The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

First topic message reminder :

rick_dagless wrote:

The Loaded Dog wrote:

rick_dagless wrote:

Tino wrote:Why would they advise not to kill them? Not that anyone listens I guess but why would they advise that?

They keep the mosquito, cockroach, silverfish, etc... numbers in check. They are always open for spider donations from the general public for venom milking purposes.

Good answer. Very well said.

Cheers TLD, I learnt from the best...

I know that, but I just find it odd that there is actually specific advice on the subject.

It must be fact you actually have an arthropod world worth talking about.

Morning notches.. week off work so will not be around much but can someone kindly inform Galted I posted very clear reasons as to why Chloe Madeley should be c*nted but inform him he's free to add disparaging comments about James Haskell as well

Been rolling the cricket square last week or so. Ranges between pleasant and fecking Baltic.keeping relatively busy at mo albeit half work is non paid.painting 2 sheds today...

Did windows get duffed up on the rugger field?

Morning DAVE/sean...

Nice new location sean... The weather here keeps going the same way sean, one minute nice and springy, next all windy and wintery.

Who changed that? Stupid bender Adam no doubt.

Be on a little later gents all good but computer systems gone haywire. Don't know if you'll find it as funny as me, but I got a call complaining about the I.T. system from some south american guy with a strong accent and I laughed. He responded by raising his voice and said 'it's not funny man, jesus creased'. I think he will report me today for laughing at his accent.

South African? Ask him 'what's your varb bru?'

rick_dagless wrote:Morning TLD, how goes the good fight?

Going well thanks mate.
Down at the local tucking into some proper veal schnitzel now. I think they order the veal especially for me. Their faces light up when I approach the counter.
Might go for some cake later.

Nice choice of food mate, as long as the outer of the schnitzel does not hide loads of fat inside then I do enjoy them...

rick_dagless wrote:Nice choice of food mate, as long as the outer of the schnitzel does not hide loads of fat inside then I do enjoy them...

riCK. You're alive.

I'm happy even if no one else is.

Thanks mate, are you well?

rick_dagless wrote:Thanks mate, are you well?

Aye, not bad. Fighting an increasingly losing battle against the drag of work and commuting but other than that, life is good.

You?

rick_dagless wrote:Nice choice of food mate, as long as the outer of the schnitzel does not hide loads of fat inside then I do enjoy them...

It was very lean meat with a light golden crust... not much oil came out when cut.
I consider myself a connoisseur and world authority on schnitzel. Good mashed potato and assorted vegetables... with 3 prawns in a creamy sauce on the side (they call it "surf & turf") washed down with the ubiquitous Tooheys New lager.  I'd give it about a 8.25/10

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

rick_dagless wrote:Thanks mate, are you well?

Aye, not bad.  Fighting an increasingly losing battle against the drag of work and commuting but other than that, life is good.

You?

All good here mate, long weekend spent with friends and we didn't get beat in the Tyne/Wear derby, so I will take that as a win! How did the rugger go?

Sounds like a proper schnitzel TLD

rick_dagless wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

rick_dagless wrote:Thanks mate, are you well?

Aye, not bad.  Fighting an increasingly losing battle against the drag of work and commuting but other than that, life is good.

You?

All good here mate, long weekend spent with friends and we didn't get beat in the Tyne/Wear derby, so I will take that as a win!  How did the rugger go?

Sounds like a proper schnitzel TLD

We lost. They were 3rd, we are 3rd bottom. We lost by about 5 points which I thought was a decent effort, but Shah then had a pop at me for being too British.

So for Shah:

We were f*cking sh*t, riCk. Absolutely abysmal and I have set fire to my boots in protest.

Ah, well normally I would say that it seemed like a good effort, but in light of what's occurring in Brussles, I better toe the party line on this one.

For the sake of F**k windows, how could you go home and look your wife and kids in the face after a performance like that... C**t

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/latest-street-food-trend-man-7605200

rick_dagless wrote:Ah, well normally I would say that it seemed like a good effort, but in light of what's occurring in Brussles, I better toe the party line on this one.

For the sake of F**k windows, how could you go home and look your wife and kids in the face after a performance like that... C**t

He didn't...he never does

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/latest-street-food-trend-man-7605200

You hoping for the reverse fixture with scolapendra gigantica (spelling?) munching on a homunculus?

rick_dagless wrote:

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-news/latest-street-food-trend-man-7605200

You hoping for the reverse fixture with scolapendra gigantica (spelling?) munching on a homunculus?

I've eaten some weird sh*t in China before but never a giant centipede. I couldn't do it.

seanmichaels wrote:South African? Ask him 'what's your varb bru?'

What does that even mean?

Is it like Irn Bru?

DagLESsed.

It would seem so... I thought it was an amusing interlude whilst sean and Raf went to get a room.

rick_dagless wrote:It would seem so...  I thought it was an amusing interlude whilst sean and Raf went to get a room.

It wouldn't trouble your top 50 witticisms, but it didn't deserve to kill the thread off so early.

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:

rick_dagless wrote:It would seem so...  I thought it was an amusing interlude whilst sean and Raf went to get a room.

It wouldn't trouble your top 50 witticisms, but it didn't deserve to kill the thread off so early.

Agreed, we are a fickle bunch on here at the best of times...

What has amused me recently was someone upsetting a portion of social media by pointing out that a trick was missed when weight watchers did not call themselves Chubby Checkers...

And another... boom

ShahenshahG wrote:"Excuse me, doctor - my husband was rushed in with violent spasms in his buttocks. Where is he?"

"ICU baby, shaking that ass"

Rick would love this.

I thought this would be right up your street!

ShahenshahG wrote:

ShahenshahG wrote:"Excuse me, doctor - my husband was rushed in with violent spasms in his buttocks. Where is he?"

"ICU baby, shaking that ass"

Rick would love this.

I thought this would be right up your street!

LOL out loud, it is indeed, and one I shall be using later...

Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl in the bathroom?

Because it has a silent P

Why did the bakers hands smell?

Because he kneaded a poo

I Used to date a dyslexic woman. I took her home one evening and she ended up cooking my sock.

What did one tampon say to the other tampon?

Nothing - they were both stuck up bitches..

There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down her sneered at me and I thought, well that’s a little condescending.

I once knew a guy with a narcissistic schizophrenic guilt complex..

Used to stand for hours in front of the mirror saying "that's the man officer"

How did the hipster burn his tongue?

He drank his coffee before it was cool.

I started a band called 999 Megabytes — we haven’t gotten a gig yet

Gents,

How are we all?

Apologies for my absence, the site keeps giving me a virus and i'm trying to reduce the amount of times i have to send my laptop to IT.

Hello Alistair. We're all good, just struggling for inspiration now that Sean the Sh*t factory Michaelmas is unavailable.

What happened to Sean? Is he ok?

He's not right, but he's ok. Just busy doing the cricket groundsman with a high pitch keening sound in a couple of shed's on a two for 1 deal.. At least I think that's what he said.

seanmichaels wrote:Been rolling the cricket square last week or so. Ranges between pleasant and fecking Baltic.keeping relatively busy at mo albeit half work is non paid.painting 2 sheds today...

Did windows get duffed up on the rugger field?

Yep. My memory hadn't failed me.

Afternoon all.

Portion of unsalted chips. 3/10. Afternoon Jizzy Jeff

Ham salad sandwich, bag of monster munch (beef) solid but uninspiring. 4.5/10

Afternoon Jeff

Ham and coleslaw sarnie, bag of Seabrooks beef crisps, and a cup of cream with a hint of mushroom soup... 4/10

Afternoon Juniper Julius

Evening guys.

Just got woken up by the garbage truck. Obviously a very angry council worker. Made so much noise banging things around.

Enjoy your dinners

Morning Tetchy TLD and Rejuvenated Rick. Luckily our binmen collect at 10-11 AM so pretty relaxed about em.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4QY47B9TN0

This will make you feel better.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9So7lELvDos

This will remind you of last night


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qDvn1TMOWj8


and a pleasant start to the day


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nA3OsQnc9aM

M0ning mate, in hot chick central office today so happy days...

You well?