Complete the sentence

First topic message reminder :

This is a game where you complete the sentence of the previous post and start off a new sentence for the next poster to complete.

Its not to make a story, just a load of random sentences.

To start you off:

The fridge door wouldnt open so I............

he was eating on, resulting in..........him swallowing his spoon.

As he reddened & choked I took the opportunity to.........

As he reddened & choked I took the opportunity to......... dive through an open window and rolled onto the dusty ground outside.

The Colonel's jeep screeched to a halt just missing my.......

The Colonel's jeep screeched to a halt just missing my......left bollock

That was to close for my liking , so i ............................

That was to close for my liking , so i .................. went back into the Mess Hall.

Everyone had left by now except for a few...................

Everyone had left by now except for a few.......the female recruits .

A wandered over and said " .......................

A wandered over and said " ......you're new here, haven't seen you here before"

"Do you want to come back to my barracks for a bit of................

"Do you want to come back to my barracks for a bit of..........arm to arm combat ?"

They all laughed but said yes , so we ..........................

They all laughed but said yes , so we ............ headed off.

"OK, try and come at me with your best shot" she said, so I..............

"OK, try and come at me with your best shot" she said, so I........ran at her

She side stepped sending tumbling into .....................

She side stepped sending tumbling into ......... a vaulting horse... end on.

"C'mon... have another go then" so this time........

"C'mon... have another go then" so this time........i took it slowly

I circled her , looking for the right time to pounce . But ......................

I circled her , looking for the right time to pounce . But ........ she reached out and threw me over her shoulder.

I landed with a thud on the mats. She then offered her hand so I......

I landed with a thud on the mats. She then offered her hand so I.....pulled her towards me

We kissed , and sparks flew ...............................

We kissed , and sparks flew ..............................., I stuck my tongue down her earhole & she...................

I stuck my tongue down her earhole & she........... yelped with pleasure.

Then she grabbed my................

Then she grabbed my.....Rifle

"Give me your wallet !"she said , with that i shot my load all over ...............

"Give me your wallet !"she said , with that i shot my load all over ........ the mattress.

"I'll leave you to clean up your mess" she said as she left with my wallet which contained about................

"I'll leave you to clean up your mess" she said as she left with my wallet which contained about.........4 Grand in cash

I then decided that the Army life wasn't for me , so i nicked a jeep and fled the base .......................

I then decided that the Army life wasn't for me , so i nicked a jeep and fled the base .......... in the direction of Las Vegas.

On arrival at a small hotel on the outskirts, I realised that I had no...................

On arrival at a small hotel on the outskirts, I realised that I had no..........money on me .

So i decided to rob the shop next door ........................

So i decided to rob the shop next door ............ which seemed unoccupied when I burst in.

However, as I leaned over the counter and reached out to the cash register.....

However, as I leaned over the counter and reached out to the cash register....a small man spat in my eye

When i could see again i was surrounded by ...............................

When i could see again i was surrounded by .................... dwarfs.

"We were here first but if you're nice we can always......

"We were here first but if you're nice we can always.....find you some room "

In a daze i agreed and was taken into ....................

In a daze i agreed and was taken into ........... the storeroom.

"Help yourself to some food if you like", so I...................

"Help yourself to some food if you like", so I...................made myself a little snack .

" How long have you guys been here ?" i asked . " Well " said one of them " We ........................

" How long have you guys been here ?" i asked . " Well " said one of them " We ......... gagged the owner only a couple of hours ago... d'ya wannta see him?"

The littlest one opened a cupboard door and there the owner was....

The littlest one opened a cupboard door and there the owner was....bound and gagged and completely naked !

The dwarfs had been using him as a sex toy , the look on his face was .............

The dwarfs had been using him as a sex toy , the look on his face was ......... one of pure bliss.

I ripped the gag off and he said: ".......................

I ripped the gag off and he said: "...Give me more "

So i slapped him around abit and ......................

So i slapped him around abit and .............. then gagged him again.

I then noticed a safe with the door open so I helped myself to.......

I then noticed a safe with the door open so I helped myself to......the camps wages .

Then i jumped in a helicopter and ...................

Then i jumped in a helicopter and ........ left Billy on the tarmac looking peeved.

Approaching the outskirts of LA, I noticed................

Approaching the outskirts of LA, I noticed........the fuel gage was looking low

So i set it down straight away , but i didn't know .................

So i set it down straight away , but i didn't know ........... how to turn it off.

I grabbed the ration pack under the seat and......................

I grabbed the ration pack under the seat and........headed off into some nearby woods

After a few hours a came across a cave and went inside ......................

After a few hours a came across a cave and went inside ............ but was met by a ticket collector.

Disneyland was an amazing place really.....

Disneyland was an amazing place really.....fun

Mickey Mouse was walking past me when ...........................

Mickey Mouse was walking past me when ......... I emerged from the cave.

"Hello there... how are you today?", he said. "..........................

"Hello there... how are you today?", he said. "..A talking Mouse ! " i shouted and ran away .

Those pills i had taken were really sending me on a trip .................

Those pills i had taken were really sending me on a trip .......... into paranoia land.

I thought the lady usher was a .......................

I thought the lady usher was a ..............Alien !

" Have you come here to take me away ?" i asked , she looked at me ................

" Have you come here to take me away ?" i asked , she looked at me................

through the grotesque sphere that was her one eye, placed on ...................

through the grotesque sphere that was her one eye, placed on ............long tentacle .

I could see the fear in my own reflection , my legs ......................

I could see the fear in my own reflection , my legs ......................

Shapely and slim and covered with my wife's sheer black stockings, turned to ...........

Shapely and slim and covered with my wife's sheer black stockings, turned to ...

Jelly and i fell to the floor , of course this was all in my head and actually ............

Of course this was all in my head and actually ............ as I awoke from my dream.

I had been king hit from behind in the alley (reading the 'WE WANT YOU! poster) and was now gathering my senses in................

I had been king hit from behind in the alley (reading the 'WE WANT YOU! poster) and was now gathering my senses in...........time to see a naked chorus line .

I ran after them and ...............................

I ran after them and ..................... got a seat right next to the stage.

Their first number was quite......................

Their first number was quite......boring really

But the second, well ..........................