Complete the sentence

First topic message reminder :

This is a game where you complete the sentence of the previous post and start off a new sentence for the next poster to complete.

Its not to make a story, just a load of random sentences.

To start you off:

The fridge door wouldnt open so I............

The croupier spun the roulette wheel and ...............and ball bounced around .

Finally landing on ...............

Finally landing on .......... zero. I lost some money there.

I decided to place another bet, this time i chose.......

I decided to place another bet, this time i chose....... 0, balck and red.

I knew it would hit one of those three, but.......

I knew it would hit one of those three, but....... a black-out put an end to that.

Disheartened, I caught the lift back down to my room on....

Disheartened, I caught the lift back down to my room on.... my own .

Or at least i thought i was until ......................

Or at least i thought i was until ......................I saw Demi Moore come out of the en-suite.

She was wearing nothing but.....

She was wearing nothing but an invisibility cloak, which was a crushing disappointment.

I decided to...

I decided to... squirt her with my special 'vision ink' though.

The sight of the purple ink trickling down her...

The sight of the purple ink trickling down her didn't make up for the fact that it had also killed her.

I held my head in my hands and...

I held my head in my hands and ....thought what am i going to do with the body .

I decided to saw her into ....................

(This thread has taken a grisly turn!)

I decided to saw her into a pile, which I covered with the invisibility cloak.

Then I...

Then I .....carried the piece out to the woods .

Once there i looked around for .................

Once there I looked around for Demi's ghost, which I swear was following me.

I heard a...

I heard a .....potters wheel turning

And i knew i was not alone ...............

And I knew I was not alone when I heard a spectral voice singing 'Unchained Melody.'

My hair stood on end...

My hair stood on end ........but that was down to to much gel .

I like to look my best while out in the woods , you never ..............

I like to look my best while out in the woods , you never know when you might meet a fellow randy pervert.

As it so happened...

As it so happened ...from behind a tree

Out jumped a buxom blonde wearing ..........

Out jumped a buxom blonde wearing another invisibility cloak!

I pulled out my...

I pulled out my... purple love truncheon.

But as I randily approached her vague outline...

But as I randily approached her vague outline, an enormous wang emerged from 'her' undercrackers.

I turned on my heels...

I turned on my heels... but my angle strap got caught on a tree root.

As I landed on the mossy ground....

As I landed on the mossy ground, I heard footsteps coming closer and closer.

I opened my mouth to scream...

I open my mouth to scream .....and she shoved .

A very large ......................

A very large ...................... pair of binoculars in my hands.

"Can you see that?" she said "It's not often that..........

"Can you see that?" she said "It's not often that.....you see a red tailed warbler at this time of year .

I was shocked , but also ............

I was shocked , but also ............ somewhat relieved and thrilled at the same time.

Suddenly there was a loud burst of gunfire and......

Suddenly there was a loud burst of gunfire and......and then a thud

As i looked around i stumbled over .................

As i looked around i stumbled over ................. a two-toed sloth.

It's hair was a greasy green colour and it had.....

It's hair was a greasy green colour and it had......a huge bullet hole in its head .

I dont know what came over me but i picked it up and ................

I dont know what came over me but i picked it up and ............. attempted mouth to mouth.

Much to my surprise it coughed up some bile and....

I dont know what came over me but i picked it up and started grinding my crotch against it.

The buxom blonde saw this and...

The buxom blonde saw this and... called the police.

When they arrived, the sloth was.....

When they arrived, the sloth was....covered in man juice

The officer took one look and ..........................

The officer took one look and said in a camp voice, "well someone really likes sloths!"

I was very confused by this point and...

I was very confused by this point and......tried to run away

The officer gave chase screaming ...............

The officer gave chase screaming .......... "Stop, or I'll call for back-up!"

It was then that I reached the edge of a cliff. Down below was.......

Down below was a trampoline - but quite a small one.

I thought long and hard...

I thought long and hard... before I jumped.

After bouncing back up to the top of the cliff.....

After bouncing back up to the top of the cliff....... i grabbed the officer

And planted a big kiss on his ......................

And planted a big kiss on his truncheon.

He lost his balance and...

He lost his balance and...fell over the cliff .

Unfortunately he missed the small trampoline , hitting ................

Unfortunately he missed the small trampoline , hitting ................ the whirlpool below like a small stone.

Without hesitation, I dived off the cliff too....

Without hesitation, I dived off the cliff too....try and save him .

But he had gone by the time i hit the water , i ...............

But he had gone by the time i hit the water , i said "go go gadget flippers!" and swam down to see my old mate Poseidon.

He was half-p!ssed when I arrived and...

He was half-p!ssed when I arrived and...... and getting jiggy with a couple of mermaids .

When he saw me he smiled and .......................

When he saw me he smiled and ....................... came.

"Well, that was a happy ending, wasn't it?" I chuckled as....

"Well, that was a happy ending, wasn't it?" I chuckled as...i wiped my face .

Sorry about that said...................

Sorry about that said................... Poseidon. I should have warned you about that.

"How can I make up for it? Have you met my mermaid friend....

"How can I make up for it? Have you met my mermaid friend....Finderella

With that a beautiful redheaded mermaid swam across and .................