Ulster Rugby v Glasgow Warriors, 13 September

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Ulster Rugby v Glasgow Warriors
 
Friday 13th September 2013, KO 19:05
Ravenhill Stadium, Belfast
 
Referee: Ian Davies (WRU, 9th competition game)
Assistant Referees: Gary Conway, Kevin Beggs (both IRFU)
Citing Commissioner: John West (IRFU)
TMO: Peter Ferguson (IRFU)

Live on BBC NI and BBC ALBA
 
A. Teams:
 
1. Ulster  
 
15 J Payne
14 D McIlwaine
13 D Cave
12 L Marshall
11 M Allen
10 P Jackson
09 I Porter
 
01. C Black
02 R Herring
03 D Fitzpatrick
04 J Muller (Captain)
05 D Tuohy
06 R Wilson
07 S Doyle
08 N Williams
 
16. N Annett
17. T Court
18. R Lutton
19. I Henderson
20. C Henry
21. P Marshall
22. J McKinney
23.  R Andrew

 
2. Glasgow  
 
15. Stuart Hogg
14. Tommy Seymour
13. Sean Lamont
12. Mark Bennett
11. DTH van der Merwe
10. Ruaridh Jackson
9. Henry Pyrgos (Captain)
 
01. Ryan Grant  
02. Pat MacArthur
03. Ed Kalman
04. Tim Swinson
05. Jonny Gray
06. Rob Harley
07. Tyrone Holmes
08. Josh Strauss
 
16. Dougie Hall
17. Gordon Reid
18. Moray Low
19. James Eddie  
20. Chris Fusaro
21. Richie Vernon
22. Chris Cusiter
23. Gabriel Ascarate
 
B. Form - head to head:
 
27 Played 27
15 Wins 11
11 Losses 15
1 Draws 1
49 Tries 43
31 Conversions 29
71 Penalties 64
2 Drop Goals 7
526 Points 486
26 Avg. Age 26
 
C. Form - last season:
 
Friday 31 August 2012, 19:05: Ravenhill
Ulster Rugby 18 - 10 Glasgow Warriors
 
Friday 22 February 2013, 19:35: Scotstoun
Glasgow Warriors 20 - 14 Ulster Rugby
 
D. Glasgow fans lexicon:
 
Time on these boards has demonstrated that Glasgow fans use an uncommonly broad selection of nicknames and slang to describe the various members of their team.
 
For those unfamiliar with this gibberish:
 
Alphabetty Spaghetti - D.T.H. van der Merwe, wing
Angel - Gabriel Ascarate, centre
Angela - Jon Welsh, prop
Barry - Byron McGuigan, wing
Big Boab - (see Ginger Tackle Monster, the)
Big Mike - (see Coo, the)
Big Naka - Leone Nakarawa, lock/loosie
Bluto - Josh Strauss, loosie/no.8
Centre, the - (see Lesser Messiah, the)
Coo, the - Michael Cusack, prop
Cooseetah - (see Cus)
Cus - Chris Cusiter, scrum half
DTH - (see Alphabetty Spaghetti)
Flippy - (see Toonie)
Fozzy - Christopher Fusaro, loosie
Furra Lineeeee - Peter Horne, centre
Ginger Tackle Monster, the - Rob Harley, loosie
Guns - Tim Swinson, lock
Henners - Henry Pyrgos, scrum half
Hoggy - Stuart Hogg, full back/wing/centre
Ickle Jon - Jonny Gray, lock
Jedi - James Eddie, loosie
Lesser Messiah, the - Richie Vernon, loosie/no.8
Mark of Nazareth - (see Messiah, the)
Meatball, the - Duncan Weir, fly half
Messiah, the/   - Mark Bennett, centre
Niko - Nikola Matawalu, scrum half
Niko's Mate - Jerry Yanuyanutawa, prop
No Maits - Sean Maitland, wing
Rhubarb - Ruaridh Jackson, fly half
Ruck Inspector, the - Alastair Kellock, lock
Schlong - Sean Lamont, centre/wing
Sherlock - Tyrone Holmes, loosie
Shrek - Gordon Reid, prop
Toonie - Gregor Peter John Townsend MBE, head coach
Wee P - Pat MacArthur, hooker
Weegie from Fiji, the - (see Niko)

If only the IRB rankings were done on the quality of posts on here, Scotland would be flying high.....

IanBru wrote:Scott Wight is like that girl who tags along on a night out. She knows you're single you know she's single. You also know she has three cats and calls her mother three times a day (and what student keeps a cat? Honestly.). Whatever happens that night is inevitable from the outset and can only be blamed on adverse circumstances, but you can't help thinking that one party is getting more from the experience than the other.

By contrast, Finn Russell is like your friend's hot sister - you know that there's a danger if you try anything serious, but the rewards could be awesome.

 post of the week at the very least.

IanBru wrote:Scott Wight is like that girl who tags along on a night out. She knows you're single you know she's single. You also know she has three cats and calls her mother three times a day (and what student keeps a cat? Honestly.). Whatever happens that night is inevitable from the outset and can only be blamed on adverse circumstances, but you can't help thinking that one party is getting more from the experience than the other.

By contrast, Finn Russell is like your friend's hot sister - you know that there's a danger if you try anything serious, but the rewards could be awesome.

Thanks for explaining the situation in terms everyone can understand  

From an Ulster PoV, there's talk that Ian Porter will start ahead of Paul Marshall. I think not giving Porter a deal in the first place was a mistake, but now he's back I'm pleased to see him getting chances. But whats interesting about that is that in club rugby he was a very high percentage goal kicker.

Loving your work, Bru.

The hype regarding Russell is gathering a pace. Not without substance though - I kept track of his performances in NZ. He was voted the MVP for the league he was playing in and Robbie Fruean tweeted a few comments about how good his performances were after a league game they played together. Not bad on top of guiding Ayr to victory last season.

One criticism is that he doesn't really look ready physically, I would hate to see the aftermath of A Nick Williams type character coming full steam down his channel.

funnyExiledScot wrote:That is slim pickings!

How does Atiga fit into the analogy??

No analogy with Ben Atiga can involve the word "slim".
 
Unless the analogy involves his chances of scoring a try or walking past a bakery.

EST wrote:Loving your work, Bru.

The hype regarding Russell is gathering a pace. Not without substance though - I kept track of his performances in NZ. He was voted the MVP for the league he was playing in and Robbie Fruean tweeted a few comments about how good his performances were after a league game they played together. Not bad on top of guiding Ayr to victory last season.

One criticism is that he doesn't really look ready physically, I would hate to see the aftermath of A Nick Williams type character coming full steam down his channel.

Don't worry, he'd have Mark Bennett to help him out!

Excellent work Bru.
I had a dream last night; on the way to work I stopped at a dodgy garage and swapped my reliable hatchback for a bright red soft top two seater. Upon arriving at work I discovered lots of hidden flaws and faults and realised it wasn't as wonderful as I first thought. So Ruaridh is starting against the Ulstermen I take it. God help me when I start to ponder the merits of The Mighty Coo versus Niko's mate.

Glasgow team out at 12 noon.

Not sure about the Ulstermen.

Team announced.

15. Stuart Hogg

14. Tommy Seymour

13. Sean Lamont

12. Mark Bennett

11. DTH van der Merwe

10. Ruaridh Jackson

9. Henry Pyrgos (Captain)

 

1. Ryan Grant  

2. Pat MacArthur

3. Ed Kalman

4. Tim Swinson

5. Jonny Gray

6. Rob Harley

7. Tyrone Holmes

8. Josh Strauss

 

16. Dougie Hall

17. Gordon Reid

18. Moray Low

19. James Eddie  

20. Chris Fusaro

21. Richie Vernon

22. Chris Cusiter

23. Gabriel Ascarate

Great to see our Hogg, Grant & Strauss back.
Surprised at Pyrgos being made captain. Also interesting split of forwards / backs on the bench.

Strong team, though Pyrgos as captain is a bit left field. Great to see Gray get his first Pro12 start, and it'll be interesting to see Bennett at inside centre. He's played there for the u20s and looked good.

I'm very happy with this , though the state of cover st 10 is interesting - will Hoggy, Messiah or Archangel shift on when Rhubarb is inevitably crocked?

Good to see ickle Jonny given another shot - he might just be turning into something special.

Oh , and I'm obviously over the moon to have Bluto, Hoggy and Roddy back!

6/2 Split, maybe doubts over Strauss lasting the full 80 minutes and want the extra cover. With Eddie getting selected over Ryder, we could actually replace the whole back row!

Glad to see Hogg and Grant back.

From those who played games last weekend, four injured already. Shows how physical a game it these days.

New Fijian lock looks like some catching up to do. Looks like he's 6th choice at the moment!

Yes, that's a strong team all right - fittingly so, given the quality of the opposition. Two out of three Lions back is comforting to see and it's the two that we really needed for this game. DTH and Seymour on the wings is a strong running, talented pairing.
 
We'll see what Sherlock has got - I'm expecting good things from him. Fozzy is on the bench if needs be.
 
Well done to LittleJohn - would much rather have him start than Jedi if that's the alternative. Was hoping that Big Naka might get a bench place. Perhaps we're saving up all of our Pacific Islanders in order to Go All Fijian on Leinster's ass.

As always, this is an interesting list to see:

Not available due to injury:
Mike Cusack (shoulder), Alex Dunbar (thigh), Peter Horne (knee), Al Kellock (leg), Byron McGuigan (hip), Niko Matawalu (ankle), Tom Ryder (head), Duncan Weir (ankle) and Ryan Wilson (shoulder).

Bennett at 12 will be interesting, although I suspect we'll see Lamont used on the crash a few times.

Forwards/backs split not much of an issue with Vernon there - covers centre remember....

Pleased to see Hogg back in action. Pretty exciting back three.

Arguably, there's seven of the starting XV on that list of injured. It's crazy that we can still put out a team with such quality.

Ulster

FULL TEAM:
(15-9): J Payne, D McIlwaine, D Cave, L Marshall, M Allen, P Jackson, I Porter; (1-8): C Black, R Herring, D Fitzpatrick, J Muller (Captain), D Tuohy, R Wilson, S Doyle, N Williams; Replacements (16-23): N Annett, T Court, R Lutton, I Henderson, C Henry, P Marshall, J McKinney, R Andrew.

Have to say I'm a bit underwhelmed by that team. Trimble gone for 4 weeks is terrible. Unless we up it 110% I see a Glasgow win. Probably just an overreaction on my part but I'm I'm a glum mood.

Bloody good loose five for Ulster - crikey oh blimey!

I'm very underwhelmed by that team- Wilson at 6, mistake. Fitzpatrick promoted to starter despite Lutton being one of our best players last week. Andrew Trimble injured is just bad news and leaves us looking very week in the back three.

We need Gilroy and Bowe back asap, because Allen and McIlwaine carry very little threat on the wings. No doubt if we have two from three of Gilroy, Bowe and Trimble we have one of the best back threes in the league but with all three injured it's not looking too incisive.

The fact that it's all change in the backrow just goes to show how little last weeks selection did its job at the breakdown I suppose- can't be worse than that.

It's a big pressure game because losing at Ravenhill in any circumstances to any team is not acceptable. Nothing less than a win this week will do. But a lot of big hitters are still on the sidelines...

Christ the night. Not good.

Another injury. No Best, no Afoa, no Ferris, no Pienaar, no Wallace, no Olding, no Gilroy, no Bowe and now no Trimble. And I don't know why no Diack.

We really need these boys to step up. I tell you what though, Henry will have gotten the mesaage loud and clear - more expected of him.

I have to say, I am afeared.

Diack is just dropped, not rotated or injured. Just dropped.

Luke Marshall really has to show something in games like this if he wants to be considered for Ireland. These are the matches he has to shine in.

Big opportunity for Glasgow - that is a very strong team out and some question marks over the Ulster selection.

Why is Pyrgos captain????

On a lighter note, every time I see Ian Porters name I think of this;

https://youtu.be/jfectchNtQM?t=4m10s

RDW_Scotland wrote:Big opportunity for Glasgow - that is a very strong team out and some question marks over the Ulster selection.

Why is Pyrgos captain????

Henners was captain against  and I think is playing 40 with Cusiter (who will just take the captain's armband) getting on at the interval. I would have thought that it was Bluto who would be captain but I suspect Toonie is worried he won't last a full 80.
 
Seven personnel changes and two positional changes is a lot for Ulster (or any team) to make and to some extent that has to be unsettling for the side but I guess it shows how fecked off Anscombe was with his team after the last match. Huge opportunity for Glasgow to get some Ravenhill points at last, but that looks like a strong Ulster bench to me - potentially stronger than ours.

Although on the upside, we don't live in Syria and we've avoided Clownshoes Clancy refereeing two of our games in a row now.  

I don't necessarily mind dropping Henry (even though I wouldn't have) as Doyle is a useful player. To be honest I wouldn't have minded seeing if both could feature in an effort to counter our breakdown woes. Doyle is a very good carrier.

The wings are just meh to me. I don't mind Michael Allen in there but both Allen and McIlwaine is workmanlike at best

Diack dropped is strange to me.

Why is Pyrgos captain?

Continuing the painful metaphor (stretching it, really), Pyrgos is that recently divorced girl from the office, the slightly dumpy one, who you had a drink with after work one time (it was actually a team event, but everyone else left and you were stuck at the far end of the booth, unable to move), and before you know it, she’s moved in and she’s boxing up your vinyls. The next week you’re looking at carpet samples and visiting the home furnishings floor at John Lewis on Buchanan Street, though you shouldn’t worry - you won’t actually get to pick anything yourself, her sister the ‘interior designer’ will do that (I suppose that’s what you do with a history degree from Portsmouth), though if you ask me she left most of her wits on the floor of a nightclub in Magaluf.

I honestly don’t know what’s happening now. Where am I? Who are you people, and why are you looking at me?

IanBru wrote:Why is Pyrgos captain?

Continuing the painful metaphor (stretching it, really), Pyrgos is that recently divorced girl from the office, the slightly dumpy one, who you had a drink with after work one time (it was actually a team event, but everyone else left and you were stuck at the far end of the booth, unable to move), and before you know it, she’s moved in and she’s boxing up your vinyls. The next week you’re looking at carpet samples and visiting the home furnishings floor at John Lewis on Buchanan Street, though you shouldn’t worry - you won’t actually get to pick anything yourself, her sister the ‘interior designer’ will do that (I suppose that’s what you do with a history degree from Portsmouth), though if you ask me she left most of her wits on the floor of a nightclub in Magaluf.

I honestly don’t know what’s happening now. Where am I? Who are you people, and why are you looking at me?

 I'm organising an Intervention for Ian. We're worried now.

Standulstermen wrote:The wings are just meh to me. I don't mind Michael Allen in there but both Allen and McIlwaine is workmanlike at best

Diack dropped is strange to me.

There was some chat he didn't react well to the dressing down given to the squad after last week.

I can't wait until he decides to extend this metaphor to Nick Williams  

Well in that case notch then stuff him. I thought (in my 1 viewing) he was the best of a bad bunch in our backrow but I wasn't rewatching to revisit my opinion. Pus he adds to the lineout which was abysmal last week.

Our lineout looks somewhat limited with the backrow selection. I tell you what our 9-10-12 axis needs a serious game.

Notch wrote:

Standulstermen wrote:The wings are just meh to me. I don't mind Michael Allen in there but both Allen and McIlwaine is workmanlike at best

Diack dropped is strange to me.

There was some chat he didn't react well to the dressing down given to the squad after last week.

Makes sense to me, but it's pure conjecture, really.

If we lose this, are Ulster In Crisis?

He did a few good things but he and Chris Henry were Captain Invisible when it came to the ruck... so don't think Mark Anscombe was too happy about that considering the flankers have been completely changed. Just don't know whether Wilson can do that role either.

I think we'll see Chris Henry and Paul Marshall desperate to prove themselves coming off the bench, and Iain Henderson too- I think if we are ahead when they come on in the second half they'll give us the momentum to get over the line.

Standulstermen wrote:Well in that case notch then stuff him. I thought (in my 1 viewing) he was the best of a bad bunch in our backrow but I wasn't rewatching to revisit my opinion. Pus he adds to the lineout which was abysmal last week.

Our lineout looks somewhat limited with the backrow selection. I tell you what our 9-10-12 axis needs a serious game.

Totally agree that this is key, Stand. Jackson needs to pony up and kick for position well and Marshall needs to be less eager and stop forcing the low percentage passes like he seemed to do last week. It could have been worse. They could have been facing off against 9. Matawalu 10. Weir/Jackson 12. Dunbar/Horne.

It also could have been much better - we could have Pienaar in there.

Still, it is what it is.

Glasgow going down.

I think Ulster will react strongly at home to the Dragons defeat and win this one, although Glasgow should be good for a losing bonus point.

I was trying to find a Limmy or Rab C. video taking the mickey out of Glasgow, and instead found one where Ross Kemp meets a Glasgow man who pulled his own toes off.

Interesting.

Don Alfonso wrote:I was trying to find a Limmy or Rab C. video taking the mickey out of Glasgow, and instead found one where Ross Kemp meets a Glasgow man who pulled his own toes off.

Interesting.

Never mind YouTube, DA. Most posters just find articles like this (http://www.theguardian.com/society/2012/nov/06/mystery-glasgow-health-problems) and query how Glaswegians are able to get down to Scotstoun at all without having a heart attack on the way.

In fairness, it was in Stirling that I first encountered deep-fried pizzas.

Not many Grauniad writers swanning round the Raploch estate, though.

It's the tragic heroin abuse that keeps me thin...

IanBru wrote:It's the tragic heroin abuse that keeps me thin...

And stylish!

So are you Weegies reconciled to the fact you're going down or do we need to persuade you by repeatedly stating this fact?

Sorry, what was the question?

I wasn't paying attention. I was distracted by thinking about how much we're going down by.

George Carlin wrote:Sorry, what was the question?

I wasn't paying attention. I was distracted by thinking about how much we're going down by.

Fair answer- If I was a Glasgow fan I would be distracted by that too!








(Because it's a lot)

Going down faster than a cheap mexican hooer eh?

I think Ulster are up against it here. Glasgow won't have a better chance of taking them in RHill than this.

Ulster to come out fighting! SUFTUM!

Notch wrote:

So are you Weegies reconciled to the fact you're going down or do we need to persuade you by repeatedly stating this fact?

Going down faster than a fat lad chasing a wheel of cheese down a hill.  

Going down faster than the next girl IanBru uses as a metaphor to describe a Glasgow player.

On a more serious note, it's a year on Sunday since we lost Nevin Spence.

http://www.u.tv/sport/Nevin-Spence-remembered-at-weekend-clash/9499679d-d706-4680-81ee-192d3940b766

I can't believe it was a year ago already.

Notch wrote:On a more serious note, it's a year on Sunday since we lost Nevin Spence.

http://www.u.tv/sport/Nevin-Spence-remembered-at-weekend-clash/9499679d-d706-4680-81ee-192d3940b766

A desperately sad day - suspect there will be some extra motivation from Ulster tonight. 

Yeah, a year on and it still puts things in perspective. I'm not a fan of the overuse of silences, but I think something should be done tonight to mark the event at Ravenhill

On to far happier matters, are people excited for tonight? This has all the makings of a cracker - the best match of the week, potentially.