The Culture Cup round 6

First topic message reminder :

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:Decided to treat myself to a 3-piece variety meal but the Wrap-It-Up is between work & the KFC so you can probably imagine what happened.

Your Hi-Techs started to squeek?

Probably but I was too hungry to notice.  Almost broke into a run as I approached the Wrap-It-Up.

Have you ever been to Tamada by the way?  Georgian restaurant off Abbey Road.  Went there for my birthday and found no reason to complain.

I'm not really a London person. Occasionally Putney or Clapham to see mates or Lords for the cricket.

If Georgian food is anything like Estonian fayre I may give it a miss.

seanmichaels wrote:Thought we'd agreed on a pipe and I nailed her presents for a change.

What did you get her?

Mind the windows Tino wrote:What did you get her?

I'm guessing cricket books and a bobo coat?

She found out early and reciprocated

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:Thought we'd agreed on a pipe and I nailed her presents for a change.

What did you get her?

weekend away at a highly rated nice pub/hotel. orla kiely umbrella, muji slippers and some tart juice from anthropologie.

seanmichaels wrote:orla kiely umbrella, muji slippers and some tart juice from anthropologie.

I now know where I went wrong - Tesco umbrella, Tesco slippers, Tesco orange juice.

seanmichaels wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:Thought we'd agreed on a pipe and I nailed her presents for a change.

What did you get her?

weekend away at a highly rated nice pub/hotel. orla kiely umbrella, muji slippers and some tart juice from anthropologie.

I only understood the weekend away bit. Orla Kiely? No. Muji slippers? No. Tart juice from Anthropologie? Is that something to do with insects?

Four gifts though. You must really love her.

seanmichaels wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:Thought we'd agreed on a pipe and I nailed her presents for a change.

What did you get her?

weekend away at a highly rated nice pub/hotel. orla kiely umbrella, muji slippers and some tart juice from anthropologie.

Bloody hell.  I got my new-found ladyfriend interest a bottle of Amarula, a couple of mugs (was only supposed to be one but the play.com website is f*****g useless) and a book, The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint) .  She didn't seem too disappointed and the cost to me was under £50. Would've been closer to £40 if it wasn't for play.com.

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:Thought we'd agreed on a pipe and I nailed her presents for a change.

What did you get her?

weekend away at a highly rated nice pub/hotel. orla kiely umbrella, muji slippers and some tart juice from anthropologie.

I only understood the weekend away bit.  Orla Kiely?  No.  Muji slippers?  No.  Tart juice from Anthropologie?  Is that something to do with insects?

Four gifts though.  You must really love her.

Muji and Anthropologie are shops, surprised you haven't heard of them. Orla Kiely just adds her designs/patterns and name to stuff and makes it 10x more expensive.

Pub is Beckford Arms in wiltshire. Sounds good.

seanmichaels wrote:
Muji and Anthropologie are shops, surprised you haven't heard of them.

I only really go the The Asda, The Tesco and occasionally The Waitrose.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:
Muji and Anthropologie are shops, surprised you haven't heard of them.

I only really go the The Asda, The Tesco and occasionally The Waitrose.

Is that when you go to the The shops?

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:
Muji and Anthropologie are shops, surprised you haven't heard of them.

I only really go the The Asda, The Tesco and occasionally The Waitrose.

Not The Aldi?

Found out this morning she needs a hip replacement. 2 months recuperation at home. I may have to send her to her mothers.

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

Based on the coat she bought you and the fact your missus needs a hip replacement can I ask Sean, are you 90?

Rowley wrote:Based on the coat she bought you and the fact your missus needs a hip replacement can I ask Sean, are you 90?

I think I'm 34. She's 43

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

The discussion helped me to overcome the trauma of the muff scene.

seanmichaels wrote:

Rowley wrote:Based on the coat she bought you and the fact your missus needs a hip replacement can I ask Sean, are you 90?

I think I'm 34. She's 43

The brother of one of my ex-colleagues had a hip replacement at 31, apparently he has to have one every ten years as they wear out.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

Is it strawberry blonde? Love her in boogie nights.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

I've watched Short Cuts and I don't recall you and Galted even being in it, let alone having a chat about Julianne Moore's* muff.

*apostrophe included

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

I've watched Short Cuts and I don't recall you and Galted even being in it, let alone having a chat about Julianne Moore's* muff.

*apostrophe included

Did you see the directors cut? We were in that one.

Galted was leaning against the fridge whilst I held the ironing board for Ms Moore.

seanmichaels wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

Is it strawberry blonde? Love her in boogie nights.

Nope, it's can't-go-out-into-the-sun-ever ginger.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

I've watched Short Cuts and I don't recall you and Galted even being in it, let alone having a chat about Julianne Moore's* muff.

*apostrophe included

Did you see the directors cut?  We were in that one.

Galted was leaning against the fridge whilst I held the ironing board for Ms Moore.

You can't see me clearly as it's a black fridge and I'm being stealthy.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

I've watched Short Cuts and I don't recall you and Galted even being in it, let alone having a chat about Julianne Moore's* muff.

*apostrophe included

Did you see the directors cut?

No, I only saw the short cut.

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

I've watched Short Cuts and I don't recall you and Galted even being in it, let alone having a chat about Julianne Moore's* muff.

*apostrophe included

Did you see the directors cut?

No, I only saw the short cut.

Sorry, just realised I missed the letter 'n' out of my question.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:The Lady's Guide to Perfect Gentility: In Manners, Dress, and Conversation (Classic Reprint)

I initially read that as "The Lady's Guide to Perfect Genitalia"

Galted and I once had a fairly in-depth discussion on Julianne Moores muff in Short Cuts.

I've watched Short Cuts and I don't recall you and Galted even being in it, let alone having a chat about Julianne Moore's* muff.

*apostrophe included

Did you see the directors cut?

No, I only saw the short cut.

Sorry, just realised I missed the letter 'n' out of my question.

OK, no, I didn't seen the director's cut.

Brilliant.

Sometimes, I really f*cking hate you, Julius.

The last three posts caused me to snigger loudly which is unfortunate as one of my colleagues had a right old rant just seconds before.

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Rowley wrote:Based on the coat she bought you and the fact your missus needs a hip replacement can I ask Sean, are you 90?

I think I'm 34. She's 43

The brother of one of my ex-colleagues had a hip replacement at 31, apparently he has to have one every ten years as they wear out.

Yes. This is why they kept trying to fix it before. It's funny, she's not a unit or anything. She has no knee cartilage after a skiing accident where she fractured her knee. They reckon it is something to do with that.

Galted wrote:The last three posts caused me to snigger loudly which is unfortunate as one of my colleagues had a right old rant just seconds before.

What about?

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:The last three posts caused me to snigger loudly which is unfortunate as one of my colleagues had a right old rant just seconds before.

What about?

The combined incompetence of our purchasing team and help desk.

Galted wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

Galted wrote:The last three posts caused me to snigger loudly which is unfortunate as one of my colleagues had a right old rant just seconds before.

What about?

The combined incompetence of our purchasing team and help desk.

Is he justified in his criticism?

He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com.

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com.

what kind of mugs were they? the ones where the clothes come off the bloke when you pour hot water in?

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com

Should get together with the Accounts Payable team here, to have the perfect storm of purchasing F""&*^ up

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com.

what kind of mugs were they? the ones where the clothes come off the bloke when you pour hot water in?

Nope, Keanu Reeves in his band.

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com.

what kind of mugs were they? the ones where the clothes come off the bloke when you pour hot water in?

Nope, Keanu Reeves in his band.

Are you still with her?

rick_dagless wrote:

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com

Should get together with the Accounts Payable team here, to have the perfect storm of purchasing F""&*^ up

It's really frustrating as they don't just make the odd c0ck-up, they're virtually functionally illiterate.  You can predict most of the f***-ups they'll make before they make them and they still surprise you with previously unplumbed depths of idiocy.  Yet, because they work for the bank and aren't outsourced like me, they earn about double what I do and I have to repeatedly clear up their f**k-ups and explain to them how to do their jobs.

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com.

what kind of mugs were they? the ones where the clothes come off the bloke when you pour hot water in?

Nope, Keanu Reeves in his band.

Are you still with her?

Yep. She loves him.

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com.

what kind of mugs were they? the ones where the clothes come off the bloke when you pour hot water in?

Nope, Keanu Reeves in his band.

Are you still with her?

Yep.  She loves him.

And you know that can't be bad...

Galted wrote:It's really frustrating as they don't just make the odd c0ck-up, they're virtually functionally illiterate. You can predict most of the f***-ups they'll make before they make them and they still surprise you with previously unplumbed depths of idiocy. Yet, because they work for the bank and aren't outsourced like me, they earn about double what I do and I have to repeatedly clear up their f**k-ups and explain to them how to do their jobs.

yup, you end up pre apologising to vendors etc, as you know the inevitible ineptitude will occur at any moment, and keeping everything in triplicate, "just in case"

rick_dagless wrote:

Galted wrote:It's really frustrating as they don't just make the odd c0ck-up, they're virtually functionally illiterate.  You can predict most of the f***-ups they'll make before they make them and they still surprise you with previously unplumbed depths of idiocy.  Yet, because they work for the bank and aren't outsourced like me, they earn about double what I do and I have to repeatedly clear up their f**k-ups and explain to them how to do their jobs.

yup, you end up pre apologising to vendors etc, as you know the inevitible ineptitude will occur at any moment, and keeping everything in triplicate, "just in case"

Pretty much, they're an ongoing joke with the vendors and every mail of theirs is kept and filed away as evidence (which is frequently used).

JuliusHMarx wrote:

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:

seanmichaels wrote:

Galted wrote:He would be justified if he were to garotte them, they are even more useless than play.com.

what kind of mugs were they? the ones where the clothes come off the bloke when you pour hot water in?

Nope, Keanu Reeves in his band.

Are you still with her?

Yep.  She loves him.

And you know that can't be bad...

For God's sake, Julius, let it be.

Speaking words of wisdom there Galted

I should've known better.

Than to cheat a friend?

lying there staring at the ceiling

Hello?

Is it me you're looking for?

Sh1t on here tonight.

And this morning.

Stop Sh1tting on the boards...