WWE RAW REPORT (WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS)

We kick off Raw with King in the ring talking up Fandango and his dancing followed by Jericho and his dancing in front of millions around the world! It seems we could be in line for some kind of dance off tonight...for the first time ever! Well I think he means between those two as it has definitely been done before..

20 minutes later and after barely any actual dancing...the segment descends into an attack on Jericho from Fandango after a feigned injury by Mr Glitter Pant's dance partner! Angle was awful but at least it gave Fan Man a chance to get the upper hand on Jericho in a new way..actually I think that has kind of been done as well so all in all a crappy angle!

The next 15 minutes contained the following:

Recap of Cena/Ryback incident last week follows all of this....there was one at the start but we all wanted more so they gave it to us!

Brock v Triple H...two build ups. One of him trashing office...2nd of him breaking HHH...both in first 35 mins.

Few advert breaks taking up approx 3 mins each.

2 Squash matches...Ryback v Ryder (Over within 3 minutes) then Funkadactals beaten by Primetime within 2 minutes of bell being rung!

Another advert - 3 minutes immediate CD Plug!! Airbourne I think was the title or band...may have something to do with Evan...that would be my guess since he hasn't been up to much else lately!

More talking - Teddy 'Tag Team' Long - Ziggler unable to compete - Swaggers right hand man stumbles through his words!! Then Langston and AJ come out
claiming Swagger should be fired. Taggy Long says Dolph wont be stripped but Del Rio v Swagger in NO 1 Contender match I QUIT stipulation! (Can't wait to see this match..going to be great seeing these go at for the first time)

This was another 3 minute segment followed by....couple of plugs for later.

1.46 am - Kofi v ....oh wait all will be revealed after, you guessed it another break!!

1.49 am ...3 minutes and we are back...right lets get down to some proper wrestling now...oh no hold on another recap from last weeks RAW about The Shield!

BREAKING NEWS - AMBROSE V KOFI KINGSTON FOR US TITLE!!

Finally we see who Kofi is facing....SANDOW! That can only mean one thing..a win for Sandow! Pardon...what do you mean he almost always loses these days...Ok scratch that I'm hedging my bets on Kofi then!!

Match Time 1.52 till 1.55! And the 3 minute theme continues tonight with a very quick victory for Kofi Kingston!

Backstage Henry is heading out for another match....nah I'm kidding probably a challenge....ill let you know after this BREAK!! Because we haven't had enough of them! And were back at 1.59am (Honestly I didn't even notice that was a 3 minute block then)!

Mark Henry is in the Ring now ready for his match... Oh nope he's being interviewed by Josh Matthews....sorry my bad I really thought he was in a match for a moment..

Video Time!! How did this match come about..well if you missed last weeks enthralling RAW then your about to find out!! DONT LOOK AWAY ELSE YOU'LL MISS IT...Though for those who do i am sure it will be on SMACKDOWN FRIDAY!

Some tough talking from Henry who informs us that he will drag Sheamus around the ring at Extreme Rules...in case you doubt him then he has something to show you...ill give you a clue it appears on a titatron and usually involves a recap. YES YOUR RIGHT ITS A VIDEO!

Josh asks if Henry can tell us how he will win on Sunday..and Henry tells us even better I will show you!! OMG Moment...its not a video..instead he is strapping up Josh and using him as the example.Perfect practice for Sheamus I am sure you would agree. I have to say..I'm pretty sure we saw a recap from a past JBL match at GAB before this segment showing us how you won this match but Henry may have missed it so don't blame him...he is just making sure us fans properly realise the rules behind this match!

Henry now calls out Sheamus!! It's about to kick off fella's..few moments go by with no sign of the Irish Hooligan/Comedian ....Henry announces...'I Haven't got all day'...good because to be frank I'm shattered and haven't got all night)... Just as my eyes were closing Sheamus music hits and out he comes...Informs us that he will still compete at Extreme Rules..Then Mark does some poetry of kind 'Doing a lot of talking..not much walking...come down to the ring ill give you some bling'...actually he didn't say the last bit but you get the point..

Sheamus comes down and goes to get in the ring..Henry stands with the bull rope in hand...bit of name calling..Sheamus has something under the ring though...and it's not Hornswoggle..its a bull rope..he hits the ring..Henry takes a few shots and gives a couple but then leaves.Sheamus is left standing tall in the ring!!

I know what your thinking...Henry is supposed to be pretty hard but I have pulled a truck and used to be hit with a bull rope and I promise you that the 2nd one hurts much worse so I too would have retreated!!

Next we get another recap...of.....wait for it...BROCK!! This time showing him destroying Vince...I'm getting the awful feeling that this one way build up of how nasty Brock has been could lead to HHH winning the rubber match! Hmmmm!

WORLD PREMIERE NEXT OF A WWE STUDIO FILM WHICH CAN ONLY MEAN ONE THING...RANDY ORTON AS SUPERMAN...hold on apparently I got that wrong..let me rewind..Oh sorry ermm it's 12 Rounds Round 2 Reloaded..Iv'e done the sums and I think that's actually 36 Rounds...12 x 2 + a Reload so another 12 ...yep that's 36 Rounds. I'm sure you'll agree that is way more catchy!

And now because we had a 10 minute segment without any stop gaps my brain is struggling to function so WWE have kindly given us a break! Phew!!

Ok I have come back from making a tea and I seem to have come in as Orton enters the ring...please someone tell me I haven't missed anything! I would dread to think that was the one time they came back from a break and something major was happening..

It appears Orton is taking on Cesaro...so I must have missed his entry..either that or he was waiting in the ring when we returned but that can't be right because WWE wouldn't do that to one of the best wrestlers and prospects on their roster..would they?!

Good paced match...as we near the end we go from Cesaro on the outside about to be put between them and planted to him rolling up Randy for a 1.....2.....noooo so close I can't believe it I thought he had him then. I can't hide my disappointment!! Hands on face time oh so close...

Wait Orton's music has hit...he's won...when did that happen?! I literally had my hands on my eyes for all of 5 secs!! How the heck..hmm the only thing I can think is that Orton might of hit the RKO from nowhere..but I'm going to have to read that on Bleacher to confirm tomorrow! I'll get back to you!!

So after that enthralling back and forth match (Yes I know you watched it and it was quick and over in a couple of minutes but those who didn't don't know that so just shhhh ok'!!) we head to a break!! For those who didn't go to the toilet 7 minutes ago...11 minutes, 15 minutes ago or 18 mins ago NOW IS YOUR CHANCE ..don't pass it up because I am pretty sure this is the last break now!!

We come back from the commericials and 3MB are in the ring awaiting there opponent...is there any point in that guy even coming out! As if they will get the better of any member of 3MB! It is a returning MIZ..that's right he has been off our screens for quite some time..well a few weeks since losing his Intercontinental title to Wade Barrett following his lengthy reign after taking it at Wrestlemania! Listen 1 night is lengthy..myself and Miz don't care what you people think.

Miz builds some momentum after Heath gets the better of the opening exchanges...top rope forearm smash and now he looks for the Figure 4 Lock..but to no avail as Heath gets to the outside..then climbs the ropes but Miz gets on top...punches him a few times before launching him into 2MB..back in the ring and Miz loses the jacket WOOOO's a bit then locks in the Figure 4 Leg Lock and Heath taps. Ok only 1 of those bits was true...bet you can't guess which bit!.

I've gone to make tea and bagels...if I miss anything apologies you'll just have to fill in the blanks...

Ok I am back and it turns out i've missed a fair bit so your going to have to go read some other spoilers to know whats just happened!! Nah I'm just having you on...it turns out I took my break just as adverts came on...that was lucky hey! So I missed couple of food adverts, film advert and perhaps something to do with computers..that could be a new game for the board...guess the ad's during Monday Night Raw...

RAW is back on and I for one can not wait.. so Brock video again which is good because I had almost forgot he was in a feud with HHH, the WWE are so clever at times!

So after that video it's time for another WRASSSTLING match! And it is a 6 man tag team elimination match...according to my sources Taggy Long actually had nothing to do with putting this together...I'm not sure I believe it mind.

Its Team Hell No & Team Cena (Thats Cena, power up T shirt & Wrist Bands in case you didn't know) vs The Shield! This should be a good one...well it will have to be to keep up with the high caliber show so far! Can they put on a better tag match than the Funkadactals & PTP..doubtful but lets watch and see!.

Team Hell No and Cena getting the better of the opening stages as Kane, then Bryan followed by Cena take it turns to keep Rollins in ring...and that is it Cena has pinned Rollins after the 5 moves of DOOM! Huge win for Cena and his Cenation...AHAHAHA I HAD YOU ALL...its not over just an advert. Come on REALLY!? You actually thought WWE would allow Cena to bury a group that quickly...you people are Stupid. Ok you may have a point with regards to CORRE...but apart from that...ok ok and NEXUS...but apart from those two it would never happen not in a million years.

Ok I will not ruin this one for you...no in depth report like the other ones! Trust me they are pretty in depth...just go watch it. Another decent match although no promises it's better than Funkadactals one but still good!

There was some excellent small segments in the opening 5 minutes...we had Kane go a little loopy and end up taking out all three shield members before being DQ'd so it becomes 3 vs 2 ...

Some time later we had a cool looking Superman punch from Reigns...Anderson Silva would have been proud...then Cena decided to carry a member of the Shield on his back over to the corner for the hot tag to D Bryan..that's right folks Cena carried a man on his back despite his very bad achilles and who said the guy never sells!! If only the Greek Achilles had that kind of will power then he'd still be alive today...shot in the ankle with a bow and died! What a whimp!

So whilst typing that it appears Bryan has been eliminated and its now 3 vs 1...but its Cena so its more like 3 vs 5 ...he takes out all three members then hits 5 moves...before he can hit AA Ambrose and Reigns come in..but he clears them again and then hits AA...Rollins is eliminated...then Reigns hits spear but he shouldn't have so is DQ'ed...its down to Ambrose v Cena. Cena can't do it surely...he cant overcome the odds....its the STF the STF...UNBELIEVABLE! Cena was on his own and got rid of two of them...locked in STF and was about to win! But then Shield got back into the ring to put a stop to it! They lay him out with a powerbomb!

Well who would have seen that coming...Cena so close to upsetting the odds but just misses out...don't worry though because he still looks very very strong in defeat. Oh dear as if he hasn't suffered enough Ryback is coming down to feast on his remains..did you see the link then..feast and feed!...it appears he has a conscience as he then decides to leave..but wait he was tricking us..instead he decides to grab a chair and smashes Cena on the ankle. Well I think it was the ankle but Cena was holding his knee/ankle so I can't be too sure. Things aren't looking good for Cena now are they. That injured achilles attacked again and once more Cena is left in the ring being attended too..I'm getting a sense of deja vu here, I am sure he has been like that for the past two weeks but seemed to be in good health 7 days later each time..but I think that really is the oen to finish it off and actually injure it! No trust it really really is!

Ok now that is all done I think its time for another Brock v Lesnar recap...well if I was production I would just in case people have forgot in all that commotion that they are facing off for the first time since Wrestlemania TONIGHT! They listened to me...they actually recapped the feud! Get in their...I really should of made a bet on that one! In the words of Ron Simmons 'DAMN'!

Backstage and Ryback is letting us know that Ryback Rules as both ourselves and Cena will realise...quick recap of the Swagger going berserk segment from last week...now this was pretty cool so don't mind watching it again!!

Takes us nicely into the Langston vs Del Rio/Swagger match...we had the chance to vote so who did we choose...I voted 29,763 times..all for Del Rio so if he doesn't get picked I am TOUTING in next week!! And the Winner is SWAGGER...NO WAY! Right that's it WWE you are getting TOUTED!!

So it will be battle of the skinniest shoulder straps and after some rolling around on the ropes Swagger just starts to get the upper hand...before an advert stops all the action..I think they are taking a break to adjust those outfits I heard a camera man shout 'not enough pecs on show boys not enough pecs' just before we suddenly went to commercial..we are back on RAW and Langston now has the upper hand..

Quick update...the shoulder straps have moved and more pecs are now on show. I told you!! Also Cole has annouced the groundbreaking news that fans have recorded a new record for the most votes cast on the WWE App...who said our votes don't count hey hey!! What's that...mine didn't because they were for Del Rio...Good Point but I helped set a NEW RECORD so all worth it!
Big E has just suplexed Swagger off the top rope and immediately the camera shows a pretty x rated angle which sees what can only be described as a wedgie..that looks nasty and may actually make him tap out...if it doesn't the patriot lock which Swagger suddenly locks in will.

Nope that doesn't either and after getting to the ropes Big E now regains control and takes it outside. The straps by the way are now down...and so much pecks are on show that even JBL who is a real man's man has to admit 'woowww this is impressive', As he says it Big E goes to run Swagger into the barricade but is distracted as he gazes across at JBL and he misses and is then counted out. Damn compliment from JBL!!

All hell breaks lose afterwards as Del Rio comes to the ring...tries to take advantage and get the better of Swagger...fails...is put in the Patriot lock...but rescued by Ricardo through a bin shot to Swagger (Whatever happened to placing it over the head, surely much better)...anyway Big E is back in doesn't last long though...enzuiguri by Del Rio and he's out again...then Swagger tries to take advantage but is clotheslined over the rope and Del Rio reigns for tonight!! Well that was exciting and fresh...good to see some new ideas being utilised to help build the feud right?!

Well with 45 mins left we head to a break and I have to say that I am pretty certain we will be seeing Brock V HHH in the ring together soon...unless this is the biggest swerve by WWE in years and it turns out neither are actually at WWE RAW tonight...Maybe a diva match first though right?! We haven't had one of those tonight...or in fact seen Kaitlyn receive anymore presents from her not so mystery admirer.

I am 2 for 2 guys...back from the break and we have a DIVA match! What did I tell you...that time I made a bet...it was with myself but the important thing is I won..

Time for some real in depth commentary as would only be fitting for a diva match. Unbelievable....Kaitlyn has a present...its from her admirer..I am sooo good at this guessing business! Give me a medal...no really someone give me a medal!

Erm ok that wasn't as good as a normal diva match...bit of slapping...gut kicking...AJ pretending to be knocked out only to wrap Natalya into a submission as she was going for a finisher (that was actually pretty impressive from AJ, if only WWE actually gave them a chance to shine people like her would bring some credibility back).

Right i've been right last two times and given we have our 298th Brock recap tonight I think we could be heading to the Brock/HHH face off next..

NOOOOOO! Why Oh Why...I was on a roll...turns out Brock/HHH isn't next as Jerciho is backstage waiting to talk!

Jericho told us he is done playing games and pandering to everyone else..at Sunday he gets serious. Something like that anyway....point is...I don't think there is one actually, Chris you will continue to do as your told and be involved in stupid storylines while putting everyone else over do you understand!!

HHH music hits....makes his way down...advert....comes back...music still playing...

HHH tells us all about all the history with Brock and yet nothing is settled. Talks about ring being his home...he has learnt to hate and thrive in the ring. Never felt more at home than when it is surrounded by steel which rips flesh and can break bones..(well it hasn't for about 5 years but still...it's dangerous I think is what he is trying to say)..

Then he tells Brock to come take his home...Brock obliges and comes out with a lawyer..could be Heyman, the suit gives him that cheap lawyer look. I think he was about to say HHH hasn't been making payments on the house Brock rented him therefore he is taking it back off him but Triple H cut him off... Hmm that was a bit of strange ending to the feud!....

Actually hold on Heyman is now talking, turns out that isn't happening...instead they will meet at Extreme Rules where Brock will teach The Game'uh all about hate. Brock is a cage fighting animal and The Game Uh is the biggest slab of meat...WWE missed a chance then, Ryback definitely should of come out screaming feed me more. Some more talking from Heyman who says that HHH will be a loser come Sunday night. Brock is ready for a fight but after tearing up the office last week is a little tired so we will wait till Sunday to see it. They go to leave but HHH cuts the music and asks himself why Brock wont face him 'like a man'...turns out it is nothing to do with Brock but its Heyman's fault as he can't afford him to fight just in case he gets his ass kicked again which isn't good for a business man. Better yet if Brock loses at Sunday then Heyman's meal ticket goes. A lot of food references tonight yet a lack of fast food joint plugs...this was definitely the week for Cole and King to do Dominos on the IPAD! STUPID CREATIVE!

Now HHH is talking to Brock and asking him to prove he is a beast and come down or will he stay at the top and prove he is Brock the Bitch! That gets to him...honestly that word gets to everyone. He makes his way down...refs get in the way! I am telling them they better move...i've been waiting for something to happen all night! Now move god damn it..Cage door is open and Brock is starting to enter..will he wont he...will he wont he....he is in! and we are underway they are going at it! Finally! Brock gets upper hand..then Triple H...then Brock with huge belly to Belly suplex..goes to run into Triple H who moves and throws him into steel cage head first...strangely enough it neither tore his flesh or broke any bones..and you were saying Mr CEO!!?..now punches him a few times before throwing him out of the cage door and then standing on the ropes calling him back in! Brock not happy but that's it for the night...he doesn't want anything else to do with him. Makes his way up the ramp with Heyman! And thats it folks...the go home show doesn't disappoint and I am now buzzing for Extreme Rules!! No really I am....I am god damn it why won't people believe me!

If that doesn't make you want to part with £14.95 then I don't know what will...obviously decent storylines...progression...wrestling and build up...but we can't get that so just be happy with what you got and buy the damn PPV ok!?

hang on, before i go any further, did i read right? one of the shield was dq'd for spearing cena because he wasnt the legal man, but then the last guy in, ambrose was it?, wasnt dq'd after 'outside interference' from the remaining members of the shield???

sounds horrendous. with less than 45 minutes of wrestling??

Ziggler might not have been at the show, but he was tweeting throughout. Started with this;

no ziggs at #RAW ouch @WWE swags/del rio will surely entertain JK JK at least cenas there doing fresh material, i bet

ended with this:

well, that was fun...for YOU oh & if @VinceMcMahon asks MY TWITTER ACCOUNT WAS HACKED!!!! oh no!!! #LaterMarks

https://twitter.com/HEELZiggler/
Wonder how long it'll all stay up...

I was looking forward to Jericho dancing, that's disappointing!

What an awful show.

People shouldn't buy Extreme Rules off the back of that show, it was terrible. But the card is fairly strong. The removal of Ziggler because of his injury significantly alters the quality and interest in the Del Rio/Swagger match.

Awful Raw, interupting my enjoyment of adverts.

"Nope that doesn't either and after getting to the ropes Big E now regains control and takes it outside. The straps by the way are now down...and so much pecks are on show that even JBL who is a real man's man has to admit 'woowww this is impressive', As he says it Big E goes to run Swagger into the barricade but is distracted as he gazes across at JBL and he misses and is then counted out. Damn compliment from JBL!!"

Was this really chris.wilkerson13 in disguise as JBL?? He Big E
Was Big E strong and fast?

Big E is always strong and fast. I haven't even seen Raw, but I know that he was strong and fast.

The worst RAW I have seen in a very long time. Usually Sky+ and fast forward through it, cutting it down to 1 hour viewing but this morning I must have gone through everything in 20 minutes maximum. The only thing that really interested me was Hell no and Cena vs The Shield and as usual the scumbag made his opponents look week and failed to lose cleanly (in fact he ended their winning streak via DQ). I don't care if it sounds distasteful, I wish the man an injury that will keep him off my screen for a very long time.

Was an horrific Raw. For a go home show, it was a disaster.

The only thing that is a positive to take is the ending. I thought it was good and sold the match for Lesnar vs HHH quite well. I do hope this is the ending of there rivalry though.

All matches were pretty standard and non entertaining. Ill probably get Extreme Rules on Sunday, as i do think the card is strong enough. Although bit gutted Dolph won't be there, was looking forward to that match the most!

I was going to go to bed after the opening segment of RAW...but I had bought some junk food in and was off work today so decided to stay up. I was just going to write a little bit about the opening 20 minutes being the worst I can remember possibly ever..but then I continued writing it and decided to take the comedic approach of reviewing the show.

It incredibly made it a little more enjoyable!

The whole Cena stuff was just awful and it should be used as the example to show everything that is wrong with the product at the moment. I, like Cenanuff,actually find myself willing an injury to Cena, not massively serious just something to keep him off screen, because the guy is simply devoid of talent.

I have said he can have his good moments and is a little better than people give him credit for when it comes to wrestling but I am done with it. The guy cannot even do the simple task of selling injuries....all show and all build up the talk is 'oh can he get by with his achilles injury'...then he carries someone on his back across the ring without even so much as looking hurt...and then at the end of the match he is running around like a lunatic clotheslining people over the rope...5 knuckle shuffling and AA'ing his way to single handily beating the hottest group in the WWE at the moment!! To top it all he then gets hit by a chair....holds his knee and ankle (NO JOHN ITS THE ANKLE WHICH IS SUPPOSED TO BE INJURED..BLOODY IDIOT)...and it ends with him in the ring being attended to. SORRY but are we supposed to believe that he is injured now...because I am sure the last two weeks have ended like that and Cena has recovered just perfectly so far!

What really grates me with Cena is that whilst I understand that he has an affiliation with the kids and charity is important to him etc...his job is to be a wrestler/entertainer. Now 2 years ago when it was 70/30 mix in terms of reception,all well and good to stick to your beliefs. That is no longer the case...the vast majority of people are fed up and bored of you. DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!! He may be lumped with this gimmick and the writers may be giving him these cheesy promos etc but he can easily say 'hey i don't like this and this, im changing it'. If anyone holds the cards to do that then it is him.

The Rock, Triple H, Stone Cold, Kurt Angle ....people often talk of greats like this and point to there promo's or intensity or wrestling ....but for me the biggest with the wrestlers of that era is they had the foresight and vision to change there characters when the crowd were getting fed up with them or it was running out of steam. I have read in many books and articles that these 4 had huge says in where there characters headed in terms of direction etc. For that they deserve massive props....it is something which Cena should take on board!

I am now officially joining the Cena hate club...no longer will I give him a little credit or stick up for him slightly...he is officially a buffoon and without doubt took overachievement for an utterly useless wrestler to a brand new level!

MetalMotty wrote:"Nope that doesn't either and after getting to the ropes Big E now regains control and takes it outside. The straps by the way are now down...and so much pecks are on show that even JBL who is a real man's man has to admit 'woowww this is impressive', As he says it Big E goes to run Swagger into the barricade but is distracted as he gazes across at JBL and he misses and is then counted out. Damn compliment from JBL!!"

Was this really chris.wilkerson13 in disguise as JBL?? He Big E
Was Big E strong and fast?

Im gonna motorboat him.

It wasnt horrendous. But it wasnt much better. Couple good matches. They are lucky the ER card is good cos the build has been lazy.

don't forget this is all available on the wwe app. it goes to show how backwards the marketing team is that they spend all night plugging an app that only a few thousand people have as opposed to plugging the ppv which hundreds of thousands of people will order

So does that mean the Shield's streak is over? Really...by DQ!?

xviperx wrote:So does that mean the Shield's streak is over? Really...by DQ!?

yup. wwe didn't think that 1 through but then again they never do

deleted Raw from my sky planner last week, obviously haven't missed much

Do the WWE hate wrestling!? They spend a year building the Shield's streak just to let Super Cena dookie all over it.

I don't think the DQ counts really as they still haven't lost properly. I am obviously in the minority but I thought there was some good stuff on RAW - I enjoyed CJ / Fandango and The Shield and HHH / Brock was great. I could have done without some of the other stuff but I wouldn't say it was terrible.

No I liked Raw too. The opening segment really got Fandango over as a heel and the crowd gave him good heat. It seems Summer Rae may start to get a bit more involved now as well.

I think I know why they had The Shield lose (albeit by DQ). Over the last few weeks, when the commentators were talking about The Shield being unbeaten they kept asking "How will they respond to their first loss? Will it be the end of them?" and making quite a point of it. So they finally lose the Raw before Extreme Rules but then go on to win the Tag Team and United States titles so then Cole and co can talk about "thats the way The Shield respond". They only lost by DQ (except for Rollins) and by the next Raw, they will all have gold around their waist so they remain the dominant force.

If that happens then it works but if not then it's a waste of build up.

Agreed, at Extreme Rules they all need to win gold or none at all otherwise its pointless

xviperx wrote:Do the WWE hate wrestling!? They spend a year building the Shield's streak just to let Super Cena dookie all over it.

They managed to have Cesaro say ''I put the W in WWE'' without any of the commentators say what the W stood for

psycho-gooner wrote:

xviperx wrote:Do the WWE hate wrestling!? They spend a year building the Shield's streak just to let Super Cena dookie all over it.

They managed to have Cesaro say ''I put the W in WWE'' without any of the commentators say what the W stood for

Officially the none of the W's stand for anything anymore, World Wrestling Entertainment changed its name to just WWE a three or four years agao