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I've already sent you mine.
Northern hemisphere fist.

My fish seem unfazed.

rick_dagless wrote:My fish seem unfazed.

My cat is acting like a complete ar$ehole so I don't think it affects animals.

A stray cat around here has been going on a murder spree. 2 dead pigeons on my front lawns in recent weeks. Wondering if someone has it in for me... but no... definitely not.

Situation Build-up Report:

During the fires/smoke/45 degree days one side of the front lawn went brown/black. It was as if someone had applied a blowtorch to it.
A passer-by suggested it was most likely a grub of some description. I was half stunned anyway... so I did nothing and just let it be.

Then we had massive rain... over 550mm in a short space of time. These lovely green shoots appeared again but another passer-by told me it was a special kind of weed. Looked like lemongrass to me. I just let it grow to cover the above ugly brown/black patches. Cut it once or twice and let the weed grow back.

However; I had unwittingly created the prefect stalking environment for the killer cat. Some parts of the new growth were halfway up the shins. What better place to lie in wait. Oh and also... I had put some seed down in the vain hope of getting some lawn back... which the unfortunate pigeons must have had a taste for. Think the white one (its head was missing!) was the dominant male so I guess you could say I killed two birds with one dose of lawn seed. It has been very quiet here on the pigeon front ever since.

A court jester and an ex-gladiator walk into a empty tavern only to see the publican wiping down the bar.

"Sorry guys... didn't you see the Acta Diurna out the front? We're closed!"

Fist, how we holding up, guys?

Sicond. OK. Somewhat better than my ex-pigeons.

How's the virus vibe with you, rick?

No probs here, the supermarkets are a bit irritating, I am tending to shop day to day for food so as to give the shops time to stock up.

But I went last night to get Mrs D's Gran her shop and I was struggling to get her everything which got on my nips somewhat, as she can't get out. So will have to try again at the weekend.

Barring that all gravy, all a bit surreal at the moment.

At least petrol is very cheap now. Filled up the car last night like it was 1999.

Nice, just make sure to use it so it doesn't go off, shouldn't be hard in a country the size of Oz I expect.

It always makes me chuckle in the apocalyptic films where people are syphoning fuel from cars. It goes off that quick it would probably be useless.

Just converted... about 49p/litre. Not bad all. Just under half of what it was in January.

Don't worry... I'll use it. Good times to go cruising around when there seems to be less people on the roads. So long as they don't announce a total curfew I should be OK.

I suspect it will be tough to enforce nationwide at Oz.

Don't think we are a million miles away from it here to be honest. But messages are updated constantly.

I have several entertainment systems so all good here.

I've just cancelled my FoxSports... including beIN, ESPN, etc. Only 5 hours until midnight then it goes off. Won't miss it. Nothing on anyway.

Can always watch ABC iView and still have History & Documentaries but I might cut that too. Same stuff over and over again... seen it all.

Disney+ starts on Tuesday, which covers all the Marvel and Star Wars stuff which cost me £35 for the year.

Netflix has announced it is reducing streaming quality in Europe for a month though that is proper first world problems right there.

Of course there is always pornhub.

Gave Netflix the flick already. All those smartarse emails... had enough of that. Not into any of the superhero/comic/marvel stuff.

Using pornhub sparingly too! Only dodgy & dangerous Russian sites for me.  

I like Netflix it has a lot of Anime on there which I can happily watch away.

Sensible, I am sure Galts can point you in the right direction for some solid Eastern European grumble flicks.

Think I've already turned the full circle. I'm now entering a sort of celibate monk phase. Something different.

Are you getting all sorts of long-winded emails from organisations "pledging Coronavirus awareness" etc?

I've received quite a few from builders, suppliers and loads of other industry people all of sudden. Whilst I appreciate their openness and honesty... it also has this sense of desperate arse crawling political correctness about it. Probably the same lot of selfish, self-important snotty nosed 'do-gooders' that spread the bloody thing around in the first place and now they all want to apologise about it at the same time? ffs... Get real and buzz off!

Yep, I deal, as you would imagine, with a lot of various suppliers.

I have had to put en email rule on anything external containing "corona" goes to another folder. I then check this if I get a mo. to make sure I am not missing anything.

I'm so glad I'm not alone.

It's a horrible situation but I'm not sure all these emails really help us. It'll be licked in "12 weeks" as Boris said. Hope he's right.

Where's Galts? Really miss his RDR2 updates. Hope he's not frothing toothpaste on the footpath somewhere near the DLR.

I suspect he is cornered in a room by an aggro cat.

Either that or wandering the plains in search of ladies of loose morals.

Or dead.

Hello chaps. Still alive, just got back from an unsuccessful expedition to buy bananas. 6 c*nting shops.

Funnily enough I am now being stalked and attacked by the cat.

Ha ha. Evil creature.

Plenty of bananas here. I wish I could send you over a crate of them. Before the next natural disaster strikes. How's the aubergine situation at present?

I see America is sinking quite fast. Can see a weirdos vs zombies riot breaking out soon in LA.

Haha, cheers, I'm sure the accompanying spiders would kill off the panic-buyers. Aubergines are occasionally available.

I meant to add above; in these even more stressful times your cat is just probably trying to show you some affection and play a hunting game with you. A bit like RDR2. Sometimes they just forget they have sharp claws in all the excitement.

Spiders seem a bit thin on the ground around here at the moment. That super hot day we had in January was maybe too much for them. Death by dehydration perhaps? Hardly any flies, mozzies, moths, bees and pigeons either. Less ants too. Something strange going on here.

Galted, I'll swap you a banana for a cup of vegetable oil.

We have lots of oil and bacon up here.

Anything you need that I can barter with?

JuliusHMarx wrote:Galted, I'll swap you a banana for a cup of vegetable oil.

Much appreciated. I've also got some caster sugar and a cat I don't need.

Pal Joey wrote:I meant to add above; in these even more stressful times your cat is just probably trying to show you some affection and play a hunting game with you. A bit like RDR2. Sometimes they just forget they have sharp claws in all the excitement.

Spiders seem a bit thin on the ground around here at the moment. That super hot day we had in January was maybe too much for them. Death by dehydration perhaps? Hardly any flies, mozzies, moths, bees and pigeons either. Less ants too. Something strange going on here.

Maybe some new super-predator has been unleashed.  Have a look at the pigeon corpses again.

Re the cat, for the most part she is playing.  We have a complicated hide-and-seek game we play a couple of times a day, if I don't hide in one of my designated places and take her by surprise she gets really angry and some bleeding ensues.

About the only thing left in t' Tesco was quinoa which made me very happy. Not because I eat it, I don't, but because Tino was wrong about southerners and our eating habits.

JuliusHMarx wrote:Anything you need that I can barter with?

top tip for oil, many of the off licenses/petrol stations and ethinc shops have lots of oil.

I noticed recently that Pears soap was still to be seen in a few places - at £2+ a bar - which goes to show that people aren't that desperate.

Local the Sainsburys has run out of cans of the beer I usually buy from there.

I'm prepared to wipe my bum with my hand (not a problem in polite society now that hand-shaking has been ruled out) but I am not prepared to adapt to a different beer.

Time to riot!

Managed to get a large Aero bar and a packet of Cadbury's mini-eggs. Crisis? What crisis?

Weekend panic fist.

I'm not Kenny Rogers.
He picked a fine time to leave us.

Morning, peeps, remember to not comment immediately because of social isolating, leave at least 2 minutes between replies.

Quaranfist. Though I am still WFW

sicond - wfh and the timetable that Mrs Superfly has devised for us seems to involve me getting up at 5:30 and finishing work at 23:30.

Mrs D is WFH, and although she works out of the bedroom, and myself in the living room I feel that Corona would be the second most likely reason for death in my house if we don't separate for at least some time.

I guess we are now going to find out what people who don't use the pub to socialize, do all weekend...

Tird.

Feel as though I've got a head start on this thing. I hardly ever go to casinos.

After a weekend stuck in the house I reckon it's only a couple of more days until both my kids end up in the "vulnerable" category.

Little one's nursery is now also closed and to top it all off, I'm fairly certain that Mrs Superfly is entering the pre-menstruation phase.

I have been ignoring people for years so this should be fairly straight forward..

The supermarkets around here are starting to chill out as well, the d1ckheads have either run out of space or money, it seems.

Huge queues at Centrelink (welfare) offices today. Just saw it on the news. Reminds me of a scene I saw in Katowice in 2005 except they look better dressed here.  Not sure how we're going to cope with this situation with mass panic setting in.

We will be in lockdown soon if people don't start listening.

Morning all.

Spent all weekend socialising in parks and at banging house parties because I won't be told what to do. Hiding away means that the Coronavirus wins! I don't recall England winning the Second World War and the '66 World Cup by hiding away.

It is baffling how many people my age are claiming their parents were in the war...

They're probably talking about the 1st Iraq War.

I think that common sense was the only thing to be rationed in that one, peej.

Seems that quite a few people are discovering that doctors and nurses save lives. Who would've thought it?

Had a young army SAS guy stay here with his Canadian girlfriend who told me "... because Iraq is right on the Equator... blah, blah, blah..." Geography is obviously not his strong point. He was also covered in tattoos and told me the one on his back took 14 hours and it was "the most painful thing he had ever experienced." Begs the question.... doesn't it?

In a weird twist, the antivax folks seem to be quiet, but they have been taken over by god botherers claiming that they can pray it away.