The Culture Cup Round x - Adam is a naughty naughty boy

First topic message reminder :

Dad passed away yesterday. Mowing a lawn at the time. Spent some time with him and very peaceful.

just to liven the place up a bit

Cattle and wild deer align themselves in a North South direction. No-one actually knows why.

Barry Manilow’s No. 1 hit ‘I Write the Songs’ wasn’t written by Barry Manilow.

Whales can’t taste anything but salt.

Michael Sata, a previous president of Zambia, previously worked as a cleaner at London Victoria railway station.

Research using rabbits has led to 26 Nobel Prizes for Physiology or Medicine.

35% of American cat owners, never let their pet outside.

According to his wife Mary, Abraham Lincoln’s hobby was cats.

At the end of 2011, the FTSE index stood at 5572: 1358 points lower than it was at the end of 1999.

The world’s largest water slide in Kansas City is taller than Niagara Falls.

Turritopsis Nutricula is a sea-creature that reverts back to polyp stage after breeding, earning the nickname 'The Immortal Jellyfish'.

69% of the cocaine sold in the US contains de-worming medication.

What do you call a cricket or a katydid who got really really really drunk?

The Sandal Bomber wrote:What do you call a cricket or a katydid who got really really really drunk?

No idea...

You call him deaf, Rick.

Tina would have gotten that. It saddens me that he is dead. Curse you Junior, curse you to deepest pits of the seventh hell.

Is it because they are legless and their ears are in their legs Shah?

If so, I understood, and was too busy sewing my sides together and collecting my head from whence it had landed to respond in time.

Not sure I am looking forward to this football game, at least you can squeeze in a nap whent the game is on mate, no one is going to rob the place when the football is on.

Wooooo. I shall never doubt you again. Sadly the football is being watched in the restaurant and the reception area. So not only will I have to watch the f*cking game everyone around me is going to be eating my favourite foods and drinking my favourite drinks plus maybe a couple of beers each.

The Sandal Bomber wrote:Wooooo. I shall never doubt you again. Sadly the football is being watched in the restaurant  and the reception area. So not only will I have to watch the f*cking game everyone around me is going to be eating my favourite foods and drinking my favourite drinks plus maybe a couple of beers each.

@r5e, it is going to be strange watching the game with no beer in hand mind, any Welsh at your place?

Yeah about 5 or 6. The Scots are supporting the Welsh also. My manager came in wearing one red sock and one green sock the fat jock I am a twonk of the highest order haha. He's proper on the windup buoyed by the fact he's on holiday from Saturday. Plus with no horse in this race he is immune from disappointment apart from the sort you carry around with you for being Scottish.

None here, which is a shame... Can't have any banter, which, to be honest, may be a good thing.

I'm Scottish and couldn't care less who wins.

Haha

Daddy,
I am coming home to get married soon, so get out your check book. I'm in love with a boy who is far away from me. As you know, I am in Australia, and he lives in Scotland. We met on a dating website, became friends on Facebook, had long chats on Whatsapp, He proposed to me on Skype, and now we've had two months of relationship through Viber.
My beloved and favorite Dad, I need your blessing, good wishes, and a really big wedding."
Lots of love and thanks,
Your favorite daughter,
Lilly

My Dear Lilly,
Like Wow! Really? Cool!
Whatever....., I suggest you two get married on Twitter, have fun on Tango, buy your kids on Amazon, and pay for it all through Paypal. And when you get fed up with this new husband, sell him on eBay.
Love,
Dad

FIst Notches

Somber beginning to the day Tino, condolences mate. I got a frantic drink/drug induced call by an old friend yesterday or rather this morning at 4am. Apparently they had released a ginormous peruvian centipede by knocking over his tank and wanted help on how to recover it before the owner of the house found out. He was then cut off by a woman's scream in the background followed by shouts of "kill it". So the poor unfortunate owner of the house was just in time to see a fat drunken lass crush his centipede by upturning a nest of tables on it and jumping up and down upon it before slipping, knocking the table aside and landing bum first on the now dead centipede then screaming bloody murder and crab walking away with half a centipede plastered on her skirt. You've no idea how much I regret it had to happen Tino, it's a sentiment that fought valiantly with my regret of not being there at the time but it lost. defeated but not disgrace.

Morning Rick the shtick.

Morning Shah

Cool story bro, I think the lack of sleep is getting to you mate.

How is the weekend shaping up? To Sleep? Perchance to dream?

Just bored actually. Slept fine until 4 Am when they knocked over the tank and called me then realised it was still in the tank the stupid pissheads. I spent the last two hours trying to dream up a wondrous ignominious death for it but as you can see, I didn't succeed. Yeah some sleep and maybe the gym come midnight to keep my blood flowing well. You got anything planned?

https://youtu.be/jRswxxT3HQ8

Morning notches. Not the most original choice today but I'm going to see the Roses so it was never likely to be otherwise.

this weekend I have nothing planned for once, so I intend to make the most out of it by doing hopefully very little, though Mrs D is threatening to drag me out to a fathers day meal with the in laws for some reason...

The family do not seem to be able to converse with each other when they are in each others company.

I'll be recovering and reflecting on the fact I am 43 not 23 now

rick_dagless wrote:this weekend I have nothing planned for once, so I intend to make the most out of it by doing hopefully very little, though Mrs D is threatening to drag me out to a fathers day meal with the in laws for some reason...

The family do not seem to be able to converse with each other when they are in each others company.

Are they punishing your Mrs for not giving em grandkids? Happens all the time in asian families where not having kids is usually out of medical problems rather than choice. You should buy them a gift and accidentally on purpose leave an abortion leaflet inside it. Er, although try and get it professionally wrapped so the wife doesn't blame you.

Rowley wrote:I'll be recovering and reflecting on the fact I am 43 not 23 now

You weigh two tophats

Your maths is terrible shah. 43 is half a top hat.

Rowley wrote:Your maths is terrible shah. 43 is half a top hat.

Sorry Rowley, I erroneously accounted for double vision, what I thought were four jubblies were actually two jubblies with a unnaturally resilient push up bra dividing them into 4. But this begs the question are you the bottom half or top half of tophat?

The bottom, I'm not being stuck with his brains.

The Sandal Bomber wrote:

rick_dagless wrote:this weekend I have nothing planned for once, so I intend to make the most out of it by doing hopefully very little, though Mrs D is threatening to drag me out to a fathers day meal with the in laws for some reason...

The family do not seem to be able to converse with each other when they are in each others company.

Are they punishing your Mrs for not giving em grandkids? Happens all the time in asian families where not having kids is usually out of medical problems rather than choice. You should buy them a gift and accidentally on purpose leave an abortion leaflet inside it. Er, although try and get it professionally wrapped so the wife doesn't blame you.

Nah they have grandkids from the brother in law, I get on better with her dad than most of the family do to be fair, I get a lpot of grief from her Nan for the lack of grandkids, but one big scare will take care of that...

Rowley wrote:The bottom, I'm not being stuck with his brains.

Rowley's brains are in Tophat's breeches.


Is this a subtle request for a special ramadhan scare Ricko?


Usual fees plus a motorhome with a driver so I can get some sleep to and from the job.

Nah I am saving my Shah Special offer discount for a special occasion mate, plus I will need you on point, so let me know when you have had some decent kip and we will get on it.

Excellent. I was going to send Hassan to take care of this easy job but you are as astute as ever.

The Sandal Bomber wrote:

Rowley wrote:The bottom, I'm not being stuck with his brains.

Rowley's brains are in Tophat's breeches.

I was either ending up with his quarter witted Daily Mail reading Alan Partridge brains or his Zeppelin sized arse. Lesser of two evils I suspect.

Morning all, tremendous result at the footie and then switched over to the shocking news my local MP had been shot dead right outside the Library where I take my children, She was also the sister of my wife's aerobics teacher....surreal to say the least!

Morning Serial Knave, was sorry to hear about that, she seemed like an ok sort.

I've no great interest in politics, local or otherwise, so can't say I was completely au fait with her and her specific policies but irrespective of all that, it's an absolute tragedy.

An absolutely daft state of proceedings when one of the actual nice MP's is in danger...

RAVE556 wrote:Morning all, tremendous result at the footie and then switched over to the shocking news my local MP had been shot dead right outside the Library where I take my children, She was also the sister of my wife's aerobics teacher....surreal to say the least!

Horrendously shocking news, Dave.


***

Glad you enjoyed Slovakia's win over Russia too. Wasn't that a fantastic way to slap a bear in its face... on a football pitch. Wow.

England done good too but... them rugby blokes of yours will probably give The Wallabies another slow painful skinning too - on Saturday night.

It's almost too much... for them (and us) to bear. Especially just days before another origin loss which seems inevitable. Embarrassing.

Hey TLD, long time no write, barring the rugger, how goes the antipodes?

rick_dagless wrote:Hey TLD, long time no write, barring the rugger, how goes the antipodes?

Hi Rick. All going well thanks mate. How are you?
Cool mornings but we had 22 degrees here last week.
Not a puff of wind. Often have to peel off clothes when outdoors in the sun. Hard to believe it is winter.
Expecting another mini hurricane this weekend... on Sunday.

I've been following the EU referendum. Quite an important decision for you all to make; in fact very important. To think the whole complexion of international relations, etc can suddenly be changed overnight after the 23rd... literally. Or not. Tempted to see an exit but think now is probably not the time to go it alone... with a certain amount of political/economic/social instability going on throughout the world. Who really can predict the ramifications? It's an interesting one.

We also have an election 2 weeks tomorrow on July 2. The Banker v The Unionist. Quite a clear cut way of seeing the two main candidates.

Glad to hear it mate, we are in the middle of wind and rain here, hard to believe it is summer, but that is not unusual to be honest.

At least we have the football to keep us indoors and happy along with the borderline alcoholism...

You out kite flying at the weekend?

How is the pool?

Pool nearly there. It has been put on hold for the last couple of weeks which means little in terms of the big scale of delays I've experienced.
The limestone around it looks superb but I'm concentrating indoors at the moment... then I'll get the pool completed in July.

I will await the finished results with great anticipation mate...

This weekend I will be mainly doing nowt, I am certainly leaving work early today, one of the benefits of being back up North...

I always find that when someone says that a person is "nice when you get to know them" is exactly the same as saying they are "A Tinkywinky but you will get used to it"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-manchester-36559182

How you liking the new name RAVE?

Whilst I'm around, can those who want their usernames changed back message me with what it shall be henceforth? Thanks.

Fist Notches. Grim rainy weekend spent in a Ramadan induced stupor in bed. I hope you all had a better weekend?

Had a great weekend cheers mate, food and beer and good company

Supposed to get summer this weekend also

rick_dagless wrote:Had a great weekend cheers mate, food and beer and good company

Supposed to get summer this weekend also

Seeing is believing! I have a good weekend ahead. On Friday my sister is getting married to the poor sod she's already married to, So i've made sure to double book a shift So i can avoid it. On saturday, I have been invited to a friends house to break my fast and he cooks fantastically well with lots of simple foods in very good combinations and on Sunday, I shall rest. You got anything planned for the anticipated good weather?

Not much this weekend to be honest, possibly playing football and have friends around on Friday I think, I have an inkling that something is supposed to be happening but can not for the life of me remember what it is.

Really busy week at work, so hopefully it will go pretty quickly.

I see all the names are back to normal, does that mean Adam has stopped his tizzy?

No, It means dolphin took pity on us.

https://youtu.be/aMiMZzKp84w

Morning all.