The Dew Drop Inn Virtual Millennium Stadium Rugby Pub

First topic message reminder :

Welcome to the Virtual Rugby Pub - a place where you can come in for a sly beverage and discuss whatever's on your mind, or just eavesdrop on the regulars if you fancy a break from all the rugby chat. The pub has teleported itself inside Millenium Stadium this week to see if the men in red can manage a Slam. There's also TVs showing the other 6N matches, the U20s and Womens' matches, Super XV, the "Classic" match and LV= Cup action.

The only rule in this pub is one of mutual respect for everyone in it, oh and no defacing the pictures of Mervyn Davies and Jock Hobbs above the bar!




Old Pub: https://www.606v2.com/t25452-the-dew-drop-inn-virtual-rugby-pub

You're not bringing things down at all stag. These are very real problems that people face and it always helps to know that there is a non judgmental ear

Jeez Staggie that's awful I think most regs are pretty good at talking when they need to, either privately or in here, but I also second your post. There's always someone willing to lend an ear if people need it, they only need to say.

I suffer from the male syndrome of when someone tells me their problem, my mind goes into overdrive about how it can be fixed. Which is not helpful, because many problems don’t have a fix, and the cathartic nature of discussing the problem is then lost because I can’t just listen. It’s something I really need to work on about myself.

Yea, Im just flabbergasted by it. Its tough on my Dad - its one of his best pals who ironically helped him through his depression last year and on top of that he has to head the investigation in his role as a detective.

Fair play Stag. Takes a lot to post that.

It's not even about just being open to speak to about problems but being open to them for anything showing them love and care.

Agree Munsty. Honestly up until last year I thought depression was a bit of an wishy-washy thing. Its not.

As you say prevention is the best way to deal with it.

I have experience of that in my family, Stag. Tragic when people feel they have no other way out.

Well I just want to say that you lot in here are all good sorts and Im glad to say I know you. Including the Dragons fans. Excluding Munsty.

Yeah my views used to be a lot harsher but its going to the root of it and how it can be prevented then instead of reactive only when the problem is getting really bad.

red_stag wrote:Well I just want to say that you lot in here are all good sorts and Im glad to say I know you. Including the Dragons fans. Excluding Munsty.

Munsty's not a dragon fan

Drink is a big contributory factor I'm afraid.

I'm more than good sorts? Cheers Stag!

Glas,

Is it a reason, contributory factor or symptom?

It's not a cause. Plenty of people get smashed all the time and only face physical harm. However if there is another cause drink exacerbates it. For example, if there is financial stress, hitting the bottle makes it worse which leads to a downward spiral. If you are down and lacking in self confidence or are too self critical, dealing with thoughts of 'Poopie what did I get up to last night' don't help. The most important thing to remember is that depression is a symptom not a disease. It is the body's coping mechanism working against itself. Add alcohol and it just gets much worse.

Ah Munsty your the best.

That's the key Munsty. You still need the support early on rather than too late.

I had a dark period last year, sought help and actually had 3 consultations over a few months. The first was difficult, the last two got easier. I've always felt very strong and in control of my life but when you suffer a big loss - it can really affect you. Luckily I have good friends and family... plus you guys and gals on here.

Ironically, my Dad never had these sorts of things - he had an amazing life though and was an incredibly strong character but also a kind, loving father at the same time. He went from child to man... no teenage years as we know it. He saw horrible things and survived another 66 years after that. He told me that he often had some very vivid dreams about the war. Unfortunately, he was not covered by the Australian Government... nor the country for which he fought. He never complained and I don't think I ever saw him worried or depressed but he was of the old school where you just kept going... and going... and did as much as you could do for your family first. My Kiwi Mum was the best thing for him!

It's 6 months today actually.... time flies. I feel better able to cope with it each day and I'll always appreciate the kind and generous words from Gibbo, Rava, Kenny, Swanny, Kiwi and Fists, etc.

I'm glad you remember him so well Line. Sounds like he had a fantastic effect on you.

Interesting you mentioning about him having no teenage years. Someone said to me recently, the acceptance of adolescence is one of the problems in society as it has moved from not being anything 50 years ago to nowadays stretching well into people's twenties meaning they accept no real responsibility.

Glas,

I'd agree with you, just trying to clarify your point.

Breaker


Depression is something that's been a big part of my life since I was 16, tough to deal with, but being open about it is a big big help. Having a good support system in friends and family makes such a big difference.

And a bit of a change in topic, but I've just seen the Scarlets team for tomorrow - LOVE it!

A big thing is people relying on things that are obviously going to let them down and don't care about them or want good for them.

You're close to the Buddhist idea of attachment there, Munsty.

And Breaker:

MBTGOG wrote: Someone said to me recently, the acceptance of adolescence is one of the problems in society as it has moved from not being anything 50 years ago to nowadays stretching well into people's twenties meaning they accept no real responsibility.

This is very interesting. I had this conversation with someone not so long ago.

I would agree with the sentiment. I think for a lot of people being a "teenager" seems to last until they are about 24.

Luckless,

True, but they advise no attachment, I'm advising be careful who or what you get attached to.

Stag,

I think its starting to go later than that age. Accepting responsibility isn't just getting a job but much more.

Very lucky breaker.

MBTGOG wrote:Stag,

I think its starting to go later than that age. Accepting responsibility isn't just getting a job but much more.

Yes I know. Me and Maoliosa met up with an old school pal (who is actually 25) about two weeks ago.

He was amazed to hear that I was moving in with my girlfriend, Maoliosa was taking a mortgage and we both had full time jobs. He said he was "enjoying life while he was still young"

I would say that I very much don't accept responsibility all that much, am starting too, but I very much resent it, so guess in that aspect I am still stuck in the "adolescent" stage. Hmm.


Breaker - that's almost beyond lucky!

I had a delayed adolescence - I didn't start acting irresponsibly until I was about 20, then I wasted a good five years doing so.

I think its resented as people make you fear it whereas it is something that is part of maturing and should be embraced.

actually you know Lucky that seems to be the way I went about it too.....



Oooo club rugby back tonight. I have missed it.

And a derby game for your lot tomorrow, Dreamer!

red_stag wrote:

MBTGOG wrote: Someone said to me recently, the acceptance of adolescence is one of the problems in society as it has moved from not being anything 50 years ago to nowadays stretching well into people's twenties meaning they accept no real responsibility.

This is very interesting. I had this conversation with someone not so long ago.

I would agree with the sentiment. I think for a lot of people being a "teenager" seems to last until they are about 24.

Or in my case until I was 30.

I missed so much as a teenager and young adult as i spent most of my time working and going to Uni. I think thats why i acted out in my late 20's early 30's

Proposal for pictures above the bar in the new pub

SLAM-DUNK

PLAYER OF THE TOURNAMENT

Am starting to get a bit nervous about it. I think the Scarlets should win (and I don't like thinking that, over the past few seasons I've very rarely/never had that feeling, I'm not used to it!), but I will say, whoever loses it, I think it's good bye to their play off spot.

I really hope it's not the Scarlets.

I'd prefer the Scarlets to win, Dreamer. I don't actively dislike the Blues, but there's little to like about them other than the fact that they're Welsh.

Should write a book about it - you won't believe how he ended up in Australia and what happened when he arrived. Beyond belief... but he just accepted it.

Don't worry too much dreamer... it's a different world today. Sure, lots of horrible violence still but you are in a beautiful civilised part of the world. (the little day to day annoyances are just that.... just be aware of the big picture and look after yourself)

Enjoy your family and rugby... shopping and animals (or whatever takes your fancy); and don't worry too much about anything.
Be happy and grateful and kind to others (it's easy) and things will fall into place and you'll suddenly realise you ARE a very responsible person (and others will see that instantly - like I already do) and new opportunities will be everywhere.

Then all you have to do is continue to follow your developing instincts, like we all have to do - and enjoy life even more. It's actually easier to do that than have a bug-bear about something and feel intimidated by perceived worries. They are all mostly in our mind.

We are free!

Ballcocks i'll be in a blydi ball in Pembrokeshire when that games on! Argh!

Glas a du wrote:Ballcocks i'll be in a blydi ball in Pembrokeshire when that games on! Argh!

Where to by are you going to, like, init ?

top post Breaker


Glas - ti eisiau text updates? (now I've a phone that works!)

Write it LB

Great post by the way, agree with everything you said

PenfroPete wrote:Proposal for pictures above the bar in the new pub

SLAM-DUNK

PLAYER OF THE TOURNAMENT

Noted. And a new pub location (we do need to move countries, there's been complaints about the noise )

PenfroPete wrote:Proposal for pictures above the bar in the new pub

SLAM-DUNK

PLAYER OF THE TOURNAMENT

Yes to the Slam, but no to Dan Lydiate - nothing personal, simply we scoffed at Masi's award last year and I can't take Lydiate's any more seriously

Honk Kong!

for the 7's see

Seeing as the first qualifying match for the next World Cup is being played in Mexico, why don't we go there? The food's pretty good, unless you believe Jeremy Clarkson and his gaggle of sycophants.

PenfroPete wrote:

Glas a du wrote:Ballcocks i'll be in a blydi ball in Pembrokeshire when that games on! Argh!

Where to by are you going to, like, init ?

Cleddau Wotsit Hotel, somewhere.

that's a good shout actually Lucky, aye, let's go to Mexico.

rugbydreamer wrote:top post Breaker


Glas - ti eisiau text updates? (now I've a phone that works!)

fe fyddai hynny yn anhygoel, diolch.

MBTGOG wrote:
Interesting you mentioning about him having no teenage years. Someone said to me recently, the acceptance of adolescence is one of the problems in society as it has moved from not being anything 50 years ago to nowadays stretching well into people's twenties meaning they accept no real responsibility.

44 years old, no intention of getting beyond adolescent any time soon

rugbydreamer wrote:SA AND NZ?

Ouch. Tough tough group for us there.


Billy - just seen your post. My wine was lovely ta v much, got some left over for tonight too, although quite tempted to pop to a pub beer garden after work, tis such a nice day

Get yourself down to The Cayo Arms or y Mochyn Du dreamer.

AsLongAsBut100ofUs wrote:

MBTGOG wrote:
Interesting you mentioning about him having no teenage years. Someone said to me recently, the acceptance of adolescence is one of the problems in society as it has moved from not being anything 50 years ago to nowadays stretching well into people's twenties meaning they accept no real responsibility.

44 years old, no intention of getting beyond adolescent any time soon

Ah Asbo your no adolescent. Your a 44 year old man with an infectiously good natured personality.

going to Y Mochyn tomorrow Hound, so looking like it could be The Cayo (tis where I first tried Cwrw Haf actually)

Glas - dim probs

Oh and Mick had a superb conversation with a junkie in Dublin yesterday.

Wanders over ciggie behind one ear reeking of booze and says in a polite but very slurred voice.

"Cmere bud, Im homeless and I was wondering if you could spare any . . .whatyacallit . . .y'know (rubs his fingers together indicating he wants cash) . . . .phook it never mind cant remember the word for it ill catch ya later"