The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
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Sir. badgerhands
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The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
Okay it's been a walking on egg shells at times on the boxing boards this week, but we've somehow got to the end of the week without having to ban anyone!
That in itself warrants a
Now hopefully to end the week on a good note, for different parties to end up walking off into the Friday sunset holding hands and laughing over Pacquaio/Mayweather anecdotes from yesteryear I want you all to put forward the moments when boxing has seen the funny side itself.
From botches to bloopers.
From quotes to putdowns.
What over the years has raised a chuckle for you?
Here's a few to start:
And some vids:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJHlsYgYKP8&feature=related
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouZPYpIR2j4 Please excuse the music!
So what do you guys have?
That in itself warrants a
Now hopefully to end the week on a good note, for different parties to end up walking off into the Friday sunset holding hands and laughing over Pacquaio/Mayweather anecdotes from yesteryear I want you all to put forward the moments when boxing has seen the funny side itself.
From botches to bloopers.
From quotes to putdowns.
What over the years has raised a chuckle for you?
Here's a few to start:
Frank Bruno on his win against Oliver McCall
"I was in a no-win situation, so I'm glad that I won rather than lost. "
Don King, on boxing's rating system"When we started, it was based on lies. It's changing now. There are no secrets in the business. You've got to come with the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. It's becoming very confusing."
Marlon Starling"I'll fight Lloyd Honeyghan for nothing if the price is right"
Muhammad Ali"Joe Frazier is so ugly, he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wildlife."
And some vids:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJHlsYgYKP8&feature=related
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouZPYpIR2j4 Please excuse the music!
So what do you guys have?
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
Gerry Cooney can't fight to keep warm.
Irving Rudd
Hector Camacho's great-dream is to die in his own arms.
Irving Rudd
Herol Graham has turned defensive boxing into a poetic art. Trouble is, nobody ever got knocked out by a poem.
Eddie Shaw
I was once knocked out by a Mexican bantamweight - six of my pals were swinging him around by his heels at the time.
Randall Tex' Cobb
I'd love to fight Gerry Cooney. But I have my price - 25 cents and a loose woman.
Randall Tex'Cobb
If a boxer ever went as crazy as Nijinsky all the wowsers in the world would be screaming 'punch drunk!' Well, who hit Nijinsky? And why isn't there a campaign against ballet? It gives girls thick legs.
A. J. Liebling - The Sweet Science
Me and Jake LaMotta grew up in the same neighbourhood. You wanna know how popular Jake was? When we played hide and seek, nobody ever looked for LaMotta.
Rocky Graziano
My girlfriend boos when we make love because she knows it turns me on.
Hector Camacho
My God, kids today think that the laces are for tying up the gloves.
Fritzie Zivic
On being asked, by a female reporter, if he watched his opponent's eyes or gloves- His gloves, dear. I've never been hit by an eye in my life.
Terry Dowries
On choosing a referee for his fight against Floyd Patterson - It don't matter as long as he can count up to ten.
Sonny Liston
On her husband Ron's defeat by Joe Frazier- I'm a realist. You don't enter a Volkswagen at Indy unless you know a helluva shortcut.
Dariene Stander
On Joe Frazier's attempt to sing The Star Spangled Banner in tune- I've made the national anthem a six-point underdog.
Jimmy The Greek' Snyder
Some more from Tex Cobb :
“It’s one thing to call me white and slow. But to call me a fat, cowardly, cocaine-snorting, fight fixing cheat? Who are they calling fat?”
“I only had two fights as an amateur and lost both of them. Heck, I figure I didn’t have much of a future there. So I turned pro.”
“Hollywood’s a great place to vacation, but I wouldn’t want to live there. The people don’t have a concept of reality. Their reality is how good they pretend. "
“I love acting. It’s easy for me. All you do is look in the camera, smile, and lie with charm. I learned how to do that watching Don King promote fights.”
“Don King is one of the great humanitarians of our time. He has risen above that great term prejudice. He has screwed everybody he has ever been around. Hog, dog or frog, it don’t matter to Don. If you got a quarter, he wants the first twenty-six cents.”
“Don King is like everybody else in boxing. He’s a liar, a thief, a murderer and a racketeer. And a con man. But there ain’t anybody as bad as Bob Arum. That New York City Jew lawyer will make you hate city folks, Jews, and lawyers in the same day.”
“I find it a drag being sensitive twelve hours a day. I’ve got thirty minutes of sensitivity in me in the morning, thirty minutes in the evening and that’s it. I’m more at home kicking butt.”
“All I want to do is hit somebody in the mouth. It’s a whole lot easier than working for a living.”
“People always ask if success is going to change me, and I tell them I sure hope so.”
“I figure I’ve been hit in the head with everything ‘cept a ‘54 Pontiac.”
When asked before the fight if he was afraid of Larry Holmes, Tex replied, “What the hell is this guy going to do to me? Hit me? You think I got all this scar tissue running into parked cars?”
Tex explained away the loss to Holmes. " When I got up I stuck to my plan - stumbling forward and getting hit in the face.”
Cobb was delighted that the brutality of the Holmes fight had driven Howard Cosell from the fight game for good. Cobb said it was “My gift to boxing.”
Irving Rudd
Hector Camacho's great-dream is to die in his own arms.
Irving Rudd
Herol Graham has turned defensive boxing into a poetic art. Trouble is, nobody ever got knocked out by a poem.
Eddie Shaw
I was once knocked out by a Mexican bantamweight - six of my pals were swinging him around by his heels at the time.
Randall Tex' Cobb
I'd love to fight Gerry Cooney. But I have my price - 25 cents and a loose woman.
Randall Tex'Cobb
If a boxer ever went as crazy as Nijinsky all the wowsers in the world would be screaming 'punch drunk!' Well, who hit Nijinsky? And why isn't there a campaign against ballet? It gives girls thick legs.
A. J. Liebling - The Sweet Science
Me and Jake LaMotta grew up in the same neighbourhood. You wanna know how popular Jake was? When we played hide and seek, nobody ever looked for LaMotta.
Rocky Graziano
My girlfriend boos when we make love because she knows it turns me on.
Hector Camacho
My God, kids today think that the laces are for tying up the gloves.
Fritzie Zivic
On being asked, by a female reporter, if he watched his opponent's eyes or gloves- His gloves, dear. I've never been hit by an eye in my life.
Terry Dowries
On choosing a referee for his fight against Floyd Patterson - It don't matter as long as he can count up to ten.
Sonny Liston
On her husband Ron's defeat by Joe Frazier- I'm a realist. You don't enter a Volkswagen at Indy unless you know a helluva shortcut.
Dariene Stander
On Joe Frazier's attempt to sing The Star Spangled Banner in tune- I've made the national anthem a six-point underdog.
Jimmy The Greek' Snyder
Some more from Tex Cobb :
“It’s one thing to call me white and slow. But to call me a fat, cowardly, cocaine-snorting, fight fixing cheat? Who are they calling fat?”
“I only had two fights as an amateur and lost both of them. Heck, I figure I didn’t have much of a future there. So I turned pro.”
“Hollywood’s a great place to vacation, but I wouldn’t want to live there. The people don’t have a concept of reality. Their reality is how good they pretend. "
“I love acting. It’s easy for me. All you do is look in the camera, smile, and lie with charm. I learned how to do that watching Don King promote fights.”
“Don King is one of the great humanitarians of our time. He has risen above that great term prejudice. He has screwed everybody he has ever been around. Hog, dog or frog, it don’t matter to Don. If you got a quarter, he wants the first twenty-six cents.”
“Don King is like everybody else in boxing. He’s a liar, a thief, a murderer and a racketeer. And a con man. But there ain’t anybody as bad as Bob Arum. That New York City Jew lawyer will make you hate city folks, Jews, and lawyers in the same day.”
“I find it a drag being sensitive twelve hours a day. I’ve got thirty minutes of sensitivity in me in the morning, thirty minutes in the evening and that’s it. I’m more at home kicking butt.”
“All I want to do is hit somebody in the mouth. It’s a whole lot easier than working for a living.”
“People always ask if success is going to change me, and I tell them I sure hope so.”
“I figure I’ve been hit in the head with everything ‘cept a ‘54 Pontiac.”
When asked before the fight if he was afraid of Larry Holmes, Tex replied, “What the hell is this guy going to do to me? Hit me? You think I got all this scar tissue running into parked cars?”
Tex explained away the loss to Holmes. " When I got up I stuck to my plan - stumbling forward and getting hit in the face.”
Cobb was delighted that the brutality of the Holmes fight had driven Howard Cosell from the fight game for good. Cobb said it was “My gift to boxing.”
HumanWindmill- VIP
- Posts : 10945
Join date : 2011-02-18
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
but we've somehow got to the end of the week without having to ban anyone!
To paraphrase Jack Palance in "City Slickers"...'The week ain't over yet!'
Can't really top any of Windy's but I remember an interview with La Motta a few years ago when he recalled his youthful days as a bit of a villain.
"We were always intelligent and stole things in alphabetical order...like a bike, a car, a coat....."
To paraphrase Jack Palance in "City Slickers"...'The week ain't over yet!'
Can't really top any of Windy's but I remember an interview with La Motta a few years ago when he recalled his youthful days as a bit of a villain.
"We were always intelligent and stole things in alphabetical order...like a bike, a car, a coat....."
Guest- Guest
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
He's just copying David HayeHumanWindmill wrote:On choosing a referee for his fight against Floyd Patterson - It don't matter as long as he can count up to ten. Sonny Liston
Can someone post Robbie Peden knocking out Nate Campbell?
Scottrf- Posts : 14359
Join date : 2011-01-26
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
"Me and Jake LaMotta grew up in the same neighbourhood. You wanna know how popular Jake was? When we played hide and seek, nobody ever looked for LaMotta.
Rocky Graziano"
Like that one Windy!!
Have some Don King quotes chaps.
He worked for the day when all people would be clothed in dignity.
Don King
I'm a promoter of the people for the people and by the people and my magic lies in my people ties. I'm a promoter of America. I'm American people. You know what I mean? So therefore, uh, do not send for who the bell tolls 'cause the bell tolls for thee.
Don King
If a bullfrog had wings it wouldn't bump his behind every time he hopped.
Don King
If you cast your bread upon the water and you have faith, you'll get back cash. If you don't have faith, you'll get soggy bread.
Don King
It ain't about if he knocks a guy out. It's about how he knocks a guy out. It's the style, the improvisation.
Don King
Martin Luther King took us to the mountain top: I want to take us to the bank.
Don King
Mike Tyson has been given every penny he has coming.
Don King
You go for the quality of the performance, not the longevity of it.
Don King
Rocky Graziano"
Like that one Windy!!
Have some Don King quotes chaps.
He worked for the day when all people would be clothed in dignity.
Don King
I'm a promoter of the people for the people and by the people and my magic lies in my people ties. I'm a promoter of America. I'm American people. You know what I mean? So therefore, uh, do not send for who the bell tolls 'cause the bell tolls for thee.
Don King
If a bullfrog had wings it wouldn't bump his behind every time he hopped.
Don King
If you cast your bread upon the water and you have faith, you'll get back cash. If you don't have faith, you'll get soggy bread.
Don King
It ain't about if he knocks a guy out. It's about how he knocks a guy out. It's the style, the improvisation.
Don King
Martin Luther King took us to the mountain top: I want to take us to the bank.
Don King
Mike Tyson has been given every penny he has coming.
Don King
You go for the quality of the performance, not the longevity of it.
Don King
Sir. badgerhands- Posts : 665
Join date : 2011-02-15
Location : Omnipresent
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
Sir. badgerhands wrote:"Me and Jake LaMotta grew up in the same neighbourhood. You wanna know how popular Jake was? When we played hide and seek, nobody ever looked for LaMotta.
Rocky Graziano"
Like that one Windy!!
Funny guy was Graziano wasn't he, badger ?
This one of yours had me laughing :
" Martin Luther King took us to the mountain top: I want to take us to the bank. "
Don King
Funny AND true. Great stuff.
HumanWindmill- VIP
- Posts : 10945
Join date : 2011-02-18
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
Interviewer to Frank Bruno - Frank who is your biggest inspiration outside of boxing
Bruno - Erm probably Joe Louis
Bruno - Erm probably Joe Louis
Rowley- Admin
- Posts : 22053
Join date : 2011-02-17
Age : 51
Location : I'm just a symptom of the modern decay that's gnawing at the heart of this country.
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
"I don't mind the fight going out at three in the morning. Everyone in Glasgow fights at three in the morning anyway"
Jim Watt (from memory)
"I'm always into promoting a positive black image. Whenever Leon Spinks fights I always pray, 'Dear Lord, please don't let them interview Leon on TV."
Can't remember!
"Mr Cooper, have you looked in the mirror lately and seen the state of your nose?"
"Henry Cooper: Well, madam, have you looked in the mirror and seen the state of your nose? Boxing is my excuse. What's yours?"
Jim Watt (from memory)
"I'm always into promoting a positive black image. Whenever Leon Spinks fights I always pray, 'Dear Lord, please don't let them interview Leon on TV."
Can't remember!
"Mr Cooper, have you looked in the mirror lately and seen the state of your nose?"
"Henry Cooper: Well, madam, have you looked in the mirror and seen the state of your nose? Boxing is my excuse. What's yours?"
coxy0001- Posts : 4250
Join date : 2011-01-28
Location : Tory country
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
Scottrf wrote:He's just copying David HayeHumanWindmill wrote:On choosing a referee for his fight against Floyd Patterson - It don't matter as long as he can count up to ten. Sonny Liston
Can someone post Robbie Peden knocking out Nate Campbell?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5nPIeDqelI
D4thincarnation- Posts : 3398
Join date : 2011-02-02
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
I'll go in there knock him out then get into his car, drive to his house and make love to his wife..
Duran before he fought Pazienza.
Duran before he fought Pazienza.
TRUSSMAN66- Posts : 40690
Join date : 2011-02-02
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
Did you have a fight with Duran a few months ago TRUSS?
Scottrf- Posts : 14359
Join date : 2011-01-26
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
I rolled him like a drunk..
TRUSSMAN66- Posts : 40690
Join date : 2011-02-02
Re: The Friday Funnies - Botches and Bloopers
"I broke my back, my back is broken"
Tyson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rw47gXsDwjw
Eddie Murphy talking about Joe Louis
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWvDao-MpOk&feature=related
Tyson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rw47gXsDwjw
Eddie Murphy talking about Joe Louis
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qWvDao-MpOk&feature=related
bellchees- Posts : 1776
Join date : 2011-02-25
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