The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by Alistair Wed 27 Apr 2016, 2:43 pm

First topic message reminder :

Great idea, Rick. Like windscreen wipers on a duck's butt.

by Rowley Tue 24 May 2016, 12:17 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:Great fact Tino, and well fleshed out with relevant detail that added to the information as a whole.

Thanks riCK. I won't sacrifice my arthropod principles. If a fact needs to be fleshed out, then fleshed out it will be.

And thanks, Serial. A touching sentiment that only you could deliver with authenticity.

A wise stance Tina. Never court populism. I do it occasionally on the boxing board. I always feel a little cheaper for doing so.

by **JuliusHMarx** Tue 24 May 2016, 12:39 pm

Is this what the culture cup has been reduced to
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love-in

by Rowley Tue 24 May 2016, 12:41 pm

Is shah's absence. His constant insults and bile provide the balance the place needs.

by **superflyweight** Tue 24 May 2016, 12:48 pm

Happy to do my bit to save the CC and to retain its original spirit.

You can all get away to f*ck.

by Guest Tue 24 May 2016, 1:01 pm

I, for one, think it's a welcome change but let me make it clear that I couldn't cope with it for too long.

C*NTS!!!

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 24 May 2016, 1:22 pm

Orcas may live for 70 years or more. Bottlenose dolphins can live for at least forty years. Dolphins that are kept in captivity die much earlier than those living in the wild.

The blue whale is the largest animal ever to have lived on Earth; it is larger than any of the dinosaurs. The biggest recorded blue whale was a female in the Antarctic Ocean that was 30.5 m long (more than 3.5 times the length of a double-decker bus and as long as a Boeing 737 plane) with an estimated weight of 144 tonnes (almost the same as 2,000 men). The tongue alone of a blue whale can weigh as much as an elephant and an entire football team could stand on it!

The heart of a blue whale is about the size of a VW Beetle car and weighs up to 450 kg's. The aorta, a major blood vessel for the heart, is big enough for a human child to crawl through.

Blue whales are pregnant for 10-12 months. The newborn calf is about 7.5 m long and weighs about 5.5 – 7.3 tonnes. A baby blue whale drinks about 225 litres (about enough to fill a bath) of its mother’s fat-laden milk (it is 40-50% fat) a day, gaining 3.7 kilograms an hour, until at age 8 months they are 15 m long and 22.5 tonnes! The mother and calf may stay together for a year or longer, until the calf is about 13 m long. Blue whales reach maturity at 10-15 years.

A Cuvier's beaked whale has been recorded to dive to a depth of 3km for over 2 hours.

Sperm whales are also champion divers. Adults can stay underwater for almost two hours and dive to depths of 2,000 metres or more. They eat squid, which can live very deep in the ocean, so sperm whales have to dive down into the deepest parts of the sea to catch them.

The sperm whale’s huge head, which is up to a third of its overall body length, houses the heaviest brain in the animal kingdom - up to 9kg. The head also consists of a cavity large enough to park a car inside that contains a yellowish wax called spermaceti that was much sought after by whalers.

The bowhead whale, which lives exclusively in the Arctic, has the thickest blubber of all whales. It can reach a whopping 70cm in thickness. These whales also have the longest baleen – the comb-like structures hanging down from their upper jaws used as a sieve to filter food from the sea-water. These baleen plates can reach up to 5 metres in length.

The male narwhal has two teeth. The left one pierces the animal’s lip and grows to an incredible 2-3 metres. In Europe, these tusks were once sold as the horns of the mythical unicorn.

In the wild whales live for a long time - generally the larger species living longest. Bowhead whales spend their lives in cold Arctic waters. They may be the world’s oldest mammals and are the longest lived of all whales – possibly over 200 years

Beluga whales are known as the "canaries of the sea" because they make chirping sounds like the little yellow birds.

Blue whales are the loudest creatures on Earth! Their call reaches levels up to 188 decibels and can be heard hundreds of miles away. The blue whale is louder than a jet, which reaches only 140 decibels. Sounds over 120-130 decibels are painful to human ears.

Male humpback whales sing the most complex songs and have long, varied, eerie, and beautiful songs that include recognizable sequences of squeaks, grunts, and other sounds. The songs have the largest range of frequencies used by whales, ranging from 20-9,000 hertz. Only male humpback whales have been recorded singing. They sing these complex songs only in warm waters where they breed and give birth. In cold waters, they make rougher sounds, scrapes and groans, perhaps used for locating large masses of krill (the tiny crustaceans that they eat).

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 24 May 2016, 1:32 pm

That's how you put in some effort you ball lacking southerner. Well done rick. Copy and paste is king

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 24 May 2016, 1:37 pm

Club toastie, 7.10

by Guest Tue 24 May 2016, 1:40 pm

dagless, what the f*ck is that all about? Try this for size.

Even in death, Jeffrey Dahmer was so feared that during his autopsy, his corpse was handcuffed to the mortuary table.

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 24 May 2016, 1:44 pm

What in the name of F**K has Dahmer's autopsy got to do with a club toastie?

Was he trying to steal the doctors? And that's why he was handcuffed!

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 24 May 2016, 1:49 pm

rick_dagless wrote:
The aorta, a major blood vessel for the heart, is big enough for a human child to crawl through.

I have heard this before but the version I heard was that a man could swim through it. I suspect your version is more accurate.

Great post riCK.

by Guest Tue 24 May 2016, 1:53 pm

rick_dagless wrote:What in the name of F**K has Dahmer's autopsy got to do with a club toastie?

Was he trying to steal the doctors? And that's why he was handcuffed!

I can cope with Tina's insect/bug facts (they're wonderful Tina, keep up the good work) but now I'm expected to start paying attention to the inner workings of sea creatures?!?!? Christ on a bike (sorry Shah) we've got Rowley and his f*cking ~~jazz~~j*zz, Shah and his ~~YouTube videos~~IS training videos and now this! If that's how we're rolling I'll chuck in the occasional serial killer factoid so the place goes to Hell in a handcart

by **ShahenshahG** Tue 24 May 2016, 1:53 pm

Khichdi with added butter 9/10

by **rIck_dAgless** Tue 24 May 2016, 1:56 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:What in the name of F**K has Dahmer's autopsy got to do with a club toastie?

Was he trying to steal the doctors? And that's why he was handcuffed!
I can cope with Tina's insect/bug facts (they're wonderful Tina, keep up the good work) but now I'm expected to start paying attention to the inner workings of sea creatures?!?!? Christ on a bike (sorry Shah) we've got Rowley and his f*cking ~~jazz~~j*zz, Shah and his ~~YouTube videos~~IS training videos and now this! If that's how we're rolling I'll chuck in the occasional serial killer factoid so the place goes to Hell in a handcart

Makes sense now DAVE, as you are.

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 24 May 2016, 4:40 pm

Mother of all DaGLEssing.

I have been doing some graduate recruitment thing. A whole load of the poor saps vying for one position.

One of them used the word 'vernacular'. What a c*nt. His card is marked already.

There was a very beautiful Chinese lady. She is the front runner at the moment. Educated over here. Very lovely young lady.

by Guest Tue 24 May 2016, 4:47 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Mother of all DaGLEssing.

I have been doing some graduate recruitment thing. A whole load of the poor saps vying for one position.

One of them used the word 'vernacular'. What a c*nt. His card is marked already.

There was a very beautiful Chinese lady. She is the front runner at the moment. Educated over here. Very lovely young lady.

To use the vernacular.
I hope one of them tries to shoehorn in a bug related analogy and you beat the living sh!t out of them

by Mind the windows Tino. Tue 24 May 2016, 4:55 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Mother of all DaGLEssing.

I have been doing some graduate recruitment thing. A whole load of the poor saps vying for one position.

One of them used the word 'vernacular'. What a c*nt. His card is marked already.

There was a very beautiful Chinese lady. She is the front runner at the moment. Educated over here. Very lovely young lady.
To use the vernacular.
I hope one of them tries to shoehorn in a bug related analogy and you beat the living sh!t out of them

If they get the analogy accurate then I will be ok with it. If they get it wrong, then I am sub-contracting the beating out to you.

by Guest Tue 24 May 2016, 5:51 pm

What if it's the beautiful Chinese Lady? If I beat her up, won't I just want to do it again in a couple of hours?

by Rowley Wed 25 May 2016, 6:28 am

https://youtu.be/jDULlMa8Hxc

Morning one and all.

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 25 May 2016, 8:04 am

Good morning.

Arthropods employ a variety of reproductive methods. All terrestrial arthropods undergo internal fertilization and sperm is usually transferred to the female indirectly. Aquatic arthropods vary in their reproductive methods, with some species using internal fertilization and others external fertilization. Most arthropods lay eggs. Scorpions are the exception to this rule, they incubate their eggs internally and give birth to live young.

And millipedes have sex legs.

by **JuliusHMarx** Wed 25 May 2016, 9:08 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Good morning.

Arthropods employ a variety of reproductive methods. All terrestrial arthropods undergo internal fertilization and sperm
.

Nice work Tino.

And good to hear your recruiting graduates based on their looks. It's the way forward.

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 25 May 2016, 9:09 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:Good morning.

Arthropods employ a variety of reproductive methods. All terrestrial arthropods undergo internal fertilization and sperm
.

Nice work Tino.

And good to hear your recruiting graduates based on their looks. It's the way forward.

Shame.

by **Galted** Wed 25 May 2016, 9:09 am

Morning all

The following have been known to kill arthropods: chameleons, old ladies, swifts, kittens and toads.

by **JuliusHMarx** Wed 25 May 2016, 9:14 am

Galted wrote:Morning all

The following have been known to kill arthropods: chameleons, old ladies, swifts, kittens and toads and Jules.

by Guest Wed 25 May 2016, 11:57 am

JuliusHMarx wrote:
Galted wrote:Morning all

The following have been known to kill arthropods: chameleons, old ladies, swifts, kittens, toads, Jules and small children with hammers and a nasty streak.

by **superflyweight** Wed 25 May 2016, 12:22 pm

Afternoon all.

The following have been known to kill the Culture Cup: posts about athropods, anything posted by sean, Adam

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 25 May 2016, 12:40 pm

The following have been known to kill the Culture Cup: tedious anecdotes about playing chess with the drummer from Crowded House and/or stories about being tossed off by the midget wife of one of The Proclaimers

by **superflyweight** Wed 25 May 2016, 12:44 pm

She's a dwarf and I reckon I could have had full sex if I wanted.

by Adam D Wed 25 May 2016, 12:46 pm

Jeffrey Dahmer used to kill insects.

Just trying to bring the discussion back on topic.

Afternoon, bumders.

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 25 May 2016, 12:46 pm

superflyweight wrote:She's a dwarf

What's the difference?

by **superflyweight** Wed 25 May 2016, 12:51 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:She's a dwarf

What's the difference?

A dwarf has disproportionately short arms and legs. It's caused by a hormone deficiency. A midget is still a dwarf, but their arms and legs are in proportion. An elf is a supernatural being. Sometimes they're invisible, like fairies.

It's called an education.

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 25 May 2016, 1:02 pm

superflyweight wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:She's a dwarf

What's the difference?

A dwarf has disproportionately short arms and legs. It's caused by a hormone deficiency. A midget is still a dwarf, but their arms and legs are in proportion. An elf is a supernatural being*. Sometimes they're invisible, like fairies.

It's called an education.

*and the inspiration behind tino's dress sense

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 25 May 2016, 1:11 pm

ShahenshahG wrote:
superflyweight wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:She's a dwarf

What's the difference?

A dwarf has disproportionately short arms and legs. It's caused by a hormone deficiency. A midget is still a dwarf, but their arms and legs are in proportion. An elf is a supernatural being*. Sometimes they're invisible, like fairies.

It's called an education.

*and the inspiration behind tino's dress sense

It's better than dressing like Obi Wan Kenobi.

by Guest Wed 25 May 2016, 1:12 pm

ShahenshahG wrote:
superflyweight wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:She's a dwarf

What's the difference?

A dwarf has disproportionately short arms and legs. It's caused by a hormone deficiency. A midget is still a dwarf, but their arms and legs are in proportion. An elf is a supernatural being*. Sometimes they're invisible, like fairies.

It's called an education.

*and the inspiration behind tino's dress sense

Slightly less scary than your backpack/trigger ensemble, Shah.

It's not a backpack officer it's a special kind of baby carrier

by **superflyweight** Wed 25 May 2016, 1:13 pm

Sean dresses like Obi Wankyerknoboff

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 25 May 2016, 2:41 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
ShahenshahG wrote:
superflyweight wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
superflyweight wrote:She's a dwarf

What's the difference?

A dwarf has disproportionately short arms and legs. It's caused by a hormone deficiency. A midget is still a dwarf, but their arms and legs are in proportion. An elf is a supernatural being*. Sometimes they're invisible, like fairies.

It's called an education.

*and the inspiration behind tino's dress sense

It's better than dressing like Obi Wan Kenobi.

At least I didn't cut my nob off so I could get employed as a mannequin at my local 'next' store.

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 25 May 2016, 2:50 pm

You need some sleep.

by Guest Wed 25 May 2016, 2:59 pm

I have a lovely sleeping knife...works a treat!

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 25 May 2016, 3:04 pm

DAVE667 wrote:I have a lovely sleeping knife...works a treat!

So that's how tino put his nob to bed.

by Guest Wed 25 May 2016, 3:40 pm

Mrs Windows probably nagged it to death. At some stage most wives seem to get the urge to nag their husband's genitals into submission/redundancy

by **seanmichaels** Wed 25 May 2016, 10:49 pm

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Jl5vi9ir49g

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