The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

First topic message reminder :

What, now?

Morning Tino

Cheshire cheese is Britains oldest cheese I believe...

How are you this fine day?

rick_dagless wrote:Morning Tino

Cheshire cheese is Britains oldest cheese I believe...

How are you this fine day?

Well I never. Every day is a school day, Ricko.

I'm alright actually. My old man and dearest mother are heading down the M6 as we speak. They shall be at home to welcome me later.

The reason for the story is that I am actually (quite possibly for the first time) looking forward to watching a football game this evening. Watching Scotland v England with a bad tempered Jock father and an English son who is a constant source of disappointment is the perfect setting for some winding up. If England win or even score, I reckon I can tip him over the edge pretty quickly. I going to count how many times he says f*ck, bastard or f*cking bastard in 90 minutes. It will be a lot.

How are you?

I am pretty good, I traditionally enhoy the auld enemy games, but I just can not be bothered with the national side at the moment.

Saying that though, I hope we absolutley trounce them...

rick_dagless wrote:I am pretty good, I traditionally enhoy the auld enemy games, but I just can not be bothered with the national side at the moment.

Saying that though, I hope we absolutley trounce them...

I can never be bothered with them, but today is an exception.

I'm not a duck in Nafferton.

Well I hope it goes your way abuse wise...

I guess we could be seeing a lot of super in the next few days if not...

Tempted to watch the Argentina/Portugal game to see if Lionel Messi does the planet a favour and punches Ronaldo's head clean off his shoulders

DAVE667 wrote:Tempted to watch the Argentina/Portugal game to see if Lionel Messi does the planet a favour and punches Ronaldo's head clean off his shoulders

That's a mismatch. Ronaldo would batter him.

You would batter him. He's the size of a 7 year old. Wait....

seanmichaels wrote:You would batter him. He's the size of a 7 year old. Wait....

And f*ck you, Michaels.

Reckon Galted's on borrowed time now Galtova's got residency?

seanmichaels wrote:Reckon Galted's on borrowed time now Galtova's got residency?

Her 4 brothers, 3 sisters, mum, dad, 2 grandparents, 4 cousins and an uncle are unpacking as we speak.

seanmichaels wrote:Reckon Galted's on borrowed time now Galtova's got residency?

Doubt it, I'm an excellent catch.

Idiot jobsworth Scottish security guard's loudly trying to drum up some football interest in the deli. So far the only one who's biting is a W Indian bird who works behind the counter. She doesn't really understand what he's saying so it's pretty entertaining.

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:Reckon Galted's on borrowed time now Galtova's got residency?

Doubt it, I'm an excellent catch.

Big call for cargo pants and tank tops amongst Eastern Europeans then?

Not sure, Glated could probably enlighten you though.

I find that my happy-go-lucky nature, athletic build and ability to understand cats helps me.

Galted wrote:Not sure, Glated could probably enlighten you though.

I'd love to be enlightened by Glated.

Have you any amusing anecdotes about walks by Liverpool St station that you'd like to share? I used to love them.

Sod you and your sarcasm you northern bastard.

do they do silly Russian dance?

rick_dagless wrote:Well I hope it goes your way abuse wise...

I guess we could be seeing a lot of super in the next few days if not...

Nah - never really supported the national team and am neither up nor down if they win or lose. Can't stand the Tartan Army though, so would happily join in if you guys want to start a firm and beat seven shades of sh1t out of the clichéd bunch of backward, "look at me", "please love us" w@nkers. Nearly as bad as the Irish.

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm  

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius. That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

More of an infirm in my case.

I do a decent Joe Jordan impression if that would help?

'I didinee getta prauper looooook at et'.

(works better in person.)

seanmichaels wrote:I do a decent Joe Jordan impression if that would help?

'I didinee getta prauper looooook at et'.

(works better in person.)

I do an excellent impression of Steven Gerrard but that also works better in person so you'll just have to trust me.

this is scary - http://caliser.com/when-selfies-go-wrong-deadly-selfies/?utm_source=taboola&utm_medium=dailymail-uk

Is the first shark one true do we think?

rick_dagless wrote:Is the first shark one true do we think?

I'm not sure either of the shark ones are true.

The article says they are true so I guess so?

Watched Jaws yesterday afternoon. Cracking film.

rick_dagless wrote:

My favourite Lincoln quote is:

A-Linc wrote: Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.

I think a few of the mods could learn from this.  I talking about Jeff, Adam and Union.

Not Jules as he never abuses his power.

"If I had to choose between dribbling past 5 players and scoring from 40 yards at Anfield or shagging Miss World, it'd be a hard choice. Thankfully, I've done both."

seanmichaels wrote:"If I had to choose between dribbling past 5 players and scoring from 40 yards at Anfield or shagging Miss World, it'd be a hard choice. Thankfully, I've done both."

Lincoln never said that.

George Best

Legend.

I knew who it was.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
I think a few of the mods could learn from this.  I talking about Jeff, Adam and Union.

Not Jules as he never abuses his power.

Thats because he does feck all around here.

And I have never abused my powers. Go and make me a cuppa sean, or I will ban you.

Would love to make you one. I make a crap cup of tea.

seanmichaels wrote:Would love to make you one. I ma[y ta]ke a crap [ in your] cup of tea.

I think thats what you were meaning to say

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm  

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius. That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

Galted wrote:I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

I can pull off quite an intimidating swagger from a distance...

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm   

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius.  That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

Yes but you're also as soft as sh*te.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm   

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius.  That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

Yes but you're also as soft as sh*te.

Nonsense, I'm dead hard. Refused to give up my seat on the tube for a blind person a few weeks ago and called some old fart who made an issue of it a "phuckwit".

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm   

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius.  That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

Yes but you're also as soft as sh*te.

Nonsense, I'm dead hard. Refused to give up my seat on the tube for a blind person a few weeks ago and called some old fart who made an issue of it a "phuckwit".

Wingrove told me about that incident.

His version is that the 'old fart' who made an issue was actually a 94 year women who had arthritic hips. Word is she nutted you, called you a spazza and threw you out on the next station. Then the whole train laughed at your sh*t Hi-Tec's as it pulled away.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm   

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius.  That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

Yes but you're also as soft as sh*te.

Nonsense, I'm dead hard. Refused to give up my seat on the tube for a blind person a few weeks ago and called some old fart who made an issue of it a "phuckwit".

Wingrove told me about that incident.

His version is that the 'old fart' who made an issue was actually a 94 year women who had arthritic hips.  Word is she nutted you, called you a spazza and threw you out on the next station.  Then the whole train laughed at your sh*t Hi-Tec's as it pulled away.

My Movember effort has caused a viewed nursery staff and MILF vaginas to tingle and froth in delight this week. The arousal it causes may give any assailants some pause for thought as they come to terms with the rush of hormones flooding through their bodies thus giving us time to launch a blistering attack of face removing ferocity...or alternatively, allow Tina time to run and hide/sh!t himself behind a wheelie bin.

Problem is, come the end of the month I'm shaving the damn thing off so our window of opportunity to be the hardest "kick the f*ck out of you, your nan and her stupid dog" firm is quite limited. Come December, we're being taken to hospital by the bucket load

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm   

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius.  That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

Yes but you're also as soft as sh*te.

Nonsense, I'm dead hard. Refused to give up my seat on the tube for a blind person a few weeks ago and called some old fart who made an issue of it a "phuckwit".

Wingrove told me about that incident.

His version is that the 'old fart' who made an issue was actually a 94 year women who had arthritic hips. Word is she nutted you, called you a spazza and threw you out on the next station. Then the whole train laughed at your sh*t Hi-Tec's as it pulled away.

Leave the Hi-Tecs out of it or I'll phucking cut you.

They're not sh*t.

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

superflyweight wrote:happily join in if you guys want to start a firm   

Me, Jeff, Ricko, Sean, Galted and Julius.  That would be the least intimidating firm of all time.

If we got Dave involved we might be able to scare a bunch of female nursery teachers but other than that, we'd be f*cking hopeless.

I've got a hammer and steel-toe-capped safety boots.

Yes but you're also as soft as sh*te.

Nonsense, I'm dead hard. Refused to give up my seat on the tube for a blind person a few weeks ago and called some old fart who made an issue of it a "phuckwit".

Wingrove told me about that incident.

His version is that the 'old fart' who made an issue was actually a 94 year women who had arthritic hips.  Word is she nutted you, called you a spazza and threw you out on the next station.  Then the whole train laughed at your sh*t Hi-Tec's as it pulled away.

Leave the Hi-Tecs out of it or I'll phucking cut you.

They're not sh*t.

They're not great either!

They were pretty good in 1988.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:They were pretty good in 1988.

When they were badminton/squash trainers or when the thrash metal kids (of whom I was one) used to wear the Hi-tec Slammer white basketball boots?

Briefly dragging us back to popular music, is all the money from Band Aid going to tackle Ebola or are we going to syphon off a few quid to tackle the latest strain of Bird Flu that's supposedly going to kill us before the weekend?

And what the f*ck is going on with the price of peanut butter these days? It's nearly doubled in ASDA and even ALDI can't manage to get the price down to much under a quid...b*stards.

DAVE667 wrote:

And what the f*ck is going on with the price of peanut butter these days? It's nearly doubled in ASDA and even ALDI can't manage to get the price down to much under a quid...b*stards.

Supply and demand David.

If people stuck to eating it (me) and not wasting precious supplies by spreading it over their bodies whilst they bash one out over Kerrang magazine (you) we wouldn't have this issue.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

DAVE667 wrote:

And what the f*ck is going on with the price of peanut butter these days? It's nearly doubled in ASDA and even ALDI can't manage to get the price down to much under a quid...b*stards.

Supply and demand David.

If people stuck to eating it (me) and not wasting precious supplies by spreading it over their bodies whilst they bash one out over Kerrang magazine (you) we wouldn't have this issue.

If you pay peanuts you get monkeys, Tino Jr should pay better to get better staff. Will help his anger issues also.