Glasgow and Edinburgh: Ongoing Banter Thread XIII - Camp Crystal Meth

[A Simply Mesmeric Try]

First topic message reminder :

          
Edinburgh & Glasgow Warriors

A Not So Brief History of Time-Wasting   (click to show/hide):

Guinness Pro12

Edinburgh - Fixtures & Results   (click to show/hide):

Youtube playlist of all of Edinburgh's Pro12 action here.

Glasgow Warriors - Fixtures & Results   (click to show/hide):

Youtube playlist of all of Glasgow's Pro12 action here.

Europe

Champions Cup - Glasgow Warriors   (click to show/hide):

Challenge Cup - Edinburgh   (click to show/hide):

1872 Cup

Champions                Runner up
Edinburgh                  Glasgow Warriors
 

1872 Cup - Past Results   (click to show/hide):

The season has commenced

[Hazel Sapling]

When is Blake back? If he can be brought back, this is the time. Swinson on the bench covering the back 5 with the Namibian (is the Namibian able to play 8?). Back row of Harley, Brown and Wynne. Other option is Matt Smith who is assigned to the Glasgow Hawks.

[funnyExiledScot]

Perhaps Edinburgh can swap James Ritchie for Jonny Gray. You guys need a back rower, and we need a quality lock. Everyone wins.....

[RDW]

In other news, Kevin Bryce made his first professional appearance at tighthead on Friday, replacing Nel with around 15 minutes to go (I know, shock horror!)

I thought he actually did OK - he held his own against Cian Healy in the scrums and threw himself about around the pitch, with some effective pick and goes.  He's got a hell of a lot of bulk, and has put even more on to become TH apparently, so could offer us a different option at tighthead.

Very early days of course but he looked comfortable there, and at 28 and with a few years as a pro he's not a youngster. Hopefully we'll see him start against the Romanian team.

[BigGee]

Unfortunately it looks like Swinson and Brown got injured as well!

Nome of them, other than Ashe and Cummings should long term, but the volume of them might cause problems in the short term.

It does make the Blake move seem even more odd, you do wonder if there was more to it than was said, maybe he needed to go back for a while for some other reasons?

[des]

So anyone else think Hamish Watson should move to centre? He almost always breaks the first tackle but often gets turned over/held up in the heavy traffic he inevitably hits around the fringes. If he was running through backs more than forwards imagine the ground he'd make. I'd also like to be able to have him on at the same time as Hardie without having an overly light back row.

[BigGee]

Perhaps Edinburgh can swap James Ritchie for Jonny Gray. You guys need a back rower, and we need a quality lock. Everyone wins.....

Let me think about that one for a nano second.

Ok, no thanks!

[RDW]

So anyone else think Hamish Watson should move to centre?  He almost always breaks the first tackle but often gets turned over/held up in the heavy traffic he inevitably hits around the fringes.  If he was running through backs more than forwards imagine the ground he'd make.  I'd also like to be able to have him on at the same time as Hardie without having an overly light back row.

I say keep him where he is.  He doesn't have the distribution to play there (I don't think I've ever seen him pass!) and 13 is the most difficult position on the pitch in terms of defencive positioning. If he was shipped out to 13 he'd have much less influence over a game too - he'd probably touch the ball half the number of times as he currently does.

He was at his barnstorming best against Leinster but I do think we could be more intelligent with how we use him, and he needs to learn himself how he can be more effective.  The problem is, he is so incredibly competitive and determined that he always wants the ball and always wants to carry hard and take everyone on.

He is devastating in broken play but as you said he gets too easily turned over in traffic.  He perhaps need to run support lines more and look for offloads, or we need to work him in to the attacking play to be further out so he's attacking the outside shoulder of a stretched defensive line. He needs to carry lower when in contact too as teams are now targeting him.

Basically he showed up well against Leinster because we were getting quick ball and developing phases - the more we do that the more effective he'll be.

[Hazel Sapling]

Okay so for a pack against Ulster:
Reid
Flynn
Fagerson
Petersen
Gray
Harley
Smith
Wynne

Bench: MacArthur/Malcolm, Allan, Puafisi, K Mcdonald, Uanivi (I would say Vernon but he is crocked as well; Uanivi's wiki page suggests he plays flanker))

[funnyExiledScot]

It's a shame we can't reschedule the 1872 Cup games for the next couple of weeks. I'd fancy our pack against that shower.

[George Carlin]

Where is everyone getting these injury reports from?

Apart from Schiz, who I am assuming gets them from the voices in his head.

[Hazel Sapling]

I think that pack would give Edinburgh a bit of a go if you are sans CDP and Manu. Be interesting to see how it would get on against Ulster (who, unfortunately, have Henderson and VDM coming back). The only issue is the lack of ball carrying (Fagerson, Gray, Wynne?, Smith?). Main reason I am tempted to start Uanivi.

[funnyExiledScot]

I think that pack would give Edinburgh a bit of a go if you are sans CDP and Manu. Be interesting to see how it would get on against Ulster (who, unfortunately, have Henderson and VDM coming back). The only issue is the lack of ball carrying (Fagerson, Gray, Wynne?, Smith?). Main reason I am tempted to start Uanivi.

Nonsense. Haven't you read the latest memo? Bradbury is World Class.

[BigGee]

Where is everyone getting these injury reports from?

Apart from Schiz, who I am assuming gets them from the voices in his head.

From Toonie's musing about the game, it was on the warriors website.

[lostinwales]

Thanks for changing the name of the thread. The name now is what I always expected to read....

[George Carlin]

https://www.606v2.com/t64053-glasgow-warriors-v-ulster-rugby-23-september

[R!skysports]

Perhaps Edinburgh can swap James Ritchie for Jonny Gray. You guys need a back rower, and we need a quality lock. Everyone wins.....

Maybe it is time to wrap up the experiment that is Edinburgh rugby and just focus on the real team from Glasgow

[Hazel Sapling]

I disagree Risky. There is a need for a development team

[funnyExiledScot]

Perhaps Edinburgh can swap James Ritchie for Jonny Gray. You guys need a back rower, and we need a quality lock. Everyone wins.....

Maybe it is time to wrap up the experiment that is Edinburgh rugby and just focus on the real team from Glasgow  

Well it would certainly help Glasgow actually win some silverware......

[jimbopip]

Like the Pro 12 championship?

really FES,

No, we need to keep the MFL if only to remind us just how rancid rugby used to be before Toonie came along.

[RDW]

That's a bite FES!

[George Carlin]

Perhaps Edinburgh can swap James Ritchie for Jonny Gray. You guys need a back rower, and we need a quality lock. Everyone wins.....

Maybe it is time to wrap up the experiment that is Edinburgh rugby and just focus on the real team from Glasgow  

Well it would certainly help Glasgow actually win some silverware......

Edinburgh's best ever trophy shown here:

Evening Times Golden Turd Awards are precious indeed.

[funnyExiledScot]

I have a loo just like that....

[George Carlin]

I have a loo just like that....

Speaking of places to flush excrement:
https://www.606v2.com/t64065-munster-v-edinburgh-24-september

[A Simply Mesmeric Try]

Glasgow Warriors sign ‘human locomtoive’ back-row Langilangi Haupeakui

USA International (1 cap)

Scotsman article

Glasgow Warriors have secured the signature of the American international back-row forward Langilangi Haupeakui, subject to a work permit.

Haupeakui is of Tongan heritage with just one US Test cap to his name but has shot to stardom in the nascent American Pro League and boasts outstanding raw potential. Standing 6ft 1in he tops the scales at an impressive 18½ stones but it is his pace off the mark and his footwork that set him apart. A No 8 by trade, although there is a body of opinion that sees him fetching up at loosehead, his pick and drive off the back of the set scrum is a thing to behold unless, of course, you are tasked with stopping the human locomotive.

With Adam Ashe sitting out the first half of the season after foot surgery, Glasgow Warriors have turned to Haupeakui. He came to the game late, playing American football at university before switching to rugby. He was not even included in the initial Pro League rosters but was a late addition to Sacramento’s squad and emerged as one of the league’s stand-out players.

His experience of first-class rugby is modest to say the least but such are his physical assets that Haupeakui had already been approached by Harlequins, who held a pre-season training camp in Northern California this summer, before Glasgow secured his signature. It may have helped that Haupeakui plays his club rugby with the East Palo Alto Razorbacks alongside another USA Eagle, Folau Niua, who had one season with the Warriors a few years back. The Razorbacks’ Facebook page suggests the club fields some seriously big men.

Haupeakui grew up in East Palo Alto, half way between San Francisco and San Jose which, according to one website is “a small town noted for murder, gangs and poverty” and a fifth of all the town’s inhabitants live below the poverty line. Haupeakui has been described as a “diamond in the rough” and certainly the body art and background suggest a tough upbringing a million miles removed from Scotstoun’s salubrious suburbs.

It is fair to say that Glasgow’s latest acquisition has a period of adjustment ahead of him both on and off the field. The deal has not been without controversy since Haupeakui was said to be already contracted to the USA Pro League when he signed forms with Glasgow. The player was supposed to have given a 30-day notice period to the Pro League before entering any new agreement. He will need expert conditioning and education in the Warriors’ ways but Glasgow have unearthed a brute of a ball carrier even if he is still in kindergarten class as far as his rugby education goes.

[RDW]

Are they gang tattoos....?

6ft 1 and 18.5st - he sounds like he's in the Stefan Armitage mould of physique.

Also the fact that he struggled to get picked for the American pro league isn't exactly a ringing endorsement of his abilities.

[George Carlin]

Are they gang tattoos....?

6ft 1 and 18.5st - he sounds like he's in the Stefan Armitage mould of physique.

Also the fact that he struggled to get picked for the American pro league isn't exactly a ringing endorsement of his abilities.

Okay, so he wouldn't fit into the Stockbridge supper club circuit but nobody's perfect. Apart from Blake Lively.

Depends how you read the report but I don't think we can assume he struggled to get picked. I read: "He was not even included in the initial Pro League rosters but was a late addition to Sacramento’s squad and emerged as one of the league’s stand-out players" as more of a commentary that he came onto the scene late.

Still waiting for the Warriors official press release for this guy but you can't deny that Toonie can pick em. Perhaps Joss Strauss resigned because he couldn't take any more sledging on these boards.

[George Carlin]

Here's the big feller. You can't deny he has a touch of the Vunipolas about him:

[RDW]

My personal favourite being the one of him tackling the guy who didn't even have the ball!

But again lets not forget the Mike Penn rule - anyone can look good in a highlights reel.

Talking of random wingers with good highlights reels - Edinburgh signed Aussie wing Alex Northam and nothing has been heard of him since!

[Hazel Sapling]

That American from the sounds of it has to make a career in rugby or else end up stuck in the gangs. At least Glasgow is a hard city that has people with strange tattoos.

Seems to be an okay carrier without being overly effective. Will need to work on offloading in contact. Feel it is a skill that Strauss has lost and Denton never had. Peterson was seen as a curious decision when signed and has turned into a decent squad player. This guy is probably the same.

[George Carlin]

Forgot about that fraudulent misrepresentation case 'Edinburgh Rugby v Mike Penn, 2013'.

He'll certainly have to stop jumping into contact but the point (and it comes out in the Hootsmon article) that this guy is the sort of player who, with the benefit of technical training and a professional physical conditioning programme, could be very good indeed. If his hands are like anything other than stone cold jubblies, he'll have a better offloading game than Dozer.

[funnyExiledScot]

This guy looks mince, however, based on the tattoo alone, he'll be scarier to face than Ryan Wilson (although equally likely to land a cheap shot off the ball).

This is proper "diamond in the rough" stuff from the Glasgow scouts. I'll be seriously impressed if this bloke goes further than holding tackle bags. That all said, the description of East Palo Alto (“a small town noted for murder, gangs and poverty and a fifth of all the town’s inhabitants live below the poverty line") suggests to me that Glasgow is probably a "good fit".

[funnyExiledScot]

My personal favourite being the one of him tackling the guy who didn't even have the ball!

I liked his run-in try, where he practically needed resuscitation under the posts having had to run half the length. I can relate to that.

[RDW]

My personal favourite being the one of him tackling the guy who didn't even have the ball!

I liked his run-in try, where he practically needed resuscitation under the posts having had to run half the length. I can relate to that.

That reminds me of American Football games when a player who doesn't normally ever touch the ball ends up catching it and has to run - they genuinely give them oxygen afterwards!

[EWT Spoons]

This guy looks mince, however, based on the tattoo alone, he'll be scarier to face than Ryan Wilson (although equally likely to land a cheap shot off the ball)..

I watched a bit of the pro league last season and the standard wasn't the highest, Sacramento were also one of the worst teams in the league. I've not got high hopes for him, but maybe if he gets some decent coaching etc he could be an option against the weaker teams in the league. Hopefully he proves me wrong.

[funnyExiledScot]

This guy looks mince, however, based on the tattoo alone, he'll be scarier to face than Ryan Wilson (although equally likely to land a cheap shot off the ball)..

I watched a bit of the pro league last season and the standard wasn't the highest, Sacramento were also one of the worst teams in the league.  I've not got high hopes for him, but maybe if he gets some decent coaching etc he could be an option against the weaker teams in the league.  Hopefully he proves me wrong.

That probably includes us, in which case more than happy for this guy to have 80 minutes in December against Du Preez.

[George Carlin]

This guy looks mince, however, based on the tattoo alone, he'll be scarier to face than Ryan Wilson (although equally likely to land a cheap shot off the ball)..

I watched a bit of the pro league last season and the standard wasn't the highest, Sacramento were also one of the worst teams in the league.  I've not got high hopes for him, but maybe if he gets some decent coaching etc he could be an option against the weaker teams in the league.  Hopefully he proves me wrong.

Agreed. Let's give him a chance. Greg/Oscar/Jeff would have warned Toonie if he was as likely to be bad as the average Edinburgh player.

[R!skysports]

This guy looks mince, however, based on the tattoo alone, he'll be scarier to face than Ryan Wilson (although equally likely to land a cheap shot off the ball)..

I watched a bit of the pro league last season and the standard wasn't the highest, Sacramento were also one of the worst teams in the league.  I've not got high hopes for him, but maybe if he gets some decent coaching etc he could be an option against the weaker teams in the league.  Hopefully he proves me wrong.

Agreed. Let's give him a chance. Greg/Oscar/Jeff would have warned Toonie if he was as likely to be bad as the average Edinburgh player.

The first warning sign would have been Edinburgh signing him - then making him slower and even less effective

[funnyExiledScot]

This guy looks mince, however, based on the tattoo alone, he'll be scarier to face than Ryan Wilson (although equally likely to land a cheap shot off the ball)..

I watched a bit of the pro league last season and the standard wasn't the highest, Sacramento were also one of the worst teams in the league.  I've not got high hopes for him, but maybe if he gets some decent coaching etc he could be an option against the weaker teams in the league.  Hopefully he proves me wrong.

Agreed. Let's give him a chance. Greg/Oscar/Jeff would have warned Toonie if he was as likely to be bad as the average Edinburgh player.

The first warning sign would have been Edinburgh signing him - then making him slower and even less effective

Hey, we pride ourselves on making players slower and less effective. It's our USP.

[GLove39]

Least inspiring team talk ever!?



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpqYMS1VN6Y

[Tattie Scones RRN]

Jesus that's terrible if it's actual footage. I guess not considering Russell is smirking a lot.

[GLove39]

Jesus that's terrible if it's actual footage. I guess not considering Russell is smirking a lot.

Thankfully just made for this video!
I'd like to think Laidlaw's actual talks would be a bit more passionate.

[funnyExiledScot]

None of this would have happened in Al Kellock's days of Churchillian rhetoric!!


We shall go on to the end. We shall fight miss tackles in France, we shall fight stand by the side of rucks on the seas and oceans, we shall fight shout "come on lads" with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall rely on Jonny Gray and Rob Harley to defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight knock-on on the beaches, we shall fight receive pointless yellow cards on the landing grounds, we shall fight moan to the ref in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight be knocked back in the tackle in the hills; we shall never surrender (apart from twice a year in the 1872 Cup).

[Tattie Scones RRN]

Made the hairs on the back of my neck lie down and fall asleep.

[IanBru]

Jesus that's terrible if it's actual footage. I guess not considering Russell is smirking a lot.

Thankfully just made for this video!
I'd like to think Laidlaw's actual talks would be a bit more passionate.

Got to think they'd be better than Sergio Parisse: "OK guys, we're at home, the pitch and ball are dry, it's sunny, the wind's at our backs, and Scotland have been so blighted by swine flu that we're basically facing the West of Scotland U16 2nd XV. We're never going to have a better shot than this. I... [fights back tears] I bloody need this one. So...

...just be good. For the love of God be good."

[Tattie Scones RRN]

Jesus that's terrible if it's actual footage. I guess not considering Russell is smirking a lot.

Thankfully just made for this video!
I'd like to think Laidlaw's actual talks would be a bit more passionate.

Got to think they'd be better than Sergio Parisse: "OK guys, we're at home, the pitch and ball are dry, it's sunny, the wind's at our backs, and it's Scotland have been so blighted by swine flu that we're basically facing the West of Scotland U16 2nd XV. We're never going to have a better shot than this. I... [fights back tears] I bloody need this one. So...

...just be good. For the love of God be good."

You didn't need half of that Bru...

[Nematode]

Least inspiring team talk ever!?



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpqYMS1VN6Y

This Lions team talk is pretty meh compared to Laidlaw and co...

[jimbopip]

Since our Eastern Brethren look like being in for another miserable Friday night....
I stumbled across an old episode of Porridge the other evening.

Mackay: Is this a show of prisoner solidarity, Fletcher?

Fletcher No, Mr Mackay, working class solidarity.

Mackay Oh, you consider yourself one of the working class do you?

Fletcher I did. But then I went to Glasgow for the day. Now I think I'm middle class.

[George Carlin]

Didn't get to see the Glasgow game but I was expecting defeat as soon as I saw the team sheets.

How was it? I read that after 60 minutes we had received 38% of possession which really reflected what I thought about so many injuries in the pack. Should I be disappointed? Or pleased that we managed to get anything out of the game at all?

[RDW]

Well Glasgow's pack was already weakened, then within 30 minutes 3 of them were subbed off!

[BigGee]

Didn't get to see the Glasgow game but I was expecting defeat as soon as I saw the team sheets.

How was it? I read that after 60 minutes we had received 38% of possession which really reflected what I thought about so many injuries in the pack. Should I be disappointed? Or pleased that we managed to get anything out of the game at all?

To be honest, Glasgow probably had the better of the second half after taking some pasting in the first. The young kids did brilliantly but the Ulster pack just had that edge at the breakdown and the whole team defended brilliantly. We did well to get the point at the end of the day and hopefully we live to fight another day.

Hard to see Ulster not being in the top 4 again this year on that sort of a performance though. Piatau looks frighteningly good!

[Sponsored content]