The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by **seanmichaels** Thu 01 Oct 2015, 1:17 pm

First topic message reminder :

Daddy long legs are a nightmare for cricket groundsman. Their larvae are called Leatherjackets feed on the roots of the grass and can devastate the square. Season is done but the crows are digging up the bastards on my square at the moment.

by Guest Thu 08 Oct 2015, 9:16 am

rick_dagless wrote:
DAVE wrote:Dropped my Liverpool Cup this morning. Shattered everywhere.

Just need sean to come in and sort the mess to finish the analogy...

That would mean most matches were lost due to being massively hungover or because they spent 70 minutes talking sh!t about how many birds they'd f*cked....the one consolation would be that the pitch looked quite nice (apart from the discarded cider cans, vomit and clothes strewn everywhere due to being homeless)

by **rIck_dAgless** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 9:17 am

LoL out loud

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 9:22 am

I was on the roller in june having a few ciders when a fly flew into my mouth. I don't think I swallowed it but it kind of got a gag reflex going. Had another sip of cider and it caused me to throw up in a patch on the square. Mostly liquid, but over the next few days it turned the patch brown. Caused a lot of amusement when the oppo skipper asked what had caused it during the next game.

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:03 am

seanmichaels wrote:I don't think I swallowed it but it kind of got a gag reflex going.

Said Sean to his old school chums as they fondly remembered that hazy summer in '96 when Quentin first became prefect.

by Guest Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:09 am

Would have thought your schooldays would have ensured your gag reflex was virtually non-existent, Sean.

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:13 am

DAVE667 wrote:Would have thought your schooldays would have ensured your gag reflex was virtually non-existent, Sean.

l*l

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:14 am

DAVE667 wrote:Would have thought your schooldays would have ensured your gag reflex was virtually non-existent, Sean.

Ok Boggs.....

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:18 am

I can see you as the bloke from Old School who does the blowjob training, sean.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:22 am

Alistair wrote:I can see you as the bloke from Old School who does the blowjob training, sean.

That is a bit gay.....

I am frank the tank out of old school.

by Guest Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:27 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Alistair wrote:I can see you as the bloke from Old School who does the blowjob training, sean.

That is a bit gay.....

I am frank the tank who blows all his old school chums.

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:31 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Alistair wrote:I can see you as the bloke from Old School who does the blowjob training, sean.

That is a bit gay.....

I am frank the tank out of old school.

With your gagging skills mate you could be an asset, you could try using it to get laid.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:35 am

Cricket Dinner this weekend. Usually a few strays available if I can stay semi sober.

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:49 am

seanmichaels wrote:Cricket Dinner this weekend. Usually a few strays available if I can stay semi sober.

Different kind of pu$$y mate.

by Guest Thu 08 Oct 2015, 10:52 am

seanmichaels wrote:Cricket Dinner this weekend. Usually a few strays available but I can barely manage a semi these days.

by **rIck_dAgless** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 11:06 am

sean wrote:Cricket Dinner this weekend. Usually a few g@ys available but I can barely manage a semi these days.

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 11:19 am

seanmichaels wrote:Cricket Dogging this weekend. Usually a few strays available if I can stay semi.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 11:36 am

DAVE667 wrote:
seanmichaels wrote:Cricket Dinner this weekend. Usually a few strays available but I can barely manage a semi these days.

And the winner is....... Dangerous Dave. RFl*l

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 12:17 pm

ONETWO with a quality put down to Toppy.

by **superflyweight** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 12:29 pm

Toppy's playing a dangerous game. Onetwo once went so far as to threaten me via PM and Toppy too could soon be on the receiving end. I don't mind saying that I was genuinely frightened and that I hired Edward Woodward to watch my back.

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 12:50 pm

Why would you hire the Vice-Chairman of Man Utd to protect you?

by **superflyweight** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 1:05 pm

Because the other one is dead.

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 1:11 pm

You could've just asked Denzel?

by **superflyweight** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 1:30 pm

From Only Fools and Horses?

by Rowley Thu 08 Oct 2015, 1:32 pm

Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 1:40 pm

Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 1:57 pm

superflyweight wrote:From Only Fools and Horses?

Denzel Curry.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:01 pm

[quote="Mind the windows Tino."]

Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?[/quote

TSMR?

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:03 pm

Good quoting, Sean.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:04 pm

what happened there?

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:04 pm

wasn't trying anything fancy....

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:05 pm

you still going to use your tickets?

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:10 pm

i wonder how many consecutive posts i can get in?

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:10 pm

This is five.....

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:11 pm

seanmichaels wrote:you still going to use your tickets?

Almost certainly. We are in Spain the week before and I made Mrs Windows book earlier flights home on the Friday so I can go on the Saturday.

She'd get a right cob on if didn't go.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:18 pm

Had hoped to take a week in the sun first week of November myself. That'll have to be put on hold now.

by Rowley Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:19 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

Pot noodle and a w&nk

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:20 pm

Rowley wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

Pot noodle and a w&nk

Excellent choices.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:20 pm

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:33 pm

Rowley wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

Pot noodle and a w&nk

What flavour?

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:35 pm

Alistair wrote:
Rowley wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

Pot noodle and a w&nk

What flavour?

He didn't say it was a posh I play with my 2inch cock.

by Guest Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:36 pm

Alistair wrote:
Rowley wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

Pot noodle and a w&nk

What flavour?

Who has flavoured w-anks?

by **rIck_dAgless** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:39 pm

DAVE wrote:Who has flavoured w-anks?

Cameron has smokey bacon

by Alistair Thu 08 Oct 2015, 2:45 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Alistair wrote:
Rowley wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

Pot noodle and a w&nk

What flavour?
Who has flavoured w-anks?

Could've been a posh one with a flavoured rubber.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 3:13 pm

Alistair wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
Alistair wrote:
Rowley wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:Afternoon all, home for lunch . Happiest I have been all week.

What's on the menu?

Pot noodle and a w&nk

What flavour?
Who has flavoured w-anks?

Could've been a posh one with a flavoured rubber.

That is what I alluded to but the swear filter stole my thunder. C*nt

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 3:14 pm

rick_dagless wrote:
DAVE wrote:Who has flavoured w-anks?

Cameron has smokey bacon

l*l

You deserved better than to let this slide into obscurity, rICk.

by Guest Thu 08 Oct 2015, 3:18 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
DAVE wrote:Who has flavoured w-anks?

Cameron has smokey bacon

l*l

You deserved better than to let this slide into obscurity, rICk.

Surely it would be smoky bacon flavoured blow jobs

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 3:21 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
DAVE wrote:Who has flavoured w-anks?

Cameron has smokey bacon

l*l

You deserved better than to let this slide into obscurity, rICk.
Surely it would be smoky bacon flavoured blow jobs

But the pig was dead. So it must have been a w*nking receptacle, rather than a blow job?

Can dead things give you blow jobs? I've had a few that might as well have been delivered by a corpse, but technically I'm pretty sure the person or animal has to be living.

by Guest Thu 08 Oct 2015, 3:25 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
DAVE wrote:Who has flavoured w-anks?

Cameron has smokey bacon

l*l

You deserved better than to let this slide into obscurity, rICk.
Surely it would be smoky bacon flavoured blow jobs

But the pig was dead. So it must have been a w*nking receptacle, rather than a blow job?

Can dead things give you blow jobs? I've had a few that might as well have been delivered by a corpse, but technically I'm pretty sure the person or animal has to be living.

Should it have been referred to a s a "facew_ank" then?

by **ShahenshahG** Thu 08 Oct 2015, 3:31 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
rick_dagless wrote:
DAVE wrote:Who has flavoured w-anks?

Cameron has smokey bacon

l*l

You deserved better than to let this slide into obscurity, rICk.
Surely it would be smoky bacon flavoured blow jobs

But the pig was dead. So it must have been a w*nking receptacle, rather than a blow job?

Can dead things give you blow jobs? I've had a few that might as well have been delivered by a corpse, but technically I'm pretty sure the person or animal has to be living.
Should it have been referred to a s a "facew_ank" then?

If Tino's the f*cewanker it would be a post mortem dental floss

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 08 Oct 2015, 3:33 pm

Oh Shah
You're barmy
You're getting bummed by the Red Army

Shah!
Shah!

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