Greatest commentator's lines.

Watching the Llandovery vs Tonmawr highlights I heard a great saying by the commentator. As the number 8 made a break, he was described as a 'Moose with a migraine'... Now, I don't understand it, but it's a phenomonal little metaphor. It's up there with Cian Healy being described as a 'Baby bull elephant' and Craig Quinnell aka 'Mad Hippo'.
So any of you wish to share? Can be from any sport.

Bill McClaren

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/rugbyunion/international/scotland/7027996/Bill-McLarens-most-famous-quotes.html

The bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i8qMq8y86Fk

LondonTiger wrote:Bill McClaren
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/rugbyunion/international/scotland/7027996/Bill-McLarens-most-famous-quotes.html

Reading that again made me realise just how good he was. Along with Richie Benaud the best english speaking commentators in the world of any sport.

Cliff morgan's commentary for Gareth Edwards try against the barbarians. From the moment Bennett gets the ball. Pure poetry ending with what a score. Goosebumps.

Stuart Davies Rugby Pundit...Dragons home game Mike Hall in the studio.

Stuart sees the opportunity for a joke at Mr Halls expense .....as the Cheerleaders trot off the pitch at half time .something along the lines of

"Im sure I just saw Mike Hall on the touchline applauding those girls off the field and after the procedure he's just had you would have thought that was the last thing on his mind!!"

I nearly dropped my naan bread

digging like a demented mole

that tackle will put him in ward 4
i hope not, thats the maternity ward (spelling)

The full thing is;

- "Oh, mercy me! What a tackle! That could've put him in Ward 4!"
- "I hope not Bill... that's a maternity ward!"

thats it thanks notch- was on rugby challenge and i knew it was a classic- just couldnt remember it all!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S617AieOPJo

I'll leave this here shall I?

For me, in recent years, it has to be the exuberant, effervescent - Mark Robson. A Norn-Iron commentator.

"Ooooooooooooo Driscooooooll... what a try! Ireland's genius. He's brimming with BODliness. " Near pished meself laffing.

Anything but anything by Bill McLaren or John Arlott. My all time faves for each, but not necessarily their most famous bons mots:

BM: (after yet another collapsed scrum) 'aye ... who knows what goes on in the cloistered dungeons of the front row?'

JA: 'now it's Lillie running in to bowl, like Groucho Marx chasing a pretty waitress.'

Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant.

David Coleman was the Master.

That's the fastest time ever run - but it's not as fast as the world record.
Don't tell those coming in the final result of that fantastic match, but let's just have another look at Italy's winning goal.
For those of you watching who do not have television sets, live commentary is on Radio 2.
This is a truly international field, no Britons involved.
Both of the Villa scorers - Withe and Mortimer - were born in Liverpool as was the Villa manager Ron Saunders who was born in Birkenhead.
He's 31 this year - last year he was 30.
He won the bronze medal in the 1976 Olympics so he's used to being out in front.
We estimate, and this isn't an estimation, that Greta Waltz is 80 seconds behind.
Linford Christie's got a habit of pulling it out when it matters most.
The late start is due to the time.
He's got his hands on his knees and holds his head in despair.
He's even smaller in real life than he is on the track.
This could be a repeat of what will happen in the European games next week.
It's a battle with himself and with the ticking fingers of the clock.
Here are some names to look forward to - perhaps in the future.
In the Moscow Olympics Lasse Viren came in fifth and ran a champions race.
He just can't believe what's not happening to him.
One of the great unknown champions because very little is known about him.
There'll be only one winner now - in every sense.
He is accelerating all the time. The last lap was run in 64 seconds and the one before that in 62.
The big Cuban opened his legs and showed his class.

Its Alan Patridge on acid.

Micheal O Muircheartaigh (gaelic sports commentator).

He grabs the sliotar, on the 50... he's on the 40...he's on the 30...hes on the ground....

Teddy McCarthy to John McCarthy, no relation. John McCarthy back to Teddy McCarthy, still no relation.

Pat Fox has it on his hurley and is motoring well now. But here comes Joe Rabbitte hot on his tail. I've seen it all now - a Rabbitte chasing a Fox around Croke Park!

Colin Corkery on the 45 lets go with the right boot. It's over the bar. This man shouldn't be playing football. He's made an almost Lazarus-like recovery from a heart condition. Lazarus was a great man, but he couldn't kick points like Colin Corkery.

Sean Og O hAilpin...his father's from Fermanagh, his mother's from Fiji, neither one of them a hurling stronghold

Sin é wrote:Micheal O Muircheartaigh (gaelic sports commentator).

He grabs the sliotar, on the 50... he's on the 40...he's on the 30...hes on the ground....

Teddy McCarthy to John McCarthy, no relation. John McCarthy back to Teddy McCarthy, still no relation.

Pat Fox has it on his hurley and is motoring well now. But here comes Joe Rabbitte hot on his tail. I've seen it all now - a Rabbitte chasing a Fox around Croke Park!

Colin Corkery on the 45 lets go with the right boot. It's over the bar. This man shouldn't be playing football. He's made an almost Lazarus-like recovery from a heart condition. Lazarus was a great man, but he couldn't kick points like Colin Corkery.

Sean Og O hAilpin...his father's from Fermanagh, his mother's from Fiji, neither one of them a hurling stronghold

Brilliant.Just brilliant.

Not 'great' but amusing nonetheless:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HF9V4avIxsU

I particularly like the last one:

"Paul Tito...like a blind man in a brothel - just left groping!"

Always remember my granded getting the 'Coleman Balls' books for Xmas and they were a great read and laugh.

From rugby persepctive then it has to be the legend that is Bill Mc, he describe CQ as a runaway hippo, Jiffy and Merlin the Magician, Simon Geoghan as a mad octopus and so on.

During a close-up of Wahl Bartman's face & ears the commentator (think it was Mexted) said "looks like a VW Beetle with the doors open".

About a decade ago when Alan Tongue (Canberra) tackled Adam Dykes (Cronulla) in an NRL match

"...Tongue all over Dykes..."

* * *

"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle" -- Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach

<You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle" -- Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach> lol

Can't remember it at mo, sure someone will, but Alfie said something similar during his captains speech ahead of the 2nd Lions test in 05

McLaren's "it's high enough, and it's long enough, and IT'S STRAIGHT ENOUGH".

God I miss him.

That sounds like Frank Hyde - "It's high enough, it's long enough... and it's straight between the posts..."
Or alternatively "... and it's.... just wide..."

I can still hear him saying things like "and he's seekin' amb'lance attention" when some guy would run onto the field to attend an injured player with the 'magic sponge'.

Almost anything from Brian Moore:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTQWT-B0EBw

Muzza Mexted. If we look at the slow-motion, the ball seems to be coming out more slowly or words to that muppety effect...

One of my favourites from Jiffy "He's got hands like a digital watch"

Sín - I'm glad you mentioned the Gaelic sport. I really enjoy the commentators over there cause they always manage to give you a little bit of a biography a player as they're talking about what's going on.

I enjoyed when a player (think it was italian) got yellow carded on his birthday and Jiffy said "he'll have time to read his birthday cards now"

Also liked Brian Moores "give that man a chocolate egg"

For just a brilliant moment described beautifully I love "to put the seal on the win, to put the cream on the grand slam cake"

Murray Mexted, for all his faults, is certainly the king of the misquoted moments:

"Andy Ellis - the 21 year old, who turned 22 a few weeks ago"

"He scored that try after only 22 seconds - totally against the run of play."

"I would not say he (Rico Gear) is the best left winger in the Super 14, but there are none better."

"Well, either side could win it, or it could be a draw."

"Strangely, in slow motion replay, the ball seemed to hang in the air for even longer."

"There's a couple of Hores on display tonight" (the brothers Charlie Hore (Highlanders) and Andrew Hore
(Hurricanes) playing on opposing teams)

"As you know, I've been pumping Marty Leslie for a couple of years now."

"You don't like to see hookers going down on players like that."

"This game is a white wash, but the All Blacks are black, these no white teams!"

"I haven't had a knee operation on any other part of my body."

"He's looking for some meaningful penetration into the backline."

"Spencer's running across field calling out, 'come inside me, come inside me.'"

"I can tell you it's a magnificent sensation when the gap opens up like that and you just burst right through."

"I don't like this new law, because your first instinct when you see a man on the ground is to go down on him"

"Darryl Gibson has been quite magnificent coming inside Andrew Mehrtens, and I'm looking forward to seeing more of the same today."

"There's nothing that a tight forward likes more than a loosie right up his backside"

"Its all tied up at 14-13"

"Trapped like a shag on the rocks" (RWC07 Georgia vs Argentina)

"He ran like a bat" (RWC07 Georgia vs Argentina)

“There’s lots of hooters over here Nisbo.”

"He who hesitates......is lost."

"Both sides are here to play rugby."

A Sky TV producer was conducting a sound test before the last Springbok test at Carisbrook...

"Murray can you hear me?....Murray can you hear me?" Murray: "No."

"The turf here (Newlands) never took properly and it isn't very well rooted...in fact you could say it is rooted.....did I just say that?". (N.B. rooted means something similar to screwed, a root in New Zealand/Australian slang means sex)

"Paul Tito looked like a blind man in a brothel, just left groping."

"The lineouts of course are a great artform, I've always fantisized about lineouts, even in my sleep sometimes..."

"Well it was a great kick. We know Matthew Cooper's got tremendous rhythm now, he's smooth, smooth as a baby's bum... By Joves, that didn't slip out did it?"

"It's very easy to be exposed as an open side (flanker) if you don't have your mate up your backside"

"Well it still does it for me, the tingle up the spine, the tingle in the loins"

"Isn't that an interesting scene, the two coaches, Nick Mallett and John Hart. By Joves times have changed haven't they. In the old days they'd be punching each other in that position." - (The two former coaches of the respective South African and New Zealand rugby teams were shown seated together in a grandstand).

After a 2005 British & Irish Lions series match, talking about referee Stuart Dickinson, Tony Johnson states "Stuart Dickinson had far too much to say in this match", then Murray replies "Stuart Dickinson's a bit of a dick, I think"

"And he kicks it with his left-handed foot"

Eleven minutes into the Wellington versus Canterbury game 2009 Murray announced "There's a lot to happen in this game yet

England, what have you done ? And Wales what are you doing ?

Eddie Butler, Twickenham 2008

Notch wrote:The full thing is;

- "Oh, mercy me! What a tackle! That could've put him in Ward 4!"
- "I hope not Bill... that's a maternity ward!"

That was a line on Jonah Lomu rugby on the ps1. Oh the memories.

munkian wrote:

England, what have you done ? And Wales what are you doing ?

Eddie Butler, Twickenham 2008

Not very often I listen to anything Butler has to say but I do like that one

Not one of the greatest lines, but one that has stuck with me since the mid 80's. I think it was Graham Thorn or Keith Quinn after a Craig Green try (maybe!).

'Rugby's a simple game. It's about 14 men playing 15 men, to give one man a yard of space.'


In the same era, Ron O'Regan commenting on an Kiwis v Kangaroos League game.

'All NZ have got to do is score more points than Australia.' Genius.

Can't for the life of me remember who the commentator was but Gethin Jenkins's try against Namibia when he did the side step, hand off, dummy pass then charge to the line:

"He can smell the burger van on the tryline!"

I laughed so hard I was leaking like the Diana memorial!

chewed_mintie wrote:

"As you know, I've been pumping Marty Leslie for a couple of years now."

"I haven't had a knee operation on any other part of my body."

"Spencer's running across field calling out, 'come inside me, come inside me.'"

A Sky TV producer was conducting a sound test before the last Springbok test at Carisbrook...

"Murray can you hear me?....Murray can you hear me?" Murray: "No."

"And he kicks it with his left-handed foot"

Mintie, those are priceless! Thank you!

LemonyVodka5 wrote:Can't for the life of me remember who the commentator was but Gethin Jenkins's try against Namibia when he did the side step, hand off, dummy pass then charge to the line:

"He can smell the burger van on the tryline!"

I laughed so hard I was leaking like the Diana memorial!

You're one of my favourite posters.

Cheers very muchly like Glas, I take that as a huge compliment considering this will only be my 19th post....(can it be so many? I remember the first like it was only a couple of weeks ago.......oh )

Unless it was sarcasm in which case I shall stalk legally seek out your parents and write a very strongly worded and disapproving missive to them using my red bic biro, underlining and italics and excessive amounts of punctuation marks!!!!!!

"This is O'Driscoll. Oooh he's going! Ooooh he's gone through! O'Driscoll! For the posts! Brian O'Driscoll! Ooh you BEAUTY!! That. Is. In. Credible"

Can anyone name the match?

Berrick Barnes who got the knob i mean nod over Anthoney Fa'inga today - another reason why ITV shouldn't broadcast the RWC

Feckless Rogue wrote:"This is O'Driscoll. Oooh he's going! Ooooh he's gone through! O'Driscoll! For the posts! Brian O'Driscoll! Ooh you BEAUTY!! That. Is. In. Credible"

Can anyone name the match?

The match is the first Lions Test versus the Wallabies in 2001. The commentator is Miles Harrison and he's no good.

Anyone watching the bath biarritz game?

They didn't agree with every decision Roland made in the world cup final but he's been excellent today!!!

i'm not sure as to who the commentators are but

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94YiGIte0BA "he's like a frog in a sock when you give him room" talking bout shane williams is a classic

also on rugby 08 "kelleher whips it out" aint bad