Random Thoughts....

Triple H got a vote of no confidence on RAW. Bit gutted at the very end as I was really hoping Jim Ross was going to stick around for next week’s show, which would have been an hour long Triple H monologue followed by the Game-uhh in a 60 minute Iron Man match against himself, with JR on commentary. Reckon Triple H would have any problems doing the job to Triple H? Probably. That’d be a great conversation with the booking team though:


“You’re going over”.

“Nice-uhh. Who’s doing the job-uhh?”

“Erm……..you are”.

“NO WAY-UHH!”

“But…..you’re going to win”.

“That’s better-uhh. Who’s losing-uhh?”

“……….You?”


“NO CHANCE IN HELL-UHH! NOT ON MY WATCH-UHH!”

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Want to know how WWE can attract those elusive casual fans? A blind wrestler. He could come sauntering out every week with his guide dog (in the same vein as Eddie Guerrero and Alberto Del Rio with their cars it’d be a different dog every week), and prior to each one of his matches the referee would have to tie a bell around his opponent’s neck. Jim Ross could nickname him the Sightless Warrior (BAH GAWD!). And just imagine this scintillating backstage exchange with John Cena:


Cena: “You can’t see me!”

Blind Wrestler: “I know”

Cena: “Oh………I…….um…….what?”

Say hello to 356 million new viewers WWE.

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As for Mr. Hustle, Loyalty & Respect it seems he’s been knocked off the top spot of WWE merchandise sellers by CM Punk. That can mean only 2 things: a new John Cena t-shirt will be brought out in double quick time and Arn Anderson will tell everyone that Paul Heyman has been fiddling the numbers and Punk’s merchandise isn’t really selling as well as everyone’s making out. He’ll then tell WWE they need to bring out a Hardcore Holly t-shirt. Which they will.

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Anyone else think that CM Punk and the Miz & R-Truth have got their a bit storylines mixed up at the moment? Punk is the anti-authority babyface who just goes around whining and complaining, whereas the Miz and R-Truth are the anti-authority heels who get to do cool stuff like beat-downs, showing up despite being fired and getting arrested. Seems a bit ass backward if you ask me. It’s almost as if WWE want Punk to fail….. CM PUNK = JOHN RAMBO.

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Batista needs to be brought back to RAW so they can replicate the Sin Cara storyline with him and Mason Ryan. I can already feel the electricity in the air as they face off for the first time, with Booker T shouting on commentary “WHOA! BUT WHICH ONE’S THE REAL BATISTA?!? OH MY GOODNESS!” Then Jim Ross will pipe in with “Sit down Book”.

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I can’t be the only person anxiously awaiting the backstage skit on Smackdown involving Mark Henry and Justin Gabriel where Henry states that he’s the World Heavyweight Champion and Gabriel replies with “But….but….but…..but…. you’re bleck?” It’ll be all kinds of awesome.

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Idea for the Diva’s division – intimidating nicknames for them all. Beth Phoenix is pretty much the only Diva with a proper nickname, and ‘The Glamazon’ doesn’t exactly incite fear now does it? Kinda makes her sound like a Vegas drag queen. So from now on Kelly Kelly will be known as ‘The Harbinger of Doom’, Eve Torres will be ‘The Bone Shatterer’ and the Bellas will be ‘Famine & Pestilence’.

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I think we can all agree that John Morrison needs to be repackaged. But what to do with him? I reckon they should turn him into a peace-loving beatnik. Give him a beret, a black & white stripy jumper that’s 2 sizes to small for him, skin tight black trousers and sandals. Have him grow a soul patch and make him wear wire-rimmed glasses. He’d carry a tambourine around with him, which he’d hit every time he was about to say something, and it would always be along the lines of “Hey man. What are we fighting for man? Let’s give peace a chance. Feel your inner groove and let your spirit soar man”. Then he’d get smacked in the mouth. Melina could play the role of his dirty, smelly, hippy girlfriend. She’s already got two of those three traits anyway.

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Why does Jesse Sorensen bring a football with him to the ring every week? Because he used to play American football in college? Big deal. Karen Jarrett used to be a stripper but you don’t see her shedding clothes for money every week on Impact. That’s Ric Flair’s job.

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Speaking of the NAITCHA F**KING BWAAAAH MOTHERF**KER! now that the term ‘anal bleeding’ has entered the wrestling lexicon, do you think that Ric Flair will start blading his own ass? I like to think he will.

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Isn’t it about time Vince Russo came up with another ridiculous match in TNA? Like a Reverse Buried Alive match. Or an Under the Ring Battle Royal. Or a 60 Minute Submission Elimination No Disqualification Pin-falls Count Only Over the Top Rope If There’s A Disqualification the Title Changes Hands match. Or Sting versus Hulk Hogan. Oh wait…..

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I miss reading about Dixie Clueless and her nonsensical tweets. Is she still on Twitter? Whether it was teasing a MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT that would SHOCK THE WORLD and change the face of professional wrestling FOREVER or tweeting about finishing a workout then drinking a Stella I miss her inane ramblings. I think I’ll start following her. I suppose I could sign up for Twitter too.

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TNA need to replace Taz on colour commentary. For me, the obvious choice is Dusty Rhodes. I mean who wouldn’t love to hear the American Dream commenting on the shenanigans that take place on Impact every week?

“Koot Ango jutht hit Mith-tah Anduh-thin wit da steeeeel chay-uh! He be crackin’ him up-thide da hay-ed! Whut ith thith bith-neth that’th goin’ on all up in hee-yuh? TH-TING! Hee-yuh come-th Th-ting! Go get ‘im Th-tinger! WHUT DA HEY-ELL! Th-ting jutht kicked Mith-tah Anduh-thin in da nut-th! He be goin’ to town on Mith-tah Anduh-thin! Whut ith thith? RIC FLAY! Da Naitcha BWAAAAAH! He be ath nekked ath da day he wuth bawn! Wha he got no clothe-th on? HITH ATH ITH BLEEDIN’! HITH ATH BE BUTH-TED WAAAAD OPEN! Now he be pokin’ Koot Ango in da eye! Jee-thuth! Da Ameh-ican Dweem ith all pontificatin’ bout da reprecussion-th of thi-th hee-yuh thituation. In puh-lic if yew weel”.

Translation;

“Kurt Angle just hit Mister Anderson with a steel chair. He hit him right in the head. What’s going on here? Sting. Here comes Sting. Go get him Stinger. What the heck? Sting just low blowed Mister Anderson. He’s really laying into him. What is this? Ric Flair. The Nature Boy. He’s as naked as the day he was born. Why isn’t he wearing any clothes? He appears to have anal bleeding. He just poked Kurt Angle in the eye. Good heavens. I’m confused. In public if you will”.

Tell me you wouldn’t be glued to Impact every week.

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Matt Hardy. They tried to make him go to rehab but he said “NOM. NOM. NOM”. Because he was stuffing his face with a gravy-smothered cake at the time.

The blind Wrestler idea is all different kinds of awesome

Want to know how WWE can attract those elusive casual fans? A blind wrestler. He could come sauntering out every week with his guide dog (in the same vein as Eddie Guerrero and Alberto Del Rio with their cars it’d be a different dog every week), and prior to each one of his matches the referee would have to tie a bell around his opponent’s neck. Jim Ross could nickname him the Sightless Warrior (BAH GAWD!). And just imagine this scintillating backstage exchange with John Cena:


Cena: “You can’t see me!”

Blind Wrestler: “I know”

Cena: “Oh………I…….um…….what?”



Wrestling will be forever ruined for me if this does not happen

My random thought is when Mike Choida was saying WWE is an unsafe working enviroment Mark 'Ratings' Henry is stood at the foot of the ring nodding his freaking head in agreement

In the last 2 months he has nearly killed the Pyro technician and put, Show, Kane. Kozlov and Khali on the shelf, why the fluck is he nodding, Mark Henry IS the unsafe working enviroment...

Yeah but he is the equivalent of a deranged Churchill dog. Storming into your house, breaking your leg and eating up your pet cat. Then trying to sell you house, health and pet insurance.

Incidently, when has Henry EVER been safe?

"Reckon Triple H would have any problems doing the job to Triple H?"

Love it

In a sick way, I hope Ric Flair blades his ass.

I spat cola all over my keyboard when I read "Sit down Book"

You owe me a new keyboard.