The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

His wife
Is obscene
She humps wolverine
Tino
Tino

You're all
A bunch of turds
I've been fisting Chinese birds.
Tino!
Tino!

Yeah? While you've been out fisting mental orientals and drinking craft beer we've been here taking the urine out of Sheng and staring in disbelief at sean's claims to have slept with at least 100 women.

We win.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:You're all
A bunch of turds
I've been fisting Chinese birds.
Tino!
Tino!

Himself
He tosses
While fisting Albatrosses
Tino!
Tino!

superflyweight wrote:Yeah?  While you've been out fisting mental orientals and drinking craft beer we've been here taking the urine out of Sheng and staring in disbelief at sean's claims to have slept with at least 100 women.  

We win.    

Sean doesn't know 100 women, let alone slept with that many.

I'd be surprised if he is past number 5.

You don't have to have known them to bone them.

seanmichaels wrote:You don't have to have known them to bone them.

They have to exist though.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:You don't have to have known them to bone them.

They have to exist though.

Are you at the airport or headed that way now?

He gets back Saturday Morning so I guess he'll be flying tomorrow evening our time. I hope Jackman is on the same flight.

seanmichaels wrote:He gets back Saturday Morning so I guess he'll be flying tomorrow evening our time. I hope Jackman is on the same flight.

Correct Seanus.

I am in my hotel room now. It is 23:45 and I an surrounded by Chinese gash. But they will have to make do with pleasuring each other as I am talking to my Culture Cup mates.

I'll get round to them shortly.

I hope J*ckman is on the same flight as well. I shall tell him what a c*nt he is.

Jeff hasn't taken the bait re the 100 club. Slightly disappointed.

You trying to acclimatize to the UK time or just unable to sleep without the knockout administered by jr?

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:You don't have to have known them to bone them.

They have to exist though.

In Sean's mind, they do.

DAVE667 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:You don't have to have known them to bone them.

They have to exist though.

In Sean's mind, they do.

It has to exist though.

ShahenshahG wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:You don't have to have known them to bone them.

They have to exist though.

In Sean's mind, they do.

It has to exist though.

In Sean's mind, it does.

DAVE667 wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:You don't have to have known them to bone them.

They have to exist though.

In Sean's mind, they do.

It has to exist though.

In Sean's mind, it does.

It has to exist though.

Ergo cogito cum

JuliusHMarx wrote:Ergo cogito cum

Exceptional

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:He gets back Saturday Morning so I guess he'll be flying tomorrow evening our time. I hope Jackman is on the same flight.

Correct Seanus.

I am in my hotel room now.  It is 23:45 and I an surrounded by Chinese gash.  But they will have to make do with pleasuring each other as I am talking to my Culture Cup mates.

I'll get round to them shortly.

I hope J*ckman is on the same flight as well.  I shall tell him what a c*nt he is.

Please repost the "H*gh J*ckman is a c*nt" post - he hasn't been nominated on the "... is a c*nt" site and I would like to do so on your behalf.  So far I've nominated QI, the angry Kiwi and Will Ferrell and, although I have had a fair amount of likes and comments, none of them has been selected for an article.

I need to take a look at this site at some point. My current nominees would be Lewis Hamilton and Brian May. Brian May is irritating me enormously at the minute.

Anita Dobson may be on my list, and Brian may.

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:He gets back Saturday Morning so I guess he'll be flying tomorrow evening our time. I hope Jackman is on the same flight.

Correct Seanus.

I am in my hotel room now.  It is 23:45 and I an surrounded by Chinese gash.  But they will have to make do with pleasuring each other as I am talking to my Culture Cup mates.

I'll get round to them shortly.

I hope J*ckman is on the same flight as well.  I shall tell him what a c*nt he is.

Please repost the "H*gh J*ckman is a c*nt" post - he hasn't been nominated on the "... is a c*nt" site and I would like to do so on your behalf.  So far I've nominated QI, the angry Kiwi and Will Ferrell and, although I have had a fair amount of likes and comments, none of them has been selected for an article.

There has been a few actually but I believe the last one of any note was thus:

Tino wrote:He wears sunglasses indoors, Serial. At night. At f*cking night time. For the f*cking sake of f*ck. Who does that? At f*cking night. What a massive b*llend.

And he swears loudly in the company of children. F*cking tw*t.

We can't disagree on this. I am definitely right on this issue.

He is a c*nting c*nt.

Feel free to nominate him.  And feel free to use some creative license if you like.  The more c*ntish you make him sound, the better.  I trust you.

If you get him to be selected for an article, then I will respect you just a tiny bit more than I do at the moment (which is a decent amount) and I will also send you a complimentary bottle of Hai Karate and a copy of Nigel Benn's autobiography (I have 2 so can spare one for you.  It is sh*t though.  Jeff will tell you).

First by the way.

Following on from my jellyfish eating adventures, I had snake last night.

Snake soup to be precise.

Once I had got through my initial issue with eating one of my favourite creatures on the planet, I got stuck in. I had to choose the snake which was slithering around in a wooden box, so I tried to pick the one that looked the most sad on the premise that it would object less to being eaten than some of the others. Plus, being eaten by a snake fan (expert even) has some sort of morality to it.

I can happily report that it tastes much better than jellyfish. In fact, I would go as far as saying it was very pleasant. Terrible cliché, but it really does taste like chicken. Bit tougher, but definitely has a chicken flavour to it. It was a water snake apparently. At least I think that's what the chap was saying.

I can recommend snake but not jellyfish.

Snake soup: 7.334/10
Jellyfish: 0.897/10

I do love you Tino. I hope you courted that snake good and proper before eating it out.

This kings of Leon has finally brought up a tolerable song

Bloody hell, Shah.

Sh*t the bed?

No. That's my wife

Which one?

I can't tell. She was so hungry she ate her identifying cow bell.

'sup geezers

rick_dagless wrote:'sup geezers

Morning RiCko.

Last day in the Orient mate? (so afternoon I guess)

Morning rick the cleric. Just keeping Tino company while he is processed through the Hong Kong criminal justice system and deported to blighty. How goes it?

Morning Shah all good here mate, it is Friday after all, and the clock keeps ticking. How goes you?

Glad to see you have got Tino's back, nothing soothes the customs guys like a twitchy Asian gentlement watching a white guy frantically as he goes through the checks, so good idea....

rick_dagless wrote:Last day in the Orient mate? (so afternoon I guess)

Yep, it's 14:45 here. Another couple of hours in the office, bit of food somewhere and then I'm heading off to the airport.

Looking forward to getting back.

You on countdown mode now? Starting to be rude and obnoxious to your colleagues or maintaining your professionalism to the very end?

rick_dagless wrote:Morning Shah all good here mate, it is Friday after all, and the clock keeps ticking.  How goes you?

Glad to see you have got Tino's back, nothing soothes the customs guys like a twitchy Asian gentlement watching a white guy frantically as he goes through the checks, so good idea....

I'll clench my fist and shout in jubilation as he makes it past security. Then start talking into a walkie Talkie

Tino wrote:You on countdown mode now? Starting to be rude and obnoxious to your colleagues or maintaining your professionalism to the very end?

Professional until Monday, at which point they can all f**k off and take their retarded questions with them, unless they are hot of course, questions will be prioritised as follows, 1) People I genuinely like 2) Girls who are hot 3) everyone else...

Shah wrote:I'll clench my fist and shout in jubilation as he makes it past security. Then start talking into a walkie Talkie

#

Good man, I shall await for the arrival on BBC news!

rick_dagless wrote:

Tino wrote:You on countdown mode now? Starting to be rude and obnoxious to your colleagues or maintaining your professionalism to the very end?

Professional until Monday, at which point they can all f**k off and take their retarded questions with them, unless they are hot of course, questions will be prioritised as follows, 1) People I genuinely like 2) Girls who are hot 3) everyone else...

Shah wrote:I'll clench my fist and shout in jubilation as he makes it past security. Then start talking into a walkie Talkie

#

Good man, I shall await for the arrival on BBC news!

Just await Tino's son inquiring about his will, then switch to the news.

Shah wrote:Just await Tino's son inquiring about his will, then switch to the news.

I have an alert set up for child crime near the home counties on my phone, so should be good

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx65lSHwJFk

Tino's brother

Real muthaphuckin g's

Still in bed. MRI on knee this morning, hope I go in feet first, feeling a bit groggy again this morning

rick_dagless wrote:1) People I genuinely like 2) Girls who are hot 3)

Surely you don't need option 1 if option 2 is girls who are hot?  They must be the same thing?

ShahenshahG wrote:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx65lSHwJFk

Tino's brother

Too thin to be my brother.

Tino wrote:Surely you don't need option 1 if option 2 is girls who are hot? They must be the same thing?

I know a few people who I choose to drink socially with who are male/ugly...

There are Girls who are hot who I am yet to meet...

Mind the windows Tino. wrote: a copy of Nigel Benn's autobiography (I have 2 so can spare one for you.  It is sh*t though.  Jeff will tell you).

I can confirm that Tina is correct in respect to the Benn book. I can highly recommend the George Kid Lavigne biography Muscle and Mayhem - The Saginaw Kid and the Fistic World of the 1890s, which is as excellent as its title is unnecessarily long.

Growlered.

Someone rustle up a quiz.

1. Which opera by Verdi is set in Egypt?
2. Whose symphony no. 41 is known as the Jupiter Symphony?
3. Which of Edward Elgar’s choral works was first performed at Birmingham Town Hall in 1900?
4. Apart from Luciano Pavorotti who were the other 2 of The Three Tenors (one point each)?
5. How many symphonies did Beethoven write?
6. What nationality was Gustav Holst?
7. The heckelphone and the cor anglais are members of which woodwind family?
8. Who was the principal conductor and music director of the City of Birmingham Symphony Orchestra from 1980-1998? He has been principal conductor of the Berlin Philharmonic since 2002.
9. Which female opera singer was born in New York in 1923, to Greek parents, and died in Paris in 1977?
10. Who wrote the ballets Swan Lake and The Nutcracker?

I can also confirm that Nigel Benn's autobiography is sh!t. As a huge Nigel Benn fan, my disappointment in this book was so great it made me a fan of Chris Eubank.

Can also confirm that, whilst very entertaining, the Lemmy autobiography "White Line Fever" is ironically also very disappointing. Given Lemmy's notorious reputation there seems to be about 0.098% of the mayhem and drug abuse he's famed for actually mentioned in the book. To be fair, there's still a fair bit but I do believe it's heavily sanitized even when you consider there's a bit where he mentions not being able to leave a casino when asked by one of the band as he was receiving a blow job under the table from an ardent female fan at the time.

Also unable to watch "Making a Murderer" for too long as it makes me want to smash the telly up in disbelief. Slowly slowly catchee monkey (or whatever other racist nonsense we say in those circumstances...as Sean says, it all sounds the same to him anyway)