Culture Cup rd 3 (Books)

First topic message reminder :

Round 2 of the Culture Cup 2.0 finally comes to an end, and what a controversial round it turned out to be.  There were accusations of vote rigging (by me, about Adam.  I still think he has cheated), arguments, swearing and threats of physical violence.  But, that’s what great art does.  It inspires opinions, it creates extremes of emotion, it forces people to look into their souls.  Round 2 was great art.  Great art happening in front of our eyes, people.  There were one or two questions about the validity of some picks and, as usual, some invective spewed my way.  But I can handle it.  That’s what great leaders do, provide inspiration in the face of adversity.  It’s water of a ducks back to me.  Or jizz off Sean’s chin if you need a better metaphor.

So who were the movers and shakers in round 2?  Well, the biggest winners were Hero and Harrier who both scored 10 points with Madge and Dusty.  I voted for Madge so I can’t say I’m too disappointed with those choices.  Son Of A Preacher Man is a great song as well so no complaints from me.  Hero and Hammer are at the top of the table with Paul, Treb “Tik Tok” Trebs and 'fathead' Adam breathing down their necks.  That f*cking lunatic Ziggler somehow managed to lobby enough people to vote for his choon and finds himself in second place for round 2 with 8 points.  Adam with Hit Me Baby One More Time somehow claims the last podium position in round 2 with a truly awful song. I’d like to hit all the people that voted for it one more time with a massive claw hammer.  Although that would just involve hitting Adam over his stupid, fat head numerous times as he clearly cheated and rigged the votes.  Jeff and superfly continue their titanic “who is the least sh*t out of two sh*t posters” battle with Jeff’s solitary vote this round enabling him to snuggle up to his great rival on 2 points each in the table.

A few posters continue to languish with no points, with Sean “I lie more than Jay from the Inbetweeners” Michaels, Galted “Massively Gay Way” Mears and Julius “I’m old so I moan.  Deal with it” Marx all yet to break their 2.0 virginity.  Stella has become a bit of an enigma.  He joined late, and now won’t answer my PM’s.  This has forced me to choose for him in round 3.  Hopefully my choice will lift him from the foot of the table.

So the updated table looks like this:

1) Hero 16 pts
2) Harrier 14 pts
3) Paul 12 pts
4) Trebs 10 pts
5) Adam 10 pts
6) Ziggler 9 pts
7) SerialDAVE 7 pts
8) C&R 6 pts
9) Azzy 6 pts
10) weeman 5 pts
11) Nakatomi 4 pts
12) Beadle 4 pts
13) Union Cane 3 pts
14) Shah-abu bakr 3 pts
15) The Boss 3 pts
16) superfly 2 pts
17) Jeff 2 pts
18) Grumpy G*lfer 2 pts
19) Dagless 1 pt
20) Michaels 0 pts
21) Jules 0 pts
22) Ray Mears 0 pts
23) Stella 0 pts

Round 3 takes us to books and question was this:  WHAT IS THE BEST PIECE OF FICTION WRITTEN BY A EUROPEAN?

Please remember, THIS IS OPEN FOR ANYONE ON 606v2 TO VOTE

Thanks.

JuliusHMarx wrote:Best not to mention G String with sean around. There will no doubt be a completely made-up fantasy completely true story of sexual conquest forthcoming.

Bird I lost my virginity to had a set of bloomers on. Poor girl went by the name for the remaining year or so at school.

Is air on a G String the tune from the Hamlet adverts? Dead cultured me.

Rowley wrote:Never trust any man who picks the fifth over the glorious ninth for Beethoven Dave. Agree about those classical types Dave, now jazz listeners on the other hand, those boys are cultured up to the eyeballs.

What about blues listeners Jeff? Or does that just muddy the waters?

Rowley wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Not at all surprised to find that Hero has nominated a book he doesn't like, which was his second choice because his first, another book he doesn't like, was already taken.

Hard to tell if people are nominating the "classics" because they read/enjoyed them or are simply appealing to the populist vote. Same goes for people who listen to Vivaldi's "Four Seasons" or Bach's "Air on a G String" or Beethoven's Fifth.

Never trust any man who picks the fifth over the glorious ninth for Beethoven Dave. Agree about those classical types Dave, now jazz listeners on the other hand, those boys are cultured up to the eyeballs. [/quote]

michaels'd that you spaz.

Nessum Dorma is the only decent classical song. And the one off Gladiator. And the Platoon one.

seanmichaels wrote:

Rowley wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Not at all surprised to find that Hero has nominated a book he doesn't like, which was his second choice because his first, another book he doesn't like, was already taken.

Hard to tell if people are nominating the "classics" because they read/enjoyed them or are simply appealing to the populist vote. Same goes for people who listen to Vivaldi's "Four Seasons" or Bach's "Air on a G String" or Beethoven's Fifth.

Never trust any man who picks the fifth over the glorious ninth for Beethoven Dave. Agree about those classical types Dave, now jazz listeners on the other hand, those boys are cultured up to the eyeballs.

michaels'd that you spaz.[/quote]
Same with those silly ****s who think
MALEVOLENT CREATION's "Retribution" is better than "The Ten Commandments"
SEPULTURA's "Roots" is better than "Beneath the Remains"
METALLICA's "Black Album" is better than "Master of Puppets"
and on it goes......

What about SLIPPERY WHEN WET, SerialDAVE?

That's a pretty hardcore METAL album. Where does that rank?

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:What about SLIPPERY WHEN WET, SerialDAVE?

That's a pretty hardcore METAL album.  Where does that rank?

Is it any better or worse than "Keep the Faith"? They're two slightly different kinds of sh!t as far as I'm concerned, Tina. Both contain songs I know as I've suffered them in order to get my Hampton sticky with numerous rock chicks/chix but it doesn't make them great albums I'm afraid.

DAVE667 wrote:Both contain songs I know as I've suffered them in order to get my Hampton sticky with numerous rock chicks/chix but it doesn't make them great albums I'm afraid.

DAVE, meet sean. Sean, DAVE.

JuliusHMarx wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:Both contain songs I know as I've suffered them in order to get my Hampton sticky with numerous rock chicks/chix but it doesn't make them great albums I'm afraid.

DAVE, meet sean. Sean, DAVE.

Only know the songs through chatting up some woman at the local club...failed miserably on numerous occasions and watched in disgust as they went off with some tool in spandex and eyeshadow instead. Sean would have scored every single time. Me? Missed out more often that not I'm afraid. Still know the f*cking lyrics to loads of sh!t "rock" songs which just adds insult to injury.

You sound bitter.

Were you shot through the heart during that crazy crazy night?

Come on now, SerialDAVE. It will be fine.

Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear.

AEROSMITH had good chick nobbing potential in the mid 90's. Slightly before my heyday but romanced the odd bit of fluff with Crazy, crazy, crazy for you baby

DAVE667 wrote:
Only know the songs through chatting up some woman at the local club...failed miserably on numerous occasions and watched in disgust as they went off with some tool in spandex and eyeshadow instead. Sean would have scored every single time. Me? Missed out more often that not I'm afraid. Still know the f*cking lyrics to loads of sh!t "rock" songs which just adds insult to injury.

There was a time
When I was so broken hearted
Love wasn't much of a friend of mine
The tables have turned, yeah
'Cause me and them ways have parted
That kind of love was the killin' kind

seanmichaels wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:
Only know the songs through chatting up some woman at the local club...failed miserably on numerous occasions and watched in disgust as they went off with some tool in spandex and eyeshadow instead. Sean would have scored every single time. Me? Missed out more often that not I'm afraid. Still know the f*cking lyrics to loads of sh!t "rock" songs which just adds insult to injury.

There was a time
When I was so broken hearted
Love wasn't much of a friend of mine
The tables have turned, yeah
'Cause me and them ways have parted
That kind of love was the killin' kind

Ode to the Head Boy on the last day of school by Sean

ShahenshahG wrote:

Ode to the Head Boy on the last day of school by Sean

By order of the prophet
We ban that boogie sound
Degenerate the faithful
With that crazy Casbah sound
But the Bedouin they brought out
The electric camel drum
The local guitar picker
Got his guitar picking thumb
As soon as the shareef
Had cleared the square
They began to wail

Roller_Coaster wrote:You sound bitter.

Were you shot through the heart during that crazy crazy night?

Of course I'm bitter....you can sit and read Cyrano de Bergerac as much as you bloody like and convince yourself it's a vindication of what you've always believed, namely that it's what's inside that counts but the truth of the matter is that these woman were more interested in dating glam rock boys who wore tassled jackets and spangly scarves around their waists as opposed to sleeping with big dicked thrasher/death metal types. Of course I'm incredibly shallow as I always went for the ones with the biggest t!ts but I'm a bloke and it's in my job description to be a moron.

ShahenshahG wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:
Only know the songs through chatting up some woman at the local club...failed miserably on numerous occasions and watched in disgust as they went off with some tool in spandex and eyeshadow instead. Sean would have scored every single time. Me? Missed out more often that not I'm afraid. Still know the f*cking lyrics to loads of sh!t "rock" songs which just adds insult to injury.

There was a time
When I was so broken hearted
Love wasn't much of a friend of mine
The tables have turned, yeah
'Cause me and them ways have parted
That kind of love was the killin' kind

Ode to the Head Boy on the last day of school by Sean

Think Sean was known as the "head" boy wasn't he?

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Rowley wrote:Never trust any man who picks the fifth over the glorious ninth for Beethoven Dave. Agree about those classical types Dave, now jazz listeners on the other hand, those boys are cultured up to the eyeballs.

What about blues listeners Jeff? Or does that just muddy the waters?

I can't imagine many culture cup regulars know bo diddley about the blues.

DAVE667 wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:
Only know the songs through chatting up some woman at the local club...failed miserably on numerous occasions and watched in disgust as they went off with some tool in spandex and eyeshadow instead. Sean would have scored every single time. Me? Missed out more often that not I'm afraid. Still know the f*cking lyrics to loads of sh!t "rock" songs which just adds insult to injury.

There was a time
When I was so broken hearted
Love wasn't much of a friend of mine
The tables have turned, yeah
'Cause me and them ways have parted
That kind of love was the killin' kind

Ode to the Head Boy on the last day of school by Sean

Think Sean was known as the "head" boy wasn't he?

He was actually known as the c*ck depository

DAVE667 wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Rowley wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Not at all surprised to find that Hero has nominated a book he doesn't like, which was his second choice because his first, another book he doesn't like, was already taken.

Hard to tell if people are nominating the "classics" because they read/enjoyed them or are simply appealing to the populist vote. Same goes for people who listen to Vivaldi's "Four Seasons" or Bach's "Air on a G String" or Beethoven's Fifth.

Never trust any man who picks the fifth over the glorious ninth for Beethoven Dave. Agree about those classical types Dave, now jazz listeners on the other hand, those boys are cultured up to the eyeballs.

michaels'd that you spaz.

Same with those silly ****s who think
MALEVOLENT CREATION's "Retribution" is better than "The Ten Commandments"
SEPULTURA's "Roots" is better than "Beneath the Remains"
METALLICA's "Black Album" is better than "Master of Puppets"
and on it goes......

[/quote]

Or anyone who thinks Sepultura's "Beneath the Remains" is better than "Chaos A.D.".

How can cr@p like Britney Spears get me points and my pick this round only muster 1 vote? One of the all time classics and fairly standard reading at school?

Been made numerous times into a movie.

Last time I pick something genuinely good as opposed to popular.

I think you pick neither good nor popular.

I long since realised it does not do to try and guess what will attract points Adam. My pick in this round is arguably my lowest brow pick thus far (albeit is still brilliant) and is my highest points scorer.

Hero wrote:I think you pick neither good nor popular.

I picked you for a co-host on the podcast so you are 100% right

The people pick me and my award winning jingles

Hammersmith harrier wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Rowley wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Not at all surprised to find that Hero has nominated a book he doesn't like, which was his second choice because his first, another book he doesn't like, was already taken.

Hard to tell if people are nominating the "classics" because they read/enjoyed them or are simply appealing to the populist vote. Same goes for people who listen to Vivaldi's "Four Seasons" or Bach's "Air on a G String" or Beethoven's Fifth.

Never trust any man who picks the fifth over the glorious ninth for Beethoven Dave. Agree about those classical types Dave, now jazz listeners on the other hand, those boys are cultured up to the eyeballs.

michaels'd that you spaz.

Same with those silly ****s who think
MALEVOLENT CREATION's "Retribution" is better than "The Ten Commandments"
SEPULTURA's "Roots" is better than "Beneath the Remains"
METALLICA's "Black Album" is better than "Master of Puppets"
and on it goes......

Or anyone who thinks Sepultura's "Beneath the Remains" is better than "Chaos A.D.".[/quote]
F*ck "Chaos A.D." It was the death knell for Sepultura...even "Arise" was better than that turdburger. They tried leaping onto the nu-metal bandwagon and it was downhill from then on in as far as I'm concerned.

I like REM. They rock!!!

Galted wrote:I like REM. They rock!!!

You also make gloves out of toilet paper so I think we can dispense with your opinion on anything, GALTED

DAVE667 wrote:

Galted wrote:I like REM. They rock!!!

You also make gloves out of toilet paper so I think we can dispense with your opinion on anything, GALTED

Gore-Tex?
Jack Wolfskin?
Internet Russian brides?
Cargo pants?
Sh*t trainers from the 1980's?
The life and times of Ray Mears?

I don't think you should be so quick to dismiss Galted, SerialDAVE.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Galted wrote:I like REM. They rock!!!

You also make gloves out of toilet paper so I think we can dispense with your opinion on anything, GALTED

Gore-Tex?
Jack Wolfskin?
Internet Russian brides?
Cargo pants?
Sh*t trainers from the 1980's?
The life and times of Ray Mears?

I don't think you should be so quick to dismiss Galted, SerialDAVE.

Maybe the top 3 and number 5. 4 and 6 are just products of your stalkerish imagination.

Galted wrote:4 and 6 are just products of your stalkerish imagination.

That is just a fraction of what I imagine about you, Galted.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Galted wrote:I like REM. They rock!!!

You also make gloves out of toilet paper so I think we can dispense with your opinion on anything, GALTED

Gore-Tex?
Jack Wolfskin?
Internet Russian brides?
Cargo pants?
Sh*t trainers from the 1980's?
The life and times of Ray Mears?

I don't think you should be so quick to dismiss Galted, SerialDAVE.

I used to like GALTED, I really did (not as much as I like you Tina, that would be nigh on impossible) but I'm afraid this toilet paper glove thing has made me question whether or not it's worth paying money to visit Galted and kill him. It sickens me to the pit of my stomach and I've wallowed in the offal of slaughtered whores which should tell you how disgusted I am by his actions.

DAVE667 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Galted wrote:I like REM. They rock!!!

You also make gloves out of toilet paper so I think we can dispense with your opinion on anything, GALTED

Gore-Tex?
Jack Wolfskin?
Internet Russian brides?
Cargo pants?
Sh*t trainers from the 1980's?
The life and times of Ray Mears?

I don't think you should be so quick to dismiss Galted, SerialDAVE.

I used to like GALTED, I really did (not as much as I like you Tina, that would be nigh on impossible) but I'm afraid this toilet paper glove thing has made me question whether or not it's worth paying money to visit Galted and kill him. It sickens me to the pit of my stomach and I've wallowed in the offal of slaughtered whores which should tell you how disgusted I am by his actions.

The alternative was Galtova's wrath. I should added in my original post that the toilet flush had the same strength and volume of a 90-year-old having a slash.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:4 and 6 are just products of your stalkerish imagination.

That is just a fraction of what I imagine about you, Galted.

Do you imagine scenarios, exchanges, f*cking?

Galted wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

Galted wrote:I like REM. They rock!!!

You also make gloves out of toilet paper so I think we can dispense with your opinion on anything, GALTED

Gore-Tex?
Jack Wolfskin?
Internet Russian brides?
Cargo pants?
Sh*t trainers from the 1980's?
The life and times of Ray Mears?

I don't think you should be so quick to dismiss Galted, SerialDAVE.

I used to like GALTED,  I really did (not as much as I like you Tina, that would be nigh on impossible) but I'm afraid this toilet paper glove thing has made me question whether or not it's worth paying money to visit Galted and kill him. It sickens me to the pit of my stomach and I've wallowed in the offal of slaughtered whores which should tell you how disgusted I am by his actions.

The alternative was Galtova's wrath.  I should added in my original post that the toilet flush had the same strength and volume of a 90-year-old having a slash.

OK we get the idea. No need to get personal.

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:4 and 6 are just products of your stalkerish imagination.

That is just a fraction of what I imagine about you, Galted.

Do you imagine scenarios, exchanges, f*cking?

I'm imagining strangling you with the laces from your Hi-tecs

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:4 and 6 are just products of your stalkerish imagination.

That is just a fraction of what I imagine about you, Galted.

Do you imagine scenarios, exchanges, f*cking?

I'm imagining SerialDAVE strangling you with the laces from your sh*t trainers.

I may have come to the Hi-Tec party late on this one but all I remember about Hi-Tecs was that they were always the choice of the unpopular kid at school who couldn't convince his mum to buy him Nike or Adidas, they were below the Dunlop, Diadora, Reebok and Puma kids they were that bad. Come to school in a pair of Hi-Tecs and you'd quickly have a rather disparaging nickname for the rest of school.

Hero wrote:I may have come to the Hi-Tec party late on this one but all I remember about Hi-Tecs was that they were always the choice of the unpopular kid at school who couldn't convince his mum to buy him Nike or Adidas, they were below the Dunlop, Diadora, Reebok and Puma kids they were that bad. Come to school in a pair of Hi-Tecs and you'd quickly have a rather disparaging nickname for the rest of school.

l*l out loud.

Hero wrote:I may have come to the Hi-Tec party late on this one but all I remember about Hi-Tecs was that they were always the choice of the unpopular kid at school who couldn't convince his mum to buy him Nike or Adidas, they were below the Dunlop, Diadora, Reebok and Puma kids they were that bad. Come to school in a pair of Hi-Tecs and you'd quickly have a rather disparaging nickname for the rest of school.

Hi-Tec BADMINTON and SQUASH have made a very minor comeback although the retro thing only stretches so far IMO (Adidas Samba)

Hi-tec "Slammer" were the basketball boot of choice for the discerning 80's thrasher. Stretch black denim jeans, leather biker jacket (cut off denim jacket worn over the top...optional) and a pair of Hi-tec Slammers......bootiful!!!!

I play squash and wear Hi-Tec. They are certainly making a comeback in that sense but I wouldn't go in town wearing them.

Trebs wrote:I play squash and wear Hi-Tec. They are certainly making a comeback in that sense but I wouldn't go in town wearing them.

What if you were Galted combined them with cargo pants and a Gore-Tex jacket?  You'd look like a right Mr Fancy.

I showed pictures of several Hi-Tec trainers to the resident younger person in the office, he said they looked mongie.

Hero wrote:I showed pictures of several Hi-Tec trainers to the resident younger person in the office, he said they looked mongie.

Young people are all c*nts anyway...no sartorial elegance, style or panache. Just a bunch of clotheshorses desperately trying to display their own unique style and sense of individuality by wearing the same off the peg sh!te as all the other young frigtards.

Maturity comes when you are happy to wear what you want and care not a jot for the opinions of others....this only applies to people who aren't GALTED.....he's clearly an idiot and quite possibly a sex-offender in training

Style tips from the man in the SLAYER T Shirt, who says we don't do culture round here?

Rowley wrote:Style tips from the man in the SLAYER T Shirt, who says we don't do culture round here?

Bald man in a SLAYER T Shirt, Jeff. Don't forget the bald bit.

DAVE667 wrote:Young people are all c*nts anyway...

That's true, you all are.

Hero wrote:I may have come to the Hi-Tec party late on this one but all I remember about Hi-Tecs was that they were always the choice of the unpopular kid at school who couldn't convince his mum to buy him Nike or Adidas, they were below the Dunlop, Diadora, Reebok and Puma kids they were that bad. Come to school in a pair of Hi-Tecs and you'd quickly have a rather disparaging nickname for the rest of school.

Exactly the same at my school although Puma werent in the lower category. Kids had Reebok Pumps and other popular brands (from memory) were Fila and British Knights.

Puma took a nose dive after Bravestarr came out and pronounced it pooma. Who wants pooma trainers?