Complete the sentence

First topic message reminder :

This is a game where you complete the sentence of the previous post and start off a new sentence for the next poster to complete.

Its not to make a story, just a load of random sentences.

To start you off:

The fridge door wouldnt open so I............

She was quite attractive for a baboon despite having mothered over a dozen offspring. This was my chance so I carefully......................laid down

I was trying to look like a baby needing feeding but ..........................

I was trying to look like a baby needing feeding but ......... I needn't have bothered.

I was carefully picked up by her and taken back into the enclosure whereupon.....................................

I was carefully picked up by her and taken back into the enclosure whereupon...........she started nibbling my neck

I was getting turned on , when all of a sudden..................................

I was getting turned on , when all of a sudden............... her 'hubby' walked back in looking pleased after his conquest of Conchita.

Much to my surprise, instead of joining in... he sat down and started to read a Times article about..............................

Much to my surprise, instead of joining in... he sat down and started to read a Times article about..............nuclear powerstations

" Do you know i am quite worried about these ! " he said , A talking monkey ! my mind was seeing the $ sings , when.........................

" Do you know i am quite worried about these ! " he said , A talking monkey ! my mind was seeing the $ sings , when........... he then asked me if I would like a cup of tea or something slightly stronger perhaps?

Not only does this monkey talk... he had Silver Service training! "Have you ever thought of a career in showbiz?" I asked. "I'm sure..........................

Not only does this monkey talk... he had Silver Service training! "Have you ever thought of a career in showbiz?" I asked. "I'm sure.....................you could be a star "

" A star my dear boy ? A star ? I am already a star ! Have you not seen my ......................................

" A star my dear boy ? A star ? I am already a star ! Have you not seen my ........... dance routine?"

With that he hopped on a table and did the most flawless tap-dance routine which had elements of the classic film:.........................................

With that he hopped on a table and did the most flawless tap-dance routine which had elements of the classic film:..............singing in the rain

It was then i realised the rain wasn't rain but ...............................

It was then i realised the rain wasn't rain but ......................... a mixture of saliva and jism.

The zoo keeper stood at the gate with a stern look. "I suppose you want me to.....................................

I suppose you want me.............. Shave that silver back gorilla with my Swiss Army knife. I said that's quite impossible!

He then suggested..........

He then suggested.........i sharpen it

So i got out my ..............

So i got out my ............. oil stone and began to sharpen the knife.

"Go easy around my nostrils, please - they are quite........................

"Go easy around my nostrils, please - they are quite........tender especially the right one .

My hand started to shake as i got nearer his face , then a spasm and i cut his head off with one almighty slash . There was a scream from behind me and then ...........

My hand started to shake as i got nearer his face , then a spasm and i cut his head off with one almighty slash . There was a scream from behind me and then ......... it all went dark.

I was just about to turn around to see what had happened when................

I was just about to turn around to see what had happened when.........the female charged me

I had no choice but to ...............................

I had no choice but to .......................... assume the crash position.

This was apparently what the males do in the wild so in a matter of seconds I was being.................................

This was apparently what the males do in the wild so in a matter of seconds I was being............attacked

It was a fight to the death , which i .....................................

It was a fight to the death , which i ............................... was losing initially.

But just when thing were looking dire I noticed an empty plastic container which I quickly......................................

But just when thing were looking dire I noticed an empty plastic container which I quickly...........grabbed

Hitting the female repeatedly , im managed to over come her and staggered away victorious only to then walk into the ........................................

Hitting the female repeatedly , im managed to over come her and staggered away victorious only to then walk into the ................................... cleaners.

"You've sure left a big mess in here" one said. "Is this.................

"You've sure left a big mess in here" one said. "Is this...............your ear ? "

Checking both sides i was pleased to answer "No " , i walked away still wondering how ...................................

Checking both sides i was pleased to answer "No " , i walked away still wondering how ................ I'd managed to survive.

I was feeling tired so Jose, Conchita, Mum and me decided it would be good to go back to the hotel to get some rest and..............................

I was feeling tired so Jose, Conchita, Mum and me decided it would be good to go back to the hotel to get some rest and..............................stuff as much toilet paper into the bowl as we could. However, when we got to the door...........................

However, when we got to the door......................... our card-key wouldn't work.

Luckily a cleaner was in the next room so he let us in. "Don't worry Sir, I'll get Reception to bring you a key which works. As an apology please accept this complimentary.....................

Luckily a cleaner was in the next room so he let us in. "Don't worry Sir, I'll get Reception to bring you a key which works. As an apology please accept this complimentary.............back sack and crack waxing


I had never had one before but was curious so i ............................................

I had never had one before but was curious so i ................... entered the clinic just before 3pm.

A large Romanian lady asked me to lie face down on the padded table with my face through the hole. I could see her hairy legs... so I asked her "do you often get this.............................

A large Romanian lady asked me to lie face down on the padded table with my face through the hole. I could see her hairy legs... so I asked her "do you often get this........treatment yourself ?"

" Shut up " she shouted " Stay still and i will try not to hurt you !" . The wax was warm as it touched my butt cheeks and as the pad was placed on i ................................................

" Shut up " she shouted " Stay still and i will try not to hurt you !" . The wax was warm as it touched my butt cheeks and as the pad was placed on i ....................... flinched a little.

She then rolled me sideways and stared at my hairy nutsack. " You want me to...........

She then rolled me sideways and stared at my hairy nutsack. " You want me to.........do everything all at once ?"

Before i could answer she swiped the pad away from my arse ! , for a second all was ok ......then the pain hit me and i .........................................................

Before i could answer she swiped the pad away from my arse ! , for a second all was ok ......then the pain hit me and i ......................................................... yelled so loud the shutters trembled and a fake Gaugin painting fell onto the floor.

Before I could catch my senses she ripped the one off my sack. The feeling was akin to......................................

Before I could catch my senses she ripped the one off my sack. The feeling was akin to.........a blow torch being applied

I think i jumped a good 4 feet off the table , but that didn't stop her as she ......................................

I think i jumped a good 4 feet off the table , but that didn't stop her as she ............ ripped the pad off my main shaft next.

"That looks much better don't you think?" she said. "You'll be..............

"That looks much better don't you think?" she said. "You'll be..........fighting the ladies off "

The thought of anyone going near me at this point was enough to make me .......................................

The thought of anyone going near me at this point was enough to make me ................. get a hard on.

As she leaned over to get another strip I seized my opportunity and...............

As she leaned over to get another strip I seized my opportunity and.........planted a wet one on her lips

I didn't get the reaction i was hoping for , as she poured all the hot wax all over my ............................................................

I didn't get the reaction i was hoping for , as she poured all the hot wax all over my ......... chest.

Before I could react, she ripped it off and it was then that I noticed my nipples..............

Before I could react, she ripped it off and it was then that I noticed my nipples........were now on the strip

I ran naked from the room screaming , i can only guess what everyone thought seeing a naked red raw man running down a corridor being chased by a ......................................................................

I ran naked from the room screaming , i can only guess what everyone thought seeing a naked red raw man running down a corridor being chased by a ............ crazy Romanian woman.

I was halted at the door by her sons who thought I was trying............

I was halted at the door by her sons who thought I was trying.........run out without paying

" Hey i thought it was free !! " i shouted at them , but they just .........................

" Hey i thought it was free !! " i shouted at them , but they just ....................... frog-marched me back into an empty laundry room.

"You're gonna tell us everything" one said "or else you're gonna get a taste of this...............

"You're gonna tell us everything" one said "or else you're gonna get a taste of this.........and he pulled out a huge whip

My legs turned to jelly as i ............................................

My legs turned to jelly as i .................................. pondered my predicament.

However, just as he was limbering up with the whip - the alpha male's mate, Kgonola came up behind him and........................................

However, just as he was limbering up with the whip - the alpha male's mate, Kgonola came up behind him and......................entered him

His eyes swelled with tears as the pain hit him , but the monkey would not stop and just kept ..........................

His eyes swelled with tears as the pain hit him , but the monkey would not stop and just kept .......... having its way with him for about 15 minutes.

By the time she was finished I had managed to get back out the door as the other bloke was trying to help his mate and it was a relief to................

By the time she was finished I had managed to get back out the door as the other bloke was trying to help his mate and it was a relief to............be free again .

As soon as i could i swapped hotels , and as i relaxed in my new room i remembered ......................

As soon as i could i swapped hotels , and as i relaxed in my new room i remembered ............ I had forgotten something.

Mum had returned to the salon but Jose & Conchita were still...............

Mum had returned to the salon but Jose & Conchita were still..........not here yet .

It was then the sad news of their deaths reached me , a phone call from the chief of police informed me they had died in a .....................................

a phone call from the chief of police informed me they had died in a .....................................bucket. "Bloody hell!" I exclaimed, "that's something I.....................

"Bloody hell!" I exclaimed, "that's something I.....................wasn't expecting "

" How did it happen ? " i asked , " Well " said the chief " They .......................................................