The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

by **JuliusHMarx** Fri 10 Apr 2015, 10:48 am

First topic message reminder :

Hajduk

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:12 pm

Rowley wrote:4 is drop it like it's hot I believe, by Snoop Doggy Dog

by Adam D Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:12 pm

Rowley wrote:Fish, Dog, Cat, Seal

Animals is the connection.

Correct - anyone going to get number 2?

by **rIck_dAgless** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:14 pm

That horrendous thing by Samantha Fox...

by Rowley Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:14 pm

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:4 is drop it like it's hot I believe, by Snoop Doggy Dog

I am down with the kids Tina (non Yewtree)

by Adam D Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:17 pm

rick_dagless wrote:That horrendous thing by is Samantha Fox...

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:29 pm

So the actual connection is animals that can be killed by hitting them with a wooden club. Could have even had a song by goregrind band PROSTITUTE DISFIGUREMENT...that would have worked as well

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:33 pm

DAVE667 wrote:So the actual connection is animals that can be killed by hitting them with a wooden club. Could have even had a song by goregrind band PROSTITUTE DISFIGUREMENT...that would have worked as well

I reckon you'd be hard pushed to kill a fish with a wooden club. Not impossible, but difficult. To get the required force to travel through the water resistance without the fish moving would be tricky.

Unless it was on dry land which would place it at a serious disadvantage.

by **Union Cane** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:35 pm

It is probably a jumping fish (eg salmon for example), you could bat it when it leaps from the flowing torrent.

by Mind the windows Tino. Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:37 pm

Union Cane wrote:It is probably a jumping fish (eg salmon for example), you could bat it when it leaps from the flowing torrent.

That's a fair point. Still difficult though, as presumably you'd be balanced on wet rocks which would provide treacherous underfoot conditions.

Bears as well. They commonly feed on leaping salmon. SerialDAVE will have to watch out for them.

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:38 pm

Asian carp are regularly hit by paddles they normally panic and respond by leaping out of the water and inadvertently smashing into the rowers.

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:39 pm

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-magazine-monitor-32301982

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:40 pm

Rowley wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:
Rowley wrote:4 is drop it like it's hot I believe, by Snoop Doggy Dog

I am down with the kids Tina (non Yewtree)

Rowley is truly a renaissance man And I say that without sarcasm.

by **JuliusHMarx** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:41 pm

What animal can't you kill with a wooden club?

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:43 pm

You're all a bunch of thick c*nts ('cept Tina who sort of got it....there's a reason he's my favourite). Fishermen take them out of the water and whilst THEY'RE STILL ALIVE...hit them hard on the head with a billy club type instrument (of death!!!!)....either that or like the bloke I saw in Scarborough once, they swing the fish very hard at a metal mooring post.

by **Union Cane** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:44 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:What animal can't you kill with a wooden club?

Plankton.

by **Union Cane** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:44 pm

Union Cane wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:What animal can't you kill with a wooden club?

Plankton.

And a tortoise.

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:47 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:What animal can't you kill with a wooden club?

None...I've tried and thus far it's been a success. Am approaching the subject methodically and alphabetically. Spend a number of years on H (for hookers naturally) but am doing well thus far. Am hoping Queen Bee will be acceptable but then again as it's my own list (as opposed the official "Which animals can you kill with a wooden club" list) I'm sure it will be fine

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:48 pm

Union Cane wrote:
Union Cane wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:What animal can't you kill with a wooden club?

Plankton.

And a tortoise.

Nope....two whacks for a regular domestic tortoise, thirteen for one of those Galapagos tortoises....and three each for the armed guards protecting this supposedly endangered species

by **Union Cane** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:50 pm

What if he pulls his little head in?

by **rIck_dAgless** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:51 pm

You would be hard pressed to kill an elephant with a wooden club

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:54 pm

Union Cane wrote:What if he pulls his little head in?

I just smash him in the general groin area until he capitulates...oh, you mean the tortoise as opposed to the fella guarding him.

by **Union Cane** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:55 pm

rick_dagless wrote:You would be hard pressed to kill an elephant with a wooden club

Shoot him with a shotgun, he wouldn't get near enough to use it.

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:55 pm

rick_dagless wrote:You would be hard pressed to kill an elephant with a wooden club

aye ml but it may sit on his face so win win for him

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:56 pm

rick_dagless wrote:You would be hard pressed to kill an elephant with a wooden club

It takes a while and you might need a small trampoline to get enough height but I'm nothing if not persistent....which I believe were the judge's parting words as the sentence was handed down

by **JuliusHMarx** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 2:58 pm

DAVE667 wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:What animal can't you kill with a wooden club?

None...I've tried and thus far it's been a success. Am approaching the subject methodically and alphabetically. Spend a number of years on H (for hookers naturally) but am doing well thus far. Am hoping Queen Bee will be acceptable but then again as it's my own list (as opposed the official "Which animals can you kill with a wooden club" list) I'm sure it will be fine

So the link is just animals then. The 'you can kill with a wooden club' part is redundant.

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:02 pm

JuliusHMarx wrote:
DAVE667 wrote:
JuliusHMarx wrote:What animal can't you kill with a wooden club?

None...I've tried and thus far it's been a success. Am approaching the subject methodically and alphabetically. Spend a number of years on H (for hookers naturally) but am doing well thus far. Am hoping Queen Bee will be acceptable but then again as it's my own list (as opposed the official "Which animals can you kill with a wooden club" list) I'm sure it will be fine

So the link is just animals then. The 'you can kill with a wooden club' part is redundant.

Haven't got to the end of the alphabet yet Jules. There may be a surprise

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:03 pm

Ouch...f*cking RHINOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

by Adam D Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:17 pm

Surely Zebras are at the end. Not much of a surprise.

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:21 pm

Zebu actually

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:22 pm

unless hybrids count then its zonkey or zorse

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:26 pm

Adam D wrote:Surely Zebras are at the end. Not much of a surprise.

Talking about the resilience of certain creatures...the yak for example takes more whacks than previously imagined. The thick fur absorbs a lot of the power and the overwhelming stench makes you feel light-headed. If you're not on your game, they could suckerpunch you

by **seanmichaels** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:30 pm

I've eaten a Zebra. Not a whole one, part of it's arris i suspect.

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:40 pm

seanmichaels wrote:I've eaten a Zebra. Not a whole one, part of it's arris i suspect.

Were you doing a Bushtucker trial at the time?

by **seanmichaels** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:46 pm

Nah, was at some Saffa restaurant outside Johannesburg. It was the muscle not the bumhole if that's what you're getting at. Is bumhole offal?

by Guest Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:47 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Nah, was at some Saffa restaurant outside Johannesburg. It was the muscle not the bumhole if that's what you're getting at. Is bumhole offal?

Aye it doesn't taste nice at all (b'dum dum tshhhh!")

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 3:48 pm

seanmichaels wrote:Nah, was at some Saffa restaurant outside Johannesburg. It was the muscle not the bumhole if that's what you're getting at. Is bumhole offal?

Should ask the sperm whale you put in there last night

by **Galted** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 6:28 pm

This the latest in my series of impressions of mammals interacting with arthropods. I call it "Part 4: michaels interacting with an arthropod whilst out preparing the pitch for Sunday's game".

I hope you like it.

Arthropod: Corrr!!! Look at that fella in the T-Tech by Tumi on that Toro ZS 4200T Timecutter Zero Ride-on mower. Seriously wish I was one of them two-legged bits of gash so I could get me pedipalps on his hampton.

Michaels: bog off, anthropod.

by **ShahenshahG** Wed 15 Apr 2015, 6:29 pm

by **Pal Joey** Thu 16 Apr 2015, 2:01 am

Warm here again.

Just came across of couple of arthropod nests. Feel like a bastard... killed 5 or 6 with cut bricks and then chucked their mangled corpses in the skip. Don't know where the males are... they don't have the red stripe and are harder to pick out against the earth.

However, that's nothing compared what the Afghan kid did with the wasps. The poor buggers didn't stand a chance.
Talk about a ruthless approach to fixing the problem. Shah would be very impressed with the foolproof method of complete & utter destruction.

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:05 am

First again.

Apart from LD but he doesn't count as he's a cobber.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:14 am

Toro ride on mower.... I wish. I have an Atco B30 Royale and a Protea Greensmower. And a Protea verticutter. And a roller.....

I am thinking of applying for the next series of the Island but am worried that you have to be a spaz to qualify.

Morning.

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:19 am

You'd be on the satellite phone and requesting a evacuation quicker than that fat, attention seeking builder.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:30 am

Mind the windows Tino. wrote:You'd be on the satellite phone and requesting a evacuation quicker than that fat, attention seeking builder.

What a c*nt that bloke was. Blatantly did the trip to give up the ciggies and crashed after a day.

I'd be fine, not really a team player but I'd catch fish for them all. Nice little burly trail into a sort of sheep pen in the shallows of the beach. Easy.

Did you see that anthropod bite the ginger nut last night? Bet is smarted.

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:35 am

seanmichaels wrote:
Mind the windows Tino. wrote:You'd be on the satellite phone and requesting a evacuation quicker than that fat, attention seeking builder.

What a c*nt that bloke was. Blatantly did the trip to give up the ciggies and crashed after a day.

I'd be fine, not really a team player but I'd catch fish for them all. Nice little burly trail into a sort of sheep pen in the shallows of the beach. Easy.

Did you see that anthropod bite the ginger nut last night? Bet is smarted.

They don't have good looking shrinks on the Island though?

I don't think he really wanted to leave, just pig headed and couldn't cope with being seen as weak and backing down so followed through with his threat. He was hoping the old dude would get up and quit first. When that didn't happen, he swallowed his balls and walked.

Yeah, I did have a chuckle at the scorpion sting. He deserved it for being ginger.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:40 am

I would be happy on the island. No rules, no women and no crowds.

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:41 am

seanmichaels wrote:I would be happy on the island. No rules, no women and no crowds.

And 13 other barely dressed men.

by **seanmichaels** Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:43 am

Shah must have experienced island life on his various training camps?

by Mind the windows Tino. Thu 16 Apr 2015, 8:45 am

seanmichaels wrote:Shah must have experienced island life on his various training camps?

Definitely. Replace the noise and fury of Pacific Island thunder storms with the boom of Jordanian missiles.

by Rowley Thu 16 Apr 2015, 9:05 am

When you talk of the Island are you referring to the film with Ewan McGregor, if so I remember it very differently from your conversations.

by **rIck_dAgless** Thu 16 Apr 2015, 9:10 am

Jeff wrote:When you talk of the Island are you referring to the film with Ewan McGregor, if so I remember it very differently from your conversations.

I have seen one with Leo Di Caprio?

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