Press Conference - the 23rd Variety

1. Do you know what is going on at the moment?

In life in general or on the league? In life, not really. I just let it carry on around me, and I smile like I know whats happening. In the league? See the last answer

2. How did you get on in your last game? 

I think I won, but not sure tbh *smiles like I know what's happening*

3. Was your opponent generally better than you, or just lucky?

Seriously, if it is the game I remember which was Azzy, then it could have gone either way. Winning didn't flatter us, we defended well and took our two goals well.

4. Would you rather win the EPL, FA Cup, or Champions League?

Champions League is the pinnacle of football to me, and I reckon the one most players would want to win. EPL would be great and you have to be strong over the course of a whole season to win, so is probably the hardest. FA Cup has lost its prestige for me. Cup Final Day used to be a whole day blocked out with all the build up and then the game, normally with our own sunday league team end of season celebration. Now if I miss it, I don't really care. Having said that, it is the one of those three competitions that Everton could realistically win in the next 5-10 years.

5. Are you looking forward to the UEFA Nations League Finals?

I'm not sure. When the Nations League started, I was like most that I couldn't get enthusiastic, but then enjoyed it when it was actually on. That euphoria has dropped away given the time since the groups, so it could either pass me by or I will be really into it again. Probably depend on how England perform tbh.

6. What piece of technology brings you the most joy?

The internet. It has changed the world and made the world a much smaller place. And has the made the pretend manager game a much more social game, rather than just sitting at a PC playing Championship Manager for hours by yourself.

I did used to play a football manager game by mail (cleverly called Play by mail) back in the 90s. Anyone else remember that?

7. Should there be a bank holiday every month?

Yes. Next question.

8. Is Snooker actually a sport?

Yes, I believe so. I googled it and it says it is. I think its probably just an old school past time. I mean, blokes were plonking their bright red balls on tables every Saturday night back in the day

1. Do you know what is going on at the moment?
Nope, in the league or in life

2. How did you get on in your last game?
P-P

3. Was your opponent generally better than you, or just lucky?
Was usually a bit of both when I played

4. Would you rather win the EPL, FA Cup, or Champions League?
Premier League, although none are within reach of Crawley Town anytime soon, the FA Cup is closest.

5. Are you looking forward to the UEFA Nations League Finals?
I am, although that could fade out as soon as England lose their semi final on penalties and people cease to care again, before Southgate compounds it further by resigning to take the Brighton job.

(Fun fact, I've been told Southgate is taking the Brighton job, John Yems comes in at work and reckons Dan Ashworth has convinced him to do it)

6. What piece of technology brings you the most joy?
My phone. Has to be. I mean, the internet as a whole, but primarily a smartphone which has everything you need at the touch of a button/screen

7. Should there be a bank holiday every month?
Yes, although I'd get rid of some occasions with two bank holidays to make it work. I'd swap the extra Bank Holidays in May and at Easter for days in June and July.

8. Is Snooker actually a sport?
It is, but it requires minimal athletic prowess, which lessens the sporty side of it somewhat.

1. Do you know what is going on at the moment?
Theresa May is being verbally bukkaked by her own MPs, and Donald Trump hasn't done anything mental for a few weeks. I think armageddon is nigh.

2. How did you get on in your last game?
I think our last game was a loss to Grimsby, so

3. Was your opponent generally better than you, or just lucky?
Better than all of us combined. Which would make for a really cool Hardcore Cup game.

4. Would you rather win the EPL, FA Cup, or Champions League?
FA Cup. Nothing better than walking up those hallowed steps and being awarded the trophy by a member of the royal family. Champions League is pish and the league can only be won by rich teams.

5. Are you looking forward to the UEFA Nations League Finals?
I don't know what they are, is this the breakaway league? If so, I hope they do break away, good riddance to the lot of them.

6. What piece of technology brings you the most joy?
If we're ignoring items that vibrate, I'd have to say the humble washing machine. Actually, that vibrates too. I'll say kettle.

7. Should there be a bank holiday every month?
I think bankers have taken enough liberties - we should cancel all bank holidays and institute 'bank reparations days' whereby fat cat bankers have to work a full weekend every few months to make amends for single-handedly ruining Western economies for a full decade.

8. Is Snooker actually a sport?
Speaking as someone who can claim to have made a century break, yes, yes it is.

1. Do you know what is going on at the moment?
I haven't been on the fb chat for a while so I don't know if somethings happened to hero. But hopefully he's ok and back on whenever he's free.

2. How did you get on in your last game?
I think I Iost to afro. I don't mind that as I WON THE BET

3. Was your opponent generally better than you, or just lucky?
I didn't watch it tbh.

4. Would you rather win the EPL, FA Cup, or Champions League?
If your a Pool fan then defo the EPL. City want to win the CL. But seeing as Real aren't in the EPL an FA Cup I guess I'll just settle for the CL.

5. Are you looking forward to the UEFA Nations League Finals?
Meh England are just gonna bottle it again so it'd be fun watching the fallout when that happens.

6. What piece of technology brings you the most joy?
The most important thing in today's society would defo be the internet. Without it there would be less joy in the world.

7. Should there be a bank holiday every month?
As Sun Tzu once famously said "If the great war has already started and both sides agree to a temporary 24 hour ceasefire, then it can happen. But not every month. That would give time for the enemy to bring in reinforcements and they could get the upper hand in the war. In war you must be ruthless sometimes when the enemy wants a ceasefire"

8. Is Snooker actually a sport?
It's more of a sport than darts.

1. Do you know what is going on at the moment?
You’re not buying the players from me I wanted you to buy
2. How did you get on in your last game? 
I don’t know any more
3. Was your opponent generally better than you, or just lucky?
Anyone who beats me is lucky to be alive
4. Would you rather win the EPL, FA Cup, or Champions League?
League, innit.
5. Are you looking forward to the UEFA Nations League Finals?
Yes, thanks, you?
6. What piece of technology brings you the most joy?
My phone.
7. Should there be a bank holiday every month?
2.
8. Is Snooker actually a sport?
Yeah, it’s not exactly fishing or F1.

1. I’m stuck in a Poopie fatboy slim remix, work sleep eat repeat
2. I lost to TAB and the diamond formation, seems to be a winner that
3. They deserved to win, but shouldve only been a one goal margin
4. Champions League, Rangers would have to do all sorts of well to win competitions they’re not even able to qualify for. 
5. I don’t even know what that look like, but any summer football is a bonus
6. Tv and also headphones, just so I don’t have to listen to other people’s Poopie music. Others I could go without.
7. No.
8. I’d say it’s a game not a sport. Skill thing but there’s no athleticism needed

1. I don't, unfortunately. I think our only option is to scrap all the games played so far and restart the league as a traditional tactics based league. We could have a referendum to decide whether we do this using the current squads, or use new squads. I can almost hear the anti-democracy protesters from here....


2. Last game we had was against Carlisle, and yes, I thought we played well and deserved the win. After a dip earlier on in the season, our recent form has been brilliant and I can see us getting a minimum of second in the league.


3. Fluxy might disagree, as is his right. But I thought we weren't lucky at all, and that we deserved the victory.


4. The FA Cup isn't even an option for me - it's a tough one between the Champions League and Premier League. A few years ago I'd have said the Champions League, no question. But now I'm slightly inclined to say the Premier League because of the competitiveness of it. To win it now with some of the teams in the mix is having an extraordinary season. I love the Champions League, and the drama that comes with it - especially the last couple of years. But I don't have BT Sport. So I'm saying the Premier League, but ask me on a day where I'm less grumpy about BT and I might change my mind.


5. Yes, I think it'll be a really good tournament. The fans will get behind it and the pubs will be full. They deserve credit for this system. If I remember rightly there was an Apprentice task asking for something similar. And one of the teams submitted an idea of splitting up the European sides into separate leagues. So either one of you lot works for UEFA, or someone there reads this forum and stole our idea.


6. I thought about saying the internet, but it's not pure joy at times. Probably games consoles. Playing so many incredible games throughout my life - be it Sonic, Mario, Final Fantasy, FIFA, Uncharted, GTA - there's so many I could go on and name. If it's a particular technology, games console, then probably the Nintendo 64. Two games: Super Mario 64 and Goldeneye were so groundbreaking and paved the way for so many games we see nowadays.


7. No, it would be crippling to the economy. Also, my company is open as normal on a bank holiday. Most retail, pubs and restaurant businesses are open, and are even busier if anything, on bank holidays. I'd also argue that similar to Sunday trading hours, things like bank holidays don't have the same importance that they used to. More people work on those days anyway.

It's easy to say yes more holiday, but the reality is that it's a poorly thought out idea.


8. Yes, of course it is. Things don't have to be physical to be a sport - I would consider things like Chess and Scrabble sports as well, given that there is an annual World Championship in both.

1. Do you know what is going on at the moment?
I know that the game of thrones finale was a damp squib

2. How did you get on in your last game?
Seems a while ago but I believe it was a win

3. Was your opponent generally better than you, or just lucky?
Given the recent changes to the squad I'd say they probably had the stronger side but we'll take the 3 points

4. Would you rather win the EPL, FA Cup, or Champions League?
In general I would say the Champions League is the pinnacle, however given the choice it would undoubtedly be the League for obvious reasons

5. Are you looking forward to the UEFA Nations League Finals?
No idea when it is but I'll watch it if its on, football in the summer is a bonus

6. What piece of technology brings you the most joy?
My phone

7. Should there be a bank holiday every month?
Oh for sure

8. Is Snooker actually a sport?
No, I'd put it in the same category as darts, chess, scrabble and cluedo

If it even slightly becomes the old tactics league, I’m burning this section of the forum down

Renege wrote:8. I’d say it’s a game not a sport. Skill thing but there’s no athleticism needed

Hate to break it to you, but playing four hours of snooker is far more knackering than playing 90mins of football. The concentration, up and down, stretching over the table, it all builds up. I used to sleep for days after a big tournament.

Sounds like you're playing football wrong

Azzy wrote:

Renege wrote:8. I’d say it’s a game not a sport. Skill thing but there’s no athleticism needed

Hate to break it to you

I wish you'd intended on this joke

Dolphin Ziggler wrote:If it even slightly becomes the old tactics league, I’m burning this section of the forum down

Yeah I would be out too....there is no appetite for it as shown by new tactics leagues not getting any players while the fifa league was going on

Azzy wrote:

Renege wrote:8. I’d say it’s a game not a sport. Skill thing but there’s no athleticism needed

Hate to break it to you, but playing four hours of snooker is far more knackering than playing 90mins of football. The concentration, up and down, stretching over the table, it all builds up. I used to sleep for days after a big tournament.

I think it is more knackering for the spectators

When you're playing football, the adrenaline kicks in and gets you through at least 75mins of the game. No such luck in snooker, where adrenaline is your enemy and you have to suppress every urge to get excited. Adrenaline makes you miss shots you'd normally pot, and so for four hours you're either standing up all the time, or up and down like a yo-yo, leaning across tables, tickling the pink, sinking the brown and generally ruining your psychological make-up by second-guessing your every shot.

Which is why working an office job is a sport too. That’s 9-5 and