back and I loved it. Have read criticisms that it is just a remake of the first one, which I can see but I thought they had got the look and the mood of it just right. Great action sequences as well. Would happily watch this again.

Just come back from watching it.

My children thought it was the greatest film they've seen, job done there.
Myself? Yes it's a great film, what's not to love in it, did I come away with a wow feeling as I thought I would? Not sure to be honest.
It was everything it should be but remained at the same time far too within its comfort zone, it was like the Johnny Cash version of Hurt, I loved the original, his is different but still is basically the same song.
I go away happy, but if Episode 8 is TESB with bells and whistles on then I'll be less pleased.
Not quite a remake or a reboot, more so a rework.

If you thought Age of Ultron was good then I can't see how you would think The Force Awakens is not as good!

I thought Age of Ultron was a crock of crap tbh.

I read a polar opposite view on here at the time Hero. I watched a midnight preview of it and thought it was alright... Then I watched it again on Sky Movies and thought the same as you. I think Civil War is headed that way too.

https://www.606v2.com/t57797p150-marvel-cinematic-universe#3009114

There were my views at the time on Age of Ultron which were very much against the grain.

I'm not at all though saying I didn't enjoy The Force Within, it was an absolutely great film, but that was because it was a reworking of a great film, they ticked every box but every box had already been ticked. I just hope that what follows now is not episodes 5&6 for a new generation.

I think that if they'd been upfront and said 'it's a reworking of the original for a new generation' then I'd have gone along and enjoyed it more, instead of coming away feeling a little cheated somewhat.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

So went to see this on midnight release and well apart from a fire alarm going on 30 minutes into the movie and told to leave before being allowed back in following the arrival of the emergency services. Anywho the movie was what it was, good acting, visual amazingly shot, no lens flares!

However it is not a movie without flaws and is rather lacking in the villain department, I never once felt like Kylo Ren was a threat.

8/10

Agree with you RE Ren, he seemed a bit subpar but at least that makes a bit of sense at the end wereyou find hes not yet completed his training. Woukd be more disappointed of he was supposed to be the real deal in his current state

Must admit im still buzzing from it, that whole scene were the resistance appear to save the recently captured han/chewy/fin was brilliant

Went to see Star Wars, absolutely loved it. The 2.5 hours flew in and I was hoping for more.

Good story, effects, performances and loads of lovely nods to the original without being over the top. Funny in parts, some emotional moments- perfect blockbuster really.

Good vs evil so always going to appear similar to a new hope- also disney invested heavily with this and needed a big return. They've guaranteed that now so we may get a lot more deviation in 8 & 9.

It wasn't just similar though was it.

Young Jedi adult with a destiny stuck on a desert planet - check
Evil villain related to one of the good guys - check
Giant planet destroying weapon that needs charging up and has the security settings of Sony - check
Older guy who confronts the evil guy only to get cut down - check
Funny beepy robot - check
Smuggler being chased by gang lords who he owes money to - check

My wife came with us to watch it, she'd never seen any of the other films so I gave her a brief synopsis of the originals beforehand, first thing she said to me as we came out was that hadn't I told her the plot of the Force Awakens before we got there.

I read a review that was titled 'The greatest disappointing film ever made', I think that's quite apt for it.

Hero, good summary!

I went to see Star Wars on Thursday

I wouldn't say I was disappointed by it but I do think there was a lot of room for improvement

Good points:

Well paced
Quite dark at times
Very much felt like a Star Wars movie

Bad points:

Villain started off well but ended up a bit "it just isn't fair" type of character by the end

The jedi mind trick scene with Rey was too Disney-esqe for my liking. Plus doesn't that type of mind power take years to learn?

The plot lacked originality

Hero wrote:It wasn't just similar though was it.

Young Jedi adult with a destiny stuck on a desert planet - check
Evil villain related to one of the good guys - check
Giant planet destroying weapon that needs charging up and has the security settings of Sony - check
Older guy who confronts the evil guy only to get cut down - check
Funny beepy robot - check
Smuggler being chased by gang lords who he owes money to - check

My wife came with us to watch it, she'd never seen any of the other films so I gave her a brief synopsis of the originals beforehand, first thing she said to me as we came out was that hadn't I told her the plot of the Force Awakens before we got there.

I read a review that was titled 'The greatest disappointing film ever made', I think that's quite apt for it.

Some of those are recurring characters and you don't find out about the famoly relation until empire strikes back.

It's good vs evil in the Star Wars universe, there are going to be common themes.

Don't think it was disappointing at all, if you wanna see that watch episode 1 again.