Have you ever abandoned the game?

In a recent blog on the golf digest website a letter sent be a reader was published which outlined his five reasons for giving up golf. This got me wondering if anyone on this site had ever quit the game or was thinking of doing so. The reasons for this I am sure will be an interesting and insightful read.

http://www.golfdigest.com/magazine/blogs/golf-editors/2012/01/reader-quits-golf-heres-why.html

His reasons are; not enough to practice and maintain his ultimate skill level, cost, modernisation, golf fans and finally capitulation. The final point being that he can hit the ball further at 51, than he could when in his prime and well practiced, due to uncurbed advancement of technology.

I agree that there are issues with almost all the points he raised as reasons for abandoning the great game but none of these problems would make me give up the game. Who knows, the guy might be back on the course next week, after all we have all professed after a rough round that the clubs are going on ebay.

I can certainly sympathise with a feeling of frustration caused be not being able to attain a standard of play you could once produce due to decreased time available for practice. For me however I have developed other interests within the game which keep me interested no matter what I score. For those not interested in the course or the surroundings I can easily see poor play and lack of a way to prevent this as a reason to stop the game.

Costs, and I will include your own time as one, can certainly become a major problem for anyone wishing to play the game. Spending four to five hours doing anything must count as an exceedingly high cost in most peoples busy life’s. This cost is compounded by slow play, much of which could be linked to the reader’s points about modernisation and capitulation.

I would be particularly interested to hear what peoples braking points are/were when it comes to how much income they are prepared to forgo in order to play the game?

So guys have you ever or are you thinking of binning the clubs, or know someone who has/is, and what has pushed you into giving up something that can provide so much joy?

Secondly, once you have laid the bats rest do you still watch the pro game or were all ties cut?

Gave up at 13 with an 18 handicap, picked it up again age 28 and got a 7 handicap as my first adult handicap and have been getting lower ever since. Wish I'd never have given up, but circumstances dictated.

I gave up initially due to juniors not being supported at the club, having no standing on the course, no place to wait in the clubhouse and generally made to feel unwelcome, not to mention finding other interests.

Never given up as such (been playing about 10 years), but I played for a couple of years, then spent the next five years travelling a lot and working all over Europe, so didn't play more than 2 rounds a year for that period. Then got a job back home and promptly broke my ankle playing football so missed another complete season. Then got in with a regular fourball and have averaged at least once a week since then.

Interesting article and well worth a read, though I cannot help but think the golfer in question comes across as a bit of a Victor Meldrew.

The reasoning behind his inability to play to a high level I can understand as something that would infuriate him, but the rest of the reasons sounds like he is simply using as an excuse.

With regards to your questions Mac. BEing a reent divorcee i'm lucky enough to have as much time as I want to play and answer to no-one in return. The only way time would be impacted is when I have my children down for the weekends, but then thats a pleasure and there of an age I can introduce them to the game.

With regards to Financial costs then as long as I enjoy the game or feel I need or have reason to make any purchase then I would say there is no financial cost I wouldn't consider even at £200 a green fee it's not something you would do every day of the week so as a treat now and again to play a top venue then I'd pay it.

While not at the same level I came pretty close to giving up a few years ago as my golf became so bad that I had no idea where the ball was going - long, short, high, low, left or right. Fortunately as a last throw of the dice I decided to have a lesson and the pro spotted the problem pretty quickly. While I did not suddenly get back to where I was I could see the light! Because up to that point I had just lost any enjoyment of playing. I had always had lessons but like most hadn't for a while and slipped into bad habits.

As for the cost, this is something that I have considered too. Our fees head upwards every year as our membership numbers decline. Someone painted a gloomy scenario where in 4 years we could be paying over £2k/year compared to £1100 now. I wouldn't be a member then. Since we broke through the £1000/yr mark I have seriously questioned whether to rejoin. I know that £900 was still a lot but I guess like the 99p marketing tool it didn't seem so bad. For now I will wear it but if it starts heading up above inflation I think I will stop. Ironically I now earn more but I will start to analyse whether I am getting value and I doubt that as I probably play 30 rounds per year I will be able to justify it.

Honestly can't imagine a situation other than bad health that would get me to stop playing as still love the game as much now as when I first started 35 odd years ago. I'm probably just getting to the age when I'm likely to start drifting up in handicap terms so will be interested how well I deal with that over the years.

My best mate (and regular club partner) did pretty much give the game up about 8/9 years ago though and not sure if he'll come back to it.
His lad was just starting to play regular football and he wanted to be involved (now coaches having done FA badges) and also got them both season tickets to our local football club (Pompey, then in Championship). Though a reasonably good golfer (11 when he stopped) he was always a bit fragile with both the big wood in his hands on the tee and the short stick on the green and was regularly frustrated when he finished a round. Once asked his son if he wanted to take the game up and got the reply that "it couldn't be much fun as you always come home so miserable"!
This coupled with the cost of season tickets and not finding time to play led him to drop his membership.

He now plays about 3 or 4 rounds a year and still capable of playing to around 13 so will also be interested what he does when his son flies the nest.

I nearly gave up a couple of years ago after 45 years of competitive golf.
I played between 1 and 5 handicap for 40 of those years.
My handicap rose to 14 mainly due to chipping yips and I was not enjoying the sport.
I decided to stop playing competitively and now play about 40 rounds a year for fun.
Really started enjoying the game again.

turnip,
There could be no better reason for any sacrifice than going to watch Portsmouth . . . .

I gave up playing any more than a handful of times a year when my first child was born, and I was travelling extensively for work. Lost my swing, such as it was, got the yips on anything longer than a 9-iron and only ever play for the company now, whether my mates or my son. No other reason to spend the money otherwise, haven't got the time, money or patience to relearn the golfswing.

Sadly.

As for the cost, this is something that I have considered too. Our fees head upwards every year as our membership numbers decline. Someone painted a gloomy scenario where in 4 years we could be paying over £2k/year compared to £1100 now. I wouldn't be a member then. Since we broke through the £1000/yr mark I have seriously questioned whether to rejoin. I know that £900 was still a lot but I guess like the 99p marketing tool it didn't seem so bad. For now I will wear it but if it starts heading up above inflation I think I will stop. Ironically I now earn more but I will start to analyse whether I am getting value and I doubt that as I probably play 30 rounds per year I will be able to justify it.

That is an interesting point and something that is currently impacting on many clubs. Less members means the need to increase fees to keep revenues the same. Which from a business perspective is fine short term but they fail to realise this then cause more members to leave which means less revenue long term.

I'm looking at joining a private club as an addition to keeping my local municple membership, but so many in my area want a joining fee which I simply refuse to pay, which then means they lose out on my subscription money long term.

Kwini

I may be sad, but it really fascinates me how easy it is to loose the golfing bug, in fact almost as easy as it seemed to pick it up. When you play regularly and love the game it seems almost impossible to imagine not picking up a club again. There is no greater joy for me, outside family/girlfriend etc, than a quick 9 holes late on a Scottish summers evening. The light and peace that comes with that atmosphere coupled with doing something I love is just such a pleasure. This is not some jingoistic ideal it is just that the sky in Scotland (like other northern countries) can produce some very unique light on those longer summer nights.

Not to probe your reasons for giving up the game too aggressively but I do find it odd that you seem to have such passion for the game yet you no longer get that from playing golf but watching it. I just wonder when you stopped watching something like this weeks event at pebble or the masters played over such courses without getting the massive urge to get out and hit a ball?

If is so much as glimpse a course while passing on a train or see golf balls in a shop window my mind instantly hops to thoughts of getting to the course as soon as possible.

Doon the Water wrote:My handicap rose to 14 mainly due to chipping yips and I was not enjoying the sport.

Interesting - I thought you were previously known as The Ubiquitous Chipper in a former life (sorry if I've confused you with someone else).

All these stories of putting yips, swing faults and now chipping yips are scaring me a bit. But I need to develop a half-decent game first before losing it!

I've played with someone who at the time swore blind that they were giving up the game following that round (with some emphasis on "swore"). It was late in the day, we might have been the last people left on the course. After missing the ball several times off the tee, my friend hurled the driver off to one side. Unfortunately, it got caught fairly high up in a thorny thicket, not easy to reach. Quite painful for both us when trying to retrieve the club after a moment to calm down. Have known the feeling myself, but hope it never becomes so strong that I give up the game. For one thing, a reason I took it up was to grab a headstart so that I'm at a decent level by the time I retire!

Doon

I have to say that I much prefer a casual game played for the sole purpose of having fun than playing in a medal comp. This does not mean I do not try and score as well as possible just that the emphasis is on thinking about how to tackle the course in the most interesting way and testing myself against the land forms.

I remember in a medal once my playing partner said he could not understand why people play rounds for fun. What??? He said he only practiced and played medals with the sole intention of lowering his handicap. Do many people view the game like this and if you do is it really something you think is sustainable?

If you were 16 and looked like you had a shot at going pro I see it as a reasonable thing to do but otherwise it is just mind boggling.

Mac, I used to think just a couple of years ago that handicap and competition was everything. I ended up hating the game as much as I hate Woods.
Took a step back, had a winter away due to the weather and then came back with the sole purpose of remembering why I played the game in the first place. As a result of a new attitude my game improved, and my handicap went down.

Playing any sport with an inner calm is the best way to play better in my opinion. I think footballers would do well to learn that as their body language is by and large dreadful.

Interesting article. I can certainly relate to all his points but it wouldn't make me give the game up. I enjoy it too much; even one pured long iron is enough to keep me at it. Have had a couple of periods where played very rarely, if at all, but these were just circumstance.

I think we all have to accept a decline in our standards with age. Might be frustrating thinking "When I was young I could do....." but that's life (and, eventually, death ) I'm afraid.
I find the never-ending technology arms race irritating and I'm with him on that one but, again, I wouldn't give up because of it. In fact, I regularly play with, and against, people who hit the ball surprisingly well off the tee but are complete do-do with anything else. Meanwhile, the technology helps me as well so we end up as far apart as we ever were. All the technology in the World won't help you hit it nearer the sweet spot consistently.
I think the pros have it incredibly easy (cf. earlier eras) which winds me up a bit too. Think the earlier eras would wipe the floor with the current generation assuming kit and fitness were equal.

McLaren wrote:Doon

I have to say that I much prefer a casual game played for the sole purpose of having fun than playing in a medal comp. This does not mean I do not try and score as well as possible just that the emphasis is on thinking about how to tackle the course in the most interesting way and testing myself against the land forms.

I remember in a medal once my playing partner said he could not understand why people play rounds for fun. What??? He said he only practiced and played medals with the sole intention of lowering his handicap. Do many people view the game like this and if you do is it really something you think is sustainable?

If you were 16 and looked like you had a shot at going pro I see it as a reasonable thing to do but otherwise it is just mind boggling.

I think that golf clubs are full of members that are solely playing for this purpose but that doesn't mean it's not fun for them.

I want to be the best I can, but from many years playing other sports I found that if you take the fun factor out of it then a)there is no enjoyment b) you stop improving anyway.

If a sport starts becoming to important you will never improve and may as well walk away. The first thing I learnt when I took up the game (ok not along ago but) a bad game of golf is still better than anyday in the office.

"a bad game of golf is still better than anyday in the office."

This should be the new 606v2 golf moto.

Mac,
My children were born at a time when I was commuting every week from Central New York State to California, away for two weekends a month. Worked all the time I was away, helped Mrs kwini to look after the children when at home.
This went on for about five years and then I moved away to somewhere (here!) I really didn't know anyone to enjoy the craic / camaredrie that I used to enjoy so much. By the time I started playing proper golfcourses again with my son, my swing had gone completely.
Still enjoy the occasional round, at least for the exercise!
Truly paradise lost.

Kwini

Do you think now that you have more time the passion could be reignited?

Mac,
I've been unemployed now for almost ten years, ethnic and age discrimination playing a big part. Am essentially broke so haven't the money to try and resuscitate my golf game, though the love of the sport will always be there.

Kwini

I get the feeling the US is not the easiest place to play the game on a budget and that the cost reason for giving up the game would play a more frequent role than across here in the UK?

For example, I am hardly flush, but can still play as much golf as I want without needing connections in a club for only £350 ($550) a year. I would not be surprised if even a modest private members club in the US worked out at not much less per round. What are the municipal options like in the US in terms of price and tee time availability?

Tee time availability has not been mentioned yet as a reason to give up the game but if people are queuing for several hours to get on a muni it is hard to see them continuing with the game.

PS, it is truly very sad to hear of your problems getting a job. From how you come across on here it is almost astounding that no one could use your talents and general pleasant personality to good use.

Thought you'd been there Mac?

Thought you'd been there Mac?

Where?

America

Strangely enough super, even I did not spend much time carrying out an analysis of the availability of golf for differing wealth levels. Kwini on the other hand will have picked up an understanding of the system over many years.

Sky...The Ubiquitious Chip is the name of a well known Glasgow restraunt.

Mac ..at the time I was playing weekly with a friendly pub club with mainly retired middle handicap players. I found it so frustrating to be still hitting decent shots and scoring the same as guys who did not even know what a good shot felt like.
I had one medal round when I was 7 over after three holes, one over par for the next 12 holes then finished with two sixes and a seven.
It was driving me crazy!

Kwinni...you are a much better and knowledgable golf writer than most of guys that I read.
Have you never thought of going down that line?

Doon,
Perhaps I should . . . . Have tried to hook on to a couple of publications, have been toying around with starting a site myself. Ifs and buts.

Mac,
Availability of reasonably priced golf is high in many parts of the States, especially Central New York where Shotrock and I used to live. Courses there are high calibre and prices are very reasonable.
Whereas VT has few courses, still fewer good courses, and costs are very high.
When I play, it's usually in CNY these days.

Interesting article and comments.
I came to the game late, and only because I was too crocked to play squash.
I love the competition of medal rounds, much more so than matchplay. I get a bit grumpy if don't have something competitive so golf saved me!!!!!!
Most difficult and frustrating game I have ever played, but have as I think Super said found a way of playing peacefully - in part because I would hate to get so frustrated that I didn't want to play. Other advantage is that the more controlled you can be the better you will play - or at least that's how it works for me.
I spend lots on golf but was eventually happy to give up 2 season tickets at Old Trafford to fund it. Really pleased and proud to be part of a game that is played in such good spirit and with pro ranks we can look up to - anybody see Paul Lawrie's acceptance of a penalty last week.
The craic is good, the knowledge of the game is good and discussions like this one most enjoyable. Long may it continue.

Menat to mention a friend that plays in our mixed group has quite a unique swing and as a result his scores (and mood) vary greatly from one week/hole to the next. Has shot single figures and lost almost a dozen balls in a round at our place which is quite forgiving in that regard.
Last summer I was playing in his group and he was having a particularly bad day. Lost another ball on the par 3 13th and that was the end - clubs were being sold when he got home. 14th is also a par3 (223 yards) which he duly holed for his first ever hole in one.

Needless to say he's still giving it a go at the moment

Kwinni'
'Across the Pond'.

Joint UK/USA golf site.
I choose not to have Sky Sports so my knowledge of the current US tour is poor. We all can see the scores but the stories make it interesting.

I don't think advancing years is a reason to give up, or even to feel less inclined. The whole idea of golf handicapping is to compensate for age, declining ability and less time to practice. Inevitably your chipping and putting goes south a bit when you get older as well. Nor do I see the benefit of technology as a reason to give up either.

Somehow it's all about whether you want to keep playing, whether you can find goals you want to achieve and people you want to play with as you get older.

I enjoy playing much more now than when I was 1 or 2 handicap as a 17 year old.

[quote="Fader"]

That is an interesting point and something that is currently impacting on many clubs. Less members means the need to increase fees to keep revenues the same. Which from a business perspective is fine short term but they fail to realise this then cause more members to leave which means less revenue long ter.

I'm looking at joining a private club as an addition to keeping my local municple membership, but so many in my area want a joining fee which I simply refuse to pay, which then means they lose out on my subscription money long term.

Obviously its a different thread but we just had an EGM to consider dropping our joining fee which is where the £2k fees were shown. Unfortunately it got turned down. The reasons seemed a little strange from some which largely ran along the line of being proud that we are the only club in the area that still has one. Itrust they will be very proud of it while wondering why their subs are flying up and people are leaving.

Rant over for today!! I hope you find somewhere.

Saw an article just recently that was the opposite of the letter Mac referenced in the initial post here. It's "play a game that you want to play" on www.geoffshackelford.com. I have that blog on my favorites at work -- it's often a good read. This is a letter from an older man to his younger self, wishing he'd played golf differently -- worth a read.

I can't imagine giving up golf. One of the reasons I always walk is so that when I play really badly I can console myself with the thought that at least I got some fresh air and exercise. Of course I threaten to give up often, but by the time the round is over I can usually find something positive to think about -- maybe a good putt on one hole or a good drive on another or fun people we got paired up with.

By the way, golf on long island can be very expensive. Our local private club charges several thousand joining fee, several thousand per year, another thousand you have to spend in the clubs grill room, and then you have to pay for either a cart or a caddy every round! So we play at Bethpage which does get pretty crowded and painfully slow at times. We get around that by playing late afternoon, either 9 holes or twilight, when you can get out with maybe 10 min wait at most and meet some fun like-minded golfers. Brother in law on cape cod massechusetts on the other hand pays under a thousand for annual membership of the two courses in his town. So it varies hugely by region.

Holidaying in England is a great golfing experience for us because we get to play 18 holes for a reasonable fee, nobody tries to talk us into getting a cart, pace of play is good, locals are very welcoming, and you can get a decent pint afterwards. Can't beat that !

twoeightnine wrote:
Obviously its a different thread but we just had an EGM to consider dropping our joining fee which is where the £2k fees were shown. Unfortunately it got turned down. The reasons seemed a little strange from some which largely ran along the line of being proud that we are the only club in the area that still has one. Itrust they will be very proud of it while wondering why their subs are flying up and people are leaving.

If yours is the best club in the area, then that's the right decision. If it's just one of the pack, then it's clearly not. What joining fees do is to stabilise the turnover of members, since people don't leave just because they fancy playing somewhere else for a year or so. Abandoning joining fees is a big step that a lot of clubs have taken very lightly without thinking through the consequence. It's made budgeting much harder for a lot of clubs because they have no idea how many members they'll have after the subs bill goes out. Keeping joining fees just because every other club in the area is abandoning them is not a good justification though. I hope there's some real business logic going on behind there, because it's a big decision to get wrong.

George1507, I hope that you are right. I can see both sides of the argument. I think that people will stay if you provide a good course (which we do) but would think that we need to get more members in and it is a marketing tool.

Tough one. Most of the people that I play with (who are 35-45, kids,etc) have seriously thought about leaving because of the cost and if the fees have to be hiked up it may be a step too far for them. They've paid the joining fee and while it may be some influence on their decision, its a very small one because at the fee levels we are talking about, they wouldn't be able to come back anyway. Trouble is that we all like the course and the people.