Coming soon. The Culture Cup

First topic message reminder :

No, the Culture Cup isn't a really poor Boy George tribute act, it is the next installment of the v2 voting competitions.  We have had music, TV and film, and now comes a bit of a mixture with some books thrown in for good measure.  

It will follow the usual format of a category being put up, the contestants PM'ing me their choices and then a poll being set up for the wider 606v2 community to vote for their favourites.  It will hopefully contain 3 x TV, 3 x Music, 3 x Film, 3 x Books and maybe a bonus round.

Adam has already got second place tied up as he is a perennial runner up in real life and on 606v2, but the winners spot is up for grabs.  The prizes are excellent.  The winner becomes undisputedly the most cultured poster across the whole internet, they get my respect and most importantly, they get 3% of all the advertising revenue that Adam coins in from the site.  That is 3% of a lot of money.  Not to be sniffed at.

Places are limited, so if you're interested in showing off what a culture vulture you are, then please let me know on this thread.  Unless you are Adam, Jeff, Union, Galted, The Womble, compelling and rich or Dolphin in which case, you crazy kids are already entered.

Good luck.

Edit:

Here are the first two questions.  Starting off with a couple of easy ones to get things up and running.

1) Best book ever.  Quite simple really, what is the best book you have ever read?  For those of you too dim to read, just make one up.  If you're desperate to win then go for something popular.  Alternatively, be true to yourself and pick your own favourite.

2) Greatest song never to reach the top 5 in the UK charts in the year of their release.  Quite an open field, but we will be narrowing things down the further on we go.  Thought about having songs that had never made the top 10 but decided that was too difficult.

Please PM me a couple of choices for each question in case you don't get your first pick.  I will PM you if you don't get your first choice.  If you don't hear from me, assume you got it.

Please can you send answers by the end of play Friday.  When the poll is up, you can vote for yourself because I don't know how to ban it happening.  If you can live with the self-loathing, then knock yourself out.

Good luck.

That would depend on how I do in the early stages of The Culture Club so, on the off-chance I get a point at some stage, it would extend to people who could ban me.

Galted wrote:That would depend on how I do in the early stages of The Culture Club....

Galted, do you really want to hurt me?

 

Did I seriously type that or did you use some form of moderator artfulness?

Beard is off, I am bare faced and ready to get cultural.

Splitter, mine is looking spectacular. Tidied it up a bit last night but is still as thick and lustrous as previously.

I'm currently translating The Iliad into Old Norse for a bit of a laugh until the cup starts.

As Harry Enfield once put it, "sophistication, I've been to Leeds."

Every time I try to cultivate a beard my neck gets terribly itchy, but then if I shave the neck and leave the rest it looks like I'm growing it on purpose, which I can't quite carry off due to the ginger and white bits and the gaps, so I then have to go for a goatee which I can't quite join up properly, so the whole thing then comes off.

Not sure why I felt the urge to share that, but until the Cup starts there is not a lot else to do.

I am a fairly hirsute individual so it pretty much grows quickly. Within two weeks of starting I tend to have something fairly recognisable as a beard. Tend to just let it be scruffy for a week and then tidy up under the neck and cheeks and I’m good to go. Have had the current one about 4 weeks now and is well past being itchy or annoying.

Rowley wrote:As Harry Enfield once put it, "sophistication, I've been to Leeds."

That's from Blackadder, not Harry Enfield

Beginning to get worried about Tino, I fear he may have crumbled under the pressure having realised the magnitude of what he has taken on.

It isn't. Is from a Harry Enfield sketch where he plays a character called George Whitebread. He is doing an advertising pitch and someone says his campaign lacks sophistication, which prompts that response.

Union Cane wrote:Beginning to get worried about Tino, I fear he may have crumbled under the pressure having realised the magnitude of what he has taken on.

Is now he is best friends with Wlad and Bond. Has no time for the little folk anymore.

Bloody hell yes of course, what am I thinking? D'oh!
I can picture the Blackadder scene in my head - the episode with Miranda Richardson as the highwaywoman, when Blackadder is talking to her dad. Wonder what the line is I'm thinking of?
I'm going mad. I need a cup of culture.

Rowley wrote:

Union Cane wrote:Beginning to get worried about Tino, I fear he may have crumbled under the pressure having realised the magnitude of what he has taken on.

Is now he is best friends with Wlad and Bond. Has no time for the little folk anymore.

You lot are like a pack of cultural hyenas.

I am just ball breakingly busy for a change. Poor timing, I appreciate that, but I will send out the first two questions as soon as I can.

I resent being called a "cultural hyena", I'm more of a cultural fossa (cryptoprocta feroxor) or a cultural large-spotted genet (genetta tigrina) though to opponents I must seem like a  cultural killer whale (orcinus orca).

JuliusHMarx wrote:I can picture the Blackadder scene in my head - the episode with Miranda Richardson as the highwaywoman, when Blackadder is talking to her dad. Wonder what the line is I'm thinking of?

One of these... http://www.suslik.org/Humour/FilmOrTV/BlackAdder/ba3-5.html

Rowley wrote:It isn't. Is from a Harry Enfield sketch where he plays a character called George Whitebread. He is doing an advertising pitch and someone says his campaign lacks sophistication, which prompts that response.

"I've got two words for you 'Sh!te!' and 'Sh!te!'"
"I like what I know and I know what I bloody well like!"

Union Cane wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:I can picture the Blackadder scene in my head - the episode with Miranda Richardson as the highwaywoman, when Blackadder is talking to her dad. Wonder what the line is I'm thinking of?

One of these... http://www.suslik.org/Humour/FilmOrTV/BlackAdder/ba3-5.html

Hmm, not really similar to the other line - clearly dotage has addled my brain.

An orca nearly killed me once. Actually, three times. I hate that orca.

Shouldn't have been trying to shag its blow-hole then, should you?

I've made that mistake as well, it shouldn't really be called a "blow-hole".

It nearly ate me.

Galted wrote:I'm currently translating The Iliad into Old Norse for a bit of a laugh until the cup starts.

I'm too lazy for that. Would just stick with beowolf in the original language and make do.

My wife can still read Beowulf in Saxon. I am not kidding.

I've spent the day punting in the River Cam, reciting Richard III to a small group of mice and men. Where the blooming heck is that Tino?!

I've spent all day eating the grapes of wrath

I spent all day deleting Peter Kay jokes and videos on the Internet. Pretty sure you can't contribute more to Culture than that

I spent all day listening to Moby and playing with my Dick.

#cultureboy

I've been listening to Culture Beat.

Collie Miss Terader, Collie Miss Terong, Colin Insane...

....................................

Right, you cultural monkeys.

Please see the edit in the OP.

nominations sent.

Expect to come second in week 1!

I got my noms in almost immediately. I expect zero points for both.

Adam D wrote:

Expect to come second

Bet Mrs Adam wishes you would as well.

Pretty much guarantee nil points for my noms.

Saying that, I don't even really know how this game works so I was never hopeful of much!!

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Adam D wrote:

Expect to come second

Bet Mrs Adam wishes you would as well.

Given your sprogging voracity I bet Mrs Tino wishes you wouldn't at all!

Ive had to go mainstream from the start, unless someone has pipped me to my favourite book.

TopHat24/7 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Adam D wrote:

Expect to come second

Bet Mrs Adam wishes you would as well.

Given your sprogging voracity I bet Mrs Tino wishes you wouldn't at all!

That's assuming they are all mine, TopHat.

I have my suspicions about the one with an afro but I love him like my own.

Dolphin Ziggler wrote:Ive had to go mainstream from the start, unless someone has pipped me to my favourite book.

did you pick 50 shades as well?

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

TopHat24/7 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Adam D wrote:

Expect to come second

Bet Mrs Adam wishes you would as well.

Given your sprogging voracity I bet Mrs Tino wishes you wouldn't at all!

That's assuming they are all mine, TopHat.

I have my suspicions about the one with an afro but I love him like my own.

Ah dear little Yung Chen Su....lovely kid!

I once worked with an old chap in a factory who blamed his alcoholism on witnessing his wife give birth to a 'brown' baby (he wasn't brown).

seanmichaels wrote:I once worked with an old chap in a factory who blamed his alcoholism on witnessing his wife give birth to a 'brown' baby (he wasn't brown).

Are you brown?

Union Cane wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:I once worked with an old chap in a factory who blamed his alcoholism on witnessing his wife give birth to a 'brown' baby (he wasn't brown).

Are you brown?

No, off white. Brown isn't politically incorrect is it?

I think it is ok in the circumstances.

I just wondered whether you had slipped one to the old chap's wife, that is all.

Union Cane wrote:

I just wondered whether you had slipped one to the old chap's wife, that is all.

If she is a minor celebrity then there is a good chance he did.

Is Helen Mirren minor or major?

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Union Cane wrote:

I just wondered whether you had slipped one to the old chap's wife, that is all.

If she is a minor celebrity then there is a good chance he did.

And you'd probably be living round the corner from her....

TopHat24/7 wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Union Cane wrote:

I just wondered whether you had slipped one to the old chap's wife, that is all.

If she is a minor celebrity then there is a good chance he did.

And you'd probably be living round the corner from her....

Daniel Craig is not a minor celebrity. How very dare you.